Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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folklaur
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 5:19pm | IP Logged Quote folklaur

Okay, I have to know - when you are all talking about being a sanguine or a melancholy personality...what in the world are you talking about? Am I the only one who has no idea what my temperament is? Should this concern me?

I am assuming it has something to do with the book "The Temperament God gave you" - yes? Is this a self-help or parenting book? I am not a big fan of those....so will I be   hopelessly confused as to the temperament of myself/children?     

Are these some kind of "acceptable labels" for me to use on myself/my children? I know we have often talked about labels being self-fulfilling...wouldn't this work the same way?

I really am confused....
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 6:01pm | IP Logged Quote StephanieA

I am not a big fan of temperament books either, but I broke down and bought this one (Temperament God Gave You). It REALLY helped me relate better to my husband and one of my sons. I realized that what I thought swerved into spaciness, was really a temperament I also learned that my personality comes with its drawbacks too The good thing about this book is that it also helps you discern a spiritual approach because of your temperament/personality.

I haven't read the book through cover to cover, but I have read certain sections over several times. It is one of those books that you check back with when you just don't get WHY this kid (or hubby) is doing this certain thing. It gave me a better perspective on my dh and child's great attributes.

As an aside, I can't ever keep the darn "labels" straight. To me, it makes no difference. The important part is how you relate to others and to yourself.

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Maryan
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 6:25pm | IP Logged Quote Maryan

It's an old Greek idea (see Wiki. The names are based on bodily functions.

Think: emoticons...
The two extroverts:
Sanguine The life of the party, chatter, no discipine, big eater (flash temper) - ie. St. Peter
Choleric Big temper, driven, goal oriented, ie. St. Paul

The two introverts
Melancholic Deep thinker, analytical, artsy
Phlegmatic Laid back, non-commital, very pleasant, dry humor, hospitable

I'm WAY oversimplifying these. There are many books out on this... and many books that address looking at your strengths and weaknesses from a spiritual point of view! Some books even use various saints for examples, etc.

Like you said, the downfall of these books: You don't want to pigeon hole yourself into "I'm a phlegmatic, so I just don't do commitment,"... etc.


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JennGM
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 7:23pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

Maryan wrote:
It's an old Greek idea (see Wiki. The names are based on bodily functions.


You got me LOL here, Maryan. I think you mean bodily fluids, not functions.

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Posted: March 11 2008 at 7:27pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

JennGM wrote:
Maryan wrote:
It's an old Greek idea (see Wiki. The names are based on bodily functions.


You got me LOL here, Maryan. I think you mean bodily fluids, not functions.


Okay, I didn't mean to sound like I'm correcting you. You're right of course, I just took it a different way and it just tickeled me....

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So Blessed
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 7:31pm | IP Logged Quote So Blessed

I love the book and as others have said, especially the spiritual component of it. It has been very helpful in understanding the general makeup of my kids as well as how to motivate them.

Maryan, I just loved your emoticoms. They're perfect!
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JennGM
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 7:36pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

Although based on Hippocrates, Catholics have been using this for years. I have found it in "Theology of Christian Perfection" by Jordan Aumann et all, 9th grade Religion book from DSP "Your Right to Be Informed" and many other places.

A classic pamphlet can be found online The Four Temperaments by Fr. Conrad Hock.

The Bennetts' book is good, but some places contradicted Fr. Hock in some temperament combinations. He seemed to think that heredity plays a big role, so that if you don't have phlegmatics in the family genes, you aren't suddenly going to have one with that temperament. I would tend to agree.

There was an old thread that had a great discussion in this.

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Posted: March 11 2008 at 7:36pm | IP Logged Quote happymama

I was totally skeptical about this book... (TTGGY) and then I read it and it really changed my life. I like to give it as a wedding gift now!
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Posted: March 11 2008 at 8:29pm | IP Logged Quote SusanJ

Only a sec to post but just wanted to chime in that dh and I loved this book as well. Good insight into ourselves, each other, the kids, friends, extended family. Great all around.

Susan

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Posted: March 11 2008 at 10:08pm | IP Logged Quote insegnante

You can take a temperament test for free at Catholicmatch.com -- you can register specifically as a married person who isn't allowed to use the dating section of the site. I took it twice, about a year apart, and my score only differed by 2% -- I think it was 88% melancholic and 12% phlegmatic the first time, and 86/14 the second time. My husband took it once and got the two types I guessed for him, but with the percentages reversed from those I'd guessed -- he tested as 70% sanguine and 30% phlegmatic and I'd guessed 30/70 s/p.

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Posted: March 11 2008 at 10:20pm | IP Logged Quote Mackfam

I too loved the book "The Temperament God Gave You." I found it extremely helpful in understanding myself, my husband, and my children. Ranks right up there with The Five Love Languages/The Five Love Languages of Children.

Eye opening!   



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Posted: March 12 2008 at 6:37am | IP Logged Quote SusanJ

That Catholic Match test is really good and you don't have to get through anything inappropriate to join. I have a theory that homeschooling mothers, especially those that blog are overwhelmingly melancholic    Any thoughts?

Susan

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 7:30am | IP Logged Quote Ruth

Here is another test you can take.

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:02am | IP Logged Quote Maryan

JennGM wrote:
You got me LOL here, Maryan. I think you mean bodily fluids, not functions.


No.. you were right, I did *mean* to say "fluids"

And Jenn, I couldn't find a link to the book you recommended... but that's my favorite. Only because I disagree with the Bennett's that you can't be a Sanguine Melancholic... which I think I am (and so does every other test that I've ever taken)!

But not to detract from how wonderful I find the rest of their book.   


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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:04am | IP Logged Quote CrunchyMom

SusanJ wrote:
That Catholic Match test is really good and you don't have to get through anything inappropriate to join. I have a theory that homeschooling mothers, especially those that blog are overwhelmingly melancholic    Any thoughts?

Susan


It would be interesting to get a poll going.

I am sanguine, and I don't blog, lol. I think that blogging is a lot like journaling which also tends to be done by the melancholic--very introspective. Plus, I can't even get pictures of my kids to their grandparents before they are 6 months late, I don't see myself really being motivated to have the pictures of all that we are doing organized and presented to the world.

I like writing, but I think I would get bored with a blog after a few months. Plus, I don't trust my motivation. I think I'd just want to be "popular" and would focus too much on how many hits/comments/etc... I got. I already procrastinate, focus too much on what others think about me. I think a blog might be a near occasion of sin for me, at least at this point in my life.

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:04am | IP Logged Quote stefoodie

SusanJ wrote:
I have a theory that homeschooling mothers, especially those that blog are overwhelmingly melancholic


Not me. Sanguine-choleric here. With a touch of melancholic. But zero phlegmatic. And my dh is phlegmatic-melancholic. We make a good match

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:16am | IP Logged Quote CrunchyMom

stefoodie wrote:
SusanJ wrote:
I have a theory that homeschooling mothers, especially those that blog are overwhelmingly melancholic


Not me. Sanguine-choleric here. With a touch of melancholic. But zero phlegmatic. And my dh is phlegmatic-melancholic. We make a good match


Do you blog?

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:22am | IP Logged Quote JennGM

Maryan wrote:
JennGM wrote:
You got me LOL here, Maryan. I think you mean bodily fluids, not functions.


No.. you were right, I did *mean* to say "fluids"

And Jenn, I couldn't find a link to the book you recommended... but that's my favorite. Only because I disagree with the Bennett's that you can't be a Sanguine Melancholic... which I think I am (and so does every other test that I've ever taken)!

But not to detract from how wonderful I find the rest of their book.   


Do you mean Character Building by David Isaacs?

There was another thread that Laraine Bennett came and discussed the book.

And I'm choleric-melancholic, almost even numbers, but my impatience rules, so choleric would be first.

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:27am | IP Logged Quote CrunchyMom

That makes sense to me, Jenn. The melancholic and choleric seem to be the most organized and committed. I imagine a choleric drive could be useful in both homeschooling and in keeping a blog. Plus, that melancholic tendency to be introspective.

I'm sanguine-choleric and am consistently inconsistent. They fight a lot, lol, and I'll be early and organized for everything for a while and then go through another stretch where I am late and flakey. That's why I think I could do a blog well for a few months, and then it would fizzle once it wasn't new and exciting.

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Posted: March 12 2008 at 8:28am | IP Logged Quote stefoodie

CrunchyMom wrote:
stefoodie wrote:
SusanJ wrote:
I have a theory that homeschooling mothers, especially those that blog are overwhelmingly melancholic


Not me. Sanguine-choleric here. With a touch of melancholic. But zero phlegmatic. And my dh is phlegmatic-melancholic. We make a good match


Do you blog?


Yes -- it's linked through my "www" button :)

(I suppose I should change my settings -- used to have 3 blogs that wouldn't fit on my signature, now that I have only one it should! Changing right now...)

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