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Becky J
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| Posted: Dec 12 2009 at 6:19pm | IP Logged
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I do not currently homeschool but have been on this board for a few years because I've always thought I might end up homeschooling. It looks like I might end up doing that as soon as next fall.
My oldest child has been attending kindergarten at a small school run by a faithful, vibrant order of religious sisters. When the school was founded last year, it was an answer to all the prayers and expectations my husband and I had, and it has more than exceeded the expectations.
But we are heartbroken now because the order has decided they can't make a "go" of the school past this year. They are having to close the school and are integrating the sisters into a diocesan school. That diocesan school is quite far away from our home (at least 45 minutes one way, and I'd be making that 45-minute drive 4 times a day, barring the possibility of carpooling). So my husband and I are exploring other ideas for our kids' schooling, and to me homeschooling seems like the only worthwhile choice. (Both the public and parish schools close to us are excellent academically, but I've been told the parish school isn't any great shakes in its Catholicity, and public school is, well, public school.)
Has anyone else been in this position before: seeing a wonderful school where their child thrived closing down, and ending up picking up the pieces and homeschooling? I know there are many advantages to homeschooling, and I know there are simpler ways to do it than others (e.g., prepackaged curricula). But I still feel intimidated by the prospect of taking on the complete responsibility for my daughter's education.
If anyone has been in similar shoes before, I'd love to "chat" with you and learn how you worked through your conflicts about the situation.
Thanks!
Becky J
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Kathryn
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Hi Becky,
My oldest attended a wonderfully small, very Catholic, faith filled school for her 1st and 2nd grade year. Financially, they closed their doors at the end of her 2nd grade year and I was about 6 months pregnant w/ baby #3 and a son in the middle. I rushed as fast as I could to the local parish school which is where we attend church and enrolled both my oldest. Kind of like you, homeschool was in my peripheral vision (and always had been) but wasn't in the forefront of my mind at that point. I, again like you, felt the school my oldest attended was exactly what I wanted/she needed.
After 2 years at that school, this is my first year homeschooling. We still attend the church and the local parish school isn't "bad" it's just 26 kids per class and all that goes w/ a bureaucratic way of doing things. I was also overwhelmed w/ the number of parents who have their children in a Catholic school and yet aren't practicing Catholics and/or seemed to be lukewarm at best. It almost felt like it was supposed to be a "prestige" thing to attend this school and the price tag went along w/ it (or may be vice versa).
What I felt was lacking in a true immersion in the Catholic faith combined w/ the lack of personal attention (most esp. needed by my son but even my daughter too b/c she just kind of faded into the background) sent the idea of homeschooling straight to the front of my brain. Well, I really think it was the work of the Holy Spirit guiding me to do this for my children.
My oldest is 5th grade level and my son is 3rd grade level and then there's the wild and crazy 2 year old in the mix! It's been a challenge finding my way and getting things going. I realized at re-enrollment time last January that I prob. was not going to re-enroll them. I then started reading EVERYTHING I could find and researching all the different styles of schooling etc. After a very slow and stressful start (that's just kind of my personality), things are looking up.
What I did more than anything next to reading was PRAY, PRAY, PRAY. And then when I got stumped, I read and prayed some more. And now when I get stumped, I read and pray some more. Somehow, things seem to be working. Could be all that reading and prayer. 
Prayers to you as you discern God's path for you and may the Holy Spirit fill your heart with peace.
Best,
__________________
Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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Barb.b
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OHHH! Yes - that was after my ds first grade. The school was going to add a grade each year - they only had preschool, K and 1st. Well, they decided to slow down and not add 2nd. So we homeschooled 2nd grade. Now - ds is a junior in high school! And we have homeschooled the whole time! I hear you about the responsibility - but your daughter is young. Honestly, with homeshooling it is hard to mess up 1st grade. And you will grow with each year - take it one year at a time! People ask how I can teach the advanced maths of high school - I say I couldn't if I hadn't had years of teaching my kids math prior to high school. No matter what curriculum you use - kids thrive on the atmosphere and attention of homeschooling! I too was nervous - but they are my kids and once we started it seemed so natural!
Another thing - you are responsible for your child's education no matter what you choose. Weather a child is in public, parish or home school - the ultimate responsiblity will rest on you! Truthfully, I have found that responsiblity easier when I could be totally in charge - pick my childs curriculum and my approaches . . . that fit my child best!
Barb
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Barb.b
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| Posted: Dec 12 2009 at 7:16pm | IP Logged
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Kathryn wrote:
Hi Becky,
What I did more than anything next to reading was PRAY, PRAY, PRAY. And then when I got stumped, I read and prayed some more. And now when I get stumped, I read and pray some more. Somehow, things seem to be working. Could be all that reading and prayer.
Best, |
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I agree! The one thing homeschool is sure to do - is to give you more to pray about!
Oh, and it is nice to have our faith be a major part of our school. Not only in other "schools" are kids surrounded by lukewarm or secular people . . . but I found that the kids in some schools can be mean, rude . . . especially the girls. It has been so nice to be my kids main infuence (this by the way gets me on my knees in prayer most! - being my kids main influence!)
For a while ds was in public school in first grade (before I found the private one he went to). His teacher was horrible - she would put frown faces on kids work with a remark like: "is the the best you can do"! At open house she said something that made my heart drop into my stomach - she said that she would be spending more waking hours with my kids then us parents and she would know our kids better then we do! I think that was ds last week at that school before I pulled him out!
Barb
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Kathryn
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| Posted: Dec 12 2009 at 7:54pm | IP Logged
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Kathryn wrote:
I was also overwhelmed w/ the number of parents who have their children in a Catholic school and yet aren't practicing Catholics and/or seemed to be lukewarm at best.
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In pondering over this some more, I hope this didn't come across as judgmental and I wanted to clarify a little more. Compared to so many others, I myself could be considered lukewarm in my Catholic faith. I suppose really I had 3 signficant events occur in my life that moved me to a higher level of faith and understanding and I wanted to pass that on to my kids. It was hard to do w/ the hustle and bustle of being on someone else's clock. Also, I didn't see it happening at a level I believed it should have been even in the parish school b/c the secular view seemed to be so prevalent in so many people's lives and even in what was taught and expected of the children. Grades first, soul second? Well, I'm sure the administrators would disagree w/ that but when something feels that heavy on your heart and you see the physical manifestations in a child, it made me realize any teacher with 26 children could not possibly give my children what I could. Grades and homework sheets and who's running the carnival booth seemed so insignificant to me in meeting the ultimate goal of my children which is to serve the Lord and to serve others.
Now the challenge of weaving the 3 R's in there is where we're at now. 
__________________
Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Dec 12 2009 at 9:58pm | IP Logged
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Our circumstances were a bit different, but we fell into homeschooling due to changes in our life situation (we are military and move often). I had never, ever envisioned myself homeschooling. I didn't know anyone who homeschooled. (Well, I did, but I didn't find that out until we started considering it for our son. God moves in mysterious ways!)
We were sent to a military base with educational options that were unworkable for us. (Base school - good teachers, bad leadership. Catholic school - taught in Italian by nuns from other countries, not a good choice for shy ds.) I was sure I could not handle homeschooling, but there was really no other choice (I could have driven him to the next nearest American school, an hour each way, but, really!). I took it on as a temporary solution. He was beginning grade 5 and dd (4 at the time) was teaching herself to read.
I still worry about those basic things - responsibility for every part of education, getting into college, etc. - but my son is now a senior (at home) and we have managed. He is taking a college class and doing very, very well. (Whew!  )
To quote from my favorite movie of all time - "Where God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window." Making that great leap of faith into Planet Homeschool is scary, but homeschooling itself is very freeing. You and your children finally have the chance to be your true Catholic selves, and that is wonderful however it comes about. Taking up God's call to homeschool is one of the best things I have ever done for my own spiritual growth (and He had to call and call and call and call...I am a slow learner!).
Perhaps taking a look at some homeschooling materials will help you feel more comfortable? I know many moms who worry about being able to teach effectively, but there are so many wonderful options that are available that teaching (esp. in the early grades) is very straightforward.
I am praying for you, especially because I know how it feels to stare at that cliff and wonder if you should jump off, and what will happen if you do.
__________________
Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Becky Parker
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| Posted: Dec 14 2009 at 7:33am | IP Logged
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Becky,
That's close to how we started homeschooling. My ds attended a wonderful, small Catholic School. I actually was a teacher there. Because of budget problems the school had to close when my ds was in 2nd grade. We knew a wonderful family that homeschooled, and while they were (and still are) dear friends, at the time I thought I could never homeschool. (I have to admit, at that time I had that ridiculous "I am a professional teacher. Parents don't know how to teach" attitude   )
Anyway, my dh came home from work one day and said "why don't we homeschool?". I was trying to organize my cupboard of tupperware at the time and I remember saying "Are you nuts? I can't even get my cupboards organized?!" I was actually angry that he would even say such a thing. I knew that it not only meant joining the "fringe crowd" but I would also have to be a ... stay at home mom - gasp!
Well, after much prayer and begging the Lord to change my heart if this is what He truly wants, I agreed to it for a year. Wow, what a difference! I can't tell you the blessings that have come from being here at home with my children and teaching them on a daily basis. It's not always easy, but the entire family has grown so much stronger in our faith and in our beliefs about God wants us to be as a family.
Ask the Lord to give you his peace!
As far as curriculum goes, at first I would ease into things. There is so much out there it can be overwhelming. Don't even look at the Rainbow catalog!  You might want to go with workbooks for the basics and slowly build. Or maybe check into CHC or one of the other providers that will allow you to pick and choose what you need.
I have found that my curriculum choices change for each child. I would prefer to keep using the same thing, but it just never works that way for us. So, whatever you choose can be changed if you don't like it. Remember to just spend some time letting you and your child get used to the whole thing.
(And don't get discouraged if she keeps saying things like "but my teacher at school says..." Just remind her that you're the mom and God has given you great wisdom for your children!!) 
__________________
Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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Becky Parker
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| Posted: Dec 14 2009 at 7:39am | IP Logged
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Barb.b wrote:
At open house she said something that made my heart drop into my stomach - she said that she would be spending more waking hours with my kids then us parents and she would know our kids better then we do!
Barb |
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 Wow, that's upsetting. I don't even know what to say except if a teacher had said that to me I would pull him out the next day too! The sad thing is, I know there are teachers out there that actually believe that ... and maybe in some situations it true.
__________________
Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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Elena
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Becky J wrote:
But I still feel intimidated by the prospect of taking on the complete responsibility for my daughter's education.
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It might help to keep it in perspective - you'd be teaching 1st grade! First grade is FUN!! Learning to read and easy math and lots of stories and fun science experiments and reading fun history stories and art and music - it's a blast!!
after that just take it year by year. 
__________________
Elena
Wife to Peter, mom of many!
My Domestic Church
One Day at a Time
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Becky J
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| Posted: Dec 17 2009 at 12:48pm | IP Logged
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Thank you, everyone, for your kind and helpful thoughts!
Becky
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: Struggling with the homeschool decision
