4Real Forums: Moving

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Topic: Moving

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Essy
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Joined: Oct 12 2006
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Posts: 167

Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 9:22am \| IP Logged

Any suggestions on how to make this whole process (selling our house, house hunting, moving)easier for young children. My dd is 4 and not taking it very well. We are only in the house hunting phase of it, and she's ok with looking but doesn't want to move to a new house...she just cries and cries when we bring it up. She's a very sensitive child and I worry about how all of this will affect her.

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Wife to Roy since Sept 1985
Mom to Sarah(May 2002)and Christian (August 2003)
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Katie
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Joined: March 11 2005
Location: Suriname
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Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 9:48am \| IP Logged

Essy,

Your daughter sounds so sweet. I think four is a difficult age in that they understand enough but are still so young and it can be very confusing. I would talk, talk, talk, and try and get to the root of some of her fears. Is she worried that she won't have her toys, her bed? Talk about when you moved as a child and how exciting it was. You'll have to gauge whether it is better to include her in the process as much as possible or shield her from it - different children will be encouraged by the house-hunting and others more traumatized. I'm trying to think of any picture books that incorporate moving as a fun, exciting experience but I'm drawing a blank.

On a practical level, we always try and have the kids' rooms put together the first night so that there is some familiarity there. We often end with a pile of children in our bed, though! We have done fun things like eat icecream for dinner so that the kids are a bit giddy and not sad. And when the "I miss ...." tears inevitably flow, I try and be sympathetic and allow them time to process.

It will be okay, but it is hard, isn't it?

Prayers for you and yours.

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Mother of 5 in South America. No 6 due in April.

teachingmyown
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Joined: Feb 20 2005
Location: Virginia
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Posts: 5128

Posted: Dec 18 2006 at 9:57am \| IP Logged

When you find the right house, show her "her" room. Maybe ask her what color she wants it and any little improvements she would like to make to it.

My daughters were crushed because we didn't buy the house with the pink bedroom.

I said we could paint the room in the house we chose pink. Of course, a year later I haven't gotten to it.

Good luck!

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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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Erin
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Joined: Feb 23 2005
Location: Australia
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Posts: 5814

Posted: Dec 19 2006 at 10:26pm \| IP Logged

Essy

We have just moved this week!! Actually I've started blogging all the dramas.

Anyhow our dd5 was NOT HAPPY either. When we found the property she did nothing but fight and scream for three weeks after we told her it was happening. FOr the first time I really started doubting myself

Probably the worst three weeks I have experienced in a long time. I think the problem was also that at that time she was covered in excema, anyhow just to let you know that it did improve we just had to live with her

Not helping am I? But the good news is she is happy now that we are here!!

with our dd's personality in the end we just perservered and tried not to talk about it much in front of her, we gave up trying to and make dd happy about it and I tried to make life as normal as possible.

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Erin
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