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doris Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1103
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Posted: April 15 2008 at 5:53pm | IP Logged
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What do you do about children (not) finishing things? My dc seem to spend lots of time half doing things. Not so much formal 'educational' things but stuff they do of their own accord, eg they start some drawings -- half finish them, leave them lying around. Start doing some junk modelling, half do it, leave it around. Make half a den, leave it around, go off and play with something else...
It's driving me batty! Partly because of all the mess, partly because of not knowing what to do with the resultant halves of things (to recycle or not to recycle) and partly because I'm worrying that it's because of my deeply inadequate mothering that they don't have any sticking power or desire to complete a task
__________________ Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
Frabjous Days
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Lori B Forum Pro
Joined: March 24 2006 Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline Posts: 209
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Posted: April 15 2008 at 7:02pm | IP Logged
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My kids each have a basket for their "works in progess", and if it's full they need to make room for their "latest and greatest" project by either finishing or recycling something. The mess is kept under control, and I'm not the one who has to choose whether to keep or toss something.
My oldest never finished a thing, my 12yo finishes *everything*, my 10yo decides pretty quickly if something is working out the way he wants it to, and my 7yo refuses to part with anything, even if it's crumpled or ruined . She usually resolves this problem by giving her projects away, then *we* have to figure out what to do with them.
Btw, the same system goes for Hubby and I, only my basket is HUGE and Hubby's is a workroom rather than a basket (his projects tend to be a little larger than ours ).
__________________ 22yod, 16yod (Asperger's), 14yos (dyslexia, APD, ADHD), and 11yod (JXG, glaucoma, legally blind)
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ALmom Forum All-Star
Joined: May 18 2005
Online Status: Offline Posts: 3299
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Posted: April 16 2008 at 3:55pm | IP Logged
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Doris:
Your children are still quite young so I don't think I would panic yet . Sounds like some great ideas from Lori that we could implement in our home.
However, since I am so scatterbrained what usually happens at our house is that when I'm in a "I'm going to get my clutter under control" mood, (ie around now when you are wrapping up one year and thinking about how to rearrange for the next) I suddenly notice the piles of stuff my children have and it starts to annoy. I approach the child and ask, "Are you almost done with this project or do you need a container in which to store it?" When paper and trashy looking stuff is really strewn (5 yo is biggest culprit here), I simply remind the particular child that everything must have a home and the home is not the top of the dresser, under the bed or all over the bed. Generally when I remind the child that they did not finish the chore of putting away clothes if they simply piled their clothes on the bed - it must make it all the way to the drawer, I also ask them to find a home for other stuff out of place. The 5 yo would rather throw something away than go to the trouble to pick it up, unless it is important to him. That becomes a natural and the child is gradually learning to be responsible.
The 5 yo has one drawer that is his catch all and every year we purge the projects that have become trash (the exercise of cutting and pasting and folding, etc. were all wonderful for the eye-hand and he is the one suggesting that we toss the stuff), 8 yo has one spot on his desk but is generally neat and organized and completes tasks, the 11 yo has stuff strewn around every location that he occupies, though he is getting better. He sorts through the paper piles on the floor by his desk, the stacks of folded airplanes and the numerous reference books that got buried under his paper piles. He is generally done with the books and learned what he needed, built whatever but never stored it and is off on another adventure. He trashes 99% but generally has one or two projects that were in progress but could not be completed because he doesn't have the appropriate color felt or something. I have him make me a list of needed supplies to finish the project, we store the parts in a neat bin and I purchase the stuff ASAP. The 14 yo is a neat freak so his projects are always under control. The 16 yo is an artist but she keeps her works in progress in some sort of control in her room unless we are approaching a birthday rush or Christmas, etc. at which time I will not open her door or attempt to walk in her room. However, she finishes projects and periodically reorganizes and keeps it all in her bedroom so I'm not worried here.
Janet
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