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SeaStar
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| Posted: Aug 07 2013 at 4:50pm | IP Logged
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Can anyone help me out...
We have been invited to a Bat Mitzvah. What would be an appropriate gift?
I know that a cash gift is always appropriate, but if I wanted to give a more personal gift, what would that be?
This friend is a very sweet girl and a good friend of my dc, but I don't feel I can approach the mom with this question.
Ideas?
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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4 lads mom
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| Posted: Aug 07 2013 at 7:53pm | IP Logged
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My first stop would be “Google”  [;) I would love to know what you end up getting....we haven’t had the opportunity to be friends with any Jewish families, I find their culture fascinating. My only other guess would be a very pretty journal with a pretty pen set. How can you ever have too many pretty journals?? If your dc are inclined, they could even make a book to use as a journal, with watercolors, etc. If you again...google (great new verb)....”how to make an art journal” that might give you some ideas.
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Aug 08 2013 at 5:32am | IP Logged
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Ah- I did Google, which left me with more questions.
From what I read, I get the feeling that money is not really considered an appropriate gift for this occasion after all. Jewelry yes, and other things like Shabbat candle holders, etc.
I just don't feel very qualified to pick out Jewish religious items with confidence. For her FHC, my dd received a set of Dr. Suess books in Spanish as a gift.  The gift was well meant, of course, but, oh boy- I don't want to unwittingly repeat that.
A pretty journal does sound like a nice idea. 
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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Mary K
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| Posted: Aug 08 2013 at 6:17am | IP Logged
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is there a shop that specializes in jewish reigious items? her rabbi may have some ideas.
mary-ny
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 08 2013 at 11:52am | IP Logged
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what about a nice chain necklace? You said jewelry was appropriate and I know that often a nice pendant comes on a cheap chain.. so it would be nice by itself, or if another chain with a pendant broke etc.
I wish it was a bit later in the year. My only contact these days is through the cub scouts and I've been able to ask her quite a few "how do you?" type of questions that the scout masters all felt odd asking her. So in another month I would have been able to ask but not right now.
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Aug 08 2013 at 3:41pm | IP Logged
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I"ve asked around here- not many people have ideas for me. It would great to have your "source", Jodie.
From my reading today, I gather that adults giving gifts tend to give money for a Bat Mitzvah, in increments of 18. $36 is the average starting amount.
Kids more often give other kids a gift- and the opinions range wildly as to what is appropriate. Some of the suggestions I found are decidedly nonreligious (such as itunes gift card). Others say the gift should be meaningful and long lasting, but that the parents and relatives should be the ones buying gifts related directly to the Jewish faith (items used in prayers or ceremonies, for example).
So, I can't say that I feel anymore enlightened.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 10 2013 at 9:57pm | IP Logged
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Oh my goodness.. can you guess who I ran into yesterday evening when I was picking up kids from the swimming pool (closed due to approaching thunder storm so we were all there about the same time picking up kids)?
The one and only Jewish lady I know. So of course given the opportunity and that the storm was going across south of us rather than coming over the top. I hopped out of the van and went over and told her about this questions and asked if she had any suggestions.
She said of the ones she's been to (she might be a convert), that the child in question has been doing a type of service project (similiar to doing an Eagle project for scouts or senior project in high school). So that there was often a way to donate to the continuing project.. like if the beneficiary was an animal shelter than they were accepting donation for the shelter either in money or items like dog biscuits and such. So she said you might see if there's something like that going on. But that otherwise, education is highly valued (art and music mentioned specially) so that anything along that line would probably be well recieved.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Aug 13 2013 at 11:25am | IP Logged
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JodieLyn wrote:
Oh my goodness.. can you guess who I ran into yesterday evening when I was picking up kids from the swimming pool (closed due to approaching thunder storm so we were all there about the same time picking up kids)?
The one and only Jewish lady I know. So of course given the opportunity and that the storm was going across south of us rather than coming over the top. I hopped out of the van and went over and told her about this questions and asked if she had any suggestions.
She said of the ones she's been to (she might be a convert), that the child in question has been doing a type of service project (similiar to doing an Eagle project for scouts or senior project in high school). So that there was often a way to donate to the continuing project.. like if the beneficiary was an animal shelter than they were accepting donation for the shelter either in money or items like dog biscuits and such. So she said you might see if there's something like that going on. But that otherwise, education is highly valued (art and music mentioned specially) so that anything along that line would probably be well recieved. |
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Thanks, Jodie! That is good information to tuck away for future reference.
I did wind up ordering a very pretty pendant bookmark from Etsy. The charm on the end says, "be yourself", which I think is a good sentiment for a teenager. I paired that with a pretty journal.
I just felt hopeless about ordering jewelry with any type of Jewish theme, and I wanted something more personal than money. But the brother will be coming up next for his bar mitzvah, so I will be prepared!
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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Topic: Gift for Bat Mitzvah?
