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amyable
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 10:04am | IP Logged
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I was wondering how people felt about giving away clothes they are not using or don't have a reason to use in the next year or so. This is the one area I'm having a lot of trouble making a decision about.
Seeing that we have four girls, we really do use them eventually, but I do feel guilty - like I'm hoarding. And being 37, what if I don't have another baby soon? And what if it's *gasp* a boy!
I was thinking the other day about a letter we got from the local pregnancy center. They said they don't get enough girls clothes. Ouch! What if my keeping our clothes would make the difference between a mother keeping or aborting or adopting?
My dh is another issue, he would like us to keep the baby clothes. Probably because the last time we gave away our baby things we got pregnant THAT NIGHT.  He would like more children but doesn't want to push it, lol! I know though, if I talked to him about it and told him my reasons he'd be OK with whatever I decided, because he has come to realize that he'd rather let ME run the house than have him waste emotional energy worrying.
OK, now that I've rambled your ears off - have any of you given away clothes even though you may have more children? If someone can convince me that *keeping* them is better in the long run for the world, our family included, I will.  Any thoughts on all this appreciated, it is really a big obstacle towards my goal of living a better Catholic life, living simply, yet doing what is right for my family. Boy, this call to sainthood stuff is hard.
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mellyrose
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 11:25am | IP Logged
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Amy, I was having similar thoughts early last year. I was 38, and I had a ton of baby clothes and gear stored throughout our home. Women around me were expecting children, our local shelter had needs, and I decided to let go of most of it and give it away to people who could use it NOW, instead of "maybe sometime in the future"
Then, I got pregnant in August ;) It's okay, though! Some of it is coming back to me, some I'm getting from others who have decided to let go of their stuff, and some we'll be getting new. I am having a girl this time (after 2 boys), so the clothes I let go are better off!
I DID keep a select few of my favorite pieces of clothes with the intention of having quilts made for my kids. I am also better about passing on the clothes that my oldest has outgrown, instead of saving them as I had been doing.
OH, I also did save some cloth diapers. I gave away about 1/2 (I had 2 in cloth at the same time, though) but saved the other half in case I met someone who had a need. Cloth is hard for people to consider using in our area, and that has worked out for me since we should be set except for covers.
Good Luck with your decision!! I know I struggled last year when I was trying to decide what to do, but I felt a ton better when I let it all go!
Melanie
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Dawnie
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 12:58pm | IP Logged
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I have lots of clothes, too. We have 4 girls, so the littlest will be needing those clothes as she grows. I see this as a "balancing" issue. We don't need to keep all the clothes. For some sizes, we have more than the child could wear. Somehow, I got so many short-sleeved Sunday dresses in size 2T that my dds could not wear them all before summer was over! Now that is ridiculous and I should give some of those dresses away to someone who can use them. In my situation, I think it would be silly for me to give it all away, as my dh and I are still pretty young and probably have quite a few years of fertility left. Giving it all away would mean that we would have to buy it again in 2 or 3 years! From my point of view, that would not be good stewardship of our resources, which are pretty limited at times. Money that would go to replacing clothes that we'd given away could be much better spent at our house...like on school supplies, home improvements, clothes for ME and dh (our kids look great but some of our stuff is pretty ratty--I used some of my Christmas cash to buy a new coat for me...the one I had been wearing was stained and had holes in it...I had been wearing it for over 10 years!), you get the idea.
When I get around to organizing those boxes of clothes, I'm going to keep only what we NEED (which I think would be about 7 everyday outfits and a few Sunday dresses) and give away the excess.
Dawn
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St. Ann
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 2:10pm | IP Logged
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We also have 4 girls and I still have their clothes. I buy quality clothing for the girls and they wear well, so that even the youngest looks nice in her Sunday dress that has been worn by 3 girls before her. I lent the baby clothes to a girlfriend, who will definitly return them if and when I need them again. Through the years I have given away this or that, but I am not ready to give it all away yet, and I am 43yrs old!
For our family it would just be irresponsible to think I could just buy all new things if we would be blessed once again.
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amyable
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 2:45pm | IP Logged
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St. Ann wrote:
For our family it would just be irresponsible to think I could just buy all new things if we would be blessed once again.
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Thank you all for your thoughts - one of the reasons I keep leaning towards giving things away is that I wind up getting clothes again cheaply when we are in need. The yard sales around here yield lots of cheap, like new clothes if I spend some time sesarching, for at least the under 8 crowd. I have more trouble with my oldest (9). So I keep wondering if it is irresponsible to keep it, or irresponsible to give it away!  Decisions, decisions...
thank you again, I have more food for thought now.
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Erin
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I've always tended to keep clothes, but I am now discovering that by the time I had the next girl from my first it was eight years later! and clothes had dated  I would have been better giving away a large part of them. However I did save myself a lot of money not having to start completely over.
Dawnie
your idea in theory sounds right, 7 outfits etc. but then I find with boys they are pretty worn and by the time they get to boy 3 they are VERY sad. So if I had kept more than 7 outfits the subsequent boys still get some decent clothes.
It is a very hard decision. then on the otherhand Amy as you say God does often supply. Can you see I have a problem?
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seven2hold
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I just began giving away this past summer. I have to say it feels really great. Before I thought of what I needed to save in future spending. Now I've decided to trust that God will provide when the need arises.
We had 3 girls in a row, then 3 boys in a row, then a girl. I had already given away all the girls things except the very special handmade-by-Nana dresses. I was still holding on to all my size 3T and under boy clothes although my youngest is in a 4T. I thought about a quote from one of the saints "The second coat in your closet belongs to the man who has none" (or something like that). Anyway, I dragged buckets to my Bible study and the young mothers with just a few little ones were thrilled. It felt great. I wish I'd done it sooner. We may have a little boy again, but there are always sales, grandparents, yard sales AND the kindness and generosity of others! 
That said, I believe it is practical to save for a child who will be coming up soon. Even then there is still an opportunity to give away. With three of each in a row there is an incredible difference in the size of the first daughter or son's wardrobe compared to that of the third daughter or son. They get the hand-me-downs plus the gift clothes here and there. My #3 DD and I have to go through a pile each season and give away half. It really is too much for the drawers and it all turns into piles of dirty laundry! Less is DEFINITELY more in this case!
Blessings!
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JodieLyn
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For me I find limiting the space limits the clothes.. anything else I give away.
Usually by the time I get around to the decluttering I'm pregnant again so it seems real silly to get rid of clothes when I know a baby is on the way.
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Lorri
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 7:15pm | IP Logged
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Our children are not spaced close enough together and of the right gender to make saving clothes worth while. I keep baby clothes that I just LOVE. Anything that is "just" cute is given away. If I had 2 boys or 2 girls that were spaced 2 years or less apart, I would hold on to more clothes to pass on. I like to remember what FlyLady says about giving things away, something to the effect of - it has blessed your family, now let it go on to bless someone elses.
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hylabrook1
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I started out saving clothes to the max. Then things got hairy because of children being born at different times of the year, elastic dryrotting, etc. Also, some of the things looked *much worse* when I took them out of the boxes than they had looked going in I guess that when I was used to looking at them every day I hadn't realized how worn they actually looked.
What I came down to was saving *special* things - coming home from the hospital outfits, gifts from certain people. I also saved newborn things, like those snap-front undershirts and nightgowns. Beyond that, I donated to the pregnancy center and, when the clothes were in bigger sizes, to Salvation Army. I didn't spend a fortune on new things for my younger children, either, but mostly shopped at consignment shops or sewed things.
Peace,
Nancy
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St. Ann
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| Posted: Jan 08 2007 at 1:35am | IP Logged
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I tend to stay away from "fashionable - trendy" children's clothing, we just have practical, functional and pretty - also very classic clothing for the under 6 crowd especially. My oldest dd has the bell bottom jeans, because it is difficult to find anything else and of course she wished them, but I am sure that when dd3 is 10 yrs old the fashion will be totally different and she will be embarrased to wear them. Trendy clothes I would definitely give away. Fashion changes too quickly.
Regarding baby items - I will probably give the whole kit and kaboodle(except for a few special items) to a new young mother who I know well, when the time comes.
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Giving away clothes
