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Angie Mc
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Thanks for voting! If you have time, please share your definition of "socialization", explain your poll choice, and/or share any of your thoughts on socialization connected to home education.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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CrunchyMom
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I chose "mostly" because, while I'm not sure that more time with other children is the answer, I'm not always satisfied that my oldest really "gets" it. He's kind of a pest sometimes.  Overall, I chalk any awkwardness up to his being only 6, but occasionally there is that fear that he's going to forever think that the appropriate way to make friends is to walk up and shove someone. 
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Lindsay
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Elena
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"Socialization" is the ability to handle oneself appropriately in a variety of social settings with other individuals from a variety of ages, backgrounds, cultures and socioeconomic situations.
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Elena
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Erin
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Definition of Satisfied:
1. Filled with satisfaction; content:
Adjective:
contented, happy, content, fulfilled, appeased, gratified, pacified, pleased
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Erin
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KauaiCatholic
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when we started this HS journey, I thought of socialization in terms of getting the kids active in outside activities so they knew how to interact with other children. now (and more in keeping with Elena's definition) I realize it is a process that truly begins at home. I am so very grateful for the people who have complimented my children's ability to speak comfortably with adults or treat smaller children kindly, because that has opened my eyes to this more important definition of socialization.
another reason I voted yes so easily is that after much prayer and some lonely years, we have found several good sets of friends. that has helped immensely, especially since no one is interested in sports around here except Papa so we don't have team experiences to draw on.
we attended a pool party this weekend at which a group of older boys kept picking on the younger ones ... no real reason; they appeared to be bored or maybe just plain mean. it reminded me of that wise response to questions about socialization: who do you WANT your child to learn relationship skills from? his peers, in all their youth and inexperience (or worse, experiences of doubtful morality) or you?
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 Viviane
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SeaStar
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This is an area we struggle with here. I am happy with my children's abilities to interact with people of all ages, and they enjoy the company of all different people.
OTOH, we live in an area where most kids go right from school to the next scheduled activity. There is very little free play time. So quite often there is no one around in the neighborhood for my dc to play with, which is frustrating. Everyone is at piano or soccer or dance every day after school.
My kids don't really need more enrichment activities, but they *would* like more kids to just play with out in the yard.... 
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Kathryn
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I answered yes most readily without any hesitation. We live on a cul-de-sac street with 22+ kids ranging from age 13 down to newborn and my children interact with them all. Of course they play mostly with the kids closest to their age but there is also quite a bit of crossing the age boundaries. And the adults are most active too. Plus, my husband is the youngest of 7 so there is a large network of people when we gather with his family. They each have a couple other friends that are outside our street and the family but that's it.
However, now after reading the below quote, I would say their socialization skills are still most def. being worked on b/c obviously as children, I cannot say that their socialization skills follow this definition. But, I believe they are exposed to enough different situations to warrant a yes.
Elena wrote:
"Socialization" is the ability to handle oneself appropriately in a variety of social settings with other individuals from a variety of ages, backgrounds, cultures and socioeconomic situations.
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Kathryn in TX
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Angie Mc
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Socialization isn't a top worry for me. I never bought the anti-homeschooling arguments based on "socialization." I'm outgoing and was always blessed with great friends and my children get along with eachother and everyone they meet. Yet, I have had moments of a worry, especially in the early years, about my children...will they make friends...will they keep friends.
The key for us has been, patience. A combination of 2 big gifts from God, 6 years in one location + a few great families to grow up with - have made all in our family more than satisfied! Add to this our parish, neighbors, sports mates...we're very grateful. Right now is an especially precious time as our social circles are expanding to include special people via our teenagers and their independent life choices.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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JodieLyn
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First of all, realizing that children are a work in progress.. I don't think it's a done deal.. there is always refinement going on. The boys and girls that reach the age where they're more aware of the fact that they are boys and girls and how that works now. The toddlers that the older boys teach to wrestle hard and then they grow and the older boys have to now teach them to play without hurting someone 
It's just a constant changing thing going on as they're growing. But in each scenario it's realizing that what used to work doesn't work and changing with the situation.
We live in a small town, we go to Church, we play sports, we're involved in scouts, we have a homeschool group, etc etc etc.
My kids are generally comfortable in just about any situation as far as being able to talk with others. I almost always get nice comments for instance when my oldest works with the older ladies in the kitchen at our Church Christmas Bazaar.
The one I always laugh at though is when someone tells me that she's so outgoing that she'd do really well in the public school.. hmm no not really because she'd be forever in trouble for talking when she shouldn't be ask me how I know
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leanne maree
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Definitley satisfied with socialisation of dd. She has lovely friends, enjoys Guides, Dancing and has non h/s friends as well.
She can socialise both vertically and amongst her age group.
Leanne
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Leanne
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Erin
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Okay, I just cast my vote, I mulled and analysed and 'got really deep' over this question
I voted 'somewhat'. To explain (do you really want to know ) Age range affects answer.
Our children are very involved in sports in the community, involved in the parish liturgical roster, the older two have jobs in the community, and by the definition of socialisation shared by Elena can generally handle themselves well in a variety of situations. Some better than others and as it is a work in progress age also plays a part as well as personality.
They have friends, mostly hs friends, some have friends of the same gender and opposite, some only of the opposite gender. My dd6 for example has no little girls to play with, not the end of the world though.
I am very sad though that they are growing up with no Catholic friends, so no, I am not 'contented' with that part of their life. Particularly I am not satisfied for my older children, they have no strong peers to be transitioning into the world with. I admit I am feeling the lack of good companions for my oldest ones.
But I have faith, He has a hand in it all and we are on a journey, blessedly together. 
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Erin
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leanne maree
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I suppose Erin, this is why it is important to keep the connections with 'h/s camp' friends. So they can transition into the world with them.
I know dd friends are not all here in this city, but she has some others cities and country NSW.
But you are right, God has it all in hand.
leanne
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Becky Parker
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I said "mostly" because while my children meet regularly with other kids and are involved in social activities, my 6yo often says he's lonely. The boys that we have in our homeschool group are all 9 and older and friends of my other son's. They are nice to him, and try to include him but he keeps saying he wants his own friends. That makes me sad, but I'm not sure what to do about it.
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JodieLyn
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Erin, I don't believe my oldest is as old as your's but I have noticed that sometimes the older kids are "out of step" with their peer groups. From what I can see though, I'm fairly sure it's the peer group that has the "problem". They are finding comfort in the changes because everyone else is "like them" and so to have someone who isn't choosing to be a cookie cutter cutout is "dangerous" and they sorta seem to avoid them.
I notice that here it is often worse as the kids are transitioning in and out of the middle school.. which is only grades 6, 7 and 8.. but that they seem to relax after they've had time at the high school. The whole "you're different and I'm scared to be different by being around you" type of thing.
I don't think I can really blame them though. My kids are home and get lots of positive reinforement from family and other adults. Those kids have to go to school where being different can be quite difficult to say the least.
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Angie Mc
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Becky Parker wrote:
| my 6yo often says he's lonely. The boys that we have in our homeschool group are all 9 and older and friends of my other son's. They are nice to him, and try to include him but he keeps saying he wants his own friends. . |
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We have experienced the exact same dynamic. When we moved here 6 years ago, my oldest two children wanted/needed friends. We got together with families who had friends their ages and with whom the children got along well. By the time my 3rd child wanted/needed friends, we already had established families as friends, to some degree. There are children within these families that are around his age, and he loves them, but he never actually chose them. Besides, he sees his 3yr older brother as his best friend. Not sure if this makes a difference in special/long time friendships outside of the family. Time will tell.
My biggest worry is for my 5yo. He was literally born into this area, this gathering of friends. There are many wonderful children around his age, but once again, he hasn't chosen them. And he is 6 years the junior of his closest sibling, who he sees as his best friend. I wonder what this little man's friendships will look like as he ages. In the mean time, he is happy and handles social situations of all sorts with likeability and eager participation.
Love,
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Angie Mc
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dinasiano
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I said "other" because I wanted to tell all of you that socialization problems can exist both in school and at home. We just began this journey two years ago, pulling children out of schhol. My oldest was already in high school, but in many ways it was too late for him. He never quite felt that he fit in at school and I have spent many days wondering why God didn't call us to this a lot sooner. BUT it is in His hands and I trust in Him completely. I am confident that my son wiil come out of his teenage years ok, but it continues to be a heartbreaking journey.
I am posting this to encourage all of you. It is my very humble opinion that our children thrive most at home.
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Angie Mc
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Thanks for sharing your encouragement, Dina. I remember your prayer request for your son a few months back. My prayers continue for you all  .
Love,
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Angie Mc
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folklaur
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No. 
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mamalove
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Yes. My oldest is 12, and he is a fine young man. The girls are all happy and well adjusted as well. I love it because they can converse with any age person, and for the most part, be well behaved in public.
We have a great parish with mostly homeschooling families. Most of us live rurally, so we have potluck and fellowship every Sunday. The children really look foreward to this friend time.
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folklaur
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I thought I should flesh out my "no."
My younger children are extremely well behaved - this is no credit to our parenting - this is simply their personalities.
They can get along with people of all ages with no trouble at all. They can converse and hold conversations with people of any age (a little harder for my autistic son, of course, but he still does.)
But - they have very few peers to just "be" with.
I, personally, think this is still the big taboo subject in homeschool circles. Of course my children are socialized - then can get along in society just fine! But they are lacking socialization in that they do not have a lot of friends their age. Just because they attend a class or activity with a group of peers or close-to, does not mean they are "with friends." And so often it seems to me, that homeschool parents want to micromanage their children's schedule to the point where even being with friend of similar age must have a "purpose." Sometimes, I think they just need to be.
And I think some homeschooling Moms are desperately needing to talk about the "lack of friends" but to talk about socialization is like a "bad word" almost.
And there is my before-tea-morning-ramble.
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: Satisfied with children's socialization? (
Topic Closed)
