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Cay Gibson
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Just another article about communicative technology:
The Art of Communication
__________________
Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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guitarnan
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Just one more thought about living in Narnia...
I have been a member of another online community since the late 1990's...we all met on AOL in a book lovers' chat room, and eventually took our group off AOL and into e-mail mode so we could communicate over 3 continents without inconveniencing anyone. We're Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, agnostic, ???. We're married, single, divorced, parents, grandparents, godparents (dd's godfather is part of this group, too). We've been through a heck of a lot together.
One of our members saved the life of another (many states away) by helping her determine that she'd accidentally taken a life-threatening dose of her husband's medication.
We've visited each other, watched the Super Bowl together (Go Ravens!), celebrated births (you should see the darling, personalized stepstool/chair my dd received), worried about autistic children and advanced Lyme disease, supported one member as he kicked a cocaine addiction (six years ago, and he's totally clean!), and now are helping two of us navigate the strange world of cancer surgery and chemotherapy.
We all have families, friends and neighbors in our own cities and towns. But we're an online family. You'll never convince me that the Internet is all bad...I've been part of too many wonderful groups of real, life-long friends to think that.
It's amazing to think that two people who never met in real life can save and be saved...but I was literally there online when it happened.
If God can make the sun dance in the sky at Fatima, He can connect people via the Internet to friends who can change their lives.
We're all here, aren't we?
__________________
Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Willa
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I really believe the internet saved Aidan's life! I know God can work any way He wants to, but in Aidan's particular case the outpouring from our cyber-community was tremendous.
There is no way we could have had that storming of heaven just in our little local community. I think the blessings extended way beyond Aidan and us and rebounded to those who were praying. I don't think I could say any more than that.
I always think of that when people criticize the internet. Sure, it can be used wrongly. It's a medium, like typeprint. It can also be used for good.
__________________
AMDG
Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
Take Up and Read
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Rachel May
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I think I would say that maybe online communities are real. I think they have the potential to be real.
One difficulty though is that whether by accident or by design we can misrepresent ourselves here. We can seem better or holier or more organized. I once asked JennGM what I'm like here, and her response was a charitably worded, "You are a pain in the  ."  In person I must be a little different than that though because she will spend time with me and even knows what you will find if you move the bookcases in my dining room.
Or maybe the forum just gives an incomplete picture of who we are. And it is easier to maintain an incomplete picture when your online friend can't drop into your living room unexpectedly or spend 12 hours with you and your kids and see you get snappish at meal times. When we know each other outside this place, we recognize the voice and tone of the poster, but someone I only know through posts, I would not recognize in person. For example, when I met MicheleQ I did not think she looked like her picture that I had seen here. However, when I went back and looked at the picture, I could see that it was her. Do you know what I mean?
I think that our level of engagement is what makes this community real. For the first stringers here, it's a real community, but for the strap hangers and lurkers it is less so.
I was reading a bit of the Velveteen Rabbit today to think about this topic of real. I think it sums it up nicely.
__________________
Rachel
Thomas and Anthony (10), Maria (8), Charles (6), Cecilia (5), James (3), and Joseph (1)
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JennGM
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Rachel May wrote:
I think I would say that maybe online communities are real. I think they have the potential to be real.
One difficulty though is that whether by accident or by design we can misrepresent ourselves here. We can seem better or holier or more organized. I once asked JennGM what I'm like here, and her response was a charitably worded, "You are a pain in the ." In person I must be a little different than that though because she will spend time with me and even knows what you will find if you move the bookcases in my dining room. |
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WHAT????!!!! Rachel, shame on you! I never said such a thing or anything close to that!
And what I found behind those bookcases wasn't too incriminating.
Rachel May wrote:
| Or maybe the forum just gives an incomplete picture of who we are. And it is easier to maintain an incomplete picture when your online friend can't drop into your living room unexpectedly or spend 12 hours with you and your kids and see you get snappish at meal times. When we know each other outside this place, we recognize the voice and tone of the poster, but someone I only know through posts, I would not recognize in person. For example, when I met MicheleQ I did not think she looked like her picture that I had seen here. However, when I went back and looked at the picture, I could see that it was her. Do you know what I mean? |
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I explained this to Rachel. I met my husband online. We talked on the phone. We sent emails. We wrote letters. We met each other after a month and a half of corresponding. When he met me, he kept saying that he was having a hard time putting together "the different Jenn's". There was the Email Jenn, Phone Jenn, and the IRL Jenn. He preferred the In Real Life Jenn (of course) but it took some time for it all to converge to see the whole picture...writing and talking are only shadows of the person, not the complete picture.
And BTW, if you have a chance to meet Rachel in person, snatch it up. She's incredible. 
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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alicegunther
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The interesting thing I find is how very much the blogs of my IRL friends *do* represent who they really are. Just to give a few examples, I will say that even ten years ago as a new mommy, Lissa was already the brilliant, literature loving, homeschool savvy, sweet-as-sugar-to-her-children Mommy you love on the Bonny Glen. MacBeth, who I knew of online before meeting in person, is (and I don't know how she does this) *both* completely laid back and perfectly on top of everything--she's funny and knows off the top of her head everything you would ever want to know about nature. She will drive to your house in the middle of the night if you ever need anything. : ) Leticia is dedicated entirely to her family, but loves nothing better than a political conversation or an event promoting the pro-life cause, preferably combined with a beautiful liturgy. Helen is (and has been since college) devoted and holy in every way, but humble enough that she will blush to read this remark and disagree with it as well. Yet she also has a sense of humor that will keep you smiling! Mary Ellen Barrett is the funny, nurturing, all-for-the-family mom you would expect, the type of gal who would offer to, say, drive to California with you if you were missing someone in San Diego.
These are just a sample of the women I knew before we all started blogging, but I must say, at least for them, the blogs present an accurate picture.
It is true without a doubt that we do not see everything in another person's blog, but that is the case with all friendships, I think. How often have we met someone in person and formed an opinion, only learning more and deepening our understanding over the years?
Another thought I have on blogging is that even if a blog presents a mother's ideal rather than a whole picture, in seeing the ideal, we look into her heart, into her dearest hopes for her home and family. That in itself provides insight and truth, and, if anything, may be a quicker way to know someone than a talk over coffee at a homeschool gathering.
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Love, Alice
mother of seven!
    
Cottage Blessings
Brew yourself a cup of tea, and come for a visit!
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Elizabeth
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Rachel May wrote:
One difficulty though is that whether by accident or by design we can misrepresent ourselves here. We can seem better or holier or more organized. I once asked JennGM what I'm like here, and her response was a charitably worded, "You are a pain in the ." In person I must be a little different than that though because she will spend time with me and even knows what you will find if you move the bookcases in my dining room.
Or maybe the forum just gives an incomplete picture of who we are. And it is easier to maintain an incomplete picture when your online friend can't drop into your living room unexpectedly or spend 12 hours with you and your kids and see you get snappish at meal times. |
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I'm been thinking about this. I've been dropped in on unexpectedly a few times by people on the message board and I'd like to think that I've risen to the occasion. Truth is though, I don't like the unexpected. I'm very shy. That's been misinterpreted more than once and it does make me gunshy. Ironically, it doesn't make me gunshy about email penpals, but about IRL acquaintances.
I'm the first to admit that if you saw me spend 12 hours with my kids, I might get snappish. But I admit things like that here on the forum, too. When I really think about it, I'm more ME here than I am in person sometimes. In person, I'm shy and it takes me a long time to get to know someone and even longer to trust her.
In writing, some people can think "out loud" even better than they can in person. Relationships can begin and grow.
It's not that I don't cherish hugs and cups of tea. I do. When Lissa came to visit last summer, there weren't enough hours in the day to do all the talking we wanted to do. We have spent so much time in writing and on the phone that it never ocurred to me to be shy.
Some people might purposefully give an incomplete picture but not everyone does. And in a situation like Jenn's--where courtship might be involved--it would be silly to be incomplete. It would just make things complicated later. I think I look at most online relationships that way.
My best friend is a woman who read my column in the paper for six years and then introduced herself to me at the Smithsonian after hearing me call my children by name. She swears after hours and hours and hours of conversation during good times and terrible times that I'm who she thought I was through reading me. But I've had other people tell me otherwise.
I wonder though, if the medium for getting to know someone was just the local playgroup at the park followed by telephone conversations, couldn't you have two women come away with different impressions of the third? Whether the medium is email, mesage boards, blogs, telephones or fac-to-face, there is room for mistunderstanding and there is room to find and keep a kindred spirit.
__________________
Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Lissa
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alicegunther wrote:
| Mary Ellen Barrett is the funny, nurturing, all-for-the-family mom you would expect, the type of gal who would offer to, say, drive to California with you if you were missing someone in San Diego. |
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Take her up on it!!!
When we got ready to make this move, I wondered a lot whether Erica, who knew me only from online, would be taken aback or disappointed after meeting me in person. I already knew I would love her to pieces because Scott had met her family soon after arriving here, and he raved about them all summer and fall. "You are going to LOVE Erica," he said, and he was so right. Which of course came as no surprise to me, because I had loved her from her posts, and then our phone calls, and no one could have been kinder or warmer to us as we got settled in.
But I know that with a blog, it can be possible for people to get the impression that you never have bad days or lose your temper--which I do all too often! The thing is, I made a conscious decision to post about the GOOD in our lives, because I know my words will be out there for my children to read, and I want to be respectful of them. Karen Edmisten posted eloquently on this topic (here on the boards, I believe) a year or two ago.
On my blog, what I write is the truth, *part* of the truth, and nothing but the truth. That is, I'm never dishonest, but there are certainly things I *don't* write about. Like today, when one of my kids was naughty at Mass and had to be taken out...and it wasn't the toddler or baby. Ahem. I might occasionally discuss parenting challenges here, but I don't gripe about the children's faults on the blog.
I do worry, though, about giving people the wrong impression. I try to write frankly about my own shortcomings as a housekeeper and cook so that people won't think I've got EVERYTHING all together. I really don't! I'm good at the book-and-cuddle stuff and really hamhanded about all the rest.
That's also why I made my 'daily learning notes' blog public instead of private--I wanted to reassure the people who were writing me to say they couldn't possibly pull off what I do--my hope is that by showing what happens in the course of a day (sometimes very little), people won't mistakenly think I am doing ALL that stuff I write about EVERY day. It's a spectrum!
I totally agree with Alice about how blogging can make us be better mothers. I know there's this "Bonny Glen" ideal in my head, and every day I'm consciously trying to live up to it. I often fail.
I also agree with Alice that everyone I've met in real life HAS lived up to the online persona she presents--and I have met a LOT of you, now. Elizabeth, of course, who really should have been my neighbor in Va instead of two hours away because we will NEVER get all our talking done in phone calls and annual visits. MacBeth, Karen, Mary G, Mary M, Gwen, Chari, Bridget, Michele, Helen (whom I knew before her blog, and it has been such a treat to have more access to her holy and humble example through the blog!)--and many more, my goodness, so many beautiful women! As for Alice, I feel positively gloating about her now that she is blogging and you can ALL see how marvelous my best friend is.
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Lissa
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JennGM
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Such great points. I was thinking in particular to an aspect of Elizabeth's post. I'm also shy, and I don't think my true self comes out. But online and phone conversations really do break the ice, help one know the deep thoughts and ideals of a person, and help root out those awkward times when you're trying to feel out a person IRL to see if they are friend potential.
But another aspect, at least having little ones, it's hard to be yourself and really have a good one-on-one conversation when you have younger aged children. I can't tell you how many times even with my sisters that we don't get to REALLY talk or catch up when we get together. We're enjoying the moment, but we're sharing in watching our children who can distract and take away from the deep thoughts you would LIKE to share.
So many times my sister from Nebraska would come and visit and I'd be so disappointed that I forgot to talk about the things we planned. And even meeting Rachel and Mary Chris, things were rushed, distracted, and not conducive for deeper conversations. But sometimes email and phone conversations allow you those great conversations.
Truly, for a SAHM with younger children, online communities and blogging are a great gift.
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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alicegunther
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>My best friend is a woman who read my column in the paper for six years >and then introduced herself to me at the Smithsonian after hearing me call >my children by name.
That is so funny, Elizabeth! I actually met MacBeth's children while waiting for our violin lessons. My children hit it off with a fun loving family of homeschoolers, and, lo and behold, their names were Trip, Annika, and Paul (MacBeth was always in Libby's lesson with her, so I met the children alone). I asked Annika if their mother was CCM's MacBeth Derham, and, of course, it was!
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Love, Alice
mother of seven!
Cottage Blessings
Brew yourself a cup of tea, and come for a visit!
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Cay Gibson
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Part of the letter at Danielle Bean's blog states:
"The blogosphere isn’t a real community. It invites the dangerous high of abandoning our real families, those in our real lives who are waiting for us to get the heck off the computer and find time for them. The people in our real lives are waiting for us to come to dinner, read us a story, give us a kiss, hear about our day, empty the trash."
I just experienced this first hand. I was sitting here talking to all of you and dh and the children trooped outside with the fireworks and pizza.
To sit here and keep reading the threads would have been heartless and rude to the people I love and care about the most (not that I don't love and care about all of you too ). It would have been self-indulgent and I already need to work on that far too much. It also would have made me a fake to the message I share on my blog on the online communities I'm a part of.
My preference would have been to put on my jammies and some nice warm socks, tuck my feet up in my chair and read, read, read. But that's not my vocation.
So I shut everything down and went outside to enjoy pizza and fireworks, hold onto the dog's leash (because our dog is weird that way, she tries to eat the ignited fireworks  , clap for the brave younger girls to their shouts of "Mommy, I lit it! I did it!", and be there for the "Ooohhh! Ahhhh! Wow!" moments of life, and take a few pictures (possibly for blogging  ).
And I had fun! I knew I would. We always do.
Then everyone came inside to warm up. I fixed them all hot chocolate, the two younger girls took out their drawing pads, dh and ds sat down to watch the History Channel and dd is in her room decorating her mirror with ribbon and photos(an idea she got out of a magazine). Perhaps I'll get a photo of it for my blog when she's finished. And I got to sneak some more time online until the next round of fireworks calls me away.
It can be addictive to get sucked into this "blogosphere" that is real in a cozy, satisfying way. It's a delightful place to be if you choose the right places to visit. But we have to remember that we "visit" our friends; we "live" with our family. I think that's the separation.
It's just sad that some people don't see the treasure in these online communities but I think it's because everyone (Internet users and non-users) has heard the horror stories of the Internet, only the *users* know the blessings.
There was a one, too-brief, loving moment when my dh walked over to me tonight, drew his jacket around the two of us and nuzzled a kiss on my neck. There are 1440 minutes in every day. For a very brief minute in this time capsule (a never to be repeated minute) we shared a hug and a joined sigh of thankfulness. We both glanced up at one of the fireworks bursting overhead as the children shouted for our attention and I made some lame comment about us fixing to see another new year together. Dh just nodded his head. "We have each other and our health. What more can we ask for?"
Why do I share something so personal? Because of recent events such as this one. Visitation is tomorrow. Funeral is Tuesday. I couldn't help but think of Tina tonight in a lonely bed having to listen to all the fireworks heralding in a new year...a year for her and her children which will be so dog-gone different from the year she anticipated.  A year none of us would wish to anticipate.
Are we living life? Or are we just sitting here watching other people live their lives? I do believe we can do both. I believe we can live both and enjoy both. I really do. Just remember to put aside the good when the best calls you.
__________________
Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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Dawnie
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Cay Gibson wrote:
Are we living life? Or are we just sitting here watching other people live their lives? I do believe we can do both. I believe we can live both and enjoy both. I really do. Just remember to put aside the good when the best calls you.
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Well said, Cay. I think I'm going to post this quote on my computer!
Dawn
__________________
Mom to Mary Beth (99), Anna (02), Lucia (04), Clara (06), and Adelaide Victoria (2/28/09)
Visit my blog!Water Into Wine:Vino Per Tutto!
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Cay Gibson
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Dawnie wrote:
Cay Gibson wrote:
Are we living life? Or are we just sitting here watching other people live their lives? I do believe we can do both. I believe we can live both and enjoy both. I really do. Just remember to put aside the good when the best calls you.
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Well said, Cay. I think I'm going to post this quote on my computer!
Dawn |
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Thank you, Dawn.
But give Elizabeth credit for the last line. It's just a different take from something she's been saying for years.
__________________
Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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MarilynW
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I am fairly new to forums, email lists and blogs. And these have been a real blessing. I have learned so much from so many of you and have been so moved by the many prayers and responses to requests for prayers and advice.
My kids and husband chuckle at me - because I am always praying for one or more of my "friends" (whom I have never met!) or saying things like "my friend Sarah said..." or I learned this from my friend Katherine...
But I also feel kind of sad too when I go on the forums (those first trimester hormones again?!) - sad that I seem to have more online "friends" then IRL ones close to me. Most of my friends are miles/states/continents away, and I see them rarely. I have lots and lots of good acquaintances locally - but few close friends. All of you were the first people (apart from immediate family) that I shared the momentous news of our new baby with. I do not really talk to anyone else about not finding support with my extended family and the pain from this.
I find that at this stage of my life it is more difficult to make close friends - as all of us mothers are so busy with raising our kids, homeschooling, keeping our homes. And although I am very happy doing this (and am not a social butterfly) - I wish sometimes that I had some "kindred spirit" friends like you who could just come over for a cup of tea, or who I could appoint godparents, or leave my kids with should I go into labor in the middle of the night... I look with a certain amount of wistfulness (envy?) at those of you who have known each other for years and know each other so well...
Anyway...enough melancholy on New Years Eve - off to finish watching "While You Were Sleeping" with everyone...
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Marilyn
Blessed with 6 gifts from God
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insegnante
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JennGM wrote:
| But another aspect, at least having little ones, it's hard to be yourself and really have a good one-on-one conversation when you have younger aged children. I can't tell you how many times even with my sisters that we don't get to REALLY talk or catch up when we get together. We're enjoying the moment, but we're sharing in watching our children who can distract and take away from the deep thoughts you would LIKE to share. |
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I have a mom-friend who lives about two minutes away by car, ten or fifteen minutes walking distance, whom I met through an in-person group. In spite of the geographical proximity, much if not most of our really getting to know each other happened via e-mail for exactly the reason above. She isn't even someone who reads blogs or message boards, but e-mail was an important supplement to developing our in-person friendship.
I am also very shy, and slow and clumsy when I have to be keeping after my kids (mostly because of the 2-year-old these days.) I don't drive, which is very limiting in suburban Northern Virginia, and I don't see that changing very soon. I think online "friendship" has to happen on its own when people just "click," and I'm not very active on any boards right now. But if I did come upon a potential real-life friend online it might be a lot easier for us to recognize each other that way than through the limited interactions I have with other mothers in person right now.
Theresa
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ladybugs
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JennGM wrote:
So some ways this is 4REAL? How about the outpouring of prayers for others? And charity, such as Donna's tree ornaments? The books sent to Jennifer (JSchaaf) after she lost everything in Katrina? Financial help for some other members?
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"Last year, we endured a year of my husband being laid-off for the second time in 3 years. We were at the point where our savings were gone, our 401K's gone...there was nothing else....
I posted about how were we to eat and pay bills....for me, it was venting a concern than a plea for help, but that community took it further....
So, if these online communities aren't real friendships, then where in the world did we get the $1500.00 in the mail?"
That's what I wrote to Danielle!
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Love and God Bless,
Maria P
My etsy store - all proceeds go to help my fencing daughters!
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Chari
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WJFR wrote:
| I really believe the internet saved Aidan's life! |
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WOW, some of the most beautiful posts I have ever read on this board are on this thread.
My first reaction was "of course they are real! I have stayed with lots of CCM & 4reallers over the last 7years......they are VERY real"
reading the quote above reminded me of one of the most important REAL thing I have found on this internet:
my IRL friendship with Willa, due to the fact that Aidan was ill, of all circumstances.....we had so much in common, and still do.....our kids have even stayed in the same room at UCSF hospital (at different times)
....how many time have we stayed up WAY too late chatting our imaginary conversations.
....our dds traveled alone together (ha...to a very REAL wedding of a CCM homeschooler, of course! and stayed with our 4real friends!)
.....we share books, and sometimes even children....
...and, together we even organized a westcoast camping trip for ccmers, reservations for our SIXTH year are made! Now, how cool is THAT!!
....in looking at my top best friends list currently.....I find 6 of them I met through CCM......one I met at the lake......she is a CCMer, too.........WAY TO GO Elizabeth and Michele (ah, here she goes again, thanking us......yeah, at least once a year...and why not on new year's eve......Father exhorted us this am to remember to give God thanks today )....
I am rambling......
anyway, the bottom line: THIS IS REAL!
And, I could never have managed these past 7 years without CCM or 4real......I am too isolated. God sent me this group for a reason.
And, for that I say: DEO GRATIAS!
__________________
Chari...Take Up & Read
Dh Marty 27yrs...3 lovely maidens: Anne 24, Sarah 20 & Maddelyn 17 and 3 chivalrous sons: Matthew 22, Garrett 16 & Malachy 11
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Martha
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| Posted: Jan 01 2007 at 11:30am | IP Logged
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alicegunther wrote:
| even if a blog presents a mother's ideal rather than a whole picture, in seeing the ideal, we look into her heart, into her dearest hopes for her home and family. That in itself provides insight and truth, and, if anything, may be a quicker way to know someone than a talk over coffee at a homeschool gathering. |
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Beautifully worded Alice, as always!
I think we all can have a tendancy to be a bit too cynical. (Or maybe that's just me!  ) Yes, there are some people out there that should worry us. There are liars and cheaters and hurters and users.
BUT I believe that most people are not like that. I think that's why most of those people you mention, Alice, aren't too off the mark from their blog. Relationships do entail at some point a level of risk. It's always a risk to get to know someone on a personal level. It's always a risk to let others know us on personal level.
No, it's not wise to risk without caution. But I certainly think it equally unwise to refuse to risk at all. Or to think that a IRL risk is somehow less of a risk than on-line.
Also, like some of you... My blog isn't just visited by strangers. There are people who visit my blog that I've known for years. It's been wonderful to reconnect or stay connected.
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Martha
mama to 7 boys & 4 girls
Yes, they're all ours!
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Taffy
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| Posted: Jan 01 2007 at 12:35pm | IP Logged
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I agree with most of the sentiments already expressed here but wanted to present a different side to this topic if I may...
There are a whole community of people who find face to face communication not only inefficient but down right impossible! As Elizabeth already mentioned, she's quite shy and has a hard time being open with new people in person. So, yes, the internet is valuable in those instances. But what about people who find verbal communication physically difficult? I'm thinking, here, of people who are muted by various disabilities. For instance, most people with cerebral palsy are of average to high intelligence. However, when meeting someone who they don't know well, they can have a hard time making themselves understood and often appear to be unable to understand the conversation. By going online, they are, in a way, freed from their disabilities and able to relate to others without it "getting in the way".
Just another facet to this question...
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Susan
Mom to 5 on earth and 1 in heaven
Susan's Soliloquy
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Willa
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| Posted: Jan 01 2007 at 12:43pm | IP Logged
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Taffy wrote:
| But what about people who find verbal communication physically difficult? I'm thinking, here, of people who are muted by various disabilities.....By going online, they are, in a way, freed from their disabilities and able to relate to others without it "getting in the way".Just another facet to this question... |
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So very true, Taffy! I thought of that aspect but was still struggling to put it in words. But you said it for me. That's a case in point: I personally can often struggle to put things into words until the IRL conversation has LONG since flowed past. But virtual conversations move slower and that lets me participate so much better. Plus, I can ponder and reframe what I want to say. IRL I often hesitate because when I'm rushed or embarrassed I sometimes say things that I don't really intend to say and that don't completely represent what I WANT to say.
Plus my family is constrained by logistics -- we live far away from "real" modes of communication and our finances, medical circumstances and other features make it difficult for us to get out and about very often. The internet has filled in so many gaps for us -- information and communication and even spiritual. I admit there could be drawbacks too but that's true with EVERYTHING.
What is "real" -- is it ONLY in "real life" that we can make ourselves truly known? Aren't there things that aren't essential aspects of ourselves, that get in the way of who we "really" are in real life -- whether we have a weight issue, or a stammer, or social anxiety, or some significant physical or cognitive difference? These things can give people a false impression of who we REALLY are inside.
I think options and possibilities make life richer, and I usually do not trust points of views that try to limit or exclude things that God has not limited or excluded. So I was immediately distrustful of the original article that Danielle referred to -- I think it's fine for people to express opinions but I usually dislike "exclusionary" opinions -- things that limit or constrict human choices rather than expand them. I don't mind cautionary viewpoints but I hate to see the baby tossed out with the bathwater. I don't think it's right to make constrictive judgements that apply generally, when the Church has not done so (I do think it's FINE to make personal constrictive judgements -- everyone is free to decide for themselves to what extent they want to use the internet, use co-ops, use correspondence schools -- or not, depending on their own life situation and applied judgement).
Just some things I've been thinking about. I hope it doesn't sound like a rant!
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AMDG
Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
Take Up and Read
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Are online communities 4real?
