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Tina P.
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| Posted: Sept 21 2008 at 11:50pm | IP Logged
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Just having finished week three of school and I'm just slightly stressed. I'm having a hard time getting my oldest to write his papers on time and in an organized manner (shame on me for not requiring more writing earlier). Someone always slides without having to do all that's required of them (which is not so very much from my 12 yod on down) on a daily basis. The school day stretches on forever. And fine arts, as always seems to happen, is suffering. I haven't been able to relax since day one and we're already BEHIND! 
On the positive side of things, the baby seems to be outgrowing her fussiness.
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
Mary's Muse
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cornomama4
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| Posted: Sept 22 2008 at 1:34am | IP Logged
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Gee, Tina, I can't imagine why you're stressed 
Just the fact that you're even attempting school so soon after the baby is amazing!
Your blog post from the 17th seems like your heart knows what's important right now, even if your head is playing task-master. Are you BEHIND according to an outside schedule (online school or something?) or is this pressure self-impossed?
I only ask because, if you can, you might just let yourself be "behind" and enjoy this special time. You even seem to mention that babies can sense when you're rushed (lactation post). Maybe Etu is saying "Hey, wait a minute! I just got here, slow down and let me catch up!"
Also, are your kids doing their fair share of helping you in the daily tasks of life? Sounds like you have a few who are at the age to reinstitute "dust" as a verb rather than a noun
I'm sure my advice is pretty lame, since I only have 4, but with #4 I really hit a wall. It took me about 9 months to realize I had maxed out (I was still working at the time) and I really had to "slash and burn" in the HS expectations, the outside commitments, the work schedule, etc. I had to realize that no matter what any "scope and sequence" said about where my kids should be academically, and no matter what the career risks I might take by going into "semi-retirement", I needed to lay a foundation for the newest little guy of a calm, loving, relaxed environment. And I was also able to spend a little extra time with each older child, especially the toddler, so they knew they were still precious to me. Somehow, for those weeks, their emotional needs superceded any obligation to an arbitrary academic schedule.
Of course, then we must all get back on track and get on with life, but I highly recommend the New Baby Chautaqua! Like you said, it's only such a short time....
Good luck! And BTW, let the Fine Arts slide! The last thing you want is for them to associate art and music with a stressed and frantic mommy. Fine Art for the young is best done by "strewing" things about, IMHO. It needs to be experienced physically and emotionally at first. Art books out, random Classical music playing (occasionally), etc. OK, I'll stop now 
cm4
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Natalia
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| Posted: Sept 22 2008 at 6:27am | IP Logged
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It always seems to take at least 4 weeks for our school to find its rhythm and for the kids to adjust. I have been doing this for 10 years now and it is always the same but somehow it always stresses and discourages me. You think after so many years I should see the pattern! Anyhow, hang in there and give it time. Y'all will adjust!
I try not to make any major changes right away. I try to give what I originally planned at least a month. My kids find it upsetting when I keep changing the way we do things. After the first month, I sit down and evaluate what is working and what is not and adjust accordingly. This year I already know I will have have to make some changes. One thing I am determined to stick to, though, is our poetry teatime. Last year we ended up cutting out almost all fine arts and I felt the lack of beauty sorely.
Be encouraged sister!
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Natalia
http://pannuestrodecadadia.blogspot.com
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Sept 22 2008 at 6:49am | IP Logged
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Natalia wrote:
It always seems to take at least 4 weeks for our school to find its rhythm and for the kids to adjust. I have been doing this for 10 years now and it is always the same but somehow it always stresses and discourages me. You think after so many years I should see the pattern! Anyhow, hang in there and give it time. Y'all will adjust!
I try not to make any major changes right away. I try to give what I originally planned at least a month. My kids find it upsetting when I keep changing the way we do things. After the first month, I sit down and evaluate what is working and what is not and adjust accordingly. This year I already know I will have have to make some changes. One thing I am determined to stick to, though, is our poetry teatime. Last year we ended up cutting out almost all fine arts and I felt the lack of beauty sorely.
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Natalia's words are wise, Tina. I do the same thing.. Sending many prayers for you! I'm so familiar with the treading water thing!!!
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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TracyQ
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| Posted: Sept 22 2008 at 1:08pm | IP Logged
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Oh Jennifer,
Your blog entry is fantastic! I'm going to share it with my support groups! Very well done, and oh, so true! Thank you! I especially loved this part:
"Back off the idea of perfection. Open your heart to the reality of your home, your children, your limitations, and sit down with a cup of tea. It's time to re-assess. Give yourself permission to spend the entire first month in re-assess mode. Gently ease into your plans with the knowledge that something here isn't going to work. You're in the dressing room so to speak. Some things will fit, some won't."
Thanks again for sharing it! 
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Blessings and Peace,
Tracy Q.
wife of Marty for 20 years, mom of 3 wonderful children (1 homeschool graduate, 1 12th grader, and a 9th grader),
homeschooling in 15th year in Buffalo, NY
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lilac hill
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| Posted: Sept 22 2008 at 1:22pm | IP Logged
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Tina P. wrote:
| Just having finished week three of school and I'm just slightly ... I'm having a hard time getting my oldest to write his papers on time and in an organized manner (shame on me for not requiring more writing earlier). |
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Tina--
Not shame on you 
I imagine you were working on other skills and perhaps this is the year for writing.
I have found that we seem to have a yearly/semester focus--math, writing, art, caring for Grandma ,whatever. I has been too exhausting to have too many areas that needed work and has resulted in miserable burnout when I did not simplify my focus areas.
I hope for a better week.
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Viv
Wife to Rick (7/83), Mom to dd#1(6/87), dd#2(1/90), and dd#3(6/94) in central PA.
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Tina P.
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| Posted: Oct 04 2008 at 9:17am | IP Logged
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cornomama4 wrote:
Are you BEHIND according to an outside schedule (online school or something?) or is this pressure self-impossed?
I only ask because, if you can, you might just let yourself be "behind" and enjoy this special time. You even seem to mention that babies can sense when you're rushed (lactation post). Maybe Etu is saying "Hey, wait a minute! I just got here, slow down and let me catch up!" |
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I have a highschooler and this is really the first year I feel the pressure to prepare him for college. I tend to let things slide  that shouldn't because if I'm not physically running around, my mind is! This happens especially when the kids get stuck in an area ... probably the WORST time to let a topic go.
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Also, are your kids doing their fair share of helping you in the daily tasks of life? Sounds like you have a few who are at the age to reinstitute "dust" as a verb rather than a noun
I'm sure my advice is pretty lame, |
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No, your advice is not lame. But we *do* incorporate chores into our school day, though I admit sometimes life gets in the way.
For art appreciation, I read a short book about the artist (even to my 14 yo!), place some of that artist's work on the fridge, and then have the kids do a project based on the artist's work when we can find something for them to do. I do essentially the same for music, minus the project. However, my husband has iPodded (can that qualify as a verb?) all our music except classical. I'm ignorant as to how to do that, so we are musically starved. Hopefully, he'll make it more of a priority soon.
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
Mary's Muse
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