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Natalia
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| Posted: April 26 2005 at 3:45pm | IP Logged
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to unschooling, than others either by temperament or age?
I think that stepping back and letting my 11 yo dd take more control of her education would be good thing. I think it would reduce some of the tensions between us and I think it will let us focus more on our relationship and enjoy each other more . But honestly I don't know where to begin.
Did you unschool from the beginning? If not, how did you make the change? Where did you begin? Was it a gradual change or a radical one?
Natalia
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Leonie
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Natalia,
I think of unschooling a little bit like our time when our sons were preschoolers - they worked alongside me, we read together, watched kids videos together, did cooking and crafts. I left out games and puzzles and lego. I took them to the park and on outings. We painted.
If we can do some of these things for a time, with our older dc, instead of thinking in subjects, then we can get to know our dc a little more, their strengths and weaknesses, passions and interests.
And know ourselves a bit better, too!
Leonie in Sydney
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Elizabeth
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| Posted: April 26 2005 at 7:26pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Leonie! I love this analogy!
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Mary G
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This, to me is the beauty of homeschooling -- doing what YOU (as the parent) think is best for YOUR child at the time -- for instance, my almost 14yo daughter is very ready to set her own curriculum -- my almost 16 yo is not -- he's too into what is easiest, what is coolest and doesn't understand the results of such behavior.
To some extent, my 6 yo does dictate what we do as he's the "oldest" of the littles -- we have a 6 ,a 5, and a (very rambunctious) 2 year old, so the 6 yoear old does dictate what we will learn as the others aren't really in "school" yet.
But, again,t hat's the beauty of homeschooling -- adapting YOUR schoolroom to YOUR children, rather than to the state-dictated curriculum.....
Blessings all!
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MaryG
3 boys (22, 12, 8)2 girls (20, 11)
my website that combines my schooling, hand-knits work, writing and everything else in one spot!
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juliecinci
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The way we started was to give kids some time to "deschool." Intially with a couple kids that meant lots of TV and game time on the computers. But for two of my kids, it meant that they gradually stopped doing workbooks or organized curricula as they felt more and more freedom to do what they wanted to do.
To begin, I would suggest a library trip (check out books of interest) and videos. I love watching movies and documentaries with my kids. Something about viewing together creates conversations and a relaxed atmostphere (if you've been highly structured before).
Also, we have always had teatimes with poetry and read alouds and this continued unabated. We did some field trips right off the bat too to get out of the house and to stimulate new directions for reading, etc.
The biggest switch isn't in what you do as much as how you feel about what you don't do. That takes time so give yourself some permission to do only one thing at a time. You might just drop a workbook (without some big announcement) and ask what your daughter would like to do instead during that time. Notice her interests and then follow up on them with a book, class, time to explore it with you, playing together... and so on. The mistake I made was to make a big announcement - we are now unschooling. That was a bit distressing for my more structured kids at the time. I wish now that we had gradually let workbooks and schedules go while replacing these with LIFE -interests and books.
Julie
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Homeschooling five for fourteen years
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Willa
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Natalia --
Leonie has talked about how she meets with her kids, weekly or daily or seasonally, to help them set goals and ask for their ideas, thoughts and plans. That bit of advice has been helpful to me in helping my older kids take more of the reins in their education. In fact, I need to do it again with my 16yo who's a little demoralized right now as he contemplates his future calling in life as an adult.
She also, I think, mentioned that it may take more than one talk if you have a quiet kid (I do) or a kid who is used to being told what to do. In other words, it's a transition process and it's an interaction. They will want to see if you follow up on their ideas -- checking books or videos out of the library, making time for their ideas, and so on. Summer might be a good time to experiment with this. We've had some really interesting educational odysseys during those more leisurely months. One time my second son read REAMS on US History -- probably more than I would have included in a whole year's curriculum. He still remembers a lot of it too. Last year my daughter wanted to learn to sew. We had a blast learning together and she now sews her own clothes. The relationship building and the interests carry over to the future.
Also, now talking as a more classical/CM structured person but one who also believes very much in children "owning" their learning, I ask for feedback on books I give them or new materials we are using. One way to learn what your kids think of the materials they are presently using, and what changes they would make, is simply to ask. Often, really, I don't have to ask but it IS valuable to have their thoughts on their own education! and when I ask, it helps them organize their own thoughts about what learning is about rather than just reflexively complaining about work.
The last thing that I've found helpful in my periodic forays into unschooling is to simply watch the kids. This is sort of tied into what Leonie said about just continuing preschool, but for me, I had to make a commitment to do the watching and the strewing and the involvement, because the kind of mom I am, when the kids are happily occupied I buzz off to do something by myself (see, I'm doing it now!). I used to keep little notebooks jotting down what they were doing (because I like to write and record-keep) and it was surprising to me how it all added up and how it helped me see what might interest them from there.
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Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
Take Up and Read
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always_learning
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| Posted: April 28 2005 at 10:11pm | IP Logged
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Natalia wrote:
to unschooling, than others either by temperament or age?
Did you unschool from the beginning? If not, how did you make the change? Where did you begin? Was it a gradual change or a radical one?
Natalia |
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Hi Natalia,
I started out as a flexible educator, looking for teachable moments. I judged that we did need a plan - the scope and sequence was the non-negotiable  When I first heard the term un-schooling - I thought, "How totally bizarre!" I believe where we are now is either a big lesson in humility or proof that God does have a good chuckle now and again. We stopped schooling when life threw us a pretty big loop, and when it was all said and done I suddenly realized that my girls learned more without direct intervention than with it. In some ways the change was gradual, then again, it really wasn't a very big change  . I can relate to what Julie said - the biggest change for me wasn't what we did, it was my perception of things. I no longer see my children in a certain grade and I no longer worry whether or not they are at the same level as their ps peers.
The girls (8 and 10) do choose their own curriculum. Sometimes they choose more academic pursuits than others. Every once in a blue moon they may do a lapbook. Or they may have a bit of competition as to who can get more math pages done. They may actually finish a whole Miquon workbook in one year  Where do we start? Often with a book we're either reading aloud or listening to on tape. Other times, with something that piques their interest from out in the real world. I've often wondered if some personalities are inherently better suited for unschooling. In the end, after observing my dc and my sister's, I've come to the conclusions that there will be times when they want you to take a much more active role in their learning and other times, when they want you to step back. For me, it is hard to sit on my hands when I want to step in and help, and they are on an independent streak.
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Beate, mommy to:
dd(10), dd(8), ds(5), dd(3), and dd (1)
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tovlo4801
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juliecinci wrote:
| The mistake I made was to make a big announcement - we are now unschooling. That was a bit distressing for my more structured kids at the time. I wish now that we had gradually let workbooks and schedules go while replacing these with LIFE -interests and books. |
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As you can probably tell by all my posts and questions to the unschooling section, I'm very seriously considering some form of unschooling for our family. I tested the waters with my ds this afternoon and just wanted to share my experience. My immediate reaction to his response was that he might be one of those kids not well suited to unschooling. In a rather panicked voice, he told me that he wouldn't know what to do if I wasn't telling him what to do. He said that he would have a hard time without small parameters. (yes - he actually used the words small parameters!)
I was a little stunned. As I considered his response, I began to realize that he definitely needs to be let free. He obviously see's school as something that he needs to get done so he can do fun things. One of my goals for homeschooling was that my kids realized education was not something that ended at a certain time of the day or when the textbook closed. Obviously my current method has not been terribly successful at this.
After that conversation I jumped over here and happened to re-read Julie's post. I think her advice about proceeding slowly is obviously good advice. My ds was certainly distressed!
After considering our little exchange, I'm thinking that unschooling is well-suited even for my type of child, but maybe it just needs to approached slightly differently for different temperments.
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: Are some kids better suited (Unschooling)
