Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Helen
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Posted: March 25 2007 at 7:26am | IP Logged Quote Helen

I have one other thought about burnout and CM. (Just tell me when to stop. Does anyone have a gong or a large hook??)

It seems to me that CM's method is largely based on communicating "ideas" to children through books. In high needs families, who tend to feel more tired by the end of the school year, I'm wondering if part of "high needs" includes a good dose of ideas.

Let me try to explain. If I use my situation as an example, most of my children are adopted. Not every day we explicitely talk about adoption, but it is *there*. The whole process of adoption is full of ideas. Ideas for children to ponder. I'm sure many days, without saying it, a child of mine is wondering
Where did I come from? Why was I adopted? What would have happened if I wasn't adopted?

In other words asking the deep question of life: What is the meaning of life? (Couldn't a new baby in the family cause the same line of questioning? a move?)

If your family is in some sort of life changing situation, small or large, it could be that the children have ideas to ponder. The atmosphere might be rich in oxygen already. (I posted in the other thread that CM says if children are crying over their lessons than the air is too rich in oxygen. I took that to mean "too many ideas.")

It may be too much to try to pull them through a rigorous session of schooling.

Just a thought on keeping a regulatory hand on the school year.

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Posted: March 25 2007 at 8:42am | IP Logged Quote Cay Gibson

Helen wrote:
I have one other thought about burnout and CM. (Just tell me when to stop. Does anyone have a gong or a large hook??)



The Gong Show!
I'd forgotten about that oldie.

Thanks for the laugh, Helen. In the mist of such sorrowful news, the laugh was refreshing.

Keep going though. Please. I'm enjoying this thread and your insights so much.

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Posted: March 25 2007 at 9:34am | IP Logged Quote Tina P.

Helen wrote:
I do like Sound Beginnings - does everyone need it? Well, it is the one program that I've used successfully to teach some of my children to read. I like the way it teaches the spelling rules. It gives the beginning reader chunks of information with which to decipher books. It allows the developing writer to practice penmanship in small segments but meaningful segments.

I think I just can't use it exclusively and for extended periods of time with 4 children at one time. I'm a slow learner. I keep pushing without learning *my* lesson.


I have four solid readers. Two learned together, the traditional way. We used *some* of WWTR and BOB books, coupled with Explode the Code workbooks. One took his time and didn't read confidently until after he was 8. The fourth learned completely on his own. He thought the little readers I started him on were too babyish. I was concerned about the lack of phonics. But he spells well, too! I don't understand it, I'm just thankful for it. I guess what I'm trying to tell you, Helen, is that every child learns differently. You might find that an *easier* program for you to implement is actually more effective for some of your kids.

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Posted: March 26 2007 at 8:11pm | IP Logged Quote Nina Murphy

Helen,

Could you please describe what "Drill and Kill" looks like?

I enjoyed your list---thank you.

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Posted: March 26 2007 at 8:45pm | IP Logged Quote Helen

Nina Murphy wrote:
Helen,Could you please describe what "Drill and Kill" looks like?


I hope I gave enough credit to Elizabeth for those words! They come from the math chapter of her book.

In the other seasonal thread, Willa provided a link to her blog post. Although, I didn't follow Willa's link on her blog, she mentions Clarkson's idea of distinguishing Discovery subjects from Drill subjects.

For me, drill and kill is providing drill to the children without enough:
discovery, real life, or "ideas".

Discovery, real life and ideas provide that "relational" link (education is the science of relations) to the subject that needs to be drilled. It "greases the skid" to help move the difficult subjects along so that the "donkey feet" don't go down.
(That's what we call obstinancy at school work. )

I think to drill and kill is very exhausting for both the student and the teacher. I'm reminded of music practice. If it's mostly theory and finger exercises but without the "refreshing" quality of actually playing a tune, music practice is sheer penance. With young math and reading students, this is often what is offered because they cannot "play" advanced songs.

I've been thinking that to combat this tendency to "drill and kill" it is a good idea to keep CM's three ideas together:
atmosphere, discipline, life - especially atmosphere.

Burnout (or excessive fatigue) could result from an imbalance in these three elements.(Wouldn't too much drill fall into the category of too much discipline?)

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Posted: March 26 2007 at 9:31pm | IP Logged Quote onemoretracy

Helen wrote:

I think to drill and kill is very exhausting for both the student and the teacher. I'm reminded of music practice. If it's mostly theory and finger exercises but without the "refreshing" quality of actually playing a tune, music practice is sheer penance. With young math and reading students, this is often what is offered because they cannot "play" advanced songs.



Exellent analogy!

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Posted: March 27 2007 at 4:57am | IP Logged Quote JennyMaine

Those are great points.

I think that's why I enjoy doing different unit studies with lots of hands-on projects as a balance to our schooling. To me, just books and books and more books can seem like drudgery to a child. And with special needs students, certain aspects of their education are going to feel like too much drill. You can try to be creative with it, but they need so much repitition. Rather than avoid filling that need in the basics, I try to liven up the other subjects -- history, science, art, etc. Then the balance is maintained and every subject is not boring drill.

I just love the freedom of homeschooling!



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Posted: March 27 2007 at 2:15pm | IP Logged Quote Nina Murphy

Thank you for that thorough explanation! I totally find drills laborious myself, but I suppose if you set a timer, and only give yourself (and expect from the child) a couple of minutes at it....??? Sometimes I have felt forced to go there due to need, but of course, everyone sighs through it. Maybe offering a little reward? But then I hate setting up that expectation and habit. Educating is *not* always easy, does not always come easily; but oh, how, I wish someone would design a plan that WAS. !!!!   

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Posted: March 27 2007 at 3:12pm | IP Logged Quote Willa

Helen wrote:
For me, drill and kill is providing drill to the children without enough:
discovery, real life, or "ideas".


One other thought to go alongside yours, Helen.   
A long time ago I read a textbook for education students.   The book mentioned that in Japan, the math teachers pay more attention to showing students where they are going with the basic arithmetic.   Oh, I wish Deborah S were here because she explains it better than I do. She mentioned on the cce list that she had read a bit about Asian math methods and how they differ from American ones.

So for example, the teacher would spend some time explaining a more complex, challenging problem on the board, modelling how a competent mathematician would solve it. This inspires the children and is somewhat comparable to an apprenticeship model or to what so many of us do naturally with reading or music -- that is, spend a lot of time building up enjoyment and a receptive understanding BEFORE we expect individual performance.   From the little I know about Suzuki method, this is the idea behind bringing home music to listen to, having the whole family learn the instrument at the same time, and so on.

Anyway, this idea resonated with me.   It also fits in with the one room schoolhouse and how children in large families naturally pick up how to do things merely from watching how people more skilled than they are do it.

Since internalizing this idea, I have tried to be more conscious about building up a real-life "need to know" in the child before going to the drill, and if the child is stuck, I look for what he might be missing in his "life base" of knowledge.



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Posted: March 27 2007 at 8:46pm | IP Logged Quote Willa

Oh dear, when I posted my thoughts I was trying to tie them in with yours, Helen, but I couldn't quite manage it... so I'll have to do that separately.

Helen wrote:
If your family is in some sort of life changing situation, small or large, it could be that the children have ideas to ponder. The atmosphere might be rich in oxygen already. (I posted in the other thread that CM says if children are crying over their lessons than the air is too rich in oxygen. I took that to mean "too many ideas.")

It may be too much to try to pull them through a rigorous session of schooling.

Just a thought on keeping a regulatory hand on the school year.


I thought this was a very perceptive way of thinking about it.   I am one of those moms who presently has no babies or major issues going on (besides that over-40 thing!)

For the first, say, 12 years of homeschooling -- up till about the last year and a half -- I was spending all my energy just keeping my nose and mouth above the water's surface.   Every year a pregnancy, baby, move, medical crisis, or two or more of the above.   Somehow I still had enough energy left to worry about all that I wasn't getting to.   

Still, I so MISS those days and I was thinking while I was catching up on the whole thread that there is a rare kind of energy in those new-baby, fighting to get through the day type seasons.   You put it in such good words -- it is oxygen rich.

The children were absorbing BIG ideas, life ideas.     Indeed, there was a curriculum there, and a sort of preparation of the soil.   I still can't believe my oldest, my guinea pig, made it through all that and is getting all A's at a competitive college -- he is strongest in math and Latin, forsooth, as if to point out that it wasn't ME but God developing his talents.

I am not saying it isn't difficult, but those are precious days; you will miss them someday, as I do now.

Personally, I resist a bit the idea of getting this homeschooling thing down to a science, because it's essentially an art and a relationship -- there may be generally effective principles but I wouldn't want to have one formalized way to do it for every child.   That is something I say now but when I was in the thick of it I also longed for some kind of set easy way to follow --and will again, no doubt, if we ever land in the middle of it again! but I just wanted to point out that side of it.     My youngest children may have a serene organized homeschool compared to my older set but I don't think it will be a BETTER experience because of it -- I think my older children have very rich precious memories even if, as Mrs Pepper says in the Five LIttle Peppers: They weren't properly raised, just scrambled up somehow!

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Posted: March 28 2007 at 7:36am | IP Logged Quote Mary G

WJFR wrote:
I resist a bit the idea of getting this homeschooling thing down to a science, because it's essentially an art and a relationship -- there may be generally effective principles but I wouldn't want to have one formalized way to do it for every child.   

Willa,

I love the way you put this! It ISN'T a science -- that's so true -- it is an art and needs to be an organic art at that....even with my few five children, each is SO different and I am SO different with where I am on my journey in life ... it's amazing how fun it can be when I stop trying to make it into a science and find THE curriculum or text that will work for all ...

Dear ladies: THANKS for all your wonderful thoughts on avoiding burnout ...

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Posted: March 28 2007 at 7:41am | IP Logged Quote Helen

WJFR wrote:
Oh dear, when I posted my thoughts I was trying to tie them in with yours, Helen, but I couldn't quite manage it... so I'll have to do that separately.

I thought you tied in your ideas very well. I've been wondering how to "live" math a little more.

CM used the words "too much oxygen." (Just making sure I'm giving credit to whom it belongs. )

WJFR wrote:
Personally, I resist a bit the idea of getting this homeschooling thing down to a science, because it's essentially an art and a relationship -- there may be generally effective principles but I wouldn't want to have one formalized way to do it for every child.

Willa, I believe you are right. For me, I think I need to make a slight adjustment in my overall theory of homeschooling. I really hope that by thinking in terms of seasons, I can build in more "flex" into my "school". I think with this seasonal approach, if I need to delegate planning I can turn to MODG, CHC or Seton. If there aren't too many outside challenges and things are going well, I won't have to delegate.

I'm sorry I used the word "rules" in the earlier post. Those rules are for me.

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Posted: March 28 2007 at 8:02am | IP Logged Quote Karen E.

I haven't been able to follow this thread as closely as I'd like, but I think that's partly because I'm not personally feeling burn-out right now ... So, I've been thinking that I want to settle in with this thread when I have time to give it its due attention (and have a cup of coffee while reading) and delve into it as part of my spring/summer planning phase.

Lissa has a wonderful recent post at The Lilting House about tweaking and tidal homeschooling.

Willa, like Helen, I think you're so right about what you said here:

WJFR wrote:
Personally, I resist a bit the idea of getting this homeschooling thing down to a science, because it's essentially an art and a relationship -- there may be generally effective principles but I wouldn't want to have one formalized way to do it for every child.


I love that, and agree that it will never be a science, and can't be.

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Posted: March 28 2007 at 4:42pm | IP Logged Quote Helen

Karen E. wrote:
I'm not personally feeling burn-out right now ... So, I've been thinking that I want to settle in with this thread when I have time to give it its due attention (and have a cup of coffee while reading) and delve into it as part of my spring/summer planning phase.


Whenever you have the chance (or inclination) Karen, if you could explain why you don't feel burned out, I would be interested.

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Posted: March 28 2007 at 11:17pm | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Helen, Maybe it would be helpful at this point if we all defined exactly what we mean by burnout.
If it means getting tired of what we are doing and wanting to toss it all and start fresh, then perhaps I get that alot. But for me, the cure is simple: to just go ahead and toss it. But since my plans are flexible and short-term, it is no big deal to do so. For those with plans that are longer-term and more set in stone, then I could see how that feeling of wanting to toss it all would be more frustrating and discouraging, leading to a more classic burnout.

So, maybe why I don't suffer from burnout so much is that I have a certain expectation and acceptance of these feelings and a willingness to let it all go?

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Posted: March 29 2007 at 8:26am | IP Logged Quote Helen

lapazfarm wrote:
Helen, Maybe it would be helpful at this point if we all defined exactly what we mean by burnout.


I didn't answer right away because I wanted to think about this. I cam up with this analogy.

Homeschooling should be like hiking: Strenous and challenging at some points yet with an overall feeling of envigoration and success.

After a hike, one will feel tired but shouldn’t feel injured.

If you’re injured you can’t go about your normal activities. The way I’m looking at burnout is similar to becoming injured by a hike. Was the hike too much for the ability level? Was the knapsack carried incorrectly? Was there a stone in my shoe? Were my shoes the correct choice for this year's climb?

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Posted: March 29 2007 at 8:37am | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Nice analogy, Helen. And the last thing we would want is for our children to think hiking is a chore or even hate hiking, all because of an ill-fitting pair of shoes or the unwillingness to stop and take a break at certain points along the trail. It needs to be fun, not misery. I'm not saying all hikes should be a lazy walk along the river, but we need to make the hike something to look forward to, even if it is challenging. I think that is our greatest task, finding that balance.

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Posted: March 29 2007 at 10:21am | IP Logged Quote Willa

My definition is something like yours, Helen.

I would say I usually burn out because the disparity between what I want and what is actually going on is too great.   So I know I am vulnerable to burn out when:

--I'm comparing myself to people with different talents or superior talents.

--We have had some change in our lives so I can't function the way I'm used to functioning (I am pregnant or ill or there is a new baby or a difficult situation).

--I am trying to do something that is simply too hard or not fitted to the way we operate (a bit like #1 and #2 but not quite the same -- this would be more like your experience with Sound Beginnings, Helen -- I have had similar ones)

I did not burn out this year and have been trying to ponder the reasons.   TO use your hiking analogy, I tried to pause and take a few breaths BEFORE I was utterly exhausted (not necessarily a planned break, but just going back to what I consider the minimum work, and using the extra time to organize the house or talk to the kids or metaphorically enjoy the vista).   

I tried to use the right equipment for US.   I tried not to focus too much on the people who were climbing way ahead of us, and remember that it was more about the journey than how fast I would arrive.   

I DIDN'T have a baby on my back or snuggling in a sling, which of course meant less sheer fatigue to deal with than in previous years.


So, why I started my monthly focus which I wrote about on my blog -- so I could dabble a bit with the things that intimidate me or seem like a stretch for me, without making a full-sale commitment.    That would be like trying little hikes on Bunny Hill before going for the summit run     This works pretty well with the seasonal focus we were talking about on the other thread.

As you say, Helen, it's fun to be challenged and pleasantly exhausted, but where it's not fun is when you are JUST exhausted and there is no end in sight. THEN you feel like it's not a hike but a grim march.    The solution might be what Theresa said, to change tacks. I have been thinking of trying to brainstorm a Plan B and Plan C for those times -- I know this sounds a bit formal, but I'm one of those people who have a lot of trouble changing modes without a lot of planning and preparing, so maybe having some folders with back up ideas all ready as Maryan (I thought? but can't find it, maybe it was on the other thread?) would be helpful for people who function like I do.    The monthly focus helps me to sort of plan for changes in this way, but it might work even better if I developed it a bit more -- I don't know right now, but it's interesting to think about.

(PS I edited this a bit from my first post in case anyone is getting it through email rather than reading on the board)

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Posted: March 29 2007 at 1:54pm | IP Logged Quote Tina P.

I must do a lot of my planning in my head. For me, planning is kind of like how I learn to sing a song I don't know. I just sing it in my subconscious until I figure out how to transfer that song from my subconscious to my mouth.

And the hike analogy struck me, as well. After I was cut (on the last day, to boot!) from the high school volleyball team, I decided to try out for cross country running. It consisted of two mile races run once or twice a week with tons of miles of running in between. My mom, thrifty soul that she is, bought me Sears tennis shoes. They ruined my feet and fed my loathing for running. Just as this would a child loathe school if the curriculum doesn't fit or nourish the child. Just recently, my children started balking using Lingua Mater. Though my son will be 13 in a few months, he's just not ready to take on Lingua Mater. It wasn't the right fit, for now. We backed up and are using Winston Grammar, an easy to implement and quick program. It does require that they find virtues in poetry or study pictures (which we did in Emma Serl's volumes). It is straightforward and takes no more than 10 minutes per day.

You don't necessarily have to throw the curriculum or ideas out, I've found. Maybe just set them aside for a year, maybe even two. I shared history with my kids last year and their eyes glazed over. We barely made it through chapter 1 and decided to unschool ~ to me, for this subject, it means reading lots of living books and experiencing what we could of world history (which was a pretty easy thing to do since we were living in Europe at the time) ~ on this subject and concentrate more on science. Now, we're using the SAME history book and separating the chapters with living books and activities. Now my kids are happy historians!

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Posted: March 29 2007 at 2:51pm | IP Logged Quote Nina Murphy

Helen wrote:


After a hike, one will feel tired but shouldn’t feel injured.

If you’re injured you can’t go about your normal activities. The way I’m looking at burnout is similar to becoming injured by a hike. Was the hike too much for the ability level? Was the knapsack carried incorrectly? Was there a stone in my shoe? Were my shoes the correct choice for this year's climb?


Wow---inspired. Perfectly expressed. Yes, Helen, I relate to this kind of burnout. I wish I did feel that the oxygen being breathed around here was always a life-giving force. I suppose, ultimately, we have to trust and abandon. We are not going to have perfection (or sometimes even happiness) this side of Heaven.

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