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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star
Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 3:18pm | IP Logged
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My life....
Each year I seem to give less work, it takes longer, and I am crankier in general....burnt out from the get go this year...it is 3:13 and I have children who are yet to do half of the small things I have given them!
I don't know what is needed here..if it is a season, I just need to move on from this...we seem to not be able to even cover the basics well lately and history etc. is basically non existant...how to pick up the pieces and be inspired is past me at this point....I have read the books, the blogs, written the great book lists etc. even given great advice, but basically life is cranky here and I can't seem to get out of the rut....
__________________ Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:01pm | IP Logged
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Kristie, can you just pick the few things that are absolutely critical and do them.. but have fun things to do for the other things after that work is done?
And how much responsibility do your kids have? rather than you. If they were in school they'd likely be learning that it's their responsibility to do the work and get it turned back in.. with help from the teacher and parents when they're younger of course.
I just made assignment sheets for math for my kids.. I put them in windows calender and print out the month view.. and they can see what they need to do and when and can cross it off when they are finished with it. I did more per day but only 4 days a week. It's actually made them MORE willing to work maybe because they "own" more of it? Or maybe just because there's an end in sight, they can see that they only have to do this one or two exercises. That they won't be given more and more if they finish sooner (not that you do that)
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star
Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:08pm | IP Logged
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Very good Jodie.
Actually (blush) I felt tremendously better after my rant- basically alot of it is me being whiny (shame on me!).
Each day is a new day....
__________________ Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:11pm | IP Logged
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Sometimes, it helps to just say it all so that you can move on instead of fussing over it.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Red Cardigan Forum Pro
Joined: June 16 2007 Location: N/A
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:33pm | IP Logged
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I've been there! One frustrating thing is that when I lighten the work load (as I did the day before we went to pick up this sweet fellow, because the girls had to cat-proof their rooms) it seems to take us twice as long to do half the work.
Some of that is me. But I think some of it is that when they have less to do, the motivation to get it done evaporates too, KWIM?
Some things that help in the short term: making "lists" for them to check off as they accomplish each task, setting a timer to discourage dawdling (e.g., "let's see if we can beat the clock," not "this is all the time you have so please waste it all panicking!") , creating some incentives ("hey, if we finish by X time we can make cookies this afternoon!) etc.
One more thing: if one particular subject (math, here) is bogging you down more than the rest, take a look at a few things: do we need a new program? do we need to cut down on the amount of daily work (such as, let's do the odd-numbered problems on page X)? do we put it off too late or try to get it over with first which drags down the rest of the day? and so on.
Right now, because of the aforementioned sweet fellow, my girls are racing each other to be done in the early afternoon. It won't last....
__________________ http://www.redcardigan.blogspot.com
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stellamaris Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 26 2009 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:42pm | IP Logged
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Ummm.. Parkinson's Law: "work expands to fill the available time". So true here!
If you are really more tired, cranky, and unable to accomplish as much, have you considered that it might be health-related? You might want a complete physical to rule out thyroid, adrenal, or hormonal issues.
__________________ In Christ,
Caroline
Wife to dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
Flowing Streams
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star
Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 4:59pm | IP Logged
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HMmm....could be that my doctor phoned me to beg me to please start taking a whole ton of iron every day after I had my test yesterday?
__________________ Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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Erin Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Australia
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 5:06pm | IP Logged
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Kristie
I am so there, have been for a long time and am only now seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.
What helped me to move from my inertia, pity party, spiral; was to finally allow myself to acknowledge that I may be slightly burntout. Then I have myself permission to be gentle on myself, to accept that baby steps was fine. I realised that I hadn't felt excited about anything for some time, I wanted that back.
What is it that you need to do in your lifestyle to feel enthused? I know I need to read to my children, bottom line I read I feel good, I don't read I feel uninspired. So I started my Treasured Moments posts to pick me up, they are helping alot. After all I have to be able to write at least one thing;) So the push was what I needed.
Another thing I realised is I was into the glass half empty mentality, still battling that one (I used to be glass half full person) although the day I recorded just what happens around here made me realise more goes on than I credited. Really recommend doing that, even for half a day.
Bottom line is just do the basics, even one basic a day. Then progress t a picture book and maybe one chapter of a read aloud. everything else does take care of itself. I fought that for a long time, but now I am gentle on myself things are slowly turning around.
Hugs to you.
__________________ Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
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stellamaris Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 26 2009 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Sept 24 2009 at 5:23pm | IP Logged
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Kristie 4 wrote:
HMmm....could be that my doctor phoned me to beg me to please start taking a whole ton of iron every day after I had my test yesterday? |
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Ah-ha!
__________________ In Christ,
Caroline
Wife to dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
Flowing Streams
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Carole N. Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 28 2006 Location: Wales
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 2:20am | IP Logged
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stellamaris wrote:
Kristie 4 wrote:
HMmm....could be that my doctor phoned me to beg me to please start taking a whole ton of iron every day after I had my test yesterday? |
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Ah-ha! |
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I was in the same boat. You will see such a change in your energy level and you will be surprised at how much you can accomplish!
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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folklaur Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: N/A
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 2:22am | IP Logged
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stellamaris wrote:
"work expands to fill the available time" |
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oh wow, it that ever true!!!!
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star
Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 8:26am | IP Logged
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Thank you again.
Yes, Erin- the cup is definitely half empty in my books to often, and read alouds are what we love together (but our problem is moving on after them- we would rather be on the couch allllllll morning!!!)
__________________ Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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asplendidtime Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 14 2005 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 8:39am | IP Logged
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Logistically speaking life here is very full. So this thread was wonderful for me to read. I just get tired, even when I am not expecting... It seems to be a natural rhythm for me. So I don't enjoy the lower/winter times, but I do just sort of recognise that I likely need a more restful, prayerful time.
Spring comes again, it always does. So I keep my hands busy making things (cooking fun recipes, crocheting gifts, made myself a shawl recently to share with new Baby Boy, knitting baby things, reading good stuff/deep stuff) and having lower expectations of myself in general. And trying to let go of the frustrations of not being perfect always.
This really blessed me this week:
Faith and Family Live PPPPodcast: Puking, Fr. Leo Patalinghug, and Perfectionism.
__________________ Rebecca~Mama to
Noah 17,
Katie 16,
Mary 14,
Tim 13,
Jonah 12,
Josh 10,
Zoe 9,
Will 7,
Peter 6,
Laura-Mae 4,
Emily-Joy 2,
Genevieve & Gabriella 1
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Angel Forum All-Star
Joined: April 22 2006
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 5:48pm | IP Logged
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Have you considered putting the fun stuff -- read alouds, art, nature study, etc. -- first? It just doesn't work for us to get our academic stuff done in the morning. For one thing, it takes us all forever to get moving, and for another, I have always found that I burn out far faster when all I seem to do is drag people through work they're not excited about doing. It takes a lot of energy to do that, like pushing a big boulder uphill. Then at that point there's no energy left over for anything creative, and the whole process repeats itself the next day. My kids don't like it either and will start dragging for their feet even more if it's all basics all the time and no "extras". So, for us, "extras" are really "basics". Without them, everything just grinds to a halt.
Another thing I've tried is to make Friday a "fun" day when we have no formal work but just do art, nature, etc. This year, we are just taking Friday off. The kids don't really take Friday off, of course -- a Home Science Tools package came today, which meant that this afternoon they were all beating on rocks with the new rock hammers, pressing flowers, and taking apart an owl pellet while I rocked the baby all afternoon -- but I don't make anybody do math or grammar. I've just realized that I need the break. And the records I've been keeping show that we're getting enough done in 4 days to take that fifth day off.
__________________ Angela
Mom to 9, 7 boys and 2 girls
Three Plus Two
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Willa Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 28 2005 Location: California
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Posted: Sept 25 2009 at 10:07pm | IP Logged
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Angel wrote:
Have you considered putting the fun stuff -- read alouds, art, nature study, etc. -- first?
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I have been doing this! We are using a California charter this year (through K12) and I was fretting because it was so hard to get the kids moving in the morning. I was afraid we would start falling behind which I REALLY didn't want to do. I also didn't want to make academics a relationship-wedge between me and my 8th and 1st graders. So I didn't like stressing and pushing all morning when they weren't into it.
So I moved read-alouds, art hour and nature walk to the am. We start formal academics at about 11:30 or noon. Oddly enough, it's really worked for us, so far. We are finished by 4 pm or 4:30. If we aren't, there's a homework list for the evening for the 8th grader, but so far that's only happened once.
It goes against our normal tradition but it has been working great.
Another thing I've done in the past, Kristie, is attach privileges to X amount of things done. Say, 2 subjects before snack time, 4 before going outside, finish before screen time, or whatever works in your family. I generally try to avoid using these kind of incentives/disincentives but sometimes it works for a short season until kids develop habits not so frustrating to me . Mama needs to be happy
__________________ AMDG
Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
Take Up and Read
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Bethany Forum Pro
Joined: Oct 16 2006 Location: Texas
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Posted: Sept 26 2009 at 10:08am | IP Logged
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You ladies have pointed out something that should have been obvious to me. I'm so burnt out by lunch time, that in the afternoon I just want to veg. I really should do all the read alouds and more fun things in the morning. Right now we start with our more formal work, which is really just my 7 yo, but I'm having to fight off her three younger sisters and it exhaust me. I whould reverse the whole day and have the read alounds first and then have my 7 yo work while the toddler is sleeping!
I'll try this on Monday. I was tired with early pregnancy, allergies, and 7 weeks in to the year this past week, so we took it a little easy. I already feel better about the coming week thinking about how these changes could help.
THANK YOU!
__________________ Bethany
Wife to Mike, Mommy to Amelia (6/02), Sarah (10/03), Martha Grace (10/05), Rebecca Anne (12/07), Laura Catherine (3/10) and Reed Michael 7/4/14.
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Kristie 4 Forum All-Star
Joined: June 20 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 26 2009 at 10:30am | IP Logged
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Hmmm...we do all love Morning Time in the morning- but the older kids are often stressed at what they have to fit in the rest of the day then....(wonder where they got that from???)
__________________ Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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Angie Mc Board Moderator
Joined: Jan 31 2005 Location: Arizona
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Posted: Sept 26 2009 at 10:49am | IP Logged
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Cranky? I get that! Last year around this time our family was dealing wih cranky...and I was the main cranky . Here is a post at my tiny blog about what we did,
Be Blessed! Sometimes for us it is less about me figuring out solutions for our practical problems and more about our individual and collective attitude readjustments. Praying for ya, Kristie!
Love,
__________________ Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
About Me
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Erin Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Australia
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Posted: Sept 26 2009 at 3:53pm | IP Logged
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But does doing the fun things in the morning really work? I'm nervous because :
1. Won't I be too tired to do anything in the afternoon? and
2. My children are in the habit of finishing by lunch. How will they get it that they have to come back?
Anyone else dealt with these issues?
__________________ Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
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ekbell Forum All-Star
Joined: May 22 2009
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Posted: Sept 26 2009 at 4:19pm | IP Logged
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What I do is put my work in the following order
-Morning Devotions (including prayers, song and devotional)
-Daily work (the work I deem essential-no more then an hour's worth for the oldest)
-"Couchtime" (fun read-alouds, picture study ...)
-Non-essential seat work
We take Wednesdays off from regular work in order to make more time for music and crafts and on Fridays we have hands-on religion before Daily work.
If everyone is working well, my eight year old and almost six year old are finished before dinner at 1AM. I've found that if we haven't gotten to couchtime my children will remind me.
I will shift material around a bit depending on what we've not been getting to.
Currently my only peeves are to do with spelling quizzes. Otherwise we've been doing reasonably well.
BTW does anyone have ideas for what to do with ivory soap shavings? My husband brought home a 24bar pack of ivory soap and the children have been doing a lot of soap carving (using clay tools) and now I have a lot of discards and soap bits around.
[my oldest found out that you can paint soap carvings with watercolors, the results are very nice]
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