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Kathryn
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| Posted: Jan 04 2011 at 12:47pm | IP Logged
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My son is a challenge. He is most likely ADD as well as having a very difficult time with traditional learning.
This is the reason I even started the homeschooling venture. I love the homeschooling idea in theory but in practical day-to-day application, I am struggling.
My current struggles are:
1) He can only work in short bits of time so we never can schedule a "block of time" for school and then BE DONE. I'm constantly going back and forth betw. him and everyone else and the lines betw. school and home and chores are creating constant mayhem around here. I rarely feel a sense of peace about anything.
2) What can he "do" with his non-school time? He needs to do something besides aggravate me or his siblings and usu. the only way that happens is if he's in front of the tv or his Nintendo. Not the best use of life in my opinion.
There's prob. so much more to this post I could write but time's limited. Thanks for any advice.
ETA: I guess I'm wondering too what your kids do w/ their time when they're done w/ school work. Since they would normally be in school 7 hrs a day and school can easily take only 2-3 hrs, how do you fill all that other time for your children? I feel like I'm constantly having to be their "cruise director".
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: Jan 04 2011 at 1:01pm | IP Logged
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Kathryn,
I totally understand. Dd is the same way. I have a hard time keeping her occupied. I posted a question similar to yours a few months ago and received some good ideas. I'll see if I can find it and post it on this thread--may take me awhile 
The big thing I have found is she needs to be WITH us(if she isn't watching videos)working on something, and that can be somewhat disruptive. It is getting better though. An activity with us at the table and working WITH her to keep her voice down, and try to settle down, and concentrate on her "task."
Also, we try to "air" her out a few times a day--quick burst of play outside or even laps in the house, or an active game, followed by concentrated activity. It is exhausting but worth it. Ds enjoys the breaks too!!
Hope that helps--and I'll be back to get my info myself...
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Anne, married to dh 16 years!, ds,(97), Little One (02), and dd (02).
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: Jan 04 2011 at 1:05pm | IP Logged
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Don't know how to link but look under Early Learning-Help with bored 8 year old 
There are some great suggestions for activities....
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Anne, married to dh 16 years!, ds,(97), Little One (02), and dd (02).
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Kathryn
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| Posted: Jan 04 2011 at 1:31pm | IP Logged
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I found it. Thanks! There are a couple of things but as you know, the problem is long-term I feel like I'm *CONSTANTLY* having to give him something to do and nothing lasts very long. It's almost like my time is consumed with finding activities, implementing activities and supervising activities...just for him! It is exhausting when I have a 3 month old, energetic 3 year old and an 11 year old to occupy and plan for as well. He exhausts me in so many ways. 
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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Kathryn
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| Posted: Jan 04 2011 at 1:37pm | IP Logged
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Here's another example...I told him he could go ride his bike outside and that lasted for about 5 min. He *LOVES* to ride his bike...with other people. He's very social and so he doesn't like doing stuff alone but the dynamics and personalities of him having someone w/ him doesn't always work.
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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hmbress
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| Posted: Jan 06 2011 at 12:27pm | IP Logged
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My 7yo is very good about occupying his time, for which I am very thankful! Generally if it's not reading, it's building with Legos or other types of blocks, playing outside, or doing puzzles and mazes. However, on those occasions when he does tell me he's bored, I offer him some extra chores to do, and he quickly decides he can find something to do after all.
I don't know if that would work for your son though. Good luck!
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Heather Rose (ds13, ds10)
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cathhomeschool
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| Posted: Jan 06 2011 at 1:12pm | IP Logged
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hmbress wrote:
| However, on those occasions when he does tell me he's bored, I offer him some extra chores to do, and he quickly decides he can find something to do after all. |
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This is exactly what I do with my son who craves entertainment. He does not do well on his own but the threat of chores usually solves the problem. Sometimes I even tell him that I am busy (doing X chore) but that if he'll help me so I can finish faster, I can play X with him after. Usually he opts to entertain himself instead.
When mine get disruptive inside when others are trying to focus on work, I send them outside and don't let them come in until the wiggles are worked out.
Do you have a mini trampoline that could burn some of your son's energy?
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Janette (4 boys - 22, 21, 15, 14)
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 06 2011 at 2:15pm | IP Logged
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oh and a timer is your friend.. you start by letting him know that he has to keep himself occupied (playing outside or in his room for instance) until the timer dings.. and keep it a short consistent time.. like 10 minutes.. and then when he makes it to the "ding" you stop an give him some full attention maybe asking him about the things he did on his own.. this also will help him want to do things worth telling about.. then after he's consistently able to manage the 10 minutes.. you can up the time by a bit and get him used to that etc.. until you're up to a reasonable time frame for him to keep himself occupied.
When you start this out you may need to give him several things he can do during that time. You have 10 minutes that you need to spend in your room. You might try playing with legos or putting together a puzzle.
The tv and the nintendo are actually part of this problem.. they are constantly changing and stimulating and basically giving him the appetite that he has to have the stimulation to be entertained.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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drmommy
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| Posted: Jan 07 2011 at 8:22am | IP Logged
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My daughter has ADHD which is one of the signs of her diagnosis (Worster-Drought Syndrome). She is super active! So, I do homeschool her in chunks of time. We do math, then she plays or does a chore I give her, then we read and answer questions, then she has a break, etc. So her lessons are staggered throughout the day. When she gets too hyper, I tell her to go organize the pantry, or sweep the kitchen floor. She is a willing helper, but MUST be kept busy all the time. Her reward is being able to lug her doll house out into the living area so she can play and still be with us, as she does not like to be alone. I try to be thankful that she DOES move (she had a stroke in utero also, and was paralyzed on her left side for quite a while), and work with the activity level! My older children help a LOT to help entertain her and keep her busy too. When the older children are working, that is the best time to work with her also, as she will imitate them.
I don't know if I could give any other advice. I don't medicate my daughter, so I am constantly trying to come up with new ways also to keep her busy.
Bridget
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Becky Parker
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| Posted: Jan 08 2011 at 5:41am | IP Logged
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My son has ADHD and workboxes have been a huge help. You could fill them with not only his school subjects, but free time activities as well.
I am also reminded of Maria Montesorri's "normalization" theory. I never liked the word, because I felt like it made my son, who couldn't focus for long on anything, sound abnormal. But one thing I learned is that when my son was able to concentrate on something for a period of time, he did calm down some. The use of a timer, as Jodie mentioned, is good for this. Putting an activity that he might like, like Legos, in a workbox along with a timer is a good idea. Explain that he must work with the Legos for the allotted time - say 15-20 minutes. This will help him build his power of concentration and hopefully, it will carry over into other things. This might take some getting used to. He may complain that he doesn't know what to build or whatever, but I think, if you stick to it, he will eventually settle in. You might even try starting with 10 minutes if you feel that 15 will not be possible for him. (I just want to add here that I am not a MM expert. This is just one of her theories that I tried and saw that it really made a difference around here.)
I have also found that when I do this with all my kids, they realize they want to stay with an activity longer. For example, we have outside time everyday. The kids must stay out for 20 minutes (unless the weather is bad.) They usually don't want to go because if given a choice, the Wii or computer is what they would choose every time. However, knowing it's only 20 minutes helps. What I usually find, is after 20 minutes they have finally settled into some sort of game or activity and they don't want to come in! They just need the time to get involved with something.
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Becky
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4Real Forums : Special Blessings
Topic: Occupying a child's time
