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DianaCatherine
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| Posted: July 16 2012 at 1:00pm | IP Logged
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Hi,
I am new here. We part time homeschool our 15 year old. He takes some classes at the local Catholic high school.
Of course, there are always comments. One kind of bothered me, insinuating I am too involved in his work and just wanted to get an idea of how others homeschool teenagers. Like how involved are you. Does your teen choose his own curriculum. How much do you teach and check work. If he takes a class somewhere else, like a highschool or a college class, how much do you check or involve yourself in it.
Also, does anyone know of any good Catholic homeschooling websites or books that discuss homeschooling teens?
Thanks
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SallyT
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| Posted: July 17 2012 at 9:05am | IP Logged
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Hm, well, personally, I tend to be pretty hands-off once we've decided on a course of study. I do have conversations with my high-schooler about what he's going to be doing, some of which is negotiable, and some of which is not -- for example, everyone does our 4-year literature/history cycle, which takes them from the earliest myths to the contemporary era, because I believe that there are just some things you do and books you read in high school, to finish as an educated person! (my kids are all very familiar with my my soapbox in this area, and they just know that this is the deal). We discuss math programs, though obviously doing the requisite math credits is non-negotiable. We discuss choices of foreign language, electives, sciences, etc, and the student has a far greater level of input here.
In other words, we do a good deal of collaboration on the front end, because I do want a given child's course of study to accommodate interests and inclinations and to be generally appropriate for that child. I also want the student to feel and take ownership of his education, though as I said, some things he just has to accept as givens (I prefer to think of them as gifts, from the Trove of Maternal Wisdom).
Then I write up plans, fairly detailed, but on a weekly basis, so that the student sets his own daily schedule of work. Work is due on Fridays: reading journals, math problem sets/tests for the week, papers written, and so on. My kids check their own math answers, and I check off that all of that is done. I read and comment on papers. Otherwise I'm just looking to be sure that work is getting done, and that it's getting done carefully. Unless the student has a particular question or need, that is all I do.
My kids have also done outside classes at the college where my husband teaches. It has been my policy not to be involved in these classes, except in the role of tutor when, for example, a paper is due and the student needs someone to read it over and help with revision. Otherwise, I direct the student to consult the teacher for the class for help. This, as I've found with my first college student, is a very good college-preparatory skill. In general, part of the learning experience of these classes is that of taking responsibility for the work, in the knowledge that whether he sinks or swims is up to him. Again, this is preparation for college, where that will certainly be the case (although, full disclosure: my college student still sends me her papers to read and comment on before she does a final draft, so it's not like I'm totally the cut-the-apron-strings type).
As my kids get older (beginning in middle school, I guess, really), I emphasize self-teaching a LOT. Being able to learn, proactively, is an invaluable skill, and it's a huge part of my homeschooling philosophy. So this is where I'm coming from. Thus far I have not had a problem with my kids' willingness to do the necessary work -- not that they don't grumble sometimes, but by high school they have a pretty decent idea of where they might be heading with their education, and they understand that their work now is a stepping stone to the next phase. They also seem to respond positively to my trust in their ability to learn and get it done -- the less I hang over them, the better their motivation level.
Your mileage may vary, of course. But I wouldn't take someone else's comments about your "involvement" as a barometer for your homeschooling. That person may well just assume that because your son is learning at home, Mama must be doing it all for him.
One resource which has helped me, though we don't use it exclusively as a homeschooling plan, is CHC's High School of Your Dreams. It is pricey for what it is (though personally I find the resources very helpful), but especially the first time around, I appreciated their preparatory exercises (starting with your 7th grader, visualizing where they want to be after high school, etc) and their templates for things like schedules, transcripts, and so on.
There's also a College4CathHS yahoo group which is very helpful for discussions related to preparation for college, the admissions process, and other similar topics. Obviously you'd find a lot of other Catholic homeschoolers with teenagers there, and a lot of good conversation.
Hope this helps! Must go clean house now . . .
Sally
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Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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sunshinyliving
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| Posted: July 18 2012 at 9:18am | IP Logged
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Involvement in teen’s work:
I think a parent’s involvement depends mostly on their goals for high-school education and the student’s abilities and personal character. I think that appropriate involvement can vary widely depending on those three factors.
I guess you could say that I am quite "hands-on" when it comes to homeschooling my high-schoolers. High school is where it gets fun for me as a teacher :-)
Like Sally, I have my kids learn how to self-teach during the middle years. The middle years are dedicated to improving skills and learning material.
However, an incoming freshman should already be proficient in all of the basic skills, including study skills. Now is the time for her to put on her thinking-cap and really interact with the worldviews and underlying assumptions in many of her subject areas. In my opinion, there is only so much interaction that a young adult can have by herself with her book. I think the higher level student really needs to have a teacher, an involved person who helps them refine their thinking, who challenges them and points out perhaps unseen flaws or beauties. I find the interaction between my high-schoolers and me to be so valuable during this time in their lives. There is so much to discuss, learn, and enjoy together.
Bottom line: you know your child and how he learns. If you think your involvement is beneficial to him, be involved. If you think that it is hindering his development or self-discipline, lessen your level of involvement.
Does teen choose his own curriculum:
My high-schoolers have several classes that are non-negotiables. I have very precise goals as to what I want accomplished in their lives and education during this time and I feel it is my duty to make sure these goals are met. They have very little input here.
On the other hand, they also take classes in areas they choose. In these areas they have a lot of control over what/how they are going to learn.
How involved are you in teen’s outside classes:
My daughters have taken several online courses. One daughter does not need my involvement at all. Occasionally I’ll have her show or tell me what she’s doing, but otherwise I leave it up to her. My other daughter needs more of my help. I help her until she understands.
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Diana, wife to Brad, Mom to dd18, dd16, dd13, ds10, dd7, ds5
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JennyMaine
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| Posted: July 18 2012 at 10:28am | IP Logged
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DianaCatherine,
It sounds like maybe you were being criticized for your involvement in your teen's daily life? Personally, I often see parents who I feel are way too hands-off with their teens. I'd rather see involved parents any day! (I always said that if I could only homeschool for either K-8 or high school, I'd do it for high school. Fortunately, we've been able to homeschool all the way. But I think parents are needed even more during the teen years.)
I would say that I am very involved in my teens' daily work. I often sit with my son, for example, and we work through all his algebra problems together. I might go over his Accounting lesson with him and walk him through the steps of completing the worksheets. Writing skills are a struggle for him, so I'm often at his elbow while he types up a book analysis, narration, or essay answer. We study his Religion lessons together, doing lots of the exercises orally. I check his work throughout the day, as he does it. I work p.t. and on those days I review the work when I get home - usually while eating dinner!
My daughter is a very social person who benefits from the interaction we have daily with her course work as well. While she is older, I still don't expect her to be completely self-motivated nor to work independently for all things. Some classes and assignments are done independently, but not all. My teens just don't learn well that way.
Oh, and I do let them have some input on the classes and materials we use, but some things I just insist upon.
If you search, you might find some good convention talks on teens from the IHM homeschool conventions as MP3 or cds? Here is a link - IHM Talks
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--JennyMaine, Mom to Catherine (17) and Sam (15) "The countenance is a reflection of the soul. You should always have a calm and serene countenance." -- Therese of Lisieux
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DianaCatherine
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| Posted: July 18 2012 at 7:22pm | IP Logged
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Thank you all for your replies. They really helped. Sometimes I get the feeling I am too involved and then other times I feel not involved enough. When I was pregnant with my son I remember an older woman telling me that the teenage years are the years your children will need you the most. It is just hard sometimes to find that balance and when some don't agree with your homeschooling ideas, well you know, it makes you question yourself.
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SallyT
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| Posted: July 18 2012 at 9:11pm | IP Logged
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Hm, maybe I should qualify what I said a little, since on rereading, I realize that while I am fairly hands-off where formal school is concerned, I'm very hands-on in *parenting* my teenagers, which in some sense is where my role as teacher happens. I've learned to stay up late, for instance, because that's when my teenagers like to talk! Over dinner and late at night are when we talk about what they're interested in, a lot of which arises from what they're reading -- my rising 9th grader is interested in bacteriology, for example, and keeps checking these book about germs out of the library, so when we talk, a lot of that is his telling me about what he's read. My now-college student and I have always talked a lot about literature. Of course we talk about disciplines which aren't our first loves, too, but one of the things I most enjoy about my teenagers is that, as they become more and more well-read and develop specific and sometimes surprising interests, they're a lot of fun to talk to, and book talk is of interest to them.
So actually, in Charlotte-Mason parlance, I do do a lot of listening to narrations -- just at informal and unscheduled times. Though I was a classroom teacher in a former life, I find that my role for my high-schoolers thus far has been to be more of a facilitator, a listener, a sounding board, and a collegial cheerleader for their enthusiasms. Well, that, and the person who makes them read The Iliad . . .
Anyway, as others have said, you know your own child best. Some high-schoolers are ready to be very self-motivated and independent, and some aren't at the outset. A lot of maturing happens, too, between 9th and 12th grades, so that you may find yourself adjusting your level of involvement over time. It always seems that just as you find that perfect balance, things change!
Sally
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Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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4Real Forums : High School Years and Beyond
Topic: Involved in teen's work
