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Bookswithtea
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| Posted: Nov 21 2008 at 4:43pm | IP Logged
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I've never had a child who was accelerated before. She is a 6 yr old Ker and has finished Sonlight's K language arts this week, as well as her K math book. She is starting MUS and 1st grade LA on Monday.
The problem I am having is not what to use next. I figure she will just progress faster than my others. The problem I am having is keeping her busy! 
My first wasn't accelerated academically, but he was easily bored and didn't want to watch tv (same with my girl Ker). With my first, I had less children and more time. I bought tons of science kits, crafts kits, and had him in enough activities to keep him busy. And I left a certain amount of time as "masterly inactivity" which encouraged him to be creative. It worked. But now I have 6 children. I don't usually make a priority of driving to activities for a child this young, because the olders really need the social experiences much more and I hate having to put the 3 and 1 yr olds in the car any more than necessary.  I don't have the funds to buy all the kits like I did with #1 and I am suffering from a major lack of time right now, with the ages my kids are. I am worried about her. She is done with school by 10 am and doesn't want to just "play" the rest of the day like her older siblings did. This child would love an intensive hands on curriculum like a full Sonlight core with crafts added on. That is so NOT my life right now. I don't know what to do. I am in one of those years where its almost impossible to just get dinner on the table and the laundry done.
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and  due 9/10
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Bookswithtea
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| Posted: Nov 22 2008 at 10:13am | IP Logged
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Bump...
No one has dealt with this before????
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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missionfamily
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| Posted: Nov 22 2008 at 10:27am | IP Logged
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Books--Could you utilize her in some of your work? Kepp her close to you and give her meaningful tasks as you work--folding and sorting laundry, helping with the younger kids, helping with cooking...is it possible to set up and arts and crafts area for her that she could work at when she's done her major work for the day...I know this is hard when there are little ones, but perhaps could be do-able. Could you find the time to make one Montessori type activity a week for her to work at? Recently I put out a book of constellations, a star chart and some star stickers with black construction paper...the kids spent loads of time making constellations that week...it fit with this year's astronomy study too. So if you're doing alphabet path, can you put out some fairy house supplies this week, or fairy making stuff and just let her go at it? Just trying to help think out loud here...
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Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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5athome
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I would enlist the older children to each take a 30 min or 1 hour block and play a game/craft/etc with her.
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Margaret
ds '93, dd '96, ds '99,
ds '01, dd '04, ds '06,
ds '08
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ALmom
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Books, once again our lives seem to run parallel - except, I, sadly, don't have the younger ones and while I have bright children, each of them except the 6 yo has had some sort of major challenge or vision issue or something so we don't "look" successful in the eyes of the world. It is my youngest of 6(at 6) who is academically racing - but not reading - his area is math and I cannot keep him supplied with enough challenges here. He is the one most likely to whine, get loud, and otherwise get into trouble if not gainfully employed. He wants people around him, paying attention to him at all times but it cannot happen 24/7. He is the one that took the screw driver out and almost had the door unscrewed in order to get in the room with his brothers. My 11 year old was also one like that in that he learned all kinds of things early - he taught himself to read with Lord of the Rings and he was under school age because I don't remember how old he was when he did that. However, I got lucky on his temperment and didn't have the antsy boredom things with him like I do with my 6 year old. Honestly, he was left to discover a lot for himself since I was busy doing therapy with a bunch of other, older children and dealing with emotional/lonliness, teenage things with the oldest. Evidently, he went through and did every single experiment in every single experiment book I had in the house (and I had a bunch desperately trying to get my older two to understand and threw those to the side in frustration because I couldn't get a single one of the experiments to work). He did end up with eye - hand lags and we did therapy but otherwise he has always caught on quickly and raced ahead on things. I was depleted physically and emotionally myself a lot of times and dealing with the other end of the spectrum at the same time with children who were academically struggling and for whom nothing seemed to work. Oh and at the time I just felt guilty because I had no idea he was doing and learning all these things. He was happy and content and I read to him and such, but the therapy we were doing with our non- reading older child just kept me from doing anything academic with him and I felt like I was holding him back. So much for that. He seems to have thrived from this - and because I was so busy, it probably allowed him more time to learn in his prime way - hands on.
I have found that if I step back and utilize the large family, it helps some. For a long time I felt quilty about taking time from the other children (who were often "behind") to ask them to supervise something - but I have since learned to humbly recognize when one of my children is a better teacher in an area. The 6 yo will work with another gifted learner - my science fan for science. His 14 yo brother, who struggles, has taught him any number of things but especially aircraft identification. My highschooler is the paper reviewer, editor for the 14 yo - they happen to have a really close bond and he will accept ideas from her that he finds hard to accept from me. Eveyone discusses history and I do have a huge wall timeline and history/geography cards and books are strewn around. I look for simple to follow project directions that do not require me and these are available. It is good for the struggling learners to be on the teaching end sometimes and if I carefully note any area of talent, we utilize it - it gives them a chance to be the lead and builds confidence. The older children supervise all crafts and clean-up that occur except for an occassional thing I do with everyone. Some of this is time dependent but I do try to make time for it since all my children have a strong kinesthetic component to their learning - and sometimes visual. Very few are auditory as I am. There are two who can clash so I never assign things where one of these is supervising the other but I notice what is taught naturally in those good moments and build from it. Things are still not great, and I still have boredom. I try to direct to activities that he can do on his own but he really needs more of me or someone to do things with him. He hates when everyone else is cracking the books and I'm working with one of the children. I try to include him on any read alouds with the others. I try to entice him to something and sometimes he manages to wreak havoc. We keep trying to strike the best balance we are able to achieve, but I cannot spend 24/7 entertaining and sometimes he has to self direct. If I find just the right thing, he will bring it to the table while I'm working with someone else and just glow. He did that with the cutting for a while but he is quickly bored and ready to move on and I cannot keep up with his need to move on. I do the best that I can.
I have also put out a number of Montessori type trays for him trying to tap into his enthusiasm and need to be constructively busy. You can get a lot of 3 part cards in the science area free online, also geography. I think the biggest thing is that he is one of the few children who is an auditory learner like I am - so he wants to discuss and talk and ... which distracts the other children. We just try to do what families do, patiently train patience, courtesy, consideration and try to come to a good balance. I try to make an hour for my 6 yo to work with me as well as the others I am working with. I have delegated cooking lunch to the 11 year old to fit more time in the day. My 14 year old has agreed to help get dinner started so I can work with the highschooler. It is understood that whoever has meal prep - no one will complain about the fare, we will gratefully eat whatever it is. Sometimes it can be interesting, but my 11 yo is actually a very good cook and generally comes up with a balanced lunch of some sort. I can always throw some salad on the table if needed. I write out plans (specific or loose depending on the child and the need day by day for all the children who can read directions) and try to prioritize the particular things discussed with each child according to need.
I'm still trying to make this work. My schedule dilineates time for clean up and meal planning, time for work with each child and prayer time and even a nature walk time (which has happened once so far) - but, honestly, I've not gotten to work with each child every day yet, I'm still trying to get up early enough in the day to have quiet prayer time alone for me by beating the children up. Between therapy with two, and a distracted child who needs more supervision to stay on target (though he is quite good at things) and a struggler, all things on my plan just don't happen so I have adjusted and am momentarily switching who I work with first based on who I got to the day before and who I didn't. I pray for no disagreements among children during the after lunch break since that is probably my best time for prayer. However, I have to fight my temptation to "talk" on the computer and there are the inevitable bruises and bumps and disagreements. It isn't ideal, and I'm still looking for ideas and ways - but I provide plenty of materials for learning to take place even if I cannot supervise everything.
Oh, and one thing my 11 year old needs in a big way is a science mentor - but until that happens, I simply have lots and lots of books and lots and lots of trash (old water bottles, wires, broken down equipment that they raid for parts). My husband explained chemistry to the highschooler with egg cartons and marbles - and everyone else was in on the act. THe 11 yo was the first to get how to balance chemical equations and is so exited to be able to predict what his experiments might produce as by products - (kind of an important thing for safety). So sometimes hands on doesn't require a lot of expense - though marbles around with toddlers probably wouldn't work. You would be surprised with what the children come up with on their own if they have some good books at their reading level, and access to lots of stuff and parts - just be prepared to have to call dad in as the safety inspector!!! The children are currently re-designing the elevator they made (it originally went 20 ft up in the air, no railings and relied on two pullies and a rope from Home depot and went over the rocks) because if failed dad's safety inspection (I suggested he go outside and take a look trying to balance out my mom protectiveness - ie if dad said it was Ok, I'd have bit my tongue). My 11 yo did the electrolysis with information from a periodic table, access to old chemistry books (most I didn't even know he was reading cause they were very old high school and college books), old wires from something that broke, water, water bottle, ice cream bucket and my food item. They used a motor from an old VCR to turn it into a generator for some other project. We've become major trash recyclers. OH, soda can pop openers and the tops of cans become great armor from the middle ages. The 6 yo has watched the olders make this, and he makes his own now too, though I must admit I do like another child in the room when he is using the hammer or glue gun. They learned how to make paper airplanes and then coat them with a thin layer of wax. Honestly, I've come to accept that my children learn more in ways I haven't a clue how to teach because it is the one way I simply do not learn. I have to be laid back about the use of tools to some extent (ie I cannot be a panicky mother type with my boys) and I've had to be calm and matter of fact about the mess. I simply and calmly ask the mess makers to help clean it up. I was in shock the other day when our 6 yo got out the mop and mopped the floor where his muddy footprints had been - totally unasked. It is possible. As long as they do this, I have no problem letting them make projects in the red clay and discover what they are learning and try to build a certain amount of time into each day for this kind of thing - or have them read a certain amount of stuff and then tell them to select a related project of their choice to work on for the next week or so. I'll have books that give them ideas - but I am totally hands off on projects. I am the "store" and "librarian" - a comfortable role for me and it keeps me out of their way. Oh, and being the store doesn't mean we get everything, price unasked. They form a list, they go check prices, and then there may be some redesign if things are unavailable or the price is too high - or they can save up. I guess we are training some engineers around here. The 6 year old is in the middle of every project the children do. If they are making armor, so is he. If they are crafting an ancient village or ancient weapons, so is he. If they are melting wax, so is he . But they are all learning and gainfully employed.
My 11 yo is now going to try and get a group of boys together and show them how to make a light bulb. Ok, he might as well be showing the other boys in our family! I honestly have no idea how so I have had no part in this. Before we bring in other families, I'm sure our son will run his plans by dad to make sure we won't become the number 1 on an avoid these folks list somewhere or end up with injuries.
It is never easy, never relaxed for me and something always seems to go - one of the reasons besides time constraints that I didn't respond earlier. I desperately need to clean bathrooms and mop the kitchen floor. Right now, I keep it at a level tolerable to those of us who live here, assign clean-up jobs to the biggest mess makers (wouldn't cover the youngers in your house, but I will be supervising the 6 yo and 9 yo soon in learning how to clean the toilets and we have a vinegar and water spray bottle in each bathroom for any misses (hopefully the misser is the one doing the clean-up but not always). I am still searching for answers for one of mines struggles, dad is leading us all in a circle eight therapy exercise (figuring we all had some sort of crossing the midline issues at some point so lets do it once with everyone at the same time even if it is just one child that needs it most). Life will look a whole lot different in our house than my vision of calm, perfection and I've just had to accept my limits and do what is most important right now. I have days when I'm barely above tears or even break down. Sometimes I wonder what in the world I do do in this house - and then feel guilty for feeling so overwhelmed when my children cook, my husband grocery shops, I'm not great at cleaning and clutter reduction. I guess I only attempt to find answers for strugglers, help with the learning, find resources, explain, try to establish liturgical year routines (sometimes very poorly) and train the children. But at this point in time these are the most important and they overwhelm me. If we need to replace the carpets later, we can do it after the children and dogs are gone or on their own. I will never be able to go back and reclaim this time with the children. I try to remember this. Of course, my husband's comfort zone is important in this, but I am fortunate in that he is not that demanding. The one thing he likes is that the books are put away and formal therapy and school is done before he gets home. We are getting better with this and he is happy to chip in and do whatever makes this more likely to happen. We will all vacuum on Saturday if we haven't been able to keep on top of it during the week.
I'm going to be watching this to glean ideas and hope it helps you to know you are not alone. Maybe something in my ramble will throw out an idea or two, but what I've discovered is that at some point something that works for the family just starts to jell. I wish I'd known how to make it happen earlier but it might have needed enough children old enough or the particular temperment of a particular child who finally got old enough to influence the direction of learning. I don't know cause it wasn't anything I did but things are gradually getting better.
Janet
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Bookswithtea
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missionfamily wrote:
| Books--Could you utilize her in some of your work? Kepp her close to you and give her meaningful tasks as you work--folding and sorting laundry, helping with the younger kids, helping with cooking...is it possible to set up and arts and crafts area for her that she could work at when she's done her major work for the day...I know this is hard when there are little ones, but perhaps could be do-able. Could you find the time to make one Montessori type activity a week for her to work at? Recently I put out a book of constellations, a star chart and some star stickers with black construction paper...the kids spent loads of time making constellations that week...it fit with this year's astronomy study too. So if you're doing alphabet path, can you put out some fairy house supplies this week, or fairy making stuff and just let her go at it? Just trying to help think out loud here... |
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I don't know about including her in the chores right now. Truth be told, a lot of them just aren't happening  and when they are, its usually with a 1 yr old on my hip grabbing at everything.
I do have a big craft area set up (a must with 3 girls in a row!  ) but they are all raw ingredients. I hadn't thought about coming up with specific things to do. That might work...if I can find the time to pull it off. I am sure that fairy houses would be a huge hit here!
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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Bookswithtea
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| Posted: Nov 22 2008 at 4:57pm | IP Logged
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5athome wrote:
| I would enlist the older children to each take a 30 min or 1 hour block and play a game/craft/etc with her. |
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I can't do that. What I've found with this particular child is that when I do what you've suggested, she begins to act entitled, as if its everyone else's job to keep her entertained. 
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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Bookswithtea
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Janet, thank you so much for taking the time to share how things are going as you deal with similar issues. Your 6 yr old made me laugh because he sounds like a male counterpart to my 6 yr old! She doesn't tend to get into dangerous trouble as much, but she does manage to find other kinds of trouble. Idle hands are dangerous...I am going to have to find something to fill her time.
Sigh...
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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hereinantwerp
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Sometimes gifted children get into specific interests.
THey can get bored quickly but your job is not to "entertain" or occupy, more to help them focus.
My oldest was very precocious, and zipped through Sonlight year 1 at age 5 in a few months. I had the same "now what??!" feeling! (Though only one other baby at the time!)
In his case, finding the "Redwall" series was a blessing. The books are LOOOOONNNNNG, but still "wholesome" and age appropriate. He read most of them at ages 6 and 7, and has re-read them all at least twice in years since. At 6 my son also got "into" Roald DAhl and read all of those, later the "Oz" books, later it was LOTR. A long term interest is that he loves strategy games (I think the first time he saw "Axis and Allies" and Risk at a friend's house, he was so completely mesmerized, we had to rip him away! I believe he was 5 years old at the time!), and has spent literaly HUNDREDS of hours developing his own games, with pages and pages of quests and carefully drawn charts and handmade boards and cards.
My neighbor's 6 year old is so precocious, the school is, "we don't know what to do with her!". (My neighbor so far is not real open to homeschooling, though she pretty much DOES homeschool). But this little girl is totally interested in animals. She has several animal encyclopedias, and you often find her with one in hand, or outside with a magnifying glass, or her digital camera taking pics of bugs. She has a huge collection of stuffed animals and is always "role playing" different animals (with the habitat, all the facts, etc., she and my middle son often play together, a great a blend of childish imagination, with adult-level knowledge and facts!!) She is an avid reader of Ranger Rick, draws homemade animal cards, keeps a "bird count" of birds she's sighted----well, you get the picture.
For tv and video, try things that are "older"--science documentaries from the library. We just found a show called "Cool stuff and how it works", WOW, what a cool show. Not necessarily made for kids, but my 9 year old son and I were fascinated, and learned a ton.
Maybe she could try some things with you such as learning cooking (slows you down a bit, but fascinating to anyone science or art minded) or gardening.
My biggest recommendation is frequent library trips (hard with little ones, I know, maybe she could go on occasional evenings with you or Dad . . .) where you liberally check out all sorts of books on every sort of topic. Then see what rings her bell, and see where it leads! It seems like on one hand educating a gifted child leaves you exhausted and like you can never keep up, but on the other sometimes they can get into something and be pretty "self-perpetuating", and go at something for hours . . . . there are good books about this stuff at the library, and some good "gifted" forums out there, "Hoagies" is a good one. Good luck!
(We've also loved audio books. The ones by Jim Weiss are the best! These can be great for "occupying" an active mind.)
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Angela Nelson
Mother to Simon (13), Calvin (9), and Lyddie Rose (3)
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: accelerated child in a large family.help?
