4Real Forums: chore expectations for older teens

Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.

Active Topics || Favorites || Member List || Search || About Us || Help || Register || Login

Planning and Ordering our Days
4Real Forums : Planning and Ordering our Days

Topic: chore expectations for older teens

Author

Message

<< Prev Topic | Next Topic >>

setonmom
Forum Pro

Joined: Jan 25 2011
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 134

Posted: Feb 24 2011 at 7:28am \| IP Logged

My two oldest are 18 and almost 16. I expect an hour a day of focused work in terms of chores. Do you think this is reasonable? 18 year old has laundry duty- I have timed this job myself and it takes an hour a day to wash , sort, fold, and put away the days laundry ( usually two loads). 18yo has a heavy courseload, and is a good student, very involved in other things ( youth groups, etc) and we're having problems getting the laundry done. 16 year old used to have after breakfast and after lunch kitchen duty. It would take her so long to do the after lunch job it drove me crazy. The haranguing her to do the job was destroying my relationship with her, and causing me tremendous stress with my kitchen a wreck all afternoon. So, now I do the kitchen job and she takes care of the toddler for an hour each day. ( Which she does very well) . My kitchen is cleaner than ever. Just wondering what other moms expect from older teens and if what I expect seems reasonable.

hylabrook1
Forum Moderator

Joined: July 09 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5980

Posted: Feb 24 2011 at 10:30am \| IP Logged

Your expectations sound reasonable to me. One way we continue to get around-the-house chores done as the older children become more active outside the home is to switch things up according to the young person's schedule. Say, if the 18 yo works at a job on Thursdays, the laundry job for Thursday goes to someone else (including Mom as a possible *someone*). I guess we break things down both as to task and day so that all of the chores are covered, just not necessarily by the same person every day. Does that make sense?

Peace,
Nancy

Kristie 4
Forum All-Star

Joined: June 20 2006
Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1508

Posted: Feb 24 2011 at 10:39am \| IP Logged

My 13yo and 16yo do their own laundry, sheets, and rooms and help with dinner dishes when they are here. It just seems like between their schoolwork, activities and wierd sleeping schedules that to ask more wouldn't give them much down time (but I struggle with this as they have always done lots around the house).

__________________
Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!

A Walk in the Woods

Angie Mc
Board Moderator

Joined: Jan 31 2005
Location: Arizona
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 11400

Posted: Feb 26 2011 at 10:24am \| IP Logged

I don't know if an hour is unreasonable...but it may not be flexible enough.

We ask our high school aged teens to take care of their room daily and to pick up after themselves as much as possible in family spaces (wash snack plates, tend to personal care products in bathroom, etc.) For additional chores, we look for flexibility. Our 15yo takes garbage from home (mainly kitchen) to curb twice a week (5yo collects indoor garbage.) He can set the can out the night before or the morning of. He also cleans the bathrooms once a week - Friday or Saturday. Dh leaves a list of tasks to do as well...change lightbulbs, check pool chemicals, etc. that he can do during breaks.

I love your example of working out a relationship saving option with your dd - I identify! I shared a similar experience here at the topic, serving teens.

ETA: We have a family "transition" time between day and evening, M-F. Depending on the day, it lands between 4:00 and 6:30. We try to catch a time when EVERYONE is home - including teens

. We pick up the van, garage, house, yard...as fast as possible for 20 minutes. That really helps our home to stay in order.

Love,

__________________
Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
About Me

If you wish to post a reply to this topic you must first login
If you are not already registered you must first register

[Add this topic to My Favorites]

Printable version

Forum Jump

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot create polls in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum

Hosting and Support provided by theNetSmith.com