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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star


Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 8:44am | IP Logged
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Hello,
I had read the many posts that were written with regards to Elisabeth's son and once again I thought hmmmm....
I have waited with our son. I have gone back and forth between thinking "It is nothing, just maturity", to feeling real guilt that maybe it is my teaching, to finally realising (through reading the many great, supportive posts here) that it could be very helpful to find out if there are some learning or processing difficulties.
We live in Canada, in Winnipeg, so I do not know what is out there as far as testing goes (most of you seem to be from across the border!)
Could I give you a few of my observations? Any feedback would be so appreciated and might help me know where to start!!
Since he was a young guy, 4yo, he has had various motor tics. From shoulder shrugging, to even a few vocal tics as a very young guy. Right now he has a tic that involves squinting, blinking, and sticking his tongue out too. My brother gets tics, and they are very persistant, but my son Ariel's are much more pronounced at times. He hasn't had one for almost two years at this point, and we see they can be linked to stress, being knitpicked, lack of sleep among other things.
Another thing is that this son has a very hard time remembering names. Ariel will forget his uncle's names for periods and often gets their name's wrong on the first try, than will either correct himself or I will. This carries on to his friends names, either forgetting them completely or saying the wrong one first. I have been called Papa for years, and then he changes it to Mama. Often when he is asked a question we get a few whats? right off. Like it is taking time for it to process in his head. He seems to have a hard time making connections at times, and his ability to narrate, or express his feelings is very difficult for him. An example from last week was when he was trying to find a book. He had an extremely hard time explaining what book, and the description he gave me so I would know was very misleading, and so often I find that I am guessing, guessing at what he is saying and saying many leading questions. I worry that sure I can do this, but others will not, and it might not be helping him.
This son has always been a slow maturer, from sitting as a baby, teeth, speaking etc. But as his sister grows (two and a half years younger), and goes past him in maturity in many areas, I have begun to worry alot. He generally plays with children a few years younger and feels more comfortable but even then can behave very immaturely. His speech, though he uses a very large and varied vocabulary, is still sort of sing songy and he can have a difficult time in discussions, often when we are talking to adults he can say things totally unrelated to try to join the conversation.
Spelling is a huge issue here, although we have mostly done dictation ( I have thought it would be gotten through osmosis, but it is becoming clear that this is maybe not a good route). He is doing well with math, but I know in the classroom he would probably flounder as I give him many reminders and topics often need alot of review and explanation. He is an avid reader, reading Redwall, Treasure Island, etc in one day. He often reads 6-7 large novels a week. But when I ask him what he is reading about it is often very difficult for him to explain it to me. Sometimes he comes to tell me about a scene he loves in a book he reads, or after we watch a movie together, but it is the exception.
Ariel is very sweet, sensitive ( too sensitive at times), and always has been very obediant. Unfortunately, because of some of the above things, added to that that even getting ready in the morning I often have to remind about something, and that his next in line is extremely quick, verbal, and social, he has often gotten my frustratioin (cry.......). I often think, wow I have this awesome chance at home to be this guys biggest fan but sometimes I am so frustrated and I think I am giving him all the wrong signs (cry more..).
This has been so long, and I hope it does not come through as a huge complaint.......for it isn't.
Thank you so much in advance........any comments??
Kristie
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star


Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1508
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 8:50am | IP Logged
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I also forgot to mention that even though he is such an avid reader, the reading outloud by him is an issue. As parents we have read reams and reams to this child. And he is never happier than in the library. Mostly fiction/fantasy, and much historical fiction, and much myth right now!!
We have done tons of history here. But for Ariel, it is very hard to judge retention (which I don't consider the main thing ....he loves history!!) he often forgets much of what we learn about, some of this due I think to the lack of being able to learn names.
Thanks again,
Kristie
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Elizabeth Founder

Real Learning
Joined: Jan 20 2005 Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline Posts: 5595
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 12:02pm | IP Logged
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Kristie,
How old is he now?
__________________ Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star


Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1508
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 2:20pm | IP Logged
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Sorry.... in all that I failed to tell you his age. He is 11 years old now.
Kristie
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bubbelcat Forum Rookie

Joined: July 21 2006
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 2:52pm | IP Logged
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Kristie,
I have a very strong "information gathering" personality type so whenever the opportunity to evaluate my son is available I jump on it.
I'm not big into labeling because I think that each "disability" brings special, often unrecognized, gifts as well and I am adamant that my child will not be defined by what he can't do. He is more than the sum of his disabilities!
That being said, if it were I, I would definitely have him evaluated with a full psycho-educational work up. By age 11 many of the vast degrees of "normal" seen in the younger years have narrowed so it is easier to separate maturity from ability. An objective evaluator can be a blessing. BUT please choose your evaluator very carefully! Many come right out of the public schools and are not very supportive of homeschooling under most circumstances. Talk with other homeschoolers in your area who have had evaluations done and see what they liked and didn't like about their evaluators.
Also research psycho-educational evaluations so you can ask questions about what tests they will administer and why. Not all evaluations are created equal.
Next talk to family members about their educational experiences. Learning disabilities often run in families and many are not recognized until you start asking questions. Then it comes out that "Uncle Johnny had a hard time reading", or "Aunt Susie could never sit still".
Lastly do some investigating on your own as to possible causes of your son's tics and other issues. The more you know about potential diagnoses the more you'll be able to question the evaluator to make sure you all are on the right track.
Hope some of that helps.
Blessings,
Becky
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star


Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1508
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Posted: Aug 11 2006 at 12:19pm | IP Logged
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Thanks Becky,
We are getting on the right track here...thanks for the wisdom
Kristie
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