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missionfamily
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With Lent around the corner, I've been thinking a lot about what an awesome responsbility it is to be charged with the role of "the heart of our home."
For me, this has always meant we as wives and mothers set the tone for the nurturing and growth that takes place within our families, spiritual, physical, and emotional.
We work hard to keep things flowing properly so the head can think clearly.
We make the "womb" of our home a safe, healthy place to grow.
And we keep the life flowing to all our family appendages and outreaches.
What are your thoughts on what it means to be the heart of your home? As a wife/mother/Christian in today's world?
How can we use that role to enhanceour family's Lenten experience?
Another thing I've always thought this role means is that we set the tone for our homes.
How can our inward disposition, our own spiritual preparation help our families'?
What can we do now to prepare our own hearts and those of our home to gather the most grace as we approach Lent?
__________________
Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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msclavel
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Colleen, I've been thinking about this post all day long. I have some thoughts.
You say:
How can our inward disposition, our own spiritual preparation help our families'?
This is precisely where the Lord had been convicting my heart this month. I think, right now, in our home this is what can make or break us as a family. My prayer life is suffering a bit. I know it needs to be better. I have recommitted to the Divine Office. I love this prayer of the Church. There is no better way I know for the Lord to speak to my heart. In the past, it has always been the case that the Office would "speak" to my heart and draw more deeply into the liturgy and closer to our Lord. When I am living this inward disposition, it shows without my having to say a word. I love my children and dh with Christ's love. My heart feels the urgency of getting their precious souls into heaven.
Oh, I have so much more on my mind about this...but dinner calls...
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Elizabeth
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Inward disposition...gather grace...
I love that image of gathering grace.
I have lots of thoughts and they've been rumbling around for several months now. I was really disoriented after Sarah Anne was born. My life felt chaotic in a way it never had with other babies. At first, I thought it was that my house was such a wreck following bedrest (and I'm sure that was part of it). But, a couple of friends help me better identify the problem. I'd grown into a very deep and concentrated prayer life during the last part of my pregnancy. As difficult as that time was in our lives, it was very peaceful for us as a family. I learned what it meant to take strength and grace from nearly constant prayer. When bedrest was over, life picked up as usual and I lost my prayer rhythm. It totally threw me for a loop.
Elisabeth Leseur writes that it is silly to look for someone to understand us in the world when God understands us perfectly.[poor paraphrase--I'll find the quote later] When I read that and took it to prayer, I thought about all the times during the day when I make a phone call or read a blog post or scan the message boards or email someone in search of understanding. Often those are restless times. We are reminded that our hearts will be restless unless they rest in Christ. If I take just three or four of those times of nearly mindless searching, spread the throughout the day, and turn instead to prayer, spiritual reading, and scripture, then I tap into the strength and grace I need to love my family and serve them well.
That doesn't mean we don't need women friends. I think we do. And it was holy women who really helped me recognize and grow into this idea. What matters is that our every moment is focused on God. When we return again and again throughout the day to prayer and scripture, it keeps us focused. In that way, then even those conversations we have with other women become stepping stones to sanctity, particularly if they are women who also have active prayer lives.
Sarah "calls" 
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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dawn2006
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Elizabeth - that reminds me of something I read in "Apostolate of Holy Motherhood" (I think) about how modern people are too quick to turn to support groups and such when they should be turning to Jesus. I didn't like it when I first read that but it's been a few years and I haven't forgotten it so..there you go. Must have made an impression on purpose!
Colleen - you asked about how our own inward disposition and spiritual life can help our families. To share - the last couple of months I've been keeping to a semi-regular devotional afternoon time of about 30 minutes. The biggest blessing I've seen that have on my family is it helps me to stay fresh in the Word and other studies so I can naturally share them with my family. You know - I grew up with no religion or spirituality so I am piecing my own 'religous motherhood' together as I go. I find it such a huge overflow of grace to be able to authentically share what I've learned and internalized for myself with my children. I say authentic cuz sometimes when reading religion lessons or such I feel stilted but this devotional time is really helping me to share with my family as naturally as if I was sharing a top news story of the day. KWIM?
I don't know what it means to me to be the heart of my home, as you mentioned. I am only just beginning to come out of the fog of the physical demands of early motherhood to start focusing more intentionally on the traditions and lessons and rhythms and puroses that I want for my family. It's only been in the last year that I've been struck with the magnitude of the influence that I actually do have in our lives.
Boy - I just typed out all kinds of ramblings. Must have struck a nerve. Thank you! :)
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Dawn Farias | wife to Ariel | mom to Gabriel 9, Daniel 7, Elizabeth 5, and Michael 3 | blogger at Be Absorbed | native Texan but currently living near Seattle
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Mackfam
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missionfamily wrote:
| What are your thoughts on what it means to be the heart of your home? As a wife/mother/Christian in today's world? |
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Just as the heart is rhythmical, I think there is a certain rhythm that the heart of the home follows. Rhythm in prayer first of all...so a prayer life that is fluid and faithful. Rhythm in step with the head of the home...so that we complement each other and offer support to each other. Rhythm in life with the children...so that they each know unconditional love. Rhythm in the everyday...these would be routines and the practicals.
This rhythm may speed up depending on circumstances, or slow down...but always there is a persistent rhythm to the heart of the home. She is interiorly quiet. This doesn't preclude thought or activity - life may be bustling - but interiorly, the heart of the home moves rhythmically through her days in prayer and in action. I'm thinking of a Marian example here...not my own, btw!
I think when we move off that rhythm - the one the Creator stamped in our hearts - we begin to feel interior disquiet.
I often think of how Our Lady did not need to speak or gush or even wonder aloud at the great mystery unfolding before her eyes...she pondered all these treasures, these mysteries in her heart. Isn't that powerful? I want to be like that. I want to consider thoughtfully, inwardly, in my heart. I want to take in every treasured moment and ponder it, turning it over and over again in my heart so that the movement of that thought changes me, softens me, and opens my heart even more to grace.
missionfamily wrote:
How can we use that role to enhanceour family's Lenten experience?
Another thing I've always thought this role means is that we set the tone for our homes.
How can our inward disposition, our own spiritual preparation help our families'?
What can we do now to prepare our own hearts and those of our home to gather the most grace as we approach Lent?
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I agree with you so much, Colleen. in that the heart sets the tone for the home! It's often easy for me to see the tone I set - the children reflect it back to me! If I have been distracted, wrapped up in self, inattentive, pushing or demanding - they reflect all these back to me. My knee jerk reaction is to wonder what in the world is going on and start cracking the whip! But, grace provides an inward glance and I see the children are reflecting my lack of rhythm...my interior disquiet.
In closely following the rhythm of Holy Mother Church we are drawn into her mysteries and with quiet there is time for contemplation and meditation - even by the littlest. I have seen it. So, I see my role during Lent as one who guards quiet and carves out spaces so that there is opportunity for pondering. In order to set this tone, I must first be disposed to quiet myself.
Just thinking out loud...
**Identify areas I am leaking grace...
~ Am I attentive faithfully to the one thing needful? If my prayer life unravels everything else does too...in a hurry! Eyes on Him!
~ Am I overly worried or anxious when I need to surrender and Trust His perfect plan?
~ Am I impatient with God's timing, my children's abilities, my husband's limitations? Back to Trust.
~ Am I focused on something shallow/trivial/tangential?
~ Do I prayerfully consider and ponder in the quiet and protection of Our Lady's heart...or do I react loudly?
~ Have I identified a vice that is stubborn and embedded? Confession!
~ Am I looking around at others...focus on my own weaknesses and on other's strengths and keep interior focus on Our Lord.
**Identify sources of noise...
~ Too much activity?
~ Too little routine and rhythm in the day?
~ Are my expectations way too high?
~ Have I punctuated the day with periods of silence - visually and otherwise?
~ Is there beauty in my home - our surroundings?
**Carve out spaces and consider the natural...
~ Consider the home as sacred space - where may I set out holy reminders to assist our season of prayer and penitence?
~ Consider the placement of holy reminders - do they invite one to consider them? or get lost in a sea of other visual noise?
~ What steps can I take in my home to take us more deeply into the desert for 40 days?
**The rhythm of Lent...
~ What is the family plan? family focus? for prayer, fasting and almsgiving?
~ Consider the family meals...how can I provide nutrition and filling meals while trimming them of excess and decadence?
~ Will we add any new prayers to the family evening prayers for Lent?
~ Help children consider their sacrifices...introduce the idea of offering obedience as a gift.
~ Provide a calendar or an image of some kind so the children can visualize how long the journey into the desert with Our Lord will be.
In my heart, this is how I am preparing to enter this holy season with my family, this is what I'm turning over in prayer.
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Servant2theKing
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These are all such beautiful thoughts and so fitting as we prepare for Lent. As mothers, and the hearts of our homes, may we be more fully united with the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Consecrating our families and our homes to the Hearts of Jesus and Mary offers supernatural grace to strengthen us where we are weak, to help us overcome that which is not of the Lord and to strengthen and encourage us in our efforts to sanctify ourselves and our Domestic Church.
A helpful resource, from Women for Faith and Family, is:
http://www.wf-f.org/SacredHeartEnthronement.html
(look for extra links, toward the bottom, for several inspired articles by Bishop Burke)
Individual and family prayertime are the lifeblood that keeps the hearts of families spiritually healthy...the world and its trappings continually strive to distract or pull us away from giving the Lord our hearts in prayer.
In a tangible way, certain things can assist us in making prayer a primary focus of our lives;
...a family prayer binder
...baskets filled with prayer cards or leaflets
...hooks or special holders for Rosaries or Chaplets
...picture books, statues and holy images that bring the liturgical season alive for younger, and older, family members (toddlers seem particularly drawn to kissing the crucifix)
...special prayer candles
...places and times specifically dedicated to prayer
...a home environment carefully appointed with holy reminders of our faith
...based on earlier threads, the word Oremus (let us pray) might be a helpful reminder to display in our home
...blessing family members as they wake or sleep, or as they come and go from our Domestic Church (this is especially helpful with teens whose hearts are pulling toward the world or adulthood, but who truly need the security of knowing they still have a place in our hearts)
...patience with ourselves, and our families, when we stray from our ideal in upholding our prayer life (several inspired writings have helped me see that prayer is not an all or nothing practice to be abandoned when we fail...it is a relationship with our Lord! When we become distracted or lax in approaching Him, He gently, lovingly, calls us back, time and time again...just as we must do with our loved ones as well!
The Church has been so wise and gracious in giving us so many forms of prayer and sacramentals to assist us in keeping our hearts focused on the Lord.
The thoughtful reminder of St. Augustine's blessed words helps put it all in perspective..."Our hearts are restless until they rest in Thee, O Lord"! May our hearts and our families truly rest in the Lord as we approach the holy season of Lent.
Thank you, dear women of God, for continually helping this soul, and so many others, stay focused on our calling to be the hearts of our families. This thread is a particular blessing during a season in my life that tends to tug my heart in far too many directions! My heart will be better rooted, wherever the Lord takes us, because I have been profoundly touched by all that is shared here!
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All for Christ, our Saviour and King, servant
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missionfamily
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Oh, sweet ladies, you have made my morning! I had a flurry of activity here yesterday as I tried to restore my home after a week of illness. We ran errands ALL DAY. I was too exhausted to even read here in the evening. This morning dawned with an early morning errand to run, a husband who felt bad all night trying to get out to work, and groceries still to be put away from a late evening shopping trip. I am just sitting still for the first time since I posed these questions, and reading your thoughts has given me such joy and peace!
I think it's interesting that so many of you pegged your prayer routine as the foremost way to set the tone for your family's life. Even if you were admitting that you need to work to get that routine back in order, you already have one thing right...it is the most important thing. I have noticed what a different wife and mother and Christian I am carving out quiet moments to create prayer rhythm in my life.
Jenn--Your image of the heart beating quietly, rhythmically, was so good. If I don't start my day there, it is nearly impossible to get it back. I have a good, easy-to-follow morning prayer routine right now. I have simplified the style and lowered my expectations a bit...and yet the grace flowing from it is more than I could have imagined!
My lenten focus is to carve out more quiet prayer spots like that in the day--for both myself and the rest of the family.
Another thing from Jenn that struck me about "noise" and creating quiet was the idea that our own expectations can sometimes be the noise that clamors out the quiet. That is HUGE for me. I learned when I was really being intentional about gentleness that I could only have a few priorities in each day to maintain that tone. I had sort of forgotten that and was wondering why I was wavering so quickly in that area--when I read that, I realized I was expecting too much of each day for that slow, rhythmic beating to be the tone...I was running us around like a heart racing.
So much to chew on here...I would love to share more, but I think it's best to take snippets at a time to think on.
How about adding any favorite quotes or Scripture passages that help you in this area, and then maybe we can compile them into a sticky note for our Lenten preparation?
Love you ladies, God bless you in your efforts at holiness and in your willingness to encourage others on their journeys.
__________________
Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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CrunchyMom
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ETA: I goofed and lost the first part of this post, but Thank you, Elizabeth for articulating exactly what I have been struggling with! Seeking understanding from others instead of from God (though, I suppose I can't deny the joy in having someone else articulate what I am feeling and know I am not alone in this struggle!)
Mackfam wrote:
I often think of how Our Lady did not need to speak or gush or even wonder aloud at the great mystery unfolding before her eyes...she pondered all these treasures, these mysteries in her heart. Isn't that powerful? I want to be like that. I want to consider thoughtfully, inwardly, in my heart. I want to take in every treasured moment and ponder it, turning it over and over again in my heart so that the movement of that thought changes me, softens me, and opens my heart even more to grace.
If I have been distracted, wrapped up in self, inattentive, pushing or demanding - they reflect all these back to me. My knee jerk reaction is to wonder what in the world is going on and start cracking the whip! But, grace provides an inward glance and I see the children are reflecting my lack of rhythm...my interior disquiet.
In closely following the rhythm of Holy Mother Church we are drawn into her mysteries and with quiet there is time for contemplation and meditation - even by the littlest. I have seen it. So, I see my role during Lent as one who guards quiet and carves out spaces so that there is opportunity for pondering. In order to set this tone, I must first be disposed to quiet myself.
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And thank you, Jenn, for giving practical steps in how to implement this.
What a beautiful question with so many thoughtful responses!
They remind me of this quote I took from Divine Intimacy yesterday and wrote a few times and typed to try and internalize it:
" And since nature opposes what is good, I promise to declare a merciless war against myself. My weapons for the battle will be prayer, the practice of the presence of God, and silence.
But, O my Love, You know that I am not skilled in handling these arms. Nevertheless, I will arm myself with sovereign confidence in You, with patience, humility, conformity to Your divine will, and supreme diligence.
But where shall I find the aid I need to fight against so many enemies in such continual battle? Ah! I know! You, my God, proclaim yourself my Captain, and raising the standard of Your Cross, you lovingly say, "Come, follow Me; do not fear."
--St. Theresa Margaret of the Heart of Jesus (as quoted in Divine Intimacy by Father Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalen, O.C.D.)
So far to go--so many attachments! And yet, this quote does seem to outline the "weapons" as those described by Jennifer and the "source of strength" as described by Elizabeth!
Thank you again! Much to ponder!
__________________
Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
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[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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Lisbet
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Okay, I just 'skimmed' this - I'm printing it out to read later, but I wanted to share a practical tip on this...
A consecrated RC woman once shared this with me (oh Pray for these women right now...) and it made so much sense. We teach our children to be quiet when we make a phone call - we may even retreat to another room to take a call. Why do we hesitate to take some time and teach them to be hush when mama is speaking with God? She suggested setting a timer for 10 minutes in the afternoon (I had morning prayer down at the time, and night prayers, but I was longing to spend time in conversation with God more throughout the day.) - start it off with a bell of some sort - just like the ringing of the phone and then proceed to pray, expecting the children to respect that time just as they would a phone call. Of course, just like a phone call if we are really needed we hang up and tend to business. But this really made sense to me. (and I'm so sorry if it's not making sense to anyone else, I am still in a post partum milk daze!)
__________________
Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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Servant2theKing
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Lisbet, your thoughts make perfect sense. Around here we refer to it as "monastic silence"...we've been practicing it long enough that all I have to do is declare a time of monastic silence and the children know to remain quiet. My great-grandmother used to tell her children and grandchildren "Hark" and all around her knew to hush and be silent! I once read of a protestant woman with many children who would cover her head with her apron as a sign to her children that she was spending time in silence or prayer. We used to call chapel veils or mantillas "whisper veils", while training our granddaughter to be quiet for Mass...maybe wearing one in the home during prayertimes would help foster a sense that times when mother is wearing her veil are meant for quiet time with the Lord. Just popping in for a few moments during our afternoon siesta...I was interrupted by a phone call and couldn't rest, so I came here :) I love this thread!
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missionfamily
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I am coming back to add some more thoughts to chew on because I'd like to continue this conversation...it has been fruitful for me to think on and pray on. Here are some thoughts from my morning reading in Imitation of Christ :
"Christ is ready to come to you, with what kindness in His glance! But you must make room, deep in your heart, to entertain Him as He deserves; it is for the inward eye, all the splendor and beauty of Him, deep in your heart is where He likes to be. Where he finds a man whose thoughts go deep, He is a frequent visitor, such pleasant converse, such welcome words of comfort, such deep repose, such intimate friendship, are well-nigh past belief.
Up with you the, faithful soul, get your heart ready for the coming of this True Lover, or He will never consent to come and make His dwelling with you..."
Wow...so how do we make our hearts places where Jesus is a frequent visitor...how, in the midst of our lifestyles, do we become women whose thoughts go deep? How can we get up and make our hearts ready for the coming of the True Lover during the Lenten season?
"If you love Jesus, if you love the truth, if you really direct your gaze inwards, and rid yourself of uncontrolled affections, then you can turn to God at will, lifted out of yourself by an impulse of the Spirit, and rest in Him contentedly...If there's order and discipline in your own soul, the doings of other people won't surprise you or put you out."
Hmmm....this makes all the concessions we lend ourselves because of little ones and husbands and the demands of our lives seem shallow, doesn't it. I don't think it means that those are not real obstacles to keeping the peace of recollection, but I do think it means we cannot use them as excuses not to strive for perfect recollection. And I do think it points out that the answer is not better-behaved children or a quieter house, but in the discipline in our own souls and in the depth of our love for Jesus.
So how can we focus our efforts this Lent to grow more deeply in love with Him? What are our uncontrolled affections that keep us from being able to turn to God at will? How can we lose these? How can we cultivate the discipline and order in our own souls that will keep us from unraveling regardless of the doingd of others?
__________________
Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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Willa
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Beautiful, Colleen!
I've been praying about how to put my own inner house in better order. I am hoping God will lead me. I agree, it starts with us -- not, at least right away, with ordering our outside environment.
I was cleaning up this morning and noticed that someone had left an empty granola bar wrapper on the floor. It made me angry. I realized then that in order to increase my inner order and therefore my effectiveness in dealing with these things -- I had to get "detached" in a way from the outcome of a tidy house and well-trained children. That doesn't mean I give up, quite the opposite -- it means that if I am truly working with a gentle spirit that wants what is best, I won't react out of anger or disappointment.
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Willa
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Mackfam
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I had some other thoughts as well along the lines of seeking to enthrone Our Lord in our Hearts this Lenten season...the imagery of the Heart is so very powerful...
Psalm 119:10
Quote:
| With my whole heart I seek thee... |
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and...
St. John Bosco writes from the "Forty Dreams of St. John Bosco":
Quote:
| "Courage, let us work wholeheartedly for (our children) youth. Let us do all we can for God's glory and the welfare of souls. (Again the welfare of our children's souls.) Up there a great reward awaits us, the same as promised to Abraham: 'I am ... your reward exceeding great.' (Gen. 15:1) At times we may feel tired, exhausted or overwhelmed by ailments, but we must take heart, because up there we shall rest forever." |
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I found so much to meditate on and inspire me in St. John Bosco's words - Let us work wholeheartedly.
I'll come back with more thoughts later in the day...
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Angie Mc
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Thank you, Colleen. I hope and pray to serve my God and family best by seeing my interior life as a mysterious cooperation between my soul, body, thoughts, feelings, prayer, and grace (I'm sure there is much more but I'm still piecing this puzzle together for sure!) Like others have said better than I can say, I echo that when my interior life, my heart, is in order then the outside world has less impact on my family. As my dh carries the weight of the world on his shoulders and protects us to the best of his ability, I am charged with saying "Yes" to this protection.
It's been about a year since I began giving my primary attention to issues concerning my interior life...my soul, body, thoughts, feelings, and prayer. God is so good and grace has flowed into our family in a most beautiful and tender way. This has more than made up for the suffering this entails (longanimity.) It hurts to make changes in how I treat my body, how I think, how I feel, and how I pray. It hurts to be misunderstood - to be considered selfish, arrogant, elitist, stupid, and worse. Yet, I must be steadfast in my priorities to love God first and to fulfill my vocation in as joyful and loving manner as possible, So I admit defeat! Not only can I not please everyone...I no longer want to (this is most certainly a grace from God.) If I can pray before my God at the end of the day and stand before my dh and children and know that I have done right by them, that is what motivates me to wake up and do it again tomorrow.
Love,
__________________
Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Feb 18 2009 at 10:25pm | IP Logged
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I have been thinking about your observations, Colleen. And, in particular thinking of how important it is that our affections are ordered properly so that our heart is available for Our Lord to occupy a place deep in our hearts.
My affections were not always ordered in this way. I believed my children to be absolutely and completely mine. I possessed them so tightly in my heart. I possessed everyone that I loved so tightly. How prideful of me! It was a fearful and vulnerable love - not the kind of love that makes you free. Then God, in His mercy, drew me very close to the Cross and asked me to give one of my children back to Him. He asked in the way a Father does when He knows the answer, and He knows you know the answer, but He wants to give you the opportunity, the time to offer yourself. It was so very painful, and it stripped me completely. It turned everything I thought I knew and felt about my children and my husband completely upside down and dipped it in grace. I can't describe it any other way. But, ever after, my affections, my heart has been His.
I learned that an unhealthy attitude of "possession" of a child or a husband, one that is not ordered rightly, will lead ultimately to one's end. It breeds insecurity, vulnerability, lack of trust, fear, and it suffocates grace. As it relates to your reflections in "Imitation of Christ," it fills your heart and your every thought with nothing but anticipating the unthinkable and leaves no room for adoration or surrender or just being present to God. In short, there is no room there for Him to be, much less for Him to be pondered and considered deep in your heart.
As the heart of my home, I do love my husband and my children deeply...enough to give my life for them in an instant. But, I do not possess them. They each belong to God. How much more comforting is that! How much joy there is in living that! In surrendering to that truth, I removed all of the variables I never had any hope of controlling and simply tried to love them as He loves them. I surrendered all of the "what if's" to Him.
God is ordered. Look at the beauty and order in the Creation account. It's such a simplification to say God first, husband second, etc., but it is true. When we have enthroned Our Lord in our hearts, they are animated by Him and we are able to love more and see more as He loves. We see Christ in the man we married, and Christ in our 4 yo. And, we can see our crosses as a path to holiness.
If my affections are ordered, it means that I am able to trust that holiness for me is found in and through my vocation as wife to *this* husband, and mother to *these* children, as the heart of *this* home. My job is to steward all of these precious gifts and serve gently and with joy. Serving with joy and with a Marian gentleness allows for contemplation of every action of mine as an act of love for Him. In this way, I try to draw closer.
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Mackfam
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I hit post last night because I was tired, but I wanted to follow up this morning with another thinking out loud list to help me question how I'm ordering my affections:
Where is my heart?
**Is prayer and communication with God nurtured on a regular basis in my day?
**Am I aware of the supernatural veiled in the ordinary parts of my day?
**Do I try to see with the eyes of faith the supernatural goodness, beauty, and lessons God has waiting for me in cleaning the toilet? in feeding the family? in instructing the children? in offering myself in gentle manner to my family?
**Do I seek His will in all things?
**Do I throw a spiritual fit when God asks me to let go of an unhealthy attachment - whether to a person or a material possession?
**Do I make sincere and realistic efforts to bring the Little Children to Him?
**Am I trying to unite our domestic church to the Universal Church through prayer and other seasonal celebrations?
My heart in my vocation
**Is my interior spirit one of softness, yielding and approachability with my husband, or do his concerns and suggestions to me get brushed aside as I hurry through my day?
**Do I take time or carve out special time to be with my husband on a regular basis?
**Do I seek his counsel on matters of myself and our family before I take my concerns to other friends?
**Do I pray for my husband on a regular basis?
**Do my husband and I pray to know God's will in all the areas that affect our family?
**There is a temptation to dump all our worries and complaints on our best friend - our husband. Do I do this, or do I try to shoulder my share of the load with as little complaint as possible?
**Do I question and nag my husband in order to get my way, or do I wait until a quiet time to make a request known?
**Am I clinging so tightly to the idea of my children that I am fearful?
**Is my attitude toward my children one of possession or beautiful gift to be cherished?
**Do I forget to enjoy the gift of time with my children when I am too busy or wrapped up in the daily duty?
**Do I pray daily for my children?
**Do I respect the individual needs of each child as a child of God?
**Am I suffocating a child's spirit out of protection?
My heart in outside apostolates, friends, clubs, organizations
**Am I maintaining the daily duties in my home before I give my time and myself to these worthy apostolates?
**Do I involve myself, but only to the degree that I can still maintain my domestic church?
My heart in my home
**Is my home ordered in a way that is pleasing to my husband and children?
**Is my home ordered in a way that it assists in the running of the home?
**Am I clinging to too much stuff in our home?
**Is the stuff being used by our family, or is it useful in our domestic church? Think of the manna God sent from heaven. The Israelites were allowed to keep only what they could use for the day - their daily bread. Am I using what God has sent for the day or season of life and then passing along the extra to other families? Am I a good steward of the material gifts God enables our family to have?
**Do the material things in my home give glory to God in their simplicity and beauty? Do they reveal the splendor in the ordinary?
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This was so helpful for me to think out loud like this, and I can see several areas here that I really need to work on during Lent to order my affections and provide the interior quiet so that I can contemplate and lift my heart to Him at any time!! This whole thread has been so helpful for me!
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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missionfamily
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Oh, Jenn, I have so little time to respond over the next few days and so much to say! I will be using your "thinking out loud" list as my Lenten examination of conscience...maybe I can get back here this evening.
If not, know that I will be pondering all your thoughts in my heart. I do hope more of you will share your responses. So much fruit to be gleaned here.
__________________
Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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Meredith
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My you ladies have been very busy here, so much good food for thought indeed!
Thank you for all your time spent thinking "out Loud" it is so helpful to so many! I hope to contemplate these ideas more too!
Many blessings,
__________________
Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
Sweetness and Light
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Becky Le
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I'm so glad this was brought up in a recent thread. I must have missed it the first time around and now I feel so blessed to have found it! I will also be printing it out and using it as an examination of conscience. Thank you so much!
__________________
Becky, loving wife to Chris and mom to Stephen (11/99), Elizabeth (04/01), Catherine (08/04), Natalie & Samantha (10/07)
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Hearts of our Homes-MORE FOOD FOR THOUGHT
