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LisaR
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Joined: Feb 07 2005
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| Posted: Feb 07 2006 at 2:03pm | IP Logged
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ds Thomas, almost 7, is really a whiz at soccer. When he was just 14 mo old, he would find balls on his own and "dribble" them throughout the hose, and outside. He is very competitive and would drill himself through his self made obstacle courses before the age of 2, and it has only intensified. His first organized game with the very competitive parochial school league he scored 4 goals within the first 3 min and they pulled him out!
so, my question is this: he has been "discovered" by a great father/son Portuguese pair who run a training program with travel competition. When we told them "no" originally due to time and money constraints, they offered to take him on for totally free!
We are having a hard time discerning if we should continue going this route with Thomas. After all, the world can't revolve around him with 4 other siblings and a dh who is out of town every Sat!
ALthough we would never put pressue on a 7 y/o to decide for himself whether he wants to continue, we observe how he loves, and lives soccer. He counts the days, hours, minutes until his next session and sleeps with his ball. He responds well to the training and asks for more!
My main concerns are time and money. anyone have advice, experience with a child like this? Elizabeth F??
love,
__________________
Lisa
dh Tim '92
Joseph 17
Paul 14
Thomas 11
Dominic 8
Maria Gianna 5
Isaac Vincent 9/21/10! and...
many little saints in heaven!
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Elizabeth
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Real Learning
Joined: Jan 20 2005
Location: Virginia
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| Posted: Feb 08 2006 at 9:16am | IP Logged
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Lisa,
Elizabeth asked me to respond to your post.
As you may know, two of our three oldest (Michael 17 and Patrick 11) are very involved in competitive travel soccer. As a telelvision producer, I have worked with many collegiate soccer programs since 1988 and Major League Soccer (America's top professional league) since 1996. I also produced the 2002 World Cup for ABC/ESPN. Soccer sort of runs through the veins of our family! Your Thomas sounds very much like our Michael and Patrick. They were extremely advanced for their age, scored at will and, were extrememly disciplined/hyper-focused when it came to practice. Their success in "house" leagues often led to them being removed from games or to them being asked not to score in favor of keeping the games "close" and allowing less developed kids an opportunity to score. These are topics for another post!
More directly to your question however, we've always tried to frame their participation and their direction forward keeping in mind a few things:
1) If soccer is what they truly enjoy at this stage of their lives, we have an obligation to support their interests as much as is appropriate relative to our family responsibilities.
2) Sports are a great model for life.
- We are expected to compete fairly with/against others everyday.
- We are required to work alongside many people (some whom we like and some whom we like less) in order to accomplish goals larger than ourselves.
- With other members of our "team/company", we experience victory and defeat.
- Together we celebrate the victories and together we are expected to move forward when we fall short.
3) If our sons were brilliant musicians, mathematicians, theologians, etc., would we be encouraged to elevate their training and experiences in those fields? If so, why not in athletics?
Having a well-regarded player in Thomas, the world of competitive/travel soccer will bring you in contact with many imposters. Coaches who invest in results and paychecks rather than the skill and character development of their players. Many times these coaches have recruited the top players who've developed early skill sets. These decisions are made with little or no regard to a player's character. Most often, these teams experience early success and then begin to fall apart as character issues begin to tear at the inner-fabric of the team and other teams begin to develop around them.
In the end, it is our firm belief that well-rounded, well-educated, well-formed people are successful no matter where they may ultimately be called. Our son's coaches are all quality people as well as quality coaches. They are all men who exemplify standards that we wish to see in our sons as they grow up.
In ten years, Thomas may or may not be a great soccer player. In fact, he may or may not be playing soccer at all. But in ten years, if he has been surrounded by quality adults who share your vision of what it means to be a person of substance, you've virtually guaranteed his success as he moves into adulthood.
I hope this perspective is helpful. Please know I'd be happy to discuss our particular experiences in more detail or help answer any specific questions you may have as you move forward.
My best,
Mike Foss
__________________
Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: a Soccer Star? how to manage gifts
