Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Jenny
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Posted: April 11 2006 at 11:00am | IP Logged Quote Jenny

How many of you have homeschooled all the way through? It seems like each year around here fewer and fewer families continue to homeschool. Our parish went from about 95% homeschooled 8 yrs ago to now a handful.

What has kept you going? How do you avoid the burnout so many of them talk of?

I will say, although we are still new homeschoolers (3yrs) we try to keep things simple. We don't do alot of away from home things, we don't belong to any groups so we have no pressure to "do" or "go" or "be". Will this serve us well in the long run?

Jenny

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Chris' wife and momma of 7. My blog: The Littlest Way--Bible Journaling, Inspiring Bible Quotes, Daily Affirmations, Prayer Journaling & photography
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Patty
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Posted: April 11 2006 at 4:02pm | IP Logged Quote Patty

Hi Jenny!

This is our fourteenth year of homeschooling, so I guess that counts as "the long haul". :-) I do smile whenever someone calls me a "veteran", though!

We love the homeschooling lifestyle, the amount of time we can be together as a family, and therefore the influence we can have on our children for good, to teach them our Faith and most importantly to live it in front of them. We love the flexibility of homeschooling, too. We can travel whenever we want, take breaks whenever we want, take time off for a baby or homeschool in the summer if that is best for us.

I don't always avoid burnout, but I keep it at bay most of the time by praying for wisdom, trying to be attentive to my kids' needs and interests, and by being choosy about the things we are involved in outside the home. We are involved in more things now, but when I had babies and toddlers we weren't. Our youngest is now six. Still, we do need to choose prudently.

Another thing I've realized is that homeschooling and a perfectly clean home are not attainable at the same time, at least for me. We strive for order but have to remember that our home is for our family, and is not just a showplace.

I guess the main thread running through my post is balance. Achieve a healthy and happy balance in your homeschooling and family life, keep praying for wisdom, and be open to new ideas and possibilities.

God bless,

Patty
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mom3aut1not
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Posted: April 11 2006 at 5:52pm | IP Logged Quote mom3aut1not

Jenny,

This is my 15th year of hsing, and so far two dc have graduated via Clonlara. One is working on graduating next year, and one is in K currently. I guess I just kept on keeping on as no better alternative presented itself. (Believe me, with a dd with emotional problems, hsing truly was an act of love. Nothing else would have kept me hsing her.)

I did find that three things-- other than God's grace -- did help me. 1) Look at your *real* alternatives -- not an idealized school or homeschool. As long as hsing is your best alternative -- even if you are not Homeschooler of the Year -- then hsing is what you should do. If it's not your best alternative, then don't. Each family has to make this determination as the circumstances of each family differ. 2) Have specific goals. This helps me to stay on track (I hs disabled kids) and to know that I am making progress. This can be quite a relief when my youngest is lost in a fog. 3) Listen to other hsers and learn from them, but always with caveat that they are also imperfect human beings. I have gotten great ideas and materials from some people, but bad advice from a veteran hser kept me spinning my wheels too long.

I do have a friend who has been hsing for about 24 or 25 years. She did send her oldest dc to school for high school and wound up regretting it. She has recently become a widow, and I do not know if she will be able to hs through to the end with her youngest, but I do know that she will try as hard as she can. She quite firmly believes in hsing to the end.

In Christ,
Deborah
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Leonie
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Posted: April 12 2006 at 5:44am | IP Logged Quote Leonie

We have homeschooled all the way throguh and still have four homeschooling.

For me, its been vision. The vision is what helps me get enthused, keep going.

And I read or re-read books, sometimes, to help foster that vision.



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Willa
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Posted: April 12 2006 at 9:36am | IP Logged Quote Willa

mom3aut1not wrote:
3) Listen to other hsers and learn from them, but always with caveat that they are also imperfect human beings. I have gotten great ideas and materials from some people, but bad advice from a veteran hser kept me spinning my wheels too long.


I'm a 12-year veteran and have one graduate. We started when the oldest was in 2nd and have kept going since, and hope to keep it up for the interim (my youngest is 3 so that gives us many more years).

Yes, one survival tactic for me has been to look for ideas and support from other homeschoolers, but to take what works for me and drop the rest without regret, figuring that's not what God wants for our own unique family even if it "looks" good.

It is a bit related to what you say about staying home. It's true that too many outside activities burn some people out, but I think the emphasis is on "too many". You have to find the balance for your family, and not do things just because they're available or you feel you "should".

I think those "shoulds" and "homeschool guarantees" often burn people out when it's not working for them and they don't know why.

Homeschooling is primarily about a "culture of love" to me. Excellent academics, wonderfully trained kids, all that may well often be a by-product but I can struggle through the times when the academics aren't happening and the kids are causing problems because to me hsing isn't a guarantee, it's just a (better, in my opinion) way to confront the challenges that come with the territory of raising a Catholic family in today's world.

I think "keeping things simple" as you say is conducive to that because it keeps you close to the essential priorities.   You can flex the details according to your season in life and the capabilities of your children, so sometimes your homeschool might "look" more complex, but I think it helps if there's a core element there -- in our case, the core is our family culture under God.



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TracyQ
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Posted: April 13 2006 at 11:14am | IP Logged Quote TracyQ

Jenny,
    I am going to share an article I wrote for our local Catholic homeschooling support group's newsletter. I write a regular article titled, *Nuts and Bolts*. It's about the nuts and bolts of homeschooling. This was my first article this year, which came out around Advent. It fits with what you're asking very well, so I thought I'd share it. It's about climbing the homeschooling mountain, and coming to the top of that mountain, something that's scary, yet beautiful! I hope this is a blessing.
Tracy

                  Climbing the Mountain

                    by Tracy Quebral


     As I sit here to write this, once again, I’m kicking myself for not having done it sooner. I am also humbly admitting that I am not perfect! There! I said it! I’m NOT perfect! And I’m also a procrastinator. (Shhhh…please don’t tell anyone. Let that be our little secret!)
     Truth be told, for this Nuts & Bolts article, it’s not that I didn’t think about it, or that I just put it off because I was busy or forgetful. It’s really Jesus’ fault! I just did not know what He wanted me to write about until this very morning! He gave me the topic for this article in a Catholic devotion that I get every day in my email. I read it, and realized that this was the topic of which He wanted me to speak to you!
     “Nuts and Bolts” is about the nuts and bolts of homeschooling; the nitty gritty of how it’s done. And there are many ways to accomplish that task, so there is a lot to talk about! But this month, I want to do something a bit different. I want to talk not about the hows and whats of homeschooling, I want to talk about the big picture of being a homeschooling MOM.
     Yesterday, a new year began! It was the first day of Advent, the first day of our new liturgical year! What a blessed time it is! For me, the first Sunday of Advent is always a blessing, and is very special! It’s a time to begin again! In a way, it reminds me of January 1st, when we feel refreshed, and renewed, and ready to make changes in our lives. It’s a way to begin another liturgical year in our Faith, ready to take on the challenge of following the Lord daily, giving us a new outlook….a desire in our hearts to change for the Lord!
     My devotion this morning was about Advent. And it’s first paragraph said this, “Advent is like climbing a mountain. It takes time, preparation, and perseverance to reach the mountaintop. Likewise, to receive all that Jesus has for us this Christmas, we need the discipline and discipling of Advent.” Likewise, during our Advent journey, we might come to feel we are getting nowhere. We might feel no extra inspiration or see no spiritual progress despite our Advent prayers, Masses, and Confession.” Nonetheless, keep moving forward.”
     But that got me to thinking about homeschooling, and how homeschooling too is like climbing a mountain. It takes time, preparation, and perserverance to reach the mountaintop! Likewise, to receive all that Jesus has for us in our calling to homeschool, we need the discipline and discipling of the homeschooling journey up the mountain. We might feel no extra inspiration or see no progress despite our hard work, endless hours of planning, and sacrifices to our children and family.          ;    
     Have you ever climbed a mountain, or a large hill? When you climb, you can’t see the mountaintop. It seems like it’s taking a long time, and it seems every time you look back, that you haven’t gone very far. But you keep going, and climbing in spite of it, trusting that sooner or later, you will reach the top.
     Like that, we often can’t see the top of our mountain. The trees and bushes of the journey keep blinding our view, and in climbing the homeschooling mountain, the everyday grind is what blinds our view from the mountain top of our homeschooling journey.
     As we near the top, all of a sudden, the top comes into view, and we realize we’re much closer than we realized! And we continue on. And after years of faithful service in obedience to Jesus, in our calling to home educate our children, we have finally reached the top! Upon reaching the top, we look down, and see that the Lord has sustained us on this very tiring, difficult journey, but we feel exhilaration, and true JOY at the success we have just achieved! And we feel a sense of all that we just accomplished, knowing we have given of ourselves in so many ways to our family, and to our vocation in a very blessed and special way!
     I have not yet reached the top, as my children are still homeschooling. I have not graduated any of my kids from high school yet. But I am on the journey, and am beginning to see the top through the trees. And all the emotion of that has been filling my heart these past two years. I am beginning to see some of the fruits of my sacrifice and service to Jesus in my vocation as homeschooling mom.
      I’m watching my children grow in so many ways every day, seeing them form opinions of their own, when before they used to mimic my opinions. I’m beginning to hear them in conversation with others, forming their own thoughts and words, when they used to copy mine. I’m seeing them show compassion toward others, and make good choices of their own accord, when before, I used to be the one to gently persuade them to do so. And I’m seeing them touched by the Lord’s love, and to develop their own faith in God through our precious church, when not so long ago, they went to Mass because they were carried there, and made the sign of the cross when I lovingly guided their hands to form the proper motions. The fruits of our labor are shown to us along the way, but we see them more and more as we approach the top of the homeschooling mountain as our reward for a job well done!
      There’s a bittersweet feeling when we reach the top of the climb. We feel relieved and exhilarated because we are tired and weary, but we feel sad because we’re now finished. We feel proud of the success we were able to accomplish, yet regretful for all that we wish we could have done that we never were able to do. We feel grateful that we were able to do what we did, yet selfish that we wish we could have the chance to do it all again. Yet with all of the mixed feelings we may have, we look down over the vast, beautiful journey we just made, and we feel true joy; the true joy that comes from knowing that we were able, only by the grace of God, to have done something so incredibly inspiring and awesome, that not too many people get to do.
We are a “special lot”. We are a force to be reckoned with when people try to kick us down. We are mamma bears that protect and defend our families. We are gentle, loving women that care for so many others. We are compassionate and kind. We are humble, devoted servants and disciples of the Lord. We are strong; we are tenacious; and we are blessed. We are homeschooling moms!
     We must always trust that in our calling, in our vocation as homeschooling moms, God would never leave us ill equipped for the journey up the mountain. He gives us everything we need to serve Him well on our journey. He will give us rest when we’re weary, food when we’re hungry, and drink when we’re thirsty.
Our nuts and bolts tools for this difficult climb are many, and precious. They are treasures to be used wisely, and fully, never to be taken for granted, and always to be used with gratitude and joy. The precious treasures given to us for the journey are found in our beautiful Catholic Church.
      He gives us a guide, so beautiful, so loving, to be our example daily, and prayerfully lift us up on our journey. Mary, our Blessed Mother; who was a beautiful homeschooling mom herself. He gives us a map, the truths and teachings of our Faith, the Catechism, and the Holy Bible, to help guide us, so we’ll know where we are traveling. He gives us so many blessed saints who are there to teach us, showing us how to travel, as they’ve traveled before us on the journey to Christ. He gives us each other, brothers and sisters in the Lord, our community, to lift us up in prayer and to help each other when we stumble and fall along the way. He gives us so many resources, books, teachings, and music, lovingly written, and talents selflessly used to aide us in what we do every day, and help to give us direction. He gives us the Holy Spirit, to help us discern our route. And most of all, He gives us himself, as a loving sacrifice, food for the hungry, drink for the thirsty, and rest for the weary, every day in the most Holy Eucharist, and in the Sacraments that are the most beautiful and precious treasures of all.
      Climbing the mountain is not easy! It’s very difficult. But we must always look to the Lord on our journey, and always focus our eyes on Him. In His word, He tells us, “…many peoples shall come and say: “Come, let us climb the Lord’s mountain, to the house of the God of Jacob, that He may instruct us in His ways, and we may walk in His paths.”” (Isaiah 2:3) “Therefore, since we have this ministry through the mercy shown us, we are not discouraged.” (2 Corinthians 4:1) “And let us not grow weary in well-doing, for in due season we shall reap, if we do not lose heart.” (Galatians 6:9)
“Therefore, we are not discouraged; rather, although our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to what is seen but to what is unseen; for what is seen is transitory, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Corinthians 5:16-18).
      We walk by faith, and not by sight. We do not have to see where the Lord is leading us on our journey, but to only trust in His love and plan for us. When we walk in faith, trusting fully in Him, we will indeed reach the top of the mountain, and we’ll look down, see fruits of our journey, and will be able to shout from the mountaintop, as we hear the Lord say, *Well done, my good and faithful servant!*


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Tracy Q.
wife of Marty for 20 years, mom of 3 wonderful children (1 homeschool graduate, 1 12th grader, and a 9th grader),
homeschooling in 15th year in Buffalo, NY
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