| Author | |
Ruth
Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 04 2006
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5007
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 4:10pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
Skirts
2 months ago I switched to wearing only skirts and haven't looked back. I read this wonderful book called, Dressing With Dignity, which a lot of you have read, but so far I haven't been able to come up with the right words to encourage our soon to be 13 year old and 10 year old to wear skirts when out in public. Our 17 year old read the book and did it on her own. I would love some simple words of advice.
God bless.
__________________
Ruth
mom to 7 miracles
My family blog
Loreto Rosaries
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
teachingmyown
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 20 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5128
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 4:40pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
If you figure it out, let me know!  You know my Sydney, getting a skirt on her for Mass is a challenge. Not at all like my little princesses who get offended when I ask them to wear pants when all the dresses are dirty!
What happened to your picture? You looked great. I do like your new avatar, too. Just wondering. 
__________________
In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Bridget
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2198
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 4:50pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Can you have them read parts of the book? My then 8 year old daughter heard much of Colleen's talk and was pretty convicted that way. BUt i know it's easier with a girl of 8 than one into her teens.
__________________
God Bless,
Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
Our Magnum Opus
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Cay Gibson
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 16 2005
Location: Louisiana
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5193
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 4:55pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
How is Colleen doing?
Is there a copy of her talk anywheres, Bridget?
My 9 yr old still prefers dresses and the 5 yr old practically owns nothing else.
Ruth, I've read DWD and love it.  It's the first book I read that made me understand the importance of modesty of dress. Not that I'm still not struggling with the pants issue  , but it all makes sense to me.
Love your avatar too. Absolutely love it!
Bridget, I never thought to read sections of DWD with my 9 yr old. Thanks for mentioning it.
__________________
Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Diane
Forum Pro
Joined: Feb 01 2006
Location: Ohio
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 371
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 5:09pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Ruth, I'm glad you brought this up, because despite my wishes I honestly don't think my 13yo would ever consider wearing dresses everyday, although she does for Mass. I'm sure the rest of my girls would follow suit (so to speak) if she did---the three younger girls already wear dresses much of the time. I'm just beginning to make the transition myself (and not fully there yet), and I've hoped that my example alone might inspire her. Deep down though I know she sees it as a mom thing, and she already feels too different as the only homeschooler here in our community. I've just assumed that I'd missed my window with her on this and have prayed that she would someday be convicted on her own. It seems that the older she gets, the harder it is for her to be both stylish and modest. 
Maybe I need to get the book and read it with her...or would that be too much? Would it be better to read it first myself and then offer it to her?
On a lighter note, I have to let you know that I fully expected the first words of your post after that topic heading to be "a bra."
__________________
Peace,
Diane
Mom to five fair lasses and one bonny prince
The Journey of a Mother's Heart
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Ruth
Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 04 2006
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5007
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 5:13pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Diane wrote:
On a lighter note, I have to let you know that I fully expected the first words of your post after that topic heading to be "a bra." |
|
|
I can't stop laughing
You are too funny. I needed a laugh today.
__________________
Ruth
mom to 7 miracles
My family blog
Loreto Rosaries
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mrs.K
Forum Pro
Joined: Aug 13 2006
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 298
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 9:58pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Ruth, that is so wonderful to hear that your older daughter was convicted on her own. Perhaps she could talk to her younger sisters? Do they look up to her and try to imitate her? Maybe capitalize on her influence. Or perhaps you could get the younger ones some new dresses if finances permit. Lands' End has their knit dresses on sale right now - they are very cozy and comfortable and easy to play in. Maybe they could pick out the color/print that they like? Maybe matching dresses would encourage them? Many sisters find matching lots of fun. Maybe they could learn to sew, and would want to wear the things they made? Maybe talk a little about purity and pray the Immaculate Conception chaplet with them. Talk with them about how modesty is the protector of chastity. Just tossing out several ideas - maybe one might help. And of course pray, especially to Our Lady and also St. Joseph, Protector of Virgins. But I know you are already an awesome pray-er!
__________________
Blessings,
Mrs.K
My rosariesBeads of Mercy
My blogPondered in My Heart
Jesus,I trust in You!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Erin
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5814
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 10:32pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Ruth
I wouldn't push it at this stage, just keep setting an example and with their big sister doing it as well its all to the good. 10 and 13 yr old girls in my experience are still pretty active and they may see it as a hinder. For certain situations I insist on it with my 13yr old. ie. for Church and 'going out' dinner etc. I just always gently insist that pants aren't dressy enough for the situation. If we are going somewhere like a hs gathering where I know she will be up a tree or playing soccer I leave it. Pants are more suitable then anyway.
My mum wore skirts and dresses as a 'mum' and to me that is a 'mum uniform' So I figure that the example keeping is good. I do have limits that I am very vocal on as to modesty of her shorts though. Dd13 is very modest naturally anyway. dd5 however pushes the limits When you buy their next season's clothes just start gradually changing what you purchase so that their dresses/skirts outweigh the amount of pants they own.
__________________
Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JodieLyn
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006
Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 12234
|
| Posted: Jan 09 2007 at 10:51pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
And don't forget to make gentle comments (not necessarily announcing to the whole world as that might make them self conscience) when you do see them wearing skirts.
And if you're going to get them something "new and trendy" vs handmedowns or second hand stores.. get the skirts (if you can find decent ones)
__________________
Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Erin
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5814
|
| Posted: Jan 10 2007 at 2:03am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Diane wrote:
| Deep down though I know she sees it as a mom thing, and she already feels too different as the only homeschooler here in our community. I've just assumed that I'd missed my window with her on this and have prayed that she would someday be convicted on her own. It seems that the older she gets, the harder it is for her to be both stylish and modest. |
|
|
Diane
It does get harder the older they get I agree to find the balance. Although I was very excited last season to see skirts come back in vogue and quite a few choices. It is just a matter of looking hard I particularly find it hard to find decent tops.
If you purchased a couple of outfits of skirts and tops that fit your and her criteria would this help?
__________________
Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
St. Ann
Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 20 2006
Location: Germany
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2137
|
| Posted: Jan 10 2007 at 3:43am | IP Logged
|
|
|
My dd1 just exclaimed that she doesn't have enough "cool" tops! to wear with her jeans. The peer pressure in schools at this age is just terrible. Girls can really be beasts! She is already "different" and dresses much more modestly than most in her class, that I hesitate to even suggest wearing a dress or skirt, although I have considered it many a time. In the 4th grade she did wear skirts occasionally, but this year in Gymnasium(5th-13th grades) she has not worn one once. I only see girls with beat up jeans and scrawny tops with some kind of scarf or shawl around their necks. UGH!
I have never seen the DWD book, so maybe I would find a new perspective through it...and then maybe dd also.
Do you understand me? I just don't want to set her up for being mobbed because of her clothes! But this question of how she dresses is very important and is only just beginning!!!!
__________________
Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Ruth
Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 04 2006
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5007
|
| Posted: Jan 10 2007 at 10:44am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Bridget wrote:
| Can you have them read parts of the book? . |
|
|
I need to get my book back from a friend. I will try that. Thank you.
Diane wrote:
| I've just assumed that I'd missed my window with her on this and have prayed that she would someday be convicted on her own. |
|
|
I thought exactly the same thing about my 17dd, but she's the one that did it on her own. I was very thrilled.
Mrs.K wrote:
| Maybe they could learn to sew, and would want to wear the things they made? Maybe talk a little about purity and pray the Immaculate Conception chaplet with them. Talk with them about how modesty is the protector of chastity. And of course pray, especially to Our Lady and also St. Joseph, Protector of Virgins. But I know you are already an awesome pray-er! |
|
|
I think sewing is a wonderful idea. I am going to seriously consider that for them.
What is the Immaculate Conception chaplet?
Erin wrote:
| For certain situations I insist on it with my 13yr old. ie. for Church and 'going out' dinner etc. If we are going somewhere like a hs gathering where I know she will be up a tree or playing soccer I leave it. Pants are more suitable then anyway. I do have limits that I am very vocal on as to modesty of her shorts though. When you buy their next season's clothes just start gradually changing what you purchase so that their dresses/skirts outweigh the amount of pants they own. |
|
|
I do let them wear their jeans to play and they wear skirts to Mass, but it's the everyday life I'm hoping to change, like grocery shopping, library trips, etc. We have gotten a few skirts at Good Will lately, just not for every day use.
JodieLyn wrote:
| And don't forget to make gentle comments when you do see them wearing skirts. |
|
|
Thank you so much for saying that. I tend to forget to complement them. I don't do it enough. I will try that.
St. Ann wrote:
| I have never seen the DWD book, so maybe I would find a new perspective through it...and then maybe dd also. |
|
|
I really liked it a lot. It was very easy to read. It's a small book. I think less than a 100 pages. It really changed my way of thinking about modesty. I saw things in a new light, and I'm so glad I read it.
Thank you, everyone for such great advice. I have a lot of work to do. We'll definately keep praying to St. Joseph and the Blessed Mother.
God bless.
__________________
Ruth
mom to 7 miracles
My family blog
Loreto Rosaries
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mrs.K
Forum Pro
Joined: Aug 13 2006
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 298
|
| Posted: Jan 11 2007 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Ruth,
Here is a description of the Immaculate Conception chaplet:
CHAPLET OF THE IMMACULATE CONCEPTION
The Chaplet consists of 3 groups of 4 beads, with a medal of the Immaculate Conception attached to the end. It was composed by St. John Berchmanns, S.J. and recited by him daily to obtain, through the intercession of Mary, the grace never to commit any sin against the virtue of purity.
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
O God, come to my aid; O Lord make haste to help me in my time of need.
1st - I thank Thee, O Eternal Father! for having by Thy Almighty power preserved Mary, most holy, Thy blessed daughter from the stain of original sin.
Then on the large bead say: Our Father: and on the four small beads: Hail Mary, adding each time: Blessed be the pure, most holy and Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
2nd - I thank Thee, O Eternal Son, for having by Thy wisdom preserved Mary, most holy, Thy blessed mother from the stain of original sin.
Then on the large bead say: Our Father: and on the Four small beads: Hail Mary, adding each time: Blessed be the pure, most holy and Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
3rd - I thank Thee, O Holy Ghost Eternal, for having by Thy love preserved Mary, most holy, Thy Blessed Spouse from the stain of original sin.
Then on the large bead say: Our Father: and on the four small beads: Hail Mary, adding each time: Blessed be the pure, most holy and Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
Conclude with: Glory be to the Father, to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost, as it was in the beginning, is now and will be forever. Amen
I think it is a beautiful chaplet, and purity is such an important virtue for our children. Right now I'm working on making a one of these for each of my five older children.
__________________
Blessings,
Mrs.K
My rosariesBeads of Mercy
My blogPondered in My Heart
Jesus,I trust in You!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: How can I encourage my daughters to wear
