Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: New Homeschooler of three (13, 6 and 4) Post ReplyPost New Topic
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jenncatan
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Posted: Sept 23 2009 at 3:34pm | IP Logged Quote jenncatan

I need guidance!

I decided last year to start homeschooling our ds last year, I want all of our children to have a love for learning and it was apparent over the years that school had become drudgery for our oldest. I researched homeschooling for months (i read everything in all our local libraries) and decided that homeschooling was the way to go. We wanted a catholic curriculum that would be easy for us to implement so we registered with Seton.

I've been incorporating Montessori with our littles but i'm not sure how to proceed with our oldest.

He's bored. Believe me there is plenty to do. Plenty of questions to answer, things to read but in general he's bored. It's not exciting him at all. It's very similar to "regular" school just at home.

I like the things i've been reading on this forum but it's so much information that i don't know where to begin.

He is not a book lover. I do think this may have to do more with the types of books he's required to read. In general he's more apt to pick up his guitar to play than read a book.

I appreciate any suggestions you may have.

gratefully,
Jenn
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ekbell
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Posted: Sept 23 2009 at 5:59pm | IP Logged Quote ekbell

Seton is very schoolish compared to a number of other programs.

I haven't ever had my children in school but I've heard that children burned out from school can need a substantial time to deschool - defined as time without anything resembling formal schooling. I've seen recommended that there should be one month of deschooling for every month of schooling.

The advantage to the kid is the time to recover from being burned out. To recover his own interests and even time to be bored because he isn't doing anything (with encouragement to be creative) rather then being bored by doing something he's not interested in with the full knowledge that he'll have to do more of the same sort of thing tomorrow.

The advantage to you is that it gives you a relatively guilt free period of time just to keep an eye on your son and to get to know him better. To learn what sort of things he likes when left to his own devices. To figure out how he's most likely to learn (when learning something for himself, does he like to work by trial and error or does he like to follow a manual; does he choose to do things with his hands, does he flit from thing to thing or does he spend hours in one place?)


If you can't face doing nothing for that long then I would recommend paring down your requirements to a bit of reading, a bit of writing, a bit of math and a bit of family religion. I have done this at difficult points in our family life.

I've found that insisting on a set amount of time of real work is better then asking for a set amount of work. For my childern to know for an absolute fact that if they buckle down, they will be finished in an hour, works better then being assigned what I think is less then an hour's worth of work.

[I've assigned as daily work, 20mins of writing (either free or using certain workbooks) and 20mins of math - my older children read of their own accord so I don't assign reading; if I had to it would be 'choose a book from this pile to read for 20 mins or longer as you please'].


Either way I would recommend looking through lists of fiction and nonfiction books, CDs and videos recommended for children of your son's age and see what you can take from the library and then taking a few of them out at a time so as to see which ones he's actually interested in (this can be the source of the pile of books for reading). I do this all the time, sometimes the children read them and sometimes they don't. It can really help with finding out interest.

I would also recommend looking at your own interests and seeing what you can pursue for yourself. It took me a long time to realize that if I regretted not learning something, it was a lot better for me to actually start working at learning it then for me to try to it on my children. So I now have a fine collection of books about art and CDs and my own art supplies. It's fun and it shows my children it's never too late to learn. Sometimes they even decide to join me   
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JodieLyn
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Posted: Sept 23 2009 at 6:24pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

To start with, don't get overwhelmed.

Seriously, there's extra things you could do with just about any subject. Pick one subject to tweak or add to, you pick it or your son. And then go from there.

I don't know how locked in you are to the program that you got from Seton. But if you can, you could consider things like ekbell mentioned where you let him figure out that there are things out there worth learning about without being told exactly what to read, write or know about.

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lapazfarm
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Posted: Sept 23 2009 at 11:59pm | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Your situation seems a lot like mine. I am currently homeschooling my 14 yo son, my 8yo dd, and my almost 4yo grandson. And I think I am going on my 14th year of homeschooling.

Seton is a great program, but you are right in that it is essentially the same as "regular school" only it is thoroughly Catholic.Which is a good thing, of course.
This works very well for some folks.

It would drive me and my children stark raving mad.We are all different, right?
There are so many methods and philosophies out there.Play around with them a bit. You may end up trying them all before you are done (most of us have done the rounds a time or two!LOL!)You will eventually figure out what works for you.

But I think the number one thing you can do to inspire your son is for you yourself to be a real-live, in-your-face example of a passionate, creative, lifelong learner.
Let your son see YOU pursuing knowledge,digging deeply,getting messy, making mistakes, learning for the pure joy of it.He will see from your example that learning isn't something we "have" to do, it is something we "get" to do! How lucky we are! How blessed! What riches are out there for the taking! He will see your enthusiasm and it will rub off.

Do you have a hobby? Dive into it, with him at your side diving into his own interests (the guitar!)Share a good book with him, a good movie, a nifty math trick. Let him see your enthusiasm spilling over. Take a walk in the woods or fields with no agenda but to just soak it all in. Discuss everything, not in a teacher-ish way, but just in a sharing-my-interests way. Eventually...he will start sharing back.
That's when you know you've got him.




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SuzanneG
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Posted: Sept 28 2009 at 2:12am | IP Logged Quote SuzanneG

Welcome to the Forum, Jenn!

This post is a bit disjointed. I've started it several times.    Also, keep in mind Jodie's advice above, not to get overwhelmed....this post ended up being longer than I intended.

It sort of sounds like the #1 priority may be to pump him up a bit....get him excited about something. Instead of focusing on "school", right now....can you put all your energies toward getting him connected and excited about a few things?

Brainstorm ideas with him of things he loves, likes to do, and is interested in. For the next 6 months or so, focus on those things.   

Think of it as emergency-mode. What's the priority? Lighting the Fire? Or getting him to do geometry?

::Focus on Family-Time right now. Do things as a family.

::Do things with him individually late at night when the others are sleeping....watch movies, cook, talk, work on a house project, etc.

::Can you give him some responsibility around the house? Things that can be "his own". house projects, maintenance, organizing a space, etc. All those things are "learning"....using math, problem-solving, etc.

::What about brainstorming ideas that he can go farther with his guitar and music? A mentor? Give beginning lessons? Sing? A study of music history? Going to concerts? Helping out with guitar concerts? Performing for you? Learning songs to sing with the littles?

Have you read any "unschooly" books? Even if you're not completely an "unschooler", it sounds like incorporating aspects of unschooling for your son would be helpful??

Here are some books that Leonie compiled. And, check out her blog, too...she homeschools/unschools her many sons!

--Homeschooling With Gentleness
--Teach Your Own by John Holt
--Christian Unschooling
--The Unschooling Handbook
--Better Than School
--Let The Children Play
--Parenting A Free Child
--Homeschooling Our Children, Unschooling Ourselves

There are some resources here too: Unschooling Catholics Blog


Have you read Elizabeth Foss' book: Real Learning? There are lots of concepts in there, clearly and simply explained with good examples, that may help you take one-thing-at-a-time.

A few ideas for to "start":

::Get outside, enjoying nature, and have some fun. Handbook of Nature Study has lots of ideas for nature/art/enjoying time outside.

::Field Trips---his choice

::Watch lots of movies together with him, you, dh. There is a list of historical movies in chronological order and a thread from the archives here: American History through DVD. And, even other non-history movies. There is a great book called The Film Club that is a really good book not only about movies, but gave insight into the mind and journey of a teenage boy.

::Find Book lists of Living Books, start checking them out at the library. Don't force him to read anything he doesn't like. Keep trying to find something he enjoys. (keep in mind this is emergency-mode).

::Living Books and Movies "teach" on their own....Like Theresa said, don't be teacher-ish about things, just enjoy them with him.

::Once you've identified things/places/people/time periods that he's interested, come back here and ask us for ideas, books, movies, etc.....or search the archives.

Look through the Rabbit Trails forum for ideas of things he may want to explore.

Even in Emergency-Mode there may be some things that are non-negotiables.....because of state requirements, dh's wishes, your comfort level, etc. If doing this/these non-negitiables in the traditional way is totally painful, try to find ways to work around his abilities and interests. Be creative about how you are getting X done. The ladies here are great at coming up with creative ideas for learning...ask away!

Linking this in case there is something there that may be interesting:
Young Men's Unit

And, most of all, don't hesitate to come back and ask specific questions once the ball is rolling a bit!! We love to search, link and compile around here!

You'll do great, Jenn! It's so exciting to think of this journey you're embarking on with your son! He's so blessed!



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jenncatan
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Posted: Sept 28 2009 at 4:26pm | IP Logged Quote jenncatan

Thank you all so very much. I'm happily searching through all of the links while my oldest is baking cookies with his sister and brother.

I'm awaiting the book by Elizabeth Foss. I'm hoping it will help me understand the real learning way of life a bit better.

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