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LLMom
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| Posted: Aug 24 2005 at 8:40am | IP Logged
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I wasn't sure where to put this. Could go under the more the merrier or this one but anyways... I have 7 children. ONly 1 is really independent in school work. My 12 year old has some learning issues so he is on about the same level as my 9 year old. I feel so frustrated trying to school with my 5 month old, 2 year old and 4 year old. I have tried all of the wonderful toddler activities that are suggested online and have some nice homemade Montessori things for them to do but my 2year old just moves from one thing to the next and doesn't stick with anything for very long. He will stay with something (even water play) for only 5-10 minutes max. He is our wrecking crew! We do take turns having the olders watch him but there is only so much time they can watch him. I feel like too often he is crying because he wants my attention and I can't give it to him and help someone else with math or whatever. Then there is the baby who cries and needs to be held. This year I did switch to a canned curriculum for sanity sake because I didn't have the energy to plan my own things and wanted them to be more independent. It is NOT CM based but more school at home so that I wouldn't have to worry about writing narrations or giving dictations but they still need some help. I don't prefer that but it is a season in my life. I am trying to incorporate living books when i can.
So my question is how do i manage to do all of this while meeting everyones needs? I really want to add more creativity into our schooling as we settle into our year but I can't even manage what we have right now.
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Lisa
For veteran & former homeschool moms
homeschooling ideas
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Becky Parker
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 7:13am | IP Logged
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This is a tough one Lisa. It sounds at though we are in a similiar boat. I have a 4 yo (who is much more immature for his age than peers) and an 18 month old. The 4 year old is extremely active  (some tell me he is ADHD but I'm not ready to label him yet). Last year I was frustrated most of the time with the same things you are going through. This year, the 4 yo has shown me at times that he can be more calm, but the 18 month old is "building speed". Like you, I have made / bought all kinds of little things for them to do. My classroom is actually very Montessori-ish but it's often hard to get them settled into an activity. I'm beginning to wonder if I should just consider this something that will pass and "hang in there"  . On the other hand, and this may sound mean, but I'm actually considering a time out chair just outside the door. I would tell the 4yo that if he can't behave in our school room, he'll have to be outside of it for a while. Now, that doesn't help much with the 18 month old but at least it would be one causing problems instead of two! I'm interested to hear what others have to say.
I just wanted to add that I went with a canned curriculum this year as well - for the same reasons. Of course, I've tweaked it quite a bit... but when things get too difficult I can always fall back on the basic outline and just do what it says without thinking too much about it.
Becky
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Angie Mc
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 10:21am | IP Logged
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Hi Lisa and Becky,
You sure have a lot on your plate! It is frustrating when you are working so hard and have a vision of what you want to accomplish yet things aren't feeling quite right.
For our family, we chose a CM/Real Learning environment and processes to free us to be who we really are. We want to set everyone (including mom) up for success. We have found that doing too much "formal work" at an early age just doesn't work for us. When our children are very young, we don't want to put a lot of formal work on them because this is their time to play, explore, and "be with." Reading living books, doing simple narrations (oral, written, and other) is enjoyable and can be done as a whole family. Including them in our family activities (measuring in the kitchen, counting the folded shirts, etc.) helps give them the attention they need while we grow in connection as a family (and hopefully get laundry done!)
For us, attachment parenting is about figuring out what helps each of us to do and be our best as we interact as a family. Understanding developmental issues, temperaments, learning styles, etc. has helped. Finding the things that we can to together that brings joy to all helps (Living Books, short lessons, narrations - esp. oral ones, child directed activities such as putting on plays, math games, etc.) Being ready to change what we are doing when necessary has helped. Being prayerful and begging the good Lord for guidance has been and will continue to be critical.
Give yourselves some pats on the back for taking on the task of figuring out how to best mother and educate your children. Let's keep asking for ideas and help until we feel some relief. God is and will continue to bless your efforts.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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jlhughes4
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 10:52am | IP Logged
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I certainly can relate to these posts. My 21/2 year old son is the "wrecking crew" in our household as well. He goes from one thing to another and doesn't stay on any one thing for very long. Gets into everthing. I've put up those tot locks that have a magnetic key on most of my cabinets. This has helped a bit but now he has discovered he can open doors. He does not play with toys but prefers real tools, vacuum cleaners, and small kitchen appliances. He needs constant super vision.
I would also like some ideas how to handle him as well. I 'm dreading getting started with school because of the this. For me I find a canned curriculum too frustrating to follow with this active toddler. I 'm teaching 3 other childern ages 11, 9, and 5. Keeping it simple is better for me. I keep to the basics and try to provide my childern with work they can do independently. I just help them as needed. I don't think we get as much done as I would like but I keep reminding myself this stage will not last for ever.  I have had to be firm with him and set limits. Time out chair as well. He can play with one pot and pan and spoon but not the whole cupboard full. He just keeps on testing me.
I also have each of my childern play with him during the day but these usually last a very short time. He is aggresive too, pinches and bites etc. 
My local homeschooling group was fortunate to have Montessori teacher come speak. She gave me many ideas but I have a hard time keeping him interested in them. He just makes a mess. I recently bought Natural Structure to glean ideas and activites to do. I wish I could be of help but I'm really in the same boat. I hope someone else can give suggestions as well.
Jenny Hughes
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God Bless,
Jenny Hughes
"Lord help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that you and I can't handle together."
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Patty
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 10:56am | IP Logged
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We have seven children and I've been where you are! Our two oldest are 19 and 21 and in college, and the youngest will be SIX this fall. These baby and toddler zip past, though it doesn't seem so when you're in the midst of it! I tried using a boxed curriculum in the beginning of our homeschooling but it was dull, confining, and pure drudgery for the most part. We found going to unit studies/family learning/CM so freeing, more joyful, and do-able. And they remembered what we studied! That often wasn't true with the boxed stuff. It's still work, but since it is more fruitful I don't mind the work as much.
When we had babies and toddlers, we kept everyone with us unless they were napping. The baby would often be in a sling, or on my lap or hip while I read aloud, listened to a child read, or helped with math. Sometimes I would put an older baby or toddler in a backpack, or in a high chair next to us. We have a learning room that is open to a large family room, which was always scattered with toddler toys! Mine didn't always play with one thing for a long time either, but moved from one activity to another. This wasn't a problem. It *does* create more mess, but we would have a quick pickup before lunch and another before supper. I think the main thing is to have a welcoming attitude about including the little ones in your homeschool. You might try having a short baby/toddler session at the beginning of your day so that they have special time with you. Read, sing songs with actions, whatever. Mom's attitude is SO important and they will pick up on how you are feeling about them. I *know* how frustrating it can be, but my days went so much better when I could laugh and hug them instead of getting impatient.
I don't know if this has been helpful at all, but my one last bit of advice, and the most important, is PRAY. I would too often forget that, trying to figure my own solutions out, and then when I prayed the answer would come. Often in an unexpected, surprising way. God cares for you and your family more than you could ever imagine. He wants to give you all the graces you need to do this well. I will pray for you also.
God bless,
Patty
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LLMom
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 2:18pm | IP Logged
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THanks ladies. THe reason for the canned curriculum was because it has been frustrating for both myself and the older children to be interrupted every other sentence by the toddler during read a loud time, or to have a game or project scattered by an excited child. So, the sit down stuff (boring as it may be) has made things a bit calmer but I feel bad about it. I know this year is just survival and even though we are doing a canned curriculum, the little ones do interrupt because my oldest ones are not totally independent. I have managed a short read a loud time while my toddler eats his yogurt but he is a whiz even at eating so he can get on with busier things.
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Lisa
For veteran & former homeschool moms
homeschooling ideas
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Leonie
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| Posted: Aug 25 2005 at 5:58pm | IP Logged
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Lisa,
I don't know if this is a help, but occasionally it was been good for my older ones to have a little bit of independent work each day and then just free time and chores together.  My focus, for that period of our life, could be the little ones.
So, we lived and learned together, with the toddlers and the independent work did not need my input - say a Maths page and a a handwriting page. A journal entry or drawing. The kids came up with other,creative things to do on their own - with access to toys, art supplies, the back yard, etc.
For dc to work independently, though, I found that the work has to be either just at or just below their level - so it can a) be truly independent and b)progress slowly, step by step.
The rest of the day is real learning  . This can be a short term idea.  And we tried reading aloud at night or listened to book CDs in the car.
Leonie in Sydney
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: real learning, AP & large families
