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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Feb 12 2009 at 1:33pm | IP Logged
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Does anyone else experience worrying that you won't possibly be able to deliver a baby with how wiped out, or sore you feel? I am at 37 1/2 weeks with my twin pregnancy(my Mom wrote asking questions for me a couple of moths ago, now I finally found my login, so I can post). I feel okay somedays, but other days, I am so sore and weak that I worry I won't be able to deliver one baby, but especially two!
Anyone else experience this, and how did you do when it came time to actually deliever?
Also, does anyone else's husband experience anxiety over labor and delivery, geting sick or nearly passing out? Does it get better with subsequent deliveries? Any ideas that help? I really need support for this time, and yet i understand how awful it feels to feel like you are going to pass out.
Thank you for any input, and please pray for us both to make it through this with grace!
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hylabrook1
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| Posted: Feb 12 2009 at 2:11pm | IP Logged
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For the five minutes after labor starts, I feel that anxiety. But then as things pick up I become very focused, and almost immediately after the baby is delivered I feel SO much better than I felt for the last 2 months that I want to dance a jig! It's wonderful that you've carried your twins for so long; you're really in the home stretch. Who knows; you could deliver today! My advice is to pray (and I will pray for you), look forward to those beautiful babies; skip thinking about the part in between.
My dh was never shaky about being there and watching the whole process. The problem was kind of the opposite -- dh is a doctor, so he always focused way too much on the medical doings and I felt like he wasn't there for ME! 
Praying for you.
Peace,
Nancy
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Angie Mc
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| Posted: Feb 12 2009 at 2:22pm | IP Logged
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God bless you! I call this the "I've changed my mind!" phenomena . Honestly, with each of my pregnancies I've decided somewhere around 36 weeks that I've changed my mind and can't possibly do this. Then it subsides for a few weeks and I get it again as I'm heading into labor. My midwife says that this is common and lets her know that mom is getting close. Like Nancy said, once labor picks up, the brain and body switch gears into doing the serious work of birthing.
Every dad is different and I think the key is to be honest about what dad needs and what dad can and can't do under these circumstances. My dh is fine with the physical end of things BUT we learned very quickly with my first delivery that I don't respond well to him as my coach  . He is at his best when supporting my body in different positions and sharing words of encouragement.
Pilgrim, who is your mom? I'm praying for you and thanks for posting.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Feb 12 2009 at 4:37pm | IP Logged
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Angie Mc, my mother is Servant2theKing.
Thank you ladies for your responses. I am doing okay today, but feel anxious that I'm going to go into labor on one of my "bad" days. But, on the same token I know the Lord is good and says He will not give you more than you can handle. Oh, it goes back and forth. I know prayer is the best remedy, and have to continually relinquish this all to God.
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Marie
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| Posted: Feb 12 2009 at 5:30pm | IP Logged
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No words of wisdom because I'm in the same boat. I'm a few weeks behind you (34 weeks)and have all the same worries. I think its normal. At the same time, I wonder how I can be pregnant for another 6 weeks with how big and tired I feel. My children don't have the most patient mother right now.
My husband has almost fainted (had to lie down) for both my deliveries and I expect it to happen again. He does not deal well with blood and pain. I encourage him to take care of himself and know that when things get intense, I need to rely on my midwife or nurse. He is doing what he can to just be there!
Prayers for you as you wait for you babies.
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DS 2005, DD 2007, DD 2009 and a new little DS 2011 DS 2014
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Dawnie
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Pilgrim,
I am about 37 1/2 weeks along, too, but with a single baby. I am really struggling with anxiety over labor, and this will be my 5th baby!
Here's what I'm doing to deal with the anxiety: 1st of all, I try to remember that indulging in fearful thoughts will not help me cope with labor any better. I try to imagine myself breathing & relaxing through my contractions (just like I've done in my last 3 births), not freaking out! I know from experience that the pain is worse when I am fearful, tense, and panicky. 2nd of all, I am practicing my breathing and relaxation exercises. I have used the techniques taught in the Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth for my last 3 births and they have been VERY helpful for me. 3rd of all, I'm trying to slow down and rest more so that I won't be worn out when labor begins. Easier said than done, but I'm working on it. 
My sister just had her 1st baby and her dh does not handle witnessing medical-type events well. They talked about it beforehand and she arranged to have our mother there as her coach. Dh was still in the room with her, but our mom did most of the coaching. It seemed to work well for them to accept that being a childbirth coach was something that he just couldn't do. My sister made other arrangements to get the support she needed.
How exciting that you will be holding your twin babies soon!
Dawn
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crusermom
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Pilgrim,
My husband does not do well seeing me in pain. He finds it all difficult. And he is a doctor! I have learned he needs to take breaks and is best just standing behind the bed as a silent support/advocate. He has not gotten any better with subsequent deliveries. I certainly would not call him a coach - but that is ok - I like knowing he is there. Maybe there is a good friend or sister/mother that could be there as a coach?
Mary
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Servant2theKing
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| Posted: Feb 24 2009 at 5:10pm | IP Logged
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Pilgrim's Mom here. I just had to follow-up on my dear daughter's post, especially for the sake of any of you whose births are still imminent. In spite of all the anxiety and pre-birth jitters, my daughter and son-in-law did beautifully! When we arrived, after a ten hour drive, dd was standing through a contraction, while her dh hugged her through it. When they had to eventually move to an OR, for the twins' sake, sil was right there with her. We have delightful pictures of him in full scrubs, holding their precious babies...he and dd were full of smiles as they held the twins for the first time.
While they've both been through a great deal since the birth, Feb. 14th, including having one twin spend several days in NICU in a different city, carting the other twin to separate doctor appts. in the opposite direction, nursing and pumping milk for both babies, mother and father are doing much, much better than anyone would have imagined. When we left them yesterday for the long drive home, sil was actually baking bread, with beautiful, peaceful music playing in the background, the twins were blissfully sleeping, while being passed around for last minute hugs (except when we gave them each one last diaper change for the road).
When we spoke this morning my daughter and I marveled at how well they are all doing, in spite of everything that has transpired since the babies were born. The Grace of God and the prayers of many dear souls have been their lifeline! For those of you awaiting the births of little ones soon, may the Lord cover you and your husbands with Grace and may the prayers of all the saints strengthen, sustain and bless you, giving you profound peace as you bring forth new life! As you await the blessed event try to remember, you will only live these precious moments once....try to cherish them and hold them close in your hearts! With prayers for happy and holy birth experiences for all expectant mothers!
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MarilynW
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Congratulations Mama and Grandma! I am so pleased to hear that all went well - I have been praying for all of you. As a fellow twin mama - you have been on my mind a lot. Would love some details - boys/girls/one of each? Enjoy them - although the newborn days are tough (I don't recall much about the first couple of months of my preemie twins at home!) - twins are so precious!
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Mackfam
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I'm so, so happy for all of you, Pilgrim and Servant! Thanks be to God!
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hylabrook1
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Servant - thank you for the update.It's great to hear everyone is doing so well. Congratulations to both the parents and grandparents of the precious twins.
Peace,
Nancy
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Booksnbabes
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Congratulations to the new mom and dad, and praising God for the grace He bestowed on the family during the first difficult week and a half!
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Pilgrim
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| Posted: March 03 2009 at 11:23am | IP Logged
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Hello everyone. I'm actually getting a moment to write here.
Thank you everyone for all your prayers! The delivery went very well. I was still having anxiety during labor, I was in labor for hours and it was not progressing very fast. Then in the evening the doctor strongly suggested I get an epidural and start a pitocin drip, both of which I have always been against in the past. But, I have really taken to heart the advice given by one of you ladies, that when it comes to having twins one must learn to be flexible, and realize that many of your expectations will have to be relaxed. After discussing it and praying with my husband, we decided that it would be best for me to follow the doctors advice. It was definitely the best choice, because I got a second wind and was able to regather my strength for the pushing stage.
Everyones prayers were felt there that day. My husband did so much better than anticipated. He was there through the whole delivery, and was praying for me, and was actually able to look at the baies just after they emerged. He had the biggest smile on his face, and kept going back and forth between me and the babies. Just having my husband there by my side meant so much to me, even if he wasn't "coaching" me, to have his hand on my arm and know he was there was so wonderful.
I wanted you other ladies who are experiencing anxiety,to know how well everything went.
Oh, and another answer to prayer was that "Baby B" had been breech for months, and a couple of days before they were born, he turned vertex! We had wondered if he did because there was a huge lump like a head that flipped around my belly on day. Then the morning I went into labor, we found out during the ultrasound, that he had flipped. We were all soooo happy. Especially our 8 yo dd who had been praying for months that he would turn!
So we had a normal vaginal birth, everything went well. We had a girl and a boy. Gianna Rose and Jeremiah Joseph. The girl had her hand up in a fist by her cheek when she came out, and he had his arm up over his head, but I didn't tear at all, and they were both fine.
Gianna had swallowed a lot of amniotic fluid and phlegm, and had troulble with vommiting it and choking in the first 2 days, and she was vomitting the colostrum with it, so she ended up dehydrated and in the NICU. But we caught it in time, and evrything is going well now. She nurses even better than he does, which I was concerned about because of the bottles she was receiving in the Hosp.
God is gracious, and we are all doing well now, in spite of a great lack of sleep!
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St. Ann
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Pilgrim, Congratulations! Welcome little Gianna Rose and Jeremiah Joseph! What beautiful names you have chosen. It is wonderful that the delivery was such a wonderful experience - thanks for sharing.
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aussieannie
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What great news Pilgrim!  Good to hear that the birth went so well for you and as Stephanie said, very beautiful names!
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Angie Mc
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Congratulations and thank you to all! Wow, Pilgrim, great job to you and your dh! Love those babies up real good now  . Prayers continue.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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4Real Forums : Our Lady of Good Remedy and Care
Topic: Anxiety about delivery?
