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Becky Parker
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Joined: May 23 2005
Location: Michigan
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| Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 6:52am | IP Logged
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We are members of HSLDA and I really appreciate all that they do. However, Dawn's "Please Ease My Mind" post and Jen's reply has me wondering. It seems that HSLDA's usual response to a social worker, school official or whomever coming to the door is "DON'T let them in!". But sometimes I honestly wonder if letting them in, showing them the kid's school stuff and telling them about all that we do as homeschoolers wouldn't be a better approach. After all, we're not doing anything illegal. Doesn't is cause more suspicion to tell them they can't come in or that you will not talk to them without consulting with your lawyer first? I just wonder if it wouldn't be more effective to say "sure, come on in. Can I get you a cup of tea? Let me start with this huge file of all the kids science activities. From there we can move on to history and math. This shouldn't take but 5-6 hours." 
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Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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Dawn
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| Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 7:30am | IP Logged
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Becky Parker wrote:
| But sometimes I honestly wonder if letting them in, showing them the kid's school stuff and telling them about all that we do as homeschoolers wouldn't be a better approach. After all, we're not doing anything illegal. Doesn't is cause more suspicion to tell them they can't come in or that you will not talk to them without consulting with your lawyer first? |
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Becky, I've wondered the same thing myself. It would be my instinctive reaction to say, please come in, have a cup of tea and let's chat.  As I did with my neighbor when she stopped by the next day. I wanted her to know us, and see for herself how sociable and happy my boys are.
The first year we homeschooled, we did get a call from the school principal requesting a meeting. I contacted HSLDA for advice and they advised me not to go - a face to face meeting is not a requirement and it would set a precedent. We did go, however, feeling as you do, that it would arouse suspicion *not* to go ... and the meeting went great. They loved our plans and were very nice. We've never had a request for anything other than our ed. plan every year since.
I think the fear is that, as Lisa described, you never know who the person is - where they are coming from. They could be someone from a large family or someone who knows homeschoolers, who thinks art supplies and books all over is a sign of a busy happy family - or it could be someone with no concept of homeschool life who sees "mess" and thinks "neglect." 
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Dawn, mum to 3 boys 
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Lisbet
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| Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 7:41am | IP Logged
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Becky, It's a matter of protecting our 4th amendment right. It could be a slippery slope if we all just let social workers in willy nilly with no good cause. It is totally unjust for someone able to call CPS annonomysly, fabricate some crazy story or cause, and wreak havoc on your family, all just because the annonomys caller dislikes homeschooling, or firmly feels that having more than 2 children is abusive on the rest of them, etc...
ALSO, keep in my how much personal discretion social workers have. We were blessed in our case, that she was a fairly conservative minded, loved big famililies, etc... It really scares me to think what could have happened if she would've have come with personal baggage against the Church, big families, intact homes, etc... OR if she was some kind of raving feminist or something. With the annonomys tip line, it's almost like we are considered guilty until proven innocent, and that is simply NOT right. I shouldn't have had to have her come into my home to 'prove' that we were doing nothing wrong, just because our neighbor dislikes homeschooling and our large family. It just a slippery slope, and we never know on a case by case basis just how it would turn out.
If I had it to do all over again, even though she was a nice social worker, I would NOT have allowed her in my home. I would have demanded a warrent before letting anyone in. Contacted our lawyer or HSLDA and have them deal with it from there. I would not take that kind of risk again.
Do you get the Homecourt Report? It boggles my mind the cases open with CPS against homeschoolers and big families. It amazes me how many times I've read a neighbor has called because they saw the 2 year old naked in the backyard, or the toys have been left on the lawn for a few days. OR how often it is in laws that call because they dislike homeschooling etc... We should not have to open our homes, be imposed upon, have our children frightened, just because someone else is making a judgement against us.
When you are considered countercultural, when you are living your life in a way that many people feel is weird, well, it's nerve wracking and frightening to have the State involved in your home. To have someone come in and evaluate if your lifestyle is "okay". It's just wrong. Wrong. The state has NO business deciding that. They have no right. I don't need nor want their stamp of approval on how I am educating and raising my family.
.............sorry, end of rant. This whole issues is a very sensitive one for me.
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Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Question about HSLDA
