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AnaB
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 9:37am | IP Logged
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Hi Ladies,
Well, after seeking much counsel, praying, about 4 weeks ago my dh and I became "open" to the Lord to bless us with more children. I'm 2 months shy of 35, I have 4 children, I was not going to look at the calendar and plan or worry in any way....God may not choose to bless us with more.
It didn't take long! We are expecting our 5th blessing! Now, if things go as predicted, all of my children's birthdays will be in Dec./Jan. Hard on the pocketbook!
Here's where I need help! I have very hard, sick pregnancies. I end up on bedrest on and off during the whole thing. I do have a mom 4 blocks away, but she usually doesn't physically help me even after the baby. She will pick things up at the store for me and bring me some meals, though. I do have a wonderful, new church family, but I'm not sure what they will do. I know that this is OUR family and I need to be able to adjust things the best I can to handle it.
What are some adjustments that would be good to start making in our home and school so that this time be a more joyful time for all of us instead of a time of frequent emotional breakdowns and chaos? How can I adjust our schooling to make things run more smoothly? All suggestions and tips welcome!
THank you ever so much!
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His By Grace, AnaB blessed WIFE to Jeff and mama to 4 blessings!
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AnaB
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 9:38am | IP Logged
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I thought I needed to add that we just were given a hen with 5 new chicks and we live in the city and have NO clue what we're doing, our kitchen is about to be completely remodeled and expanded, and hurricane season is almost here (we live in Miami, FL). I'm trying not to stress.
Thanks!
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His By Grace, AnaB blessed WIFE to Jeff and mama to 4 blessings!
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Bridget
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 10:43am | IP Logged
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Congratulations Ana! Sounds like you are in for a wild ride!
Here are my tips I wrote up after my last baby when it was fresh in my head.
TIPS FOR GRAND MULTIPS
Having just delivered my seventh baby, my first baby in my forties, I decided to write out the things that helped in this pregnancy and the things I wish I had thought of. It was my most taxing pregnancy. If I am blessed again, maybe having these ideas thought out ahead of time will be helpful.
We all know this one but I have generally ignored it. Now that I'm older, I can't really get away with ignoring it anymore. Start getting in shape before you get pregnant! For those in the 'baby a year' club that means starting right after your six week check up.
For me, the simplest, most profitable activities seem to be walking, stair climbing and crunches designed for upper and lower abs.
First trimester nausea can start pretty quickly after the positive pregnancy test, so you don't always have time to prepare. Thinking about ways to handle it can be hard when you're in the middle of it. Here are some ideas.
If you're a grand multip you probably have kids old enough to help. Get everyone on the same team. Tell them they are warriors fighting for their family. Assign a big kid to a little kid. The big kids can get snacks, drinks, change diapers, help potty, put on coats and mittens, and strap littles in their car seats. Mom should double check that one for safety and be the one to do the head count.
Those wonderful children can help move laundry along, unload and load the dishwasher, pick up toys, vacuum, sweep, wipe down bathrooms (disposable bathroom and window wipes are great for this)…almost any household job. They may not do it as well as mom can, but now is not the time to worry about it. Having the job done, even a little sloppily is better than not having it done. They do get better with practice.
An occasional reward, like a little bag of m-n-m's or one of those individual bags of chips, can go along way towards keeping the kid's morale up.
If you are home schooling, on your worst days it's hard to keep going. If you can splurge, this is a great time for books on tape; self-directed learning games for the computer or something like the Leapfrog line of electronic learning games. Remember that the kids are always learning. If all they learn is how to help around the house and serve their family, that is huge.
Food prep is a biggie when you are exhausted and nauseous. In the morning put together a crock pot dinner and plug it in out on the deck or garage so the food odors are not in the house. Keep it simple. Take advantage of fresh cut vegetables and bag salad from the produce section. Snack on fresh fruit. It won't kill your family to eat more mac and cheese, frozen, canned and convenience food dinners for this short season.
Don't skimp on good pre-natal vitamins.
Mixing sports drinks with sparkling water may help to sooth a nauseous tummy and keep you well hydrated hydrated. Give up or cut way down on the caffeine. Try to get some fresh air each day, no matter how much you don't want to make the effort.
Migraine headaches are a major problem in early pregnancy. Tylenol every 4 hours just barely takes the edge off. Cold or warm compresses on the head or back of the neck may help. Regular coke seems to bring some short term relief. Lying in a dark, quiet room helps but that situation is hard to come by for a grand multip. One eight ounce cup of coffee is allowed may help
Physically and mentally the last trimester can be over whelming. I get very big… big placenta, big baby, and get tired of the comments. It also makes it hard to get housework and projects done. If definitely helps to have a sense of humor about this. Get a few maternity clothes in a bigger size.
Keep walking and getting fresh air. Swimming is an excellent activity for this stage of pregnancy.
Drink red raspberry tea. (It helps tone and prepare the uterus to do it's work.)
Braxton Hicks may start as early as 30 weeks and can be hard. I keep thinking labor is going to start, until I remind myself that it's not real labor, it's just my body practicing.
Plan to slow down the schedule if you can, as early as 28 weeks.
The waiting is hard, stock up on new books or movies. Look for something light and distracting. This probably isn't the best time to tackle Thomas Aquinas.
Make a one-week menu for all three meals. Plan on shopping at one store and repeat it till after the baby if you are too tired to cope with planning. Ask your husband to do the shopping if it is too much for you.
Eat lots of fresh fruit and drink sports drinks to stay hydrated. The heat of summer and the dryness of home heating and cooling systems can make it difficult to get enough fluids. Being dehydrated can cause early contractions. Even if they aren't dilating you, they are uncomfortable and confusing about what is happening.
Aches and pains seem to be worse at night. Try a bellyband to relieve the round ligament pain. Sometimes sleeping in a recliner might be easier than dealing with the round ligament pain from rolling over and getting out of bed. For leg cramps, it may help to try a good source of extra calcium. Heartburn is often relieved by chewing gum. Don't sleep with gum in your mouth though!
The beginning and end of pregnancy can be challenging and gets more so as we age and have larger families to care for. Remember that this is such a short season and the reward of that sweet baby is so worth it. Stay close to God. Spend more time in prayer and reading scripture. Remind yourself that your house WILL get back under control. After the baby you will even be able to tie your own shoes again!
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God Bless,
Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
Our Magnum Opus
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Christine
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 11:44am | IP Logged
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Congratulations! 
I can't offer any suggestions, but I am thankful for Bridget's advice.
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Christine
Mommy to 4 girls, 5 boys, & 2 in God's care
Memories of a Catholic Wife and Mother
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Elizabeth
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 1:16pm | IP Logged
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Ana,
I'm having a migraine day of a pregnancy that sounds like yours. Today, I'll offer it for you. As soon as I can, I'll post some practical suggestions. Congratulations!
__________________
Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Sarah
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| Posted: April 28 2006 at 2:52pm | IP Logged
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AnaB-
Oh, I know nausea. My pregnancies have been all sick, sick, sick. 
Every time it comes around again, I always say I'm going to turn the crib or a bathtub into a gigantic laundry basket. My dh always balks at the idea, claiming it won't get that bad, but it always does--- Clean and dirty mixed, knee-deep. Next time. . . 
Here are my suggestions-
1. get a holding zone for clean laundry--dump laundry baskets in it and make everyone dig for clothes(this is if you have all young people who need to be facilitated)This could be a HUGE basket, an unused bed, crib, train table, etc.
2. use paper plates, cups, etc.
3. don't beat yourself up for letting things fall apart for a while. Honestly, I get so sick that I'm in bed or on the couch for weeks. I can only sit at the table for a matter of minutes. Car rides are out completely, can't go near the grocery store, can't read, can't stand the computer, everyone stinks, everything stinks, certain colors make me sick, etc. etc.
4. evaluate how important the hen & chicks are--if they bring you joy, then great, if they make you sicker--consider giving them away and start the project another time.
5. Get a strip of hooks hung up, preferably in the bathroom, that has each kid's name on it. Have them hang their towels on it and make them reuse them several times.
6. Get some baby wipes to have near you when some little person needs to be their face or hands wiped
7. Switch to disposable diapers if you are using cloth
8. get some decent DVD's or books on tape for desperate moments, and DON'T feel guilty if your kids watch videos.
9. Don't feel bad about getting some workbooks from Seton or CHC, or whomever. . .
Hang in there. . .
Pray and offer your suffering.
__________________
Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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AnaB
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I'm keeping a list! Thank you ladies. Today I'm in the throes of nausea. I've still been able to function somewhat. I took the kids to the park, but I lost my sunglasses and the brightness and the heat....we didn't last long. So, 2yod fell asleep on the way home and is now napping, and the older three are in the pool. I'm going to crash on the couch!
I'm trying to plan long term as well, (newborn days), and look to start adjusting things now for then, especially with school. I don't know if there's much I could change. One of my boys is still not reading independently enough, but they both need help with math and grammar and reading. I did get a treat, the dishes were washed for me after breakfast and lunch. I'll be up to check the boards again soon!
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His By Grace, AnaB blessed WIFE to Jeff and mama to 4 blessings!
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kristina
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AnaB,
Congratulations !!
I will keep you in my prayers.
Bridget,
You should write a book! What great advice you offer. I think I will print up your advice for possible future use .
Blessings,
__________________
kristina
yesterthoughts
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Leonie
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| Posted: April 29 2006 at 12:24am | IP Logged
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Congratulations, AnaB! 
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Leonie in Sydney
Living Without School
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mary
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| Posted: April 29 2006 at 6:44am | IP Logged
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congratulations ana! what a great list you all have made.
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Erica Sanchez
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Wonderful news, Ana! You're in my prayers!
__________________
Have a beautiful and fun day!
Erica in San Diego
(dh)Cash, Emily, Grace, Nicholas, Isabella, Annie, Luke, Max, Peter, 2 little souls ++, and sweet Rose who is legally ours!
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Cay Gibson
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Congratulations, Ana!
__________________
Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
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Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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AnaB
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| Posted: May 03 2006 at 8:27am | IP Logged
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Thank you so much for the encouragement and congratulations! You would not believe some of the negative comments I've received! The ultimate was one lady asking, "Isn't she concerned about global warming?" My dh replied in his cheeky way, "Yes, God said he would one day destroy the earth by fire, we'd better get ready!"
I do appreciate the good reactions I've received. I know to not wait or look for the approval of others. The Lord has filled me with such peace and joy since the news. His grace has been sufficient.
So, far the fresh lemon juice in water has made the nausea manageable. I'm also taking high vitamin cod liver oil.
My biggest nesting concern or preoccupation is how to adjust our homeschooling and running of our home to make this a smoother transition. One suggestion a mom of 7 gave me yesterday was to stay home. Neither of us have done any park groups, co-ops, or enrichment classes. But it has been the most stress free year we've ever had, even with the 2yr. old. We do get together with other families for fellowship, we are active at church, travel with dh, and dh has really taken an intrest in nature study and we've done a few local hikes.
I guess part of me would like to be a fly on the wall at the home of a mother with many and just see how they run their day and school. The practical aspects allude me (sp?). I'm not even sure how to articulate my question!
I do appreciate the tips so far and am keeping track of them as I progress. Since I've had twins before, there is an increased risk of twins. When I had my twin boys and my 2yr. old daughter, my dh was working 3 jobs (one was night shift), I had no help, and no visitors. I had frequent (several times a day) anxiety attacks and strong ppd. I'm so scared to go through that again. I do realize our situation is different now and I'm a different person and that God's grace for me will be sufficient.
I am showing alot for being so early. Is that just because this is baby #5? I already don't fit into any or my clothes (bottoms) exept for 3 skirts and that won't last long. I'm only a few weeks along.
THank you for letting me share my heart and for you sharing your heart with me!
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His By Grace, AnaB blessed WIFE to Jeff and mama to 4 blessings!
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Cay Gibson
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AnaB wrote:
I am showing alot for being so early. Is that just because this is baby #5? |
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From my experience, yes!
#5 is a sweet, sweet # though.
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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Anne Marie M
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Ana,
Congratulations! I do like your dh's reply. A sense of humor goes far in dealing with the comments!
As far as showing early, it could be because it's baby #5. I have six, and showed earlier with each one. People often figured out that we were expecting before we were ready to tell them. 
Good luck to you!
Anne Marie
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Sarah
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Unfortunately by #5 our stomach muscles don't respond like they used to.  I am bigger looking with each one, but measure right on when I'm on my back. The doc just says its lack on tone. 
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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AnaB
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That's comforting to know in a way. I definitely have no muscle tone right now! I am just a few weeks along and I can't wear ANY of my clothes except 3 skirts.
I'm not where I could fit into maternity clothes yet, so I bought some unattractive draw string pants at Target yesterday. I hope I can make them work!
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His By Grace, AnaB blessed WIFE to Jeff and mama to 4 blessings!
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ElisabethGrace
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Congratulations Ana!
Angela
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Dawnie
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Congratulations, Ana!
I am expecting my 4th baby, and although my pregnancies haven't been as difficult as yours, here are some homeschooling tips that have worked for me on difficult days.
On difficult days (either before or after the birth), I have homeschooled in my nightgown from the couch. I just have dd bring her schoolbooks into the living room and she works there. I can answer questions or provide direction from a comfortable position. After my 3rd was born, I taught most of kindergarten in my nightgown from the couch while I was nursing the baby. The baby was happy as long as she was latched on. I don't remember what my 2-year-old was doing, but whatever it was, it must not have required much effort on my part to keep her happy! We didn't do a lot of art projects and hand-on kinds of learning, but we got through the basics and dd was ready for 1st grade. Mission accomplished!
Good luck and God bless you for welcoming this new life!
Dawn
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Visit my blog!Water Into Wine:Vino Per Tutto!
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teachingmom
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Congratulations, Ana!
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~Irene (Mom to 6 girls, ages 7-19)
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: HELP!
