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Anne McD
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Posted: Feb 24 2010 at 3:28pm | IP Logged Quote Anne McD

My ds, 8, says "um" quite often while reading aloud. Part of me realizes that his reading isn't completley up to par and he's thinking, but its also a bad habit to get into. I've got him reading to me every day now, and I'd like to help him break the habit, but I don't want our reading time to turn into a fight over this. Has anyone helped their children get over something like this? How do I remind him gently, without being overbearing? I don't want to just ignore it and hope it goes away, because I figure it will get worse and will be tougher to break.

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Christine
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Posted: Feb 24 2010 at 4:55pm | IP Logged Quote Christine

My eighth grade teacher had us say, "um", every time someone in our class said "um". We have done the same in a good-natured fashion in our house with great success. The child who was saying "um" did not mind at all. He knew that we were trying to help him overcome a negative habit.

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Posted: Feb 24 2010 at 4:59pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

Yes what Christine said.. however you want to bring notice to the habit.. and as long as it's mutual.. it can be like a game.. and if you can keep the attitude of "game" then it's a challenge to stop saying umm rather than punative.

I recall doing something of the same in Theatre in high school. And you will quickly learn to just shut your mouth and let things be silent.. because some of it is simply being afraid of being silent when you're "on the spot".

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SuzanneG
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Posted: Feb 24 2010 at 5:46pm | IP Logged Quote SuzanneG

yes...we do "game" thing too. We all start to say "um, um" and then everyone bursts out laughing. Keep it good-natured and not a big deal.

::Also, if you're alone with them, just reminding them to slow down a bit.

::We give it a "name" too. We say the word "CRUTCH" and they know what that means. And, then explain what "crutch" means and that everyone has one....

And I blame it on my dad.... ....we tell the story about how "Grandpa Gord" didn't let us say "um" or "like" when we were growing up, so he would do something funny, hum, or slap his hand on the table whenever we did it.

My mom is a college prof for pre-med students and she slaps her hand on her desk whenever her students say "like". Needless to say, her hand is VERY VERY VERY sore at the end of each day . She considers it her small little contribution to society.... She tells them she can't IMAGINE anything worse than having a doctor explaining something to a patient with LIKE inserted every 3 words!

This is a bit off-topic ("like" as opposed to "um"), but thought you'd get a laugh out of this:
Teens Speech Patterns Fail to, Like, Demonstrate Intelligence

Sorry... ...I get a little carried away with the LIKE phenonmenon!

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Posted: Feb 24 2010 at 7:32pm | IP Logged Quote Jody

Here is an idea that I use with my son who tends to stutter, but it could also be used with the "um" habit.

While my son reads aloud I use a little chart that I made up. I fold a piece of paper in half lengthwise and put a smiley face on the top of one half and a sad face on the top of the other half.

When my son reads a word without stuttering he gets a tally mark in the smiley face column. If he reads a word and stutters then he gets a tally in the other column.

He loves to keep track of this and always reminds me to use the chart. He loves to better his score from day to day. Needless to say his reading and the stuttering have greatly improved.

This may also work for the "um" habit. Everytime your child reads a word or a sentence without using "um" he gets a tally mark. At the end of the reading time have your son count up the tally marks and try to better his score the next time.

Jody



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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 8:07am | IP Logged Quote hmbress

Just got this today, and it's like, totally, apropo, ya know?



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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 9:24am | IP Logged Quote SuzanneG

hmbress wrote:
Just got this today, and it's like, totally, apropo, ya know?

Heather...that is GREAT!!!!!! I'm forwarding it to my whole family and we will all laugh about it for MONTHS! It's one of our favorite topics, unfortunately

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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 9:29am | IP Logged Quote kingvozzo

I'll have to try some of these. My ds11 has a terrible time with "um" and "like."

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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 12:04pm | IP Logged Quote MelissaClaire

I remember as a child being at the dinner table and my dad would raise the fingers on his hand each time one of my teenaged siblings said "um" or "like". Bringing attention to it in that quiet way seemed to break the habit quickly, but they were 15 and 16.

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Anne McD
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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 12:17pm | IP Logged Quote Anne McD

Wow-- thank you all so much! I feel, like, you get me? Like, you know what I'm going through? Um, yeah.....

So, so sorry. I had a bad "like" habit when I was in high school and it drove my parents nuts. I finally came to a point in my life when I wanted to sound like the adult my age said I was!

My own personal gripe? When someone speaks, and the last three or four words drag off in some gutteral tone, like the words are being dragged across the ground. Big with the kids these days.

Christine, Jodi and Suzanne-- I love the game idea. I think as long as I present it in a good natured, fun way, and he sees it as a habit we're helping him to overcomoe, not just something I'm nagging him about, then he'll go along with it.

Thanks for the laughs-- I forwared the video to my hubs!

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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 12:34pm | IP Logged Quote Teachin'Mine2

In a public speaking class at a home school group, there was one person who counted the number of times the speaker said um, or like, etc. and the count was given to the speaker at the end of their talk.   It gave them feedback in a non-judgmental way, and made them aware of how often they were doing it.   Sometimes it just takes awareness and a lot of practice to break a habit.   Maybe you could ask your son who he'd like to do the counting for him, so it's not you assigning someone.   Also helps the counter to pay attention to what's being said.    
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Anne McD
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Posted: Feb 25 2010 at 6:27pm | IP Logged Quote Anne McD

I was thinking while he was reading to me today that money might be a good promter. I'll put out 100 pennies and for every "um," I'll take one away. Whatever is left at the end of the week is his.

Yes, I'm paying off my child....

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Posted: Feb 26 2010 at 2:00pm | IP Logged Quote Jody

I bet you'll see results with that idea Anne!


Jody

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Posted: Feb 26 2010 at 7:51pm | IP Logged Quote Teachin'Mine2

That idea sounds like a winner to me too!    
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Posted: March 03 2010 at 1:02pm | IP Logged Quote Anne McD

Just to check back-- it worked! After two days of gently saying "um" every time he did when reading, it all but stopped!

Thanks ladies! You're, like, um, the best, you know?

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