Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: How to choose Lenten sacrifice? Post ReplyPost New Topic
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Angie Mc
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Posted: March 20 2009 at 2:28pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Before Lent began I was full of enthusiasm and chose my Lenten sacrifices. (Here are 2 topics about what members here give up for Lent.)   Now that we're halfway through Lent, I'm more realistic about my weaknesses and how much stamina 40 days can entail. After reading about failure with fasting, and while I'm in the thick of Lent, I'm wondering...

How do you choose what to sacrifice for Lent? Do you have a criteria? Do you pray for discernment? Do you discuss the matter with your dh, priest, other? Do you do the same thing each year? Do you try to address addictions? Do you see sacrifices as akin to New Year's Eve resolutions? Do you do what others around you are doing? Do you sacrifice as a family and/or individual? Has your criteria changed over the years? How do you hold yourself accountable? Do you make adjustments during Lent? When Lent is over, how do you judge your efforts?

Off the top of my head, I like to have at least one sacrifice that is objective and easy to measure. For example, if I give up treats I either eat a treat or I don't. Another consideration I'm pondering, although I've never really thought about it this way before...I don't want my sacrifices to negatively affect anyone else. For example, growing up I knew many adults who gave up smoking or drinking and become difficult to be around.

Thanks in advance for helping me sort this out .

Love,

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folklaur
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Posted: March 20 2009 at 3:02pm | IP Logged Quote folklaur

i absolutley discuss with DH.

some of my lenten sacrifices that i do i have an easier time keeping. we go no meat for lent, and we pretty much stay on track with that. that as done as a couple, with the kids tagging along for most of it, although they do have meat occasionally.

we also give up things individually.

now - i had thought i was going to give up the internet. but, i still need to get on to check my email for homeschool stuff - and i have a problem with doing it "just a little." the no meat is easier in that respect - because i can just avoid all meat. but the internet - it is SO hard for me to do it "just a little."
and then there is the realization that since i do not have a lot of IRL friends here, the only way i have a connection with other people is with the internet. if i cut that out completely, i would be totally isolated, and i can't imagine that would be good for me at the moment at all. with the anxiety/panic/ibs keeping me housebound so often, if i were to lose all connection to everyone, i can't imagine i would end up as anything but majorly depressed too. so i feel i should just be more diligent in my self control wrt the internet, and only go on at night once everyone is in bed. as you can see from the timestamp, i am not dong so great with this at the moment.

i totally agree with the idea that your lenten sacrifice should not then make you hard to live with like in your examples of someone quitting smoking.   

i find that this year i am adjusting, though i feel guilty doing so. in the past i haven't before, and i am nto sure why i feel so "not with it" in so many areas of my life right now - lent included.

i am looking forward to what others say....i wasn't much help at all, huh?
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Leonie
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Posted: March 21 2009 at 12:02am | IP Logged Quote Leonie

I discuss with my dh but often have a few ideas first, to npresent to him, to think abput, for him to think abput. Since I have older kids, I also discuss my ideas with them. It is interesting to hear their response and I hope this shows them how to be discerning when choosing lenten penances theselves.

Sometimes, too, I do discuss this with a priest, a spiritual director, especially if I feel I am in a bit of a dry period spiritually. And need clarification.

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Sarah
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Posted: March 23 2009 at 11:10pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah

This is hard Angie. I was trying to give up granola and just eat oatmeal until I couldn't do it anymore. I have a nursing toddler who never sleeps and most mornings I stumble into the kitchen and barely function. The oatmeal combined with my other Lenten thing of making breakfast for my husband each morning has been so hard. I know that sounds so weak. But seriously, I am so so tired.

So I quit the oatmeal.

Now I think the best thing a super stressed mom can do is to strive for cheerfulness, patience, and accepting of crosses. I know it can't be measured, but it is still important.

My motto this Lent was serving God by serving others. I wrote about it on my blog. Can't link it, posting from my phone.

Anyway, I am seeing far more merit for me this year to take on practices than to simply go without a candy bar or cookie. I guess you could say I am fasting from nursing anger or impatience. Now, I have a very LONG way to go!


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