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helene
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 10:44am | IP Logged Quote helene

My unpleasant sleeping "partner" is my ten month old son. He spends the first two hours of the night in his own little bed right next to mine. Then he wakes and I take him into my bed to nurse him. He will usually go back to sleep but is very wakeful the rest of the night. He will wake crying and whining and kicking his little legs. It's not an "I am in pain and teething" kind of cry, but an irritated, grouchy cry. Often even nursing won't settle him. I'll have to get up and pace the floor with him. I feel like he wishes he were able to sleep deeper and longer but can't somehow. He will wake 4 or 5 times that second half of the night. Shouldn't he be sleeping for longer stretches at this age? He does eat solid foods....oatmeal and rice cereal and tiny bits of whatever we are eating at meals. He has one tooth on the bottom which he seems to have cut without any fussing during daylight hours. Should I introduce a sippy cup of whole milk during the day to see if he might feel fuller and sleepier at night? He naps regularly for an hour or two every day around noon. And when daylight arrives he is always happy as a clam, no fussiness or unhappiness. Very contented and cheerful all day. This is not a new pattern. He has been this way for maybe the last 5 or 6 months. Any ideas?

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juststartn
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 11:27am | IP Logged Quote juststartn

Have you tried putting him back down in his own bed? It might be that he's just not happy in the bed with you and DH?

Just a thought.

Rachel

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kingvozzo
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 11:53am | IP Logged Quote kingvozzo

Ditto what Rachel said. I find that my little one gets restless in bed with us anymore. Despite the fact that he's still wakeful during the night, he really would rather be in his own bed.

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10 Bright Stars
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 12:31pm | IP Logged Quote 10 Bright Stars

I have been trying to work on this situation too. My 15 month old still co-sleeps with us, but we are both annoyed by each other. She won't sleep in the little bed next to ours, and I don't know about her sleeping in another room as we took down the cribs just recently! She doesn't want any covers though, and is very restless all night. I would second that if it is an issue, you might want to use a separate bed altogether for him and give him a snack before bed.    

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Maryan
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 1:55pm | IP Logged Quote Maryan

Helene I'm right there with you!!! Our guy has the same routine. Awful at night, cheerful at day. Unfortunately, his mom is not his peer. After weeks and weeks of this wake up every hour and nurse, but not be happy thing -- I reached my breaking point.

I baled from our bedroom and hit the couch. (We're failures in the sleep department with our kids -- my dh had already left our room to sleep with one of our other kids at 1 am).

Anyway, I put little man in the pack and play in our room... by himself. He fussed for fifteen minutes and then slept from 3:30 until 8 am this morning. (I wish I did as well on the couch!!) I suspect this little man just wanted for some peace and quiet with nobody touching him????

Different strokes for different babies? My second child was like this too, and we went this route about the same time and he is by far our best sleeper now.

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missionfamily
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 2:27pm | IP Logged Quote missionfamily

I too have had little ones that did not sleep well in our bed. It was very strange to me since my first three had co-slept with us peacefully until well into their second year so it took me a couple of months to figure out that's why this little guy was so unhappy at night. WHen I switched to nursing him and then putting him back in the pack n play in our room, he began sleeping another 5-6 hour stretch after his initial one and was only waking once to nurse.

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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 3:23pm | IP Logged Quote anniemm

With all 3 of my girls so far, they have slept in the bed with me from the very beginning. Right at about 9-10 months, each of them started doing exactly what you described! We just irritated each other and neither of us got any sleep. Well, I guess my poor husband didn't either! Anyway, at that point I usually would nurse them before bed and put them in their own beds. It usually only took one or two nights of minimal (5-10 minutes) crying for them to just figure out what was going on. After that, they have all slept really well on their own, even still. While they were still nursing, I would often go get them in the night when they cried and bring them back to bed with me. My first two did great and just slept there with me until morning, but my latest one couldn't do that so I just took her back to her own bed and she'd go back to sleep.
I miss sleeping with my babies, and my girls are 4, 3, and 18 months now and are still known to show up sometimes. They are perfectly welcome, but for the most part, they all sleep very well in their own beds.
Maybe your little guy and you need some space to get good sleep! :-)

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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 4:22pm | IP Logged Quote doris

My 11-month-old is just the same. With him, I'm sure it's tooth related. He's got four now, but each one has been verrrrry painful for all of us! My reckoning is that he is distracted in the day, and it's just worse at night with nothing else going on.

There's no way, incidentally, that he would sleep in his cot. Ah, and I hear him now...

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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 5:39pm | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Could he be hot? Thirsty for water instead of breast milk?
My dd (age 2) was very fussy last night. We changed her pjs from fleece to cotton and gave her some water. She finally calmed herself and slept great cuddled next to Daddy. We are in Chicago so I know all about cold nights. I guess finally getting into the 20s it was a warm spell and the fleece pjs were too uncomfortable!   

Mb

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helene
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 9:07pm | IP Logged Quote helene

Well, I like what I'm hearing here! While I love him to pieces I think maybe it IS time to get some space from each other at 2 am. We will both be better for it! The trick is to stay awake long enough after nursing to put him back in his own bed. I am well motivated to try for a better night's sleep so that should help. I bought a little cup today to introduce water or whole milk in the afternoons or just before bedtime. Maybe he is too hot, too. He does wear those heavy blanket pajamas and is always kicking off the covers. Cotton long-johns might work better. Thank you for all these ideas.....and it's good to know I'm not alone!

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teachingmyown
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 9:23pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmyown

a book I found helpful is the No-Cry Sleep Solution for Babies, written by a co-sleeping mom of four and physician. He probably does need more space, even if it just trying to scoot away and let dh pat him back to sleep.

I think we co-sleeping moms are so quick to try to nurse a half-awake baby back to sleep, which works with a young baby. With the older babies and toddlers, we may actually be keeping everyone somewhat awake and thus cranky. I am still working through it with ds13months. I had almost gotten him trained to sleep in the co-sleeper, and then we got sidetracked.

These days he falls asleep on dh's chest and I try not to get too close until he really wakes up.

Good luck!

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trish
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Posted: Jan 20 2009 at 10:21pm | IP Logged Quote trish

Lots of good advice. My little guys is 10 months too and having a tough time at night. Thanks!    He might need more room. It does get pretty crowded.

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