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Taffy
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| Posted: June 18 2008 at 7:54pm | IP Logged
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Does anyone here have a success story with homeschooling their autistic child? Not Aspergers but autistic?
My son still can't function well in the "real world". He is so restricted by his sensory issues (oversensitive hearing), special diet, poor communication skills. I know he tries so hard and I get so tired.
I'm tired of him not understanding. I'm tired of him getting so fixated on things that he can't move on. I'm tired of his being so isolated from his peers. I'm tired of others ignoring him or treating him as if he's stupid.
I wish that he could at least carry and follow a conversation well. And that he wouldn't scream when we are around a lot of kids.  At least then he could find some peace by pursuing his interests. But he doesn't.
Sorry for the pity party. It's not all bad, I know, but I'm having a real hard time seeing the positive right now.
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Susan
Mom to 5 on earth and 1 in heaven
Susan's Soliloquy
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folklaur
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| Posted: June 18 2008 at 9:00pm | IP Logged
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I'm sorry you are feeling so badly.
I do know a mom back in AZ, she has three children that she is homeschooling and the oldest of these is her son who is autistic (not asperger's, but full-blown autisim.) He is about 11 or 12, I think. She also has two younger nt ones (ds8 and dd7). I could try and get you guys in contact if you want?
hugs and prayers,
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KC in TX
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| Posted: June 18 2008 at 10:05pm | IP Logged
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Susan,
Big hugs, dear. My son is a bit more high functioning, but he is autistic and not aspergers. I feel the same way. I wonder if he will ever be able to comprehend something he reads. I wonder if he'll hold conversations with people that don't revolve around what his current interest is (for instance, always asking everyone which Veggie Tales DVDs they own). Some of his peers in our homeschool group ignore him. Completely. One kid won't even answer him when LB calls the kid's name.
It breaks my heart. I don't have any advice, just some company in what you're feeling. My son is 9, how old is yours?
__________________
KC,
wife to Ben (10/94),
Mama to LB ('98)
Michaela ('01)
Emma ('03)
Jordan ('05)
And, my 2 angels, Rose ('08) and Mark ('09)
The Cabbage Patch
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JuliaT
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| Posted: June 19 2008 at 1:51pm | IP Logged
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Susan, I wish that I could give you words of advice as you have done for me on many occasions. All I feel fit to do right now is give you (((big hugs))). I am so sorry that you are feeling this right now. Motherhood is such a great gift but it can also cause some hurt.
Praying for you,
Julia
mom of 3 (9,7,5)
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mom3aut1not
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| Posted: June 19 2008 at 8:43pm | IP Logged
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Susan,
I have a pddnos 22 yo dd and a full-blown autistic 20 yo dd as well as a fully autistic 8 yo ds. The two older ones have graduated from high school. (The 22 yo has an associates degree as well and has just started a part-time job.) It did take extra time for both girls. (The 20 yo dd just graduated. Last weekend was her high school graduation ceremony.) I am uncertain about the 20 yo's ability to take college classes so she will audit classes to see how it goes. She also wants to get a job, but we'll have to find her niche. I do worry, but I also know she wants independence; she has learned to do her own laundry and cooking. Otoh, she has recently had trouble understanding some basic issues about cleanliness. She seems to be doing better with that, but I never know what will pop up next. She also can't drive safely imo so I forsee her living with us for the forseeble future. I don't mind; she doesn't ask for much, and she is willing to help around the house.
Have you looked at Jed Baker's books for older auties? (I used much of these as a speech half-credit for high school.)
Social Skills Picture Book for High School and Beyond
Preparing for Life: The Complete Guide for Transitioning to Adulthood for Those with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome
A bit of hope for you -- a lot of auties go through a sort of developmental bump in their twenties. Maybe things will settle down in the future.
HTH!
In Christ,
Deborah
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Taffy
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| Posted: June 21 2008 at 1:09pm | IP Logged
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Thanks you so much for your words of empathy and encouragement! I really do appreciate them! I just haven't been able to get on the computer for any length of time so that I could let you know sooner!
Laura, thanks for the offer of putting me in touch with your friend. I'm going to decline it but I'm so glad you asked!
KC, thank you, I thought you might relate. My son is 11. Isn't it awful how other children will simply ignore our special little guys? It absolutely breaks mine each and every single time. I never really understood before having children how much my heart would hurt when things like this happen. Now I really do. It really is like my children have my heart in their hands and whenever someone hurts them, in any way, they may as well have taken my heart and broken it into pieces. I'm going to pray that your son will find someone who'll love to hang out with him because they think he's fun to be with - and that it's nice to be with someone who enjoys VeggieTales as much as they do! 
Julia, thanks for the hugs. I can always use them!
Deborah, I'm so glad you shared how your oldest two are doing. I always look forward to reading your posts because you've been where I am and I know that I'll learn something from you. I'm definitely going to check out those resources.
I'm feeling better about things now. When I wrote my initial post, I was seeing how much more work we need to do to help my ds and how much I've failed him in so many ways. I've been going through Elizabeth's book study on Charlotte Mason and it really highlighted some areas that need a lot of improving around here. DH and I had also been having some heated discussions on some changes that I need to make. He's right but sometimes it is hard to acknowledge the ugly truths about oneself.
Autism is a funny thing right now in that the levels of abilities and disabilities are so varied among affected individuals yet the label remains the same. It can be really hard to hear success stories when we've tried the same thing to be met with failure.
But, I've also got to remember that he's making great strides that simply wouldn't have happened had we not pulled him out of school. While my son is still not conversational, he can talk. He can enjoy stories and retells them to himself with accompanying actions from his "action figures" (they're not dolls if you're a boy). He's still at the Robert Munsch level of understanding, but it is improving. He is a talented musician with a strong ear. He's very creative. He's been driving me crazy with "Knock Knock" jokes lately and his delivery is improving a lot - he obviously has a sense of humour and is learning to express it. He's actually coming up to share information with me and others now. He really is making progress.
I guess that this makes it harder when I see him regress again. When he gets anxious and is unable to answer a math question after I just told him the answer and it's staring him in the face. When he runs across a crowded McDonald's to grab someone's Happy Meal toy to look at it. When he was 3, it wasn't a big deal. When he's 11, it's downright embarrassing!
Anyway, enough of the pity party! Thank you so much for being here and sharing your experiences. I learn so much when I come here. 
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Susan
Mom to 5 on earth and 1 in heaven
Susan's Soliloquy
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momtimesfour
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| Posted: June 23 2008 at 6:30pm | IP Logged
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I haven't experienced this myself, but I do have an acquaintance who has. I think she has 5 or 6 children and she is such an amazing person! Oh, wow. Her youngest child is autistic and they chose to homeschool him. His doctors have said that she should keep doing whatever it is she's doing - he's made so much more progress than anyone dared to think possible. The last time I saw him, he was functioning at about a 7yo level? No one thought he'd get to a 4yo level, let alone 7yo - it's a huge, huge difference. He's really a sweet kid.
I'll just be a cheerleader and pray for the Lord's grace to be bountiful.
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~Lucy,
wife for 15 years,
mom to four blessings (ds13, ds7, ds3, dd1)
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trish
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| Posted: Sept 19 2008 at 12:04am | IP Logged
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mom3aut1not wrote:
Have you looked at Jed Baker's books for older auties? (I used much of these as a speech half-credit for high school.)
Social Skills Picture Book for High School and Beyond
Preparing for Life: The Complete Guide for Transitioning to Adulthood for Those with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome
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This looks like something I need to look into. Thanks for posting this. My ds 18 has aspergers.
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~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
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4Real Forums : Special Blessings
Topic: Feeling Hopeless...
