| Author | |
NMMountainMom
Forum Newbie
Joined: July 05 2010
Location: New Mexico
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 43
|
| Posted: July 05 2010 at 1:26pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
Hello ladies,
This is my first post after introducing myself and I feel a little badly that this particular subject is my first post... but I wonder if there are any moms here for whom homeschooling is actually their 2nd choice? If I could choose, given my life's circumstances, I would prefer to have a good Catholic school to send my kids to. I help my husband run our business and I find doing that combined with raising an expanding family AND homeschooling to be overwhelming. I love homeschooling and it would be my FIRST choice if I didn't have to help run our business. Giving up my business role is not an option as that is what puts food on our table. My husband is not a business man and I do have business skills, so I have to run it while my husband goes out and does the actual technical work.
I wasn't sure where to post this, but this seemed the appropriate place because I feel like actually managing this monumental feat comes down to excellent organization. And I am not a naturally organized person (I am more of the disorganized creative type)! I My children are 13 (he is in public school), 7, 5, 3 and 3 months. I am formally homeschooling the 7 year old and the 5 & 3 year old learn from what their older brother is doing.
Can you offer tips for managing so much and getting it all done? I also need encouragement- this seems so hard. I would like to enjoy it more.
Danielle
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: July 05 2010 at 5:51pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Hi Danielle, and welcome to 4Real.
You are not alone. While I love the privilege of watching my children make connections and love learning, it's a big responsibility and time commitment.
There isn't an ideal situation, there is always tradeoffs in homeschooling and tradeoffs in sending your child to school.
And I admit there are times I wish I had another option for a good Catholic school so I didn't have the responsibility.
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
leanne maree
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 25 2008
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 508
|
| Posted: July 05 2010 at 7:11pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
We run a business from home as well, and as much as I would like to give it so much more priority my dd schooling comes first.
There are times where I spend many hours on the business and leave dd to her schooling, this is ok now she is 12, but warlier on this was a struggle- she needed my input much more intensely.
I suppose I have no tips to offer just empathy, that you are not alone.
I LOVE homeschooling and we wouldn't like the alternative, but it can be a juggle,
leanne 
__________________
God is Love
Leanne
Loving wife to Dermot and Adoring mother to Louise, Kristie, Kieran & Brid
http://leannemaree.blogspot.com/
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
allegiance_mom
Forum Pro
Joined: June 26 2007
Location: New York
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 163
|
| Posted: July 05 2010 at 9:31pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Homeschooling is our first choice, but I can understand trying to manage it all!
I, too, have a lot on my plate. I help my husband run his business (accounting, taxes, banking, typing estimates and invoices). I also work part-time during tax season preparing income taxes for a local firm. I sell used things (mostly books) on the internet. I have just taken on a job managing my bachelor brother-in-law's personal finances (he just took a job which will take him out of the country frequently and for long periods of time). Whew!
Homeschooling is a top priority, and my soon-to-be-six-year-old needs his mommy to do school. We do that first thing in the morning, and everything else I get in on breaks and in the afternoons and Saturdays.
Things are not always done around the house, and everything is not always neat and tidy. It helps to have a plan, at least for me. I've read FlyLady's web site and Mother's Rule of Life and other organizational books. I don't use any one system exclusively, but have developed (rather, am developing - it's always evolving) my own set of routines and time frames for a typical weekday.
My problem is sticking with them. It is easy for me to get behind in the morning by oversleeping and / or lingering over my coffee trying to wake up! The sooner I get moving around, the better the day goes. Oh, and emptying the dishwasher in the early morning has positive ramifications on our day, even beyond the kitchen. I can't fully explain it, but if the dishwasher isn't emptied, dishes pile up and then the whole day seems to go south.
__________________
Allegiance Mom in NY
Wife 17 years
Mom to two boys, 14 and 8, and one pre-born babe in Heaven (Jan 2010)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Kathryn
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2009
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1520
|
| Posted: July 05 2010 at 9:40pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I guess you could say homeschooling is my 2nd choice too. We had a wonderful, very small Catholic school my oldest DD attended for 2 yrs but they closed their doors b/c of finances. Then, I enrolled her and her brother in the local parish school which is signficantly bigger and not equipped (in my opinion) to offer the kind of one-on-one attention I think they need esp. for my son. Soo, after 2 yrs at this school, we're homeschooling. This past year was my 1st year and it has been quite a challenge and we're welcoming another baby in early Oct so I'm starting to feel quite anxious about it all.
Again, sorry I don't have advice but know you're not alone. I do find the earlier I rise, the more happens. And making "to-do" lists and **TRYING** to enforce help from everyone although this is proving very difficult right now.
__________________
Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Becky Parker
Forum All-Star
Joined: May 23 2005
Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2582
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 6:17am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Danielle,
I would say pray, pray, pray. God knows your heart and that of your children. I have a very close friend whose situation is a bit different but you might be able to relate.
When the small Catholic school we were both sending our children to closed, we started homeschooling and they enrolled their kids in the public school. One year later they decided to homeschool. The problem was that my friend worked full time as a nurse, and her dh also worked full time. But, her income was required as well. So she really struggled with homeschooling 4 kids and working full time the first year. She prayed and prayed, feeling like homeschooling was what God wanted for their family, but not knowing how to make it work better since she was always so exhausted.
Finally, after all this prayer, something changed for her husband's job which allowed her to go part time.
She is still a nurse, but she now only works every other weekend, the night shift. I think those weekends are still a bit difficult but the homeschooling is going so much better.
So, long story short, keep praying. God has an answer! It might just be different than what you think!
__________________
Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Servant2theKing
Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 13 2005
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1505
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 10:25am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Danielle, prayer is such an essential element for all of us in discerning God's holy will for raising and educating our children. While the details of each of our homeschooling journeys may differ from yours, our paths are always made more clear when we truly seek to know God's holy will for our family and children. May the Lord guide your family in whatever is truly best for your family.
On a practical note, is it possible for you to perform the business portion of your tasks in blocks of time when your dc are sleeping or when dh is home? Sometimes those with home or family businesses struggle with balancing both work and family life...designating blocks of time which are strictly devoted to one or the other might be helpful. Praying for all your needs and intentions, that God's wisdom and grace will be a beacon in your life.
__________________
All for Christ, our Saviour and King, servant
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Angie Mc
Board Moderator
Joined: Jan 31 2005
Location: Arizona
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 11400
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 2:03pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Danielle, welcome! I mainly want to tell you that no, you are not alone in homeschooling being your second choice. Members here home educate for a variety of reasons and under a variety of circumstances. I can tell you that although home educating is my first choice now, it wasn't when my first child was little. I had never even heard of home education. Once I learned about it, I surely thought it wasn't for me. Once I realized that I *would* home educate, I wasn't initially giddy about the whole thing  .
So, you are among friends  . I pray that we can be a support to you, share good information, and encourage you where you are.
If you don't mind, I'm going to update your topic to include "work-at-home", to draw as many members with this experience to contribute.
Love,
__________________
Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
About Me
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Teachin'Mine2
Forum Pro
Joined: Jan 22 2010
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 242
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 3:24pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Welcome Danielle!
I agree with what's been said about prayer being so important. Also, share your struggles with your husband and ask him if there's ways he can help out.
Maybe changing your schooling schedule a bit would work better. Maybe you need to concentrate more on running the business and home duties during the day, and can spend some time doing formal schooling in the evenings. Maybe your husband would be able to help out also - reading to the younger ones, or watching the baby so you can have some uninterrupted teaching time.
During the day when you're running the business, they can do reading on their own, play, do workbooks on their own, etc.. Just a thought.
How is your 13 yo doing at public school? I know it might seem like it would be more work to teach him too, but he might actually be a big help in teaching the little ones too. But by high school, his work would increase enough that it would probably limit the amount of time he'd have available to help.
Another idea is to change your business hours - if you're able. Maybe have everyone up early, and begin school at 7AM and work until 9AM and then switch to taking care of the business. Those two hours might be all you need for formal instruction - even an hour and a half might do at that age.
__________________
mom of one 13yo dd
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SuzanneG
Forum Moderator
Joined: June 17 2006
Location: Idaho
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5465
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 3:49pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Your children that are home are still pretty young, but they won't always be  .
As they get older they'll be able to help you with the business....routine, mundane taskes, organizing, sorting, phone calls, etc. As they get older....it's a great opportunity to learn about running a business, getting them involved is SO MUCH MORE "useful" than "seatwork" in many cases.
In the meantime......focusing the next year or so on teaching them chores and basic household tasks will go a LONG way! My 7 yo cleans up after b-fast and makes lunch a few times a week, along with her other daily hores. Things like this will be a huge help in decreasing your overwhelmed feeling.
One of my best friends and her husband run a pub/tavern and it takes BOTH of them to keep that place going. It's in a very small town and they have a hard time finding good help. So, they do it all. They have a 7, 4, and newborn....and she has many of the doubts you have. She has not spent much time "schooling" the oldest. But, he has taught himself to read, and she has provided lots of good toys and independent activities and structure for him.
Although she's starting to see the fruits of this "lack of schooling".....and having her 7 yo be with her or her hd during all of their "work".....
:: He knows all about kitchen machinery, how it works, wattage, and safety considerations.
:: He works with the cash register and has learned all about money and place value!
:: He understands volume and can multiply recipes to make double/triple/or whatever MORE of something in the kitchen.
:: He's learned how to write by making shopping lists and take orders from people and taking messages on the phone.
:: When they are making purchasing decisions, he creates a chart and writes down the features of each item for consideration.
:: He understands "inventory" and systems of distribution via the delivery guys!
It's so WONDERFUL and more than any at-home-seat-work could provide!
Now, I know not ALL small businesses are alike and have the same set up and are as conducive to kids "being there" as a restaurant situation....but there is always SOMETHING! Whether it's the technical, business, or maintenance/organizational side of the business.......think of it as a learning opportunity for your kids as they get older! At some point, maybe it won't be "just you and your dh" running the business...maybe it'll be a family affair! And, what a GREAT education your kids will have!
We are all put in certain situations to do God's will. You are following God's will be helping your husband in his business! As a result, your children's education will probably look a lot different than a family who has a mom who stays home full time, and that's FINE! And, even if it's not your "first choice"...that's fine too! But, that doesn't mean that you can't give your kids a GREAT education too!!!!! Because you CAN! It will just be different!
__________________
Suzanne in ID
Wife to Pete
Mom of 7 (Girls - 14, 12, 11, 9, 7 and Boys - 4, 1)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SuzanneG
Forum Moderator
Joined: June 17 2006
Location: Idaho
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5465
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 3:51pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
The friend I spoke about above also said that over the past 1/2 year or so, she read a couple of "unschooling books" and it REALLY REALLY made her feel better about their lifestyle and gave her a bit more confidence and lots of ideas to ponder about how to provide a good education in their situation.
__________________
Suzanne in ID
Wife to Pete
Mom of 7 (Girls - 14, 12, 11, 9, 7 and Boys - 4, 1)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
NMMountainMom
Forum Newbie
Joined: July 05 2010
Location: New Mexico
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 43
|
| Posted: July 06 2010 at 5:47pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thank you so much for all of your replies! You have given me alot to think about. First and foremost, I am not praying about this like I should be. I have a family member in crises right now and I am spending a great deal of time praying for her, but I'm neglecting lifting up my own burdens to the Lord.
My husband isn't really in any position to help right now. He works some days as long as 15 hours. This is our busy season right now. That is part of the reason I feel so burdened. The winter will be slower for us, though. Maybe I should just be thankful we have work when so many people cannot find jobs right now. The boys can play outside alot right now, so maybe I should just put my nose to the grindstone with work and just make sure the kids are fed, relatively clean, and have books and crafts available to them when they are inside. On top of it being our busy season, I am behind on accounting work (my least favorite and arguably most important task) after having our baby, now 3 months old.
I might be getting ahead of myself, too. I'm thinking about the upcoming "school year", ordering materials, etc. and I'm not sure what I want to do with the boys this year. I feel like the 7 year old needs some structured school time, but I am comfortable going with the flow for the 5 & 3 year old. I am thinking about all kinds of things... online school, a more structured curriculum like MODG or CHC, or just going with lots of living books and working on the three Rs. The idea of workboxes which I have just stumbled into on this board has piqued my interest. I liked the suggestion about having the 13 year old help with teaching his brothers, and I would dearly love to pull him out of public school, but for a long list of reasons I won't go into here, I can't.
Before I had the baby, I had a very good routine going with work, school and chores. My boys do help out alot around the house. I had implemented "A Mother's Rule of Life" and it helped immensely. I need to get back on the bandwagon again, but routines need to be different (and more flexible) with a young baby. I need to work those out and I'm not sure how my day should look anymore.
Anyway, thank you for your replies and keep your thoughts coming!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Planning and Ordering our Days
Topic: work-at-home + Homeschooling 2nd Choice
