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Elizabeth
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So often, we hear that homeschooling is a journey. Along the way, we meet so many people and so many ideas. Some of those people influence us profoundly and some ideas we discard. There is great joy in the journey. Share with us the journey and tell us how you arrived here (even if you are just stopping along the way).
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Angie Mc
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When I was in a lack-luster high school, I was told I was college material and asked if I wanted to be a nurse or a teacher. Seeing as I didn't dig blood, I went for teaching  . Once at college, I quickly learned that I didn't quite fit. A sign of things to come happened during a teaching prep class. We were asked what our goals for teaching were. After hearing all the ususal answers, I said, I'd like to start my own school! The silence in the room was deafening 
I didn't even HEAR about the option of home education until my oldest was two. We lived in a community with a highly active bunch of homeschoolers (Davis, CA.) I was on a walk with dd when I stopped in my tracks and thought, "I need to homeschool. Oh no. How do I tell my husband?" You see, before we had children we were way off of God's will for us. I thought I would have a baby, go back to work, and live the same life as all of my peers. All changed when I held my precious baby in my arms. I told my husband shortly after her birth that "I won't leave her!" Well...this lead to all sorts of lifestyle changes to accomodate me staying home...but staying home was only supposed to be temporary, until she started pre-school
More lifestyle changes and we were off on our home education path and haven't looked back! I truly see choosing homeschooling as our path back to God and to our Catholic faith.
This is the start of our journey. I'll be back to share stories about the people and experiences that have most influenced our home education.
Thanks for asking, Elizabeth. I'll look forward to hearing other family's stories.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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TracyQ
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Oh my goodness, when I read this, and started thinking about it, I suddenly realized how far along in the journey were are, and how long we've been journeying! It doesn't SEEM like it could be 10 years already! 
We began when we put our oldest son, now 14yo in preschool. We liked the preschool, and so did he. We loved the teachers, and there was no problem. In fact, I had planned to be PTA president, and to be very involved in my children's school and education before we even were given the gift of children! 
I only had one family in our huge extended family that homeschooled, my brother's family, and we thought they were *crazy*, and were the only vocal ones to ask them questions, etc., and to wonder WHY in the world someone would choose that method of education? Wow! God has a sense of humor, doesn't He??? 
Through Jake's preschool year, the Lord began working on my heart, and needling me to look into homeschooling. There was so much Jake was doing in preschool that I wanted to be doing with him, and I just wanted so much to be more of a part of that part of his life! I wanted to teach him to read, and I wanted to teach him to add, etc. But homeschooling? Nah! That was just too much to think about, what a HUGE committment, and it just wasn't *normal*. 
So as we had to make the decision about what we were going to do, the Lord stepped it up a notch, and really began making it very clear to me that He wanted our family to homeschool. I began to research it, and pray about it, and I was really in a dilemma. Part of me wanted to be completely obedient, and just say yes, and the other part of me still didn't completely *agree* with homeschooling, and so I prayed and prayed, and was still having a problem.
One morning, I was doing my devotion by Blessed Mother Teresa, and reading her words (she's my patron saint, well, she will be a saint). And the Lord began to use her to make me understand what He was asking of me. As I thought more about it, I thought, *If Mother Teresa, a petite, yet dynamic woman could devote and dedicate her life and love toward people and especially children she didn't even give birth to, how much more should *I* be able to devote and dedicate my life and love toward my children in the way the Lord is calling me to do*. WOW! My eyes were surely opened at that moment. Here I was, a petite (in height), yet very headstrong woman, who had the best gifts of all, three beautiful children who I gave birth to....surely I could devote and dedicate my life and love toward them, even though it would be very hard work!
Well, you'd think I'd be completely obedient then, wouldn't you? No, not hard headed me. This was a BIG decision to me, and so I did something I don't often do. I asked the Lord for a sign. I said, *Lord, I know this is what you want me to do. But this is SCARY to me! And I don't completely understand why, or the whats of it yet. Could you please give me a sign if this is truly what you want for our family? Then I will be completely obedient, and I promise I'll commit myself to this for as long as you want us to do it.*
As I went to pick Jake up that very day from preschool, I stood in the vestibule that we waited for our children in, as they were dismissed and brought to us. I'd picked him up ALL YEAR in this vestibule, and never noticed the picture hanging on the wall just where we picked them up. But that day, I did. I glanced up on the wall that day, and there was a very beautiful picture there done in pastel type colors. It was a picture of Mother Teresa, and around her, she had many children, flocking to her, and she was welcoming them, and loving them. 
Well, you could have about knocked me over with a feather! I just couldn't believe it! WOW! Now the fact that there was a picture of Mother Teresa in a Catholic school wasn't a surprise necessarily. But mostly, you'd see our Holy Mother Mary, or Jesus with the lambs, or Jesus with the children. This was a very unique picture of Mother Teresa, one I'd never seen before, or haven't seen since. It wasn't her in Calcutta, it was her in a very light, bright place welcoming children.
As I saw that picture, I said to Jesus at that moment, *YES*. I say yes to you in obedience. Now please help me!
And He has, every step of the way. Oftentimes, we walk blindly in obedience, and later, He reveals to us the whys of His calling us to do this. He's been SO faithful to do that with us. Every year is different, and the journey has not been easy. But it has been the best and most beautiful thing I could have ever said YES to! I am SO BLESSED every day to have my children with me here, and I keep reminding myself EVERY day,
*If Blessed Mother Teresa could dedicate and devote her life and love to children she didn't even give birth to, how much more can I dedicate and devote my life and love to the children that the Lord has given to us as the most beautiful gift of all!*
I am SO blessed that these boards are here. I'm thankful to all of you who are working on them so hard to bring them to us. I look so forward to the community which we are building here, and am so thankful for the encouragement, support, and friendship that I can be a part of, both in receiving, and in giving. Praise Be to God!
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Blessings and Peace,
Tracy Q.
wife of Marty for 20 years, mom of 3 wonderful children (1 homeschool graduate, 1 12th grader, and a 9th grader),
 homeschooling in 15th year in Buffalo, NY
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TradCathMom
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Well, let's see. I have 7 young children, the oldest will be 9 in May. He was never an avid reader and really didn't even start grasping the concept of sounding out words until he was 1/2 way through "first grade". He is your get-down-and-dirty boy who likes putting things together a little less than he likes taking things apart. I was accused of being a bad mother who was not doing my duty properly to teach him because he wasn't reading as well as the cousins could read profusely at the age of 3 or 4. I felt horrid.
My next 2 were girls who were avid readers and took next to nothing to teach the basics to (incidentally no one ever complimented me on the fine job of getting them to read BWAHAHAHA). I used the same books for teaching so by this time I saw that it wasn't me it was that each child has his own gifts and talents, strengths and weaknesses. Incidentally the poorer reader has far better and deeper comprehension than the 2 that read very well.
Well, by this time I had one in K, one in 1st and one in 2nd (not to mention the 3 littles). I was ridiculed by several because the oldest couldn't read or write very well (no one ever counts the things he is very good at). I felt awful pressure so right after my 6th baby was born and I had been so belittled and told what a negligent mother I was (well, in that behind-the-back type of way) I started to push the children in their lessons. I was angry and hurt and I pushed them for ONE day, no, for 1/2 a day.
We were all crying by then and I realized that the "standards" that are forced on children as a "proper" education was not going to work in this household and I dare say I was thinking is very wrong in any homeschooling set up. That is when I began to realize that each child was unique in their abilities to learn. That one may read well while another can figure well, one may be able to draw while another is musical, etc... And I really think that God creates each wee soul in a certain way and we must find that way, even if it isn't the cut out cookie. Some may be good at textbook work and some may not but everyone can learn by natural ways, by exploring and discovering.
So I've been searching since. I have always liked hands-on and this is very easy with Math and Science but I am working my way through to figuring out how to apply these things in other areas. I really think that education is a whole, not a bunch of little bits and pieces here and there. Everything in some way is connected. So rather than english, spelling, reading, writing, all these things can be taught together even by way of one story.
A friend of mine said she has the children read, from there they find 5-20 words they don't know or don't know how to pronounce, they write these in their notebooks and look them up. She also takes sentences from the reading and has them write them and have them pick out parts of speech, etc.... It made so much sense to me.
As I have integrated some of these things into our schooling the children just love it. Little things like not having a handwriting book but copying a bit of their catechism or something has made a huge difference. It makes their handwriting practice mean something, that there is a purpose in all this and I really think that is what education is all about.
Incidentally my oldest has a big fascination with words and the dictionary and always loved vocabulary (we had done some wordly wise), yet he couldn't *read* any of it but he was very good at it LOL Go figure! AND he is really starting to *get* the reading thing, he sees the benefits and sees how much the girls can read and do because they *can* read and it is a good push for him.
And I'm MOST grateful to God, that we have kept our children home and homeschooled them. It is a hard journey but it has been very worthwhile!
I look forward to learning alot around here, it's truly a wonderful group. I really needed something like this.
Julie
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Julie
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Angie Mc
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TradCathMom wrote:
| Incidentally the poorer reader has far better and deeper comprehension than the 2 that read very well. Julie |
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Hi Julie,
This describes my second son also. I'm seeing a connection between readers who are inclined to think/see/read in a macro (big picture) way and to difficulty in the skill of reading while having great comprehension. On the other hand, those who tend to think/see/read in a micro (fine detail) way are inclined to the skill of reading, the detail of moving from one phoneme to the next, at the expense of comprehension. Although children may start "reading" by depending on their natural tendency/strength, with time, patience, experience, and respect it is awesome to watch children grow stronger in their reading weakness, to become mature readers. It really is fascinating, isn't it?
God bless,
__________________
Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Oney
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| Posted: March 15 2005 at 5:01pm | IP Logged
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Hi Elizabeth,
Do you me here as in this forum or here as in homeschooling?
I'm here at this website and forum because I know that you have great wisdom and I want to glean what I can from you.
I'm homeschooling because my heart was breaking for my older son who was in public first grade last year.
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Oney
Happily married and mother of 3
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Mary G
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We started hs'ing when we were loking at leaving the country for at least 2 years -- I started reading up on hs'ing and realized that regardless of going to Austria, I definitely needed to hs my (then) 5th and7th graders. I was losing track of what they were doing in school, the school (altho a parochial school) was fairly secular and upper class (and we're NOT ) and I felt I was "losing them". After 2-1/2 years of hs (using DYOCC and Kolbe), we let them return to a Catholic school that's pretty good, but still has alot of the secular influences that I just can't stand. We will be bringing my 14 yod back home for high school but the older one, currently a soph, needs the social interaction he can get at school and we can't supply as our co-op has only a couple of highschoolers and they're GIRLS with whom Joe is not interested in "hanging out".
My dh and I decided that our littles -- 6, 5 and 2 -- will be homeschooled as long as we can. We've started this year with K and K4 using CM, unit studies, and lots of cuddle reading time and will slowly evolve to the deeper subjects and activities as they grow.
It's such a blessing that we can hs and I love having the littles around me most of the time . I see so much their development that I missed with the older two -- and there is so much less pressure to perform or do what all else are doing. For instance, my 6 yo in the Fall couldn't stand coloring-in or drawing free-hand. He didn't like that he couldn't control and would go outside the lines or not make the drawing what he had in his head. I just would give him something every so often, but if he really stressed, I wouldn't push it. Slowly he has evolved into my best color-er (is that a word?) and loves to draw. I believe that if he had been in "real school" they would have had me down for conferences about his lack of cooperation, fine motor skills, yada yada yada and he would have NEVER drawn or colored!
Also, my 5 yod is a dreamer and loves to make stories -- in "real school" she wouldn't have the chance unless she followed the story starter dictated by the teacher.
I understand that as my littles get older they'll need to adapt to doing stuff they don't like or want to do. But some of the scope-and-sequence you see in curriculua, the key performance indicators used to measure mastery, seem SO artificial and random. Seem like they hurt some kids more then they help.
Anyway, that's why I'm here -- aren't you glad you asked, Elizabeth? 
Blessings and thanks for letting us "vent" through this board.
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MaryG
3 boys (22, 12, 8)2 girls (20, 11)
my website that combines my schooling, hand-knits work, writing and everything else in one spot!
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Elizabeth
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Jenn asked me to share my journey. I think it really began with a miserable childhood. In a very dysfunctional household, I clung to two things: lots of children's books and a Bible. My parents were pretty nominal Catholics, depsite the fact that my mom taught in Cathlic schools. She didn't want to mess with the kids in public school, but she sent us there .My father was a voracious reader and he instilled in me the idea that pretty much anything can be found in a book. He is a very spiritual, philosophical man who sort of makes it up as goes. My mother always said that he sounds like the latest book he's read. There were great ideas, but no foundation upon which to build with them. In this sad household, where we moved all the time, books were a refuge and a real love and respect of literature was born. My father encouraged reading, particularly that children's Bible.
Fast forward to college. I was in nursing school, determined to be a midwife (which had been a lifelong goal). A certain tall, handsome high school sweetheart casually mentioned that my career choice might not work so well if I --hypothetically--had a bunch of kids someday. I changed my major to education the next day. Like Angie, I asked way too many questions from outside the box. In an independent study course my senior year I was completely fascinated by English primary schools where students were grouped in what they called "family-aged groupings." They had children from 4-8 in the same class. I spent some time student teaching in both a Waldorf school and a Montessori school and the eclectic in me was beginning to bloom.
I married my highschool sweetheart.
I was hired by a supposedly great school district (Fairfax County VA) and sent to teach in a special needs school. The principal there told me to teach straight from teacher's manuals, forbade me to share ideas with other teachers and discouraged discussion in the teacher's lunchroom. I don't even think there was a teacher's lounge. I had 22 first graders when I started. At the end of the year, only four of the originals remained. The others were in special ed self-contained classes or had moved due to eviction; but I still had 22 kids--it was a revolving door. Did I mention that I got married the weekend after school began and I was pregnant when we returned from Christmas break? It was a miserable time--I felt trapped in that school and powerless to effect change in the lives of those kids.
MIchael was born the fall of the next year and I began the year teaching in a better environment. I had won a Congressional scholarship that required that I teach for two years, so after Michael was born, my mil took care of him while I worked. I cried when I left every morning and spent all of my breaks and lunch periods in the clinic bathroom pumping. I swore that year that neither I nor my child would go to a public school ever again.
That same year, the Colfaxes published Homeschooling with Excellence. I was at my mil's house one evening and saw the family on the news. That was it for me. I was determined that we were going to homeschool.
Shortly after that, I was diagnosed with cancer. I spent a year doing intensive chemotherapy and radiation. It was that experience that really opened our eyes to the Church, though we really didn't yet understand the fullness of the faith. The early days with the children's Bible reminded me that there was Someone there, and I need HIm but I hadn't yet really made all the connections. Despite the fact that we'd been warned that chemo would render infertility, Christian was conceived seven months after cancer and we were being drawn even more into understanding what it is to put God in charge.
I had begun to edit a a magazine for moms at home called "Welcome Home" and several women on the staff homeschooled. One of them was a woman named Heidi Brennan who became my mentor. When kindergarten time came around, we quietly told people that we were going to homeschool. To this day, my sister in law tells people that we decided to home school because of cancer. And maybe, in the beginning, that sealed it. I knew that I might not have a typical liftetime to spend with my chidren and I wanted to spend all the time that I could meaningfully engaged in their lives.
I lived down the street from a huge homeschooling protestant church that was and is a nationally known force in the movement. They had a lending library and I read every book in it. Then one day, when the very helpful volunteer who manned the library asked what church I went to, I discovered that even though I loved these people, they didn't love Catholics. I went in search of a Catholic homeschooling group.
I found a very small one and learned that there is something called "orthodox Catholicism." Really, it was homeschooling that brought me to the fullness of the faith, not the other way around. The women in that group introduced me traditional Catholicism and I started devouring anything written or spoken by Scott Hahn.That first group was very set in using a traditional Cathoic boxed curriculum. That didn't really sit with my "Colfax/Montessori/Waldorf" tendencies so I ventured further afield, still looking. Around that time, I miscarried. I published a column on miscarriage and a woman named Mary Hasson called me to tell me how much she appreciated the column. We discovered we had boys the same age. My Michael and her Jmmy are best friends to this day.  She and Kimberly Hahn were writing a book and they asked me to read it and consult. It was certainly me who benefitted most from that arrangement. We moved further west, primarily to be closer to Mary and the group out here.
We started a KONOS co-op but I was still restless--not enough of those great books I wanted to re-read and wayyy too much prep and handwork as my family grew. I read a CM Companion around the same time we got the internet. I googled"Charlotte Mason" and found a yahoogroup. On that group, a woman named Michele Quigley gave a glowing review of a Michael O'Brien novel. She was met with silence. I wondered if she was Catholic (duh!). Then, the same brave woman objected to the fact that people were celebrating "Reformation Day" with unabashed glee. I contacted her offlist and within a couple of weeks, we launched Catholic Charlotte Mason. From there, the circle widened. Many of those women from the early days of CCM are now board moderators on the forum. And our discussions are really chronicled in Real Learning. And the booklist there and on my website was crafted over several weeks, making calls to Willa in California and finally, camping with macBeth in one of the most amazing "working vacations" ever. Way more than a booklist happened in Shenandoah that fall: real and enduring friendships were fromed and a philosophy began to really take shape.
Over the years, as my children have grown and life has intervened, I've further refined the way I approach education. To call it a "Catholic Charlotte Mason" is to sell it short. My spirituality and my philosophy of education meet each other in what I call "Real Learning." In everything, we seek the will of God and we understand that as long as we live, He has lessons to teach us. We accept those lessons, no matter how difficult, with a heart and soul of joy, knowing with all confidence that He wants what is best for our souls. Then, we extend that confident knowledge to our children and seek to provide those experiences which will facilitate the learning God wants for them. (Boy, do I need to remind myself of that lately )
We struggled for a little while on CCM to articulate this approach to education and to life. We knew we had more than CM. We knew we were wholly Catholic but we also knew that we wanted to express the boundless joy of the faith. We knew that we ended up tweaking every planned or canned curriculum for each child that we loved and that a planned or canned approach wasn't what we wanted. While we certainly appreciate the careful planning of other people, we clearly hear God calling us to discern, discriminate and design our own curricula, being mindful of the experience and knowledge of others. A very painful experience forced us to come up with a mission statement. It is that mission statement, crafted by Alice, Angie, Lissa, MacBeth and me, that you see on the home page of this board and the CCM list. That represents, to the best of our ability, the philosophy of education that is the fruit of the journey.
Reading this over, I can clearly see how times of greatest pain have borne the ripest fruit. Guess this is a good post for the beginning of Holy Week. Thanks for asking, Jenn.
And hey, I was worried that this format would keep us from posting long, meaty posts. Guess not, huh?
__________________
Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Meredith
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OK,now you've got the west coast bawling!! I was going to try and post something meaningful here the past couple of days, but have been too distracted. Now I'm crying and wishing I knew all you beautiful women in person. What a wonderful and courageous post Eliazbeth, you continue to inspire me as do all the women who contribute on this forum. God Bless you for all you have gone through and for what's to come. I know I am so grateful to have experienced even just a smidgen of your gifts and the graces God has bestowed upon you and your family.
My post, when I can stop the kleenex brigade will be quite different from yours, and God has chosen each of us as participants in this journey for different reasons. I hope that someone will then be able to glean from my experiences much as I have from yours. Thank you again for your candid and loving post.
Humbly yours in +Jesus, Mary and Joseph+
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Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
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Willa
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Elizabeth wrote:
| I knew that I might not have a typical liftetime to spend with my chidren and I wanted to spend all the time that I could meaningfully engaged in their lives. |
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How beautiful, Elizabeth. I haven't had your experience with cancer but I do have the same basic reason for homeschooling.
God has really worked on my heart through mothering and homeschooling. When I first got married, I was so insecure. I was afraid to have children because I feared I would ruin them (still sometimes worry in the dead of the night). My husband wanted to homeschool from the beginning but I couldn't imagine maximizing my influence even more. I already feared my role as a mother. My family background was pretty stable but I had a rough time in my teenage years partly because of my own fault. I was very afraid of failing my kids.
I think the turning point came soon after I was confirmed as a Catholic in 1990. It was a slow process but God really worked in my heart. In 1993 my 4th son was born on the 20th anniversary of Roe v Wade and immediately went into crisis in the NICU. He spent 10 days in intensive care. This wrought a huge change in my heart. Here we were fighting to save this little infant and other infants just like him were being discarded like so much junk. I prayed that my heart would be opened to the preciousness of every new little soul.
At the same time, my 2 oldest boys were struggling in parochial school. My oldest had prayed for a little sibling and been SO thrilled at the news of his conception. Now he had to troop off to school while we visited that little sibling in the hospital. My second child was a natural delight-directed learner, emotionally immature, who loved to pore over thick science books. The kindergarten with its rough and tumble peer group and tidy little "themes" was torture to him.
Plus, our parish instituted perpetual adoration and I got to have a weekly hour in front of the Blessed Sacrament. That was huge in strengthening my faith. Our library had lots of unschooling literature like Growing without Schooling and I recognized that kind of learning as the kind that I really valued about my childhood. I wanted that for my kids. I finally could make the leap to bringing the children home.
We started with Seton but at the same time I read Susan Schaeffer Macaulay's book "For the Children's Sake". So when I burned out with traditional workbooks and seatwork, I knew what might be the problem. A bedrest pregnancy, 2 moves and a C-section and some health problems forced me to slow down and re-evaluate how kids really learn.
Ever since then I've gone back and forth between less and more structure. I am still sort of a fearful type and not really a natural "real learning" type person in that I don't care for hands-on and manipulatives. I learned by reading and writing and the outdoors when I was a child, so that's the parts of "real learning" that I mostly focus on. When things are going best in our homeschool, it's a balance between some "must-do" type things -- chores, certain subjects -- and some "want-to" type things like read-alouds, and projects where I help facilitate what the kids ask to do.
I really believe in "educating by our intimacies in the heart of the home" -- isn't that how Elizabeth puts it in the subtitle of her book? and that's the core of our homeschooling -- working with what we have to form something more than the sum total of the parts. I have to keep re-converting to this ideal -- it's an ongoing process -- but I see education as an integrated process that involves mind, heart, will and spirit. The details vary, and we have "up" and "down" times, but that's the bottom line. I'm so blessed that my husband shares this view of education and lets me have a lot of latitude in what I call "home education".
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AMDG
Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
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4Real Forums : Living Learning
Topic: What brings you here?
