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Leocea
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| Posted: March 19 2009 at 6:22pm | IP Logged
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I need major advice!!
My son is 15 and in 10th grade. We have always homeschooled. When he was little, we mostly unschooled with lots of reading and nature. As he grew, we have used a variety of different materials. We have never stressed tests, or grades, even in math. He is on a robotics team that is headed to the world finals in April, and has taught himself to play the drums and guitar very well. So, he can focus on some things, and succeed.
A very good friend of mine volunteered to handle Apologia Biology with him this year, along with her son and one or two others. She has spent a lot of time, even before and after adding a seventh child to her family this school year, writing syllabus's, teaching them for hours, teaching them study skills, and getting them ready for test taking. She has gone above and beyond what I would have expected.
Well, so far, the boys have taken two tests, and neither received higher than a 40% on either one. She then spent more time working with them, and they still didn't improve. He insists he studied, but it is apparent that he didn't. She is very upset that they are not taking her seriously, and that he may fail!
I am now questioning if my homeschooling style is detrimental to him. He has an attitude of "well, I'll just be a manual laborer like dad", which he is not inclined toward either, due to motivation!! He is actually interested in engineering, which he knows requires a lot of schooling! We intended him to go to the community college and then transfer if needed. Most of what I read about homeschooling in high school seemed to indicate that the student will learn what they need to know when they need to know it. I don't see this happening, and I am worried that he will be living here at 30!!!
Please help me put this in perspective, and share what has worked for you or others. How can I help him with his motivation? How can I tell if he indeed does have a problem?What can I do with my other children, who are in 5th grade and under, to avoid these problems?
Thank you so much!!
In Christ,
Leocea
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Natalia
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| Posted: March 19 2009 at 7:34pm | IP Logged
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Leocea,
He is not the only one that hasn't gotten a good grade. You mentioned that none of the other boys did. So maybe it is the material that is the problem, or the way the material is being presented or, maybe he doesn't test well. What kind of test was it? was it an objective kind of test (multiple choice, etc). Could you test him yourself, maybe asking for some oral narrations?
Maybe he doesn't like Biology and finds it difficult to motivate himself to study. Biology is not a big part of engineering, but one of those necessary things. The fact that he is doing poorly in Biology doesn't mean he can't do well in thing that interest him. I don't think test are good predictors of success in life anyhow...
Does that help to put it into perspective? 
__________________
Natalia
http://pannuestrodecadadia.blogspot.com
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stellamaris
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| Posted: March 19 2009 at 8:24pm | IP Logged
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Well, it has been my experience that 15 is a very lacksidaisical age for boys. They seem to have a lot of trouble with motivation for some reason at this stage. I myself have the theory that they are growing so much and physically changing so rapidly, that that's about all they can manage. So, I wouldn't extrapolate too much from where he is today to where he will be a few years from now. If he has no experience with regular-style classes and tests, now would be a good time to work with him on various study techniques. How is he studying? Does he know how to outline, use flash cards, make visual graphics that summarize information? Does he know how to identify important information using subtitles, headings, and chapter questions? You can teach him how to study, and this will be of more help to him than the classroom material itself.
Don't panic...I personally feared that all my three older boys would grow up to live a life on the streets as some kind of bum when they were that age, and you know what?, not one of them has! They are all responsible, decent citizens who even did well in college. Believe me, there were times I despaired of such a good outcome! Keep up your good effort to teach and form your son, and you will be rewarded with a terrific young man.
__________________
In Christ,
Caroline
Wife to  dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
Flowing Streams
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guitarnan
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| Posted: March 19 2009 at 9:17pm | IP Logged
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I'm right with you...my husband assures me that most teen boys are pretty lazy and need to learn to self-motivate. My son (17) does as little as he thinks he can get away with. When he's not paying attention he makes careless errors. When he really studies and proofreads/checks his work, he gets A's and B's.
One thing that has consistently helped him is practice tests. (That is the only thing I don't like about Teaching Textbooks - only 1 version of each test - with Jacobs I used the second version as his practice test.) Perhaps this could help him.
Does he take study notes or highlight his book? (I prefer study notes; they work well for me and I can resell the book.) This is another good way to review and retain material. He really needs to discover his study style (all alone, with notes, with a study buddy, etc.) and play to that strength when tackling tough subjects like bio.
I worry about my son's motivation, too, so please don't feel all alone. I was a totally driven, hard charging student, so I can't understand the go-along-to-get-along method at all and I get very frustrated.
Bio isn't necessary for engineering (except as a prereq for college entrance) and your son can be an excellent engineer without knowing every phylum out there. It sounds like his talents lie in that area, and he's done a lot that you can be very proud of. He does need to have decent math skills, of course, but he'll probably figure out that math is a means to his desired end and work hard just to get the math over with.
I'm not trying to blow off the current issue, just put it into perspective. (My dad is an engineer...with a Ph.D...and he has not needed to know much pure bio for any of his jobs.)
Another thing to think about is how the final grade is to be calculated. Are there other assignments? Lab write-ups? Quizzes? Those should all count toward a grade. It's March, so I would think that there should have been either other assignments or a few more tests, like one per module/chapter? Sometimes you have to play to other strengths (like weekly assignments and labs) when you aren't doing well on tests, PLUS study more, with a view toward maxing out your scores in those non-test components of your grade. (That is how I passed computer programming in college - I couldn't finish the last 2 programs but I completely aced the final, so I passed anyway.)
I hope this helps a little. Your son won't be begging on street corners if he can build robots, really...I sure wish I could do what he can - it would be more useful than all the bio stuff I know.
__________________
Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Bookswithtea
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| Posted: March 20 2009 at 3:22pm | IP Logged
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Like everyone else said, part of this is boys at this age, definitely. Very frustrating. 
Also, Apologia tests are very difficult, imho. We used their physical science. We won't be using their materials again.
I bet you, though, that the biggest issue is simply not being used to studying for tests like this. He probably studies (as in, he *puts time in*) but doesn't really know where to focus his energy. If you want to see him improve his grades, then I would look at the test ahead of time, and then give him a study guide for awhile, helping him to focus his studying. Then later teach him to make his own study guides off his notes and the chapters.
Also, my mantra with my 15 yr old sophomore boy this year has been, "It doesn't matter how many hours you put in studying. What matters is if you know the material well. It may not be enough to study for 3 hrs. Its enough when you know it like the back of your hand."
I am not a fun mommy these days...sigh... 
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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Leocea
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| Posted: March 21 2009 at 6:59am | IP Logged
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Thank you to all of you!
I know that this is not the end of the world. It is just that he is almost halfway through high school, and I am wondering if I have done the right thing.
I am planning on working on some study skills with him, and possibly having him take a class on study skills at the local community college.
I just didn't have issues like this when I was in school. The only time I didn't do well was when I was depressed, and missed a lot of school. I generally picked up things quickly, so this is new to me.
Your suggestions are very helpful. I will share them with my friend, too. I feel less stressed now!
In Christ,
Leocea
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: Will my son make it in the real world?!?!
