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julia s.
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Posted: Aug 15 2006 at 10:26am | IP Logged Quote julia s.

My son is nine years old and he still has trouble staying dry at night and in the day. At this point I don't know if I'm missing something. He seems to put out a lot of urine. More than I thought any one could put out. He's done this since he was young. Like he could pee a lot and then a half hour later he'd still have a ton of pee again. He says he can't feel it when it's coming. My husband has gone over all the physical cues with him, but I'm not sure he's getting it.
Now my son does have some mild sensory integration issues and he may be on the edge of the Asperger's, but it would be the far edge close to normal (I've never had him tested or anything it's just our observations). He doesn't always miss going to the bathroom, but he misses several times a week.
I'm just out of ideas, and his pediatricians don't seem to think this is anything, but a developmental issue (which it might be) I just don't want to miss something like a physical problem (i.e. kidneys).
If anyone has any experience with this I'd love to hear from you.


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Posted: Aug 15 2006 at 4:01pm | IP Logged Quote Erin

My friend's boys are only just now dry. Her oldest was ten before he stopped wetting the bed at night. Apparently her dh was twelve! Not much reassurance I know but I just wanted you to know that you're not alone



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Posted: Aug 15 2006 at 5:19pm | IP Logged Quote mom2mpr

My ds, 8 1/2, has never been dry at night. All family doc's(in the 2 states we have lived in so far) have mentioned things we can do(DDAVP-a nasal spray, alarms, etc.) but most have been very conservative and said he will probably outgrow it.
He also has what I called a "squirt" problem during the day. I notice when I do laundry. It seems to be resolving as he ages. I noticed it gets worse when he is really tired. He MAY have sensory integration issues but has never been officially diagnosed--just a Mom's thoughts she never followed up with.
I don't have the "put out a lot of urine" issue. That could be due to other causes and to make myself feel better I would probably look into that. If that work up was negative then development and waiting would be my plan.
Hope that helps and good luck.   
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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 10:51am | IP Logged Quote Dawnie

Julia,

Have you spoken w/ your pediatrician about diabetes? I think that very frequent urination is a symptom...

FWIW, I had night-wetting problems until I was almost 12yo. I just slept so deeply that I didn't wake up. I also had accidents occassionally during waking hours, although I don't remember when I stopped having those. Very embarrassing.    I was always SO ashamed when I wet the bed or had an accident, but it was really totally out of my control.

Here is what helped me...my mom taught me how to do Kegal exercises...this REALLY helped to improve my bladder control. I don't know if you could do this with a boy, but I wonder if having him practice stopping and starting the flow of urine while he's using the bathroom would help?

Also, I seemed to have more accidents if I drank soft drinks in the evening. Like if we went to a party or something and I had a pop, I almost always wet the bed.

I've heard that boys tend to have more of a problem w/ night-wetting than girls do, so hopefully it's just a developmental thing he will grow out of soon. I was SO glad when I finally stopped wetting the bed and could wake up and go to the bathroom.

I'm sure this is frustrating for you, too...more laundry. ugh.

I hope that helps...

Dawn

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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 11:02am | IP Logged Quote Rebecca

I have a family member who is now grown who wet the bed until she was almost an adult. They tried many, many things but had no positive results. I felt bad for her because she still had to wear those pullup disposable diapers as a teenager. Finally, she read somewhere that a calcium/magnesium supplement would help. She did get some relief from that and eventually stopped wetting at night.

That also might explain the pop thing Dawn, as carbonation in pop (soda for all you East Coasters !)leaches calcium from the bones, thus causing a deficiency.

My second son used to wet the bed so often. It was very discouraging for him and a lot of work for mom! My heart goes out to you, Julia.
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julia s.
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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 11:13am | IP Logged Quote julia s.

Thank you everyone for your help.
I've kind of guessed we just have to wait it out. But it had been awhile since I revisited the whole --is there anything we can to to help him-- question I thought it worth putting out there as a question. I've thought of diabetes since it runs in my husband's family. And I think it would be worth checking up on.

Dawn,
Thanks so much for sharing. I feel for your younger self having to watch my son who is so embarrassed every time he has to tell us his sheets are wet. He won't wear the underwear for keeping dry -- besides being uncomfortable I think it's too much like wearing a diaper and he finds that too embarrassing (eventhough I've assured him no one will know but us). I'm pursuing it again since I think now as he gets older having wet sheets is bothering him more. It's a balancing act and I feel so bad for him and I wish I could wave a wand and make it go away.
I think I'll have him try the exercises you suggested. It's worth a try. I have a feeling it's just a waiting game.
One thing I noticed is that it has gotten worse recently and he is going through a growth spurt (he just in formed me yesterday that he out grew his shoes we bought him 6 weeks ago ). He's always had a worse time with it then -- I forgot since he hadn't had a growth spurt in a while. Which may explain why kids outgrow it in adolescence.

Well thanks for everyone's kind response.


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julia s.
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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 11:19am | IP Logged Quote julia s.

Hi Rebecca,
I guess we're on at the same time .
That is interesting about the calcium/magnesium thing because I have problems with my intestine if I'm low on calcium/magnesium. Something I'll try. He has been cutting back on his dairy lately. Maybe a supplement would help. Thanks.


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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 12:13pm | IP Logged Quote mom2mpr

Julia,
To help ds handle it would it make sense to have him take care of his bed? Not in a punishing way, just to have him responsible and maybe decrease some of his embarrasment at having you deal with it? Stock up on sheets in his room and let him change the bed.
Reinforce all of us are different and mature at different times. There is a book out there, sorry I am not aware of the title, I think it is put out by the AAP(American Academy of Pediatrics), regarding this issue for kids. You might want to look into that.
Keep reassuring him he is not alone--he really isn't--I find it very common in boys. For some reason my ds isn't phased by it too much, yet-thank goodness.
Also, in reading I have done in the past I remember dairy being an issue with bedwetting. Let me know how that goes. My ds was allergic to milk protein til about 3 and I have been thinking of trying to eliminate dairy for the wetting reason but can't get it together after dealing with it for so long when he was little.
And please do check with your doctor about diabetes and other causes for high urine output.   
Hang in there!
Anne   
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julia s.
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Posted: Aug 16 2006 at 9:22pm | IP Logged Quote julia s.

mom2mpr wrote:
Julia,
To help ds handle it would it make sense to have him take care of his bed? Not in a punishing way, just to have him responsible and maybe decrease some of his embarrasment at having you deal with it? Stock up on sheets in his room and let him change the bed.
Reinforce all of us are different and mature at different times. There is a book out there, sorry I am not aware of the title, I think it is put out by the AAP(American Academy of Pediatrics), regarding this issue for kids. You might want to look into that.
Keep reassuring him he is not alone--he really isn't--I find it very common in boys. For some reason my ds isn't phased by it too much, yet-thank goodness.
Also, in reading I have done in the past I remember dairy being an issue with bedwetting. Let me know how that goes. My ds was allergic to milk protein til about 3 and I have been thinking of trying to eliminate dairy for the wetting reason but can't get it together after dealing with it for so long when he was little.
And please do check with your doctor about diabetes and other causes for high urine output.   
Hang in there!
Anne   


Well the bed thing is kind of funny because he is in the top bunk of a bunkbed. Yep, you read that right. My husband and I didn't have the heart to tell him he couldn't have, what by rights was his because of age and maturity, because he had a wetting problem. At the time it solved a space problem and my son was doing better at night (maybe only twice a month). He'd still only make it half way to the bathroom (or just out of the bed ), but at least most of the time the bedding was spared . He's only recently gotten so we have to get him up twice a night in order to prevent accidents. He is still better than he used to be when he was younger, so in some ways he's much easier. It's just his self-esteeme I'm worried about.

Anne, if you find this book let me know.

Actually when he first started peeing I thought it was dairy related, but I couldn't quite get a link (it was just mother's intuition/paranoia) and I didn't get a whole lot of support with this theory.


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Posted: Aug 17 2006 at 7:12am | IP Logged Quote mom2mpr

julia s. wrote:
[QUOTE=mom2mpr]
Well the bed thing is kind of funny because he is in the top bunk of a bunkbed. Yep, you read that right. My husband and I didn't have the heart to tell him he couldn't have, what by rights was his because of age and maturity, because he had a wetting problem. At the time it solved a space problem and my son was doing better at night (maybe only twice a month). He'd still only make it half way to the bathroom (or just out of the bed ), but at least most of the time the bedding was spared . He's only recently gotten so we have to get him up twice a night in order to prevent accidents. He is still better than he used to be when he was younger, so in some ways he's much easier. It's just his self-esteeme I'm worried about.

Anne, if you find this book let me know.


The book is titled "Waking Up Dry" by Howard Bennett. Sorry I don't know how to make those nice click on these words links but it is on Amazon(what isn't ) The author is a doctor and it sounds cute with Bladder Man a cartoon superhero. I read an interview with the doc in a newspaper and he does a lot of work with kids that have this problem. I won't approach my ds with it, yet, because I don't want to make a big deal of it, since he is so low key about it so far. I remember the author doing a lot of teaching about the bladder and how it works, maybe even exercises(Kegals? as someone else mentioned), and reassuring them.
You know, when I wrote about the bed I had this inkling he was in the top bunk of a bunkbed    My ds has a loft--they are a pain to change. I would, going back many years to my nursing home aide days, make the bed many times with waterproof sheets. Layer it, from the bottom up, waterproof, regular, waterproof, regular....maybe 3 times. Viola,just tear off the first layer and nice dry comfy bed til am
Ah, wetting 2 nights a month? How wonderful! Never been there
Hope that helps and good luck!
Anne
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Posted: Aug 17 2006 at 7:19am | IP Logged Quote Elizabeth

We had a wet bed problem that lasted into the early teens. Bells and whistles didn't work. DDAVP ins't a vaible longterm solution and it's outrageously expensive. The problem was entirely solved this summer (we've had three dry months) when we un-bunked the beds. My theory is that he'd awaken, ever so slightly, but that he couldn't rouse himself enough to climb down. When we unbunked the bed, he managed to awaken enough to get to the bathroom.

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Karen T
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Posted: Aug 17 2006 at 11:18pm | IP Logged Quote Karen T

Funny to come across this topic. With both of my boys, they were potty trained at night long before daytime training - they just always woke up dry and never had any problems. With dd, she was daytime trained very early (about 16 mos, mostly due to seeing older brother training at same time probably) but still at age 5 (next mo) she's wet every night. she's been wearing pullups so I didn't worry about it much, but lately she's been wetting through them, too. The other night I went to bed about 2 hours after she did, and her pullup was bulging so much I changed it (she barely woke up but didn't recall it in the am), and then in the am she'd still wet through the new one! she had not had anything to drink since supper (milk) about 2 hrs before bedtime. I just don't know how she can produce so much urine! she was a heavy wetter as a baby, too, but nursed very frequently. She did have a dairy allergy early on, but outgrew it (intestinal symptoms) at about a year. wonder if that could be part of it?
She goes to the ped. next month for her annual checkup but in the past the dr. has been completely unconcerned about the bedwetting (as others have mentioned, it's not uncommon much older).
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