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Nurturing the Years of Wonder
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Kristin
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Posted: July 12 2006 at 10:58pm | IP Logged Quote Kristin

Well, ladies - I don't even know where to start with this post! After browsing the forum briefly it has become clear that you all are a wealth of wisdom and knowledge as well as practical experience! What a blessing to have each other as a resource!!!

As for my limited background, I have read many, many books on the Montessori philosophy and method and have fallen in love with it. Last year I started to daunting task of creating a Montessori-at-home environment and while I know that I've made tremendous strides, I am daily humbled by the challenges therein.

My question for you ladies is about the "normalised" child. I did read the tread on how Montessori children differ from non and found it very interesting and useful ... but still, can you tell me, in the case of normalised children, do they ever run around and take pleasure in just making noise or making a big mess (in particular, boys)? Or is this, as I fear, the result of the environment?

Our son (three) does very well with the Montessori materials in our school cabinet (he loves them) and does fit many of the characteristics described in the aforementioned thread (he is often dubbed shy in new situations and does tend towards purposeful play). It's in the channeling of his energy day in and day out that I'm finding it hard to keep up with providing self-directed purposeful play opportunities. I'm trying to keep things simple and orderly (man is it hard) --- and rotate them out (our storage room is totally orderly one month and the next a complete wreck because I can't keep on top of it --- How do you store the miscellaneous trays, baskets and boxes in limited space?) ...

I do know whether I need to try to steer him away from some of the more rambunctious behavior that in my pre-Montessori days never would have phased me (it seems such a natural thing, but maybe it's really not)! Also, I'm having a hard time making the leap away from pretend play", which I grew up with and view as part of childhood, yet has no place in the Montessori approach (as far as I understand it). Any insights on any of this would be very much appreciated!

God bless!
Kristin
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Becky Parker
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 6:52am | IP Logged Quote Becky Parker

Kristen,
I wish I could remember the source for this but I read *somewhere* that in a regular Montessori Classroom there is an "ebb and flow" regarding the children's work time. I mean, the article talked about how, as the kids come into the room, some of them (('m thinking rowdy boys) have a hard time settling down with a task. Once they choose their work, they do fine and the state of "normalization" happens. But, after a while, usually when the children are ready to move on to something different, some of them (those rowdy boys again I bet) goof off, act silly, whatever. Then they are redirected and find, once again that period of normalization when they are involved in a task. I've witnessed this with my own ds. He can work for literally hours (like two!) at something like pattern blocks or puzzles, then all of a sudden he's done and into trouble.
Common sense tells me to give him a break and release some of that physical energy at this point. I try to have something "large motor" for him to do, or just let him go outside to play for awhile. Then there is the calming down period again (a great time to read a book to him) and then he is able to go back to some quiet work. It's certainly important to tune into the child's needs in this regard. I try to keep a close eye on him and nip it in the bud when he starts acting fidgety. My problem is teaching/taking care of my other dc and keeping an eye on this particular ds. I tend to "let him go" when he is working so well on something then all of a sudden I look up from dd's math lesson or something and he is sword fighting with the number rods!
HTH!
Becky
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Kristin
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 10:47am | IP Logged Quote Kristin

Thanks for your response, Becky. I did find it useful and encouraging. As I think about what I wrote I think I could condense it all to a struggle in adapting the Montessori approach more formally throughout the home. It is so challenging to find an appropriate level of expectation when it comes to prepared environment (throughout the home) and a daily routine that I can stick to. Kristin
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Kim F
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 10:58am | IP Logged Quote Kim F

This IS more challenging at home simply because it is not the closed controlled environment of the school. Then again I like to think its more natural and richer.
We likely idealize the level of control achieved at the schools too. That ebb and flow sounds more realistic.

I think an over-arching goal would be to attempt to attain that *normalization* in ourselves. We cannot give what we do not have. If we can achieve a reasonable level of order and calm in ourselves and our environment then we can expect that the children will follow suit. It's that Charlotte Mason idea of habit and example.

Kim

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Genevieve
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 11:46am | IP Logged Quote Genevieve

There are two books that I've seen talk about the normalized child extensively. Children who are not yet peaceful and The normalized child. Perhaps they would be of help to you. I do however, try to help each child create a quiet time. They each have their own niche. They often do not practised focused concentration at the same time. Should one be focused on one thing, I think that my job is to preserve it which sometimes means taking the other child outside.

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amiefriedl
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 6:12pm | IP Logged Quote amiefriedl

It also greatly depends on the child's temperament...have you done any reading on temperments and tried to discern what your child's natural tendancies may be?

The best book for Catholics out right now on the topic is _The Temperament God Gave You_ by Laraine and Art Bennett. There are other resources such as a very good CD conference of the topic on the Opus Sanctorum Angelorum website - the title of the CD is "The Four Temperments" and it is well done. Get both if you can - great for multi-sensory learners!

Knowing the actual temperament of the child will be a great starting point for knowing how your child is "normal". It will be a terrific springboard into understanding yourself and how you are inclined to view your child due to your own temperment.

Check into the temperaments if you haven't already - you'll be glad you did.

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Kristin
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 6:53pm | IP Logged Quote Kristin

Thanks - that is a very good point. I think I'll check out the resources you mentioned. Are they geared specifically towards identifying children's temperaments at all?

I have some background knowledge on the temperaments but haven't completely identified DS's. I think that he is mostly sanguine, though. He also loves routine and order and has always done well with that type of daily structure. I wouldn't say that he is particularly rambunctious (up until the last six months he was actually more the opposite of that) --- but he now has tons of physical energy to get out. I know that I need to be better about providing the right opportunities for that. And if I provide a good structure to the day with activities alternating with "free-play" the day goes very smoothly. He will settle into "work" and "work" for long periods. It's just a matter of me being organized, knowing what to provide, and then having the energy to actually do it.
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Rebecca
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Posted: July 13 2006 at 7:32pm | IP Logged Quote Rebecca

Kristin wrote:
I do know whether I need to try to steer him away from some of the more rambunctious behavior that in my pre-Montessori days never would have phased me (it seems such a natural thing, but maybe it's really not)! Also, I'm having a hard time making the leap away from pretend play", which I grew up with and view as part of childhood, yet has no place in the Montessori approach (as far as I understand it). Any insights on any of this would be very much appreciated!


The rambunctiousness needs an outlet as well. During Montessori's time, the children were not contained in the Children's Houses 24 hours a day, working on the materials. There is definitely a time for boisterous play and large motor skills. Imagine the torment of a boy (or girl for that matter) who is not allowed to run and play and sing loudly. It is just a matter of finding the right time and place. I find that if my boys are not able to sit and focus on the materials of their choosing, then often times they need to run off some steam. In the winter, we put on Sousa and march around the house with drums and horns. In the summer, they are simply sent outside to play.

I know this is not a Traditional Montessori viewpoint but I believe that pretend play is healthy and necessary. Children love to imitate, not only those around them in their home but those they have read about in storybooks. My boys would have led such a dull life without pretend play. During the years that we did not watch tv, they played pretend quite often, acting out historical characters Davy Crockett, St. George, Lewis and Clark, etc), putting on plays from books (Caps for Sale was a favorite), making costumes and props. Most children can tell the difference between reality and pretend play when they are engaged in it themselves (as opposed to on television where those under six may not be mature enough to differentiate between reality and pretend).
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