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Sarah
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 2:13pm | IP Logged
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Is daily Mass a part of your school year this year? Our parish only offers a 7:00am Mass and I really feel guilty that we never make it. We would have to be on the road by 6:40am to make it in time, which means everyone up even earlier than that.
The older children would benefit, but I can't seem to get everyone out the door in time. Plus, I feel guilty that the little ones would be tired and hungry.
And selfishly, I wonder how I'll get everything done if I'm SO tired. . .
Any thoughts on this? How do you do it? There are hs ladies at my parish doing it with little people like me. Maybe I'm just lazy.
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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Philothea
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 3:22pm | IP Logged
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I don't think you're lazy. Is there another parish nearby that has more reasonable daily Mass hours? I know my parish only offers 6:30 and 8:30 AM, and I can't make it to either of those, so we go to the next parish over for 9AM or 12 noon Mass. It's worth it with a two year old to make sure the times are optimal for his best behavior. But I have the luxury of multiple parishes in a five-mile radius, so if you're out in the country this might not work for you.
Could you start at just once a week other than Sunday? You don't have to be a daily communicant immediately -- you can work up to that as the younger kids get older. And what time does your husband leave for work? Could he watch the littles while you take the bigger ones? You'd be back before 8 AM. Just a thought.
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theresa-lynn
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 3:39pm | IP Logged
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It's taken me many years to get into the habit of daily mass.. so I know the guilt feelings of not going, especailly when there is one so conviently close to you.
I have been going to mass all spring and summer at 8 am at a parish that is about 20 min away too... I am 6 months pregnant, I have a 16 month old, a 3 year old and an almost 6 year old. This seemed impossible to me last year, and still does some mornings, but I force myself to go because I know that I need the graces of mass more that I need that extra hour of calmness at home. The days I don't make it always seem to go worse than the days I am faithful to my commitment and go.
Now if it was at 7am it would be a lot harder of a battle, but I would likely try to adjust everyone's bedtime routine earlier the night before, and I would also likely be able to have my husband there if it was that early, so that would help too.
I make little 'rules' for myself in the morning that allow me to actually make it out of the house in time. These have helped me in more ways than just getting to mass btw:
1) never hit the snooze button.. offer up that loss of an extra 10 min of sleep as a prayer for something
2) never go downstairs without making my bed, and getting dressed.
3) have my shower the night before to make step 2 easier
4) train the children to never go downstairs without first making their beds and getting dressed
5) never take the baby downstairs without changing her diaper and getting her dressed.
6) don't even turn on the computer until after you get home, lest you get sucked into the 'just one more email' vortex
7) try to fit in a quick bite of cereal for everyone before you go, but if you don't have time
8) bring a snack in the car for the kids (don't forget the diaper wipes so you can clean it off thier faces and hands before going into church).
9) pray pray pray and ask for God's help. If he's the one who wants you there, he can help you get there.
It sounds like a lot, but for my slow, lazy self, these rules really help me to get out the door on time. Many many days I wish I didn't feel 'called' to go to daily mass but I know the graces I recieve from going are what get me through the rest of the day.
Don't feel overwhelmed by the whole thing. Make a commitment to go one day extra a week and stick to it... see how it goes, and pray lots for God's direction. He will show you if it's his will for you to go to that mass each day.
hth,
Melanie in Canada
Our Lady of Tuscany Academy
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Maddie
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 4:22pm | IP Logged
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theresa-lynn wrote:
1) never hit the snooze button.. offer up that loss of an extra 10 min of sleep as a prayer for something
2) never go downstairs without making my bed, and getting dressed.
3) have my shower the night before to make step 2 easier
4) train the children to never go downstairs without first making their beds and getting dressed
5) never take the baby downstairs without changing her diaper and getting her dressed.
6) don't even turn on the computer until after you get home, lest you get sucked into the 'just one more email' vortex
7) try to fit in a quick bite of cereal for everyone before you go, but if you don't have time
8) bring a snack in the car for the kids (don't forget the diaper wipes so you can clean it off thier faces and hands before going into church).
9) pray pray pray and ask for God's help. If he's the one who wants you there, he can help you get there.
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What great advice! We are trying to make daily Mass a habit in our family, at least 2-3 days a week anyway. There shouldn't be any reason for us NOT to go, Mass is at NOON each day and occasionally at 2pm, woohoo! God bless our parish priest!
I can't imagine a 7 am. I guess I would aim for once a week. It seems easiest for me to plan outings coming off a weekend (a Monday, that way I can plan and organize on Sunday with dh help) or going into a weekend (Friday, dh will be home to help). I like Tues, Wed, Thurs. to be solid stay at home days.
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~Maddie~
Wife to my dh and Momma of 9 dear ones
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teachingmyown
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 4:34pm | IP Logged
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Sarah,
I have struggled with this for years. I used to go a couple of times a week when we lived near a Church with a 12noon Mass. We had four kids then.
Our only option is a 9am Mass 25 minutes away. I am not a morning person and have a very hard time getting out the door for anything. I am sure if I pushed we could do it, but we would also be hard-pressed to get back and get to work and still have a productive day.
I think the suggestions of working up to it are good. I would wait until you get a good start on your school year. But don't feel guilty, this vocation is hard enough. 
If you take the time in the mornings to pray about it, I think you will find the right answer for your family now, which may not be the same answer as last year or next year.
God bless you.
__________________
In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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aussieannie
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| Posted: Aug 22 2006 at 5:45pm | IP Logged
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Dear Sarah,
Firstly I think it is important not to think negatively about why it seems a very hard task at present. When you look around at others who do, their ableness to get there might because it is much easier for them. They might be natural ‘morning’ people or have better energy levels and health. It might be a routine that they have done for years and years and on a day that they did not go for some reason, you can be sure that they are lying wide awake in bed at the time they usually would be getting up for Mass!  Their children are also well conditioned, after months/years of doing it, so getting a lot of children out the door is not so superhuman. So it is not really an issue of laziness at all but different conditions that need to be adjusted to, over time.
If this is a strong desire upon your heart to do this, you probably need to make a list of all the possible obstacles and formulate a plan as to what could change the present difficult situation. Mainly it is all about reconditioning ourselves and it takes time and initially, harder efforts to do that. Here is a possible list of what I might do with the things you have mentioned...
Spend a week putting them to bed an hour earlier and wake them at the time normally needed to get ready for Mass. In that week of adjustment you just get the household going earlier but do not give them breakfast until the hour you would normally come home from Mass. To help offset hunger problems, what about a special snack before going to bed, for the littlies, like a cookie and milk?
In fact you could make it 9 days of preparation (or 18 if you do a double novena, one being for thanksgiving), this way when the children arise you can say a novena prayer in preparation for this special change, help encourage them to be enthusiastic about what will soon be happening. Why not work particularly with “The Weight of the Mass” and if you have Catholic Mosaic, doing the activites for the book in that time frame. Reading any books that talk about the innumerable benefits of attending Mass is also important, especially for your older children and yourself.
We are such creatures of habit! When I get in the habit of going to bed later at night, it is a hard thing to break – if I want to sleep-in the morning, I know that this is a very hard thing to do! If I want the children to do something promptly and easily, it becomes easy once it is a part of their life. Eating food at certain times of the day is also habit-forming and changing will also take time.
Lastly I would say have a quick look at Helen’s blog and her current posting, she talks about prayer but as we know, the Mass is the highest form of prayer and so you can apply her thoughts to it in a help as motivation with such a good idea, here is her thoughts.
__________________
Under Her Starry Mantle
Spiritual Motherhood for Priests
Blessed with 3 boys & 3 girls!
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Sarah
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| Posted: Aug 23 2006 at 11:37am | IP Logged
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Thanks everyone. Your advice is really helpful. I'm going to aim for Fridays to begin with.
Of course, the last week or so the baby (13 mo)has been waking EVERY hour!! . . . and wanting to nurse and nurse and nurse. It has been very difficult to have any energy. I just don't see at this point, if the mysterious waking continues how I could manage it more than once a week. I can't figure out why he wakes--perfectly happy and nursing throughout the day, no runny nose, no apparent food allergies. It seem like my babies at this age all went through period of frequent waking. It really makes me want to cut back on everything that requires energy. Maybe he's teething?
We are soon to get a new priest assigned at our parish. I'm going to ask him to bring the 5:15pm Mass back (it was removed this last year). We made it then, even though dinner was delayed, it still worked out with a snack.
There is a noon Mass downtown, but its really not an option since there are many factors that make it even harder (distance, parking, naps, etc. . .)
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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humanaevitae
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Sarah,
Maybe your confessor would have some direction for you. Mine encouraged me to have more daily prayer and perhaps add in a daily Mass during Lent to start with. I am not a morning person and I knew I would spend the rest of the day napping and yelling at the kids. He thought it was more my pride talking (how can others do it and why can't I, poor terrible me) and not that God was really putting it on my heart. Just a thought.
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Nicole-Zane 10, Elizabeth 7, Xavier 4, and John Patrick 2
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Sarah
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| Posted: Aug 25 2006 at 12:55pm | IP Logged
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Good thought Nicole! I get stuck with comparing myself to others.
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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stacykay
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| Posted: Aug 25 2006 at 2:27pm | IP Logged
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Hi Sarah,
I am very much on the slow side to working up to Mass on a daily basis.
I started off with First Saturday Mass. And this was somewhat easy, even though it began at 7am, it was just me (dh and dc were still sleeping  ) and some friends. Then we would go to breakfast, afterwards, so it really wasn't any sort of sacrifice  .
After a few years! of this, I added First Fridays. And that is where we are, still. I would like to add on every Friday, but I really am a chicken with the 2yo . I am thinking next year we can add it on.
I would love to go each day, and I know as the boys get older it will be easier; and then, of course, once they're grown and gone  , I'll have loads of time.
There are many in my hs group who go daily, and I know they benefit so much from it.
I'll keep plodding along.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Daily Mass?
