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JodieLyn
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Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Aug 25 2009 at 11:39pm | IP Logged
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I just found out that one of the families at our church lost their oldest child. I know the mother and the younger brother some but the young lady not at all, not even sure I could recognize her off hand. The mother taught a ccd class with her son in it, and one of my kids was in it as well. And I say hi and chat at church but she isn't what I would necessarily call a friend.
But there was a car accident and the girl didn't survive.. what do you do? a card? I just don't know 
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 25 2009 at 11:55pm | IP Logged
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Oh we will likely attend the funeral if it's an option. DH says he knows the dad pretty well through work and he wants to do that. I may see if they want someone to help with singing. We wouldn't take the kids (except maybe dd12, if she knew the girl and wants to go.. I'm not sure, I'm always finding out that she has chatted and made "friends" with the older kids/adults after mass)
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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jdostalik
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| Posted: Aug 26 2009 at 12:24am | IP Logged
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Jodie,
I would try and attend the funeral and perhaps see if they will be in need of a meal in a few weeks...a Mass card is always a wonderful gift.
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God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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missionfamily
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| Posted: Aug 26 2009 at 12:31am | IP Logged
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Does your church take donations for flowers on the altar in memory of someone...that's a nice thought for a fellow parishioner because you know the family will attend mass and see the notice. It is a quiet remembrance.
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Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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stellamaris
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| Posted: Aug 26 2009 at 4:29am | IP Logged
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I would certainly send a Mass card. Also, if you note the date on your calendar, in a year you can send another card or note of support. For those who grieve, anniversaries of the death of their loved one can be so hard, and they often feel as if no one is supporting them any longer. Sending a spiritual bouquet and acknowledging their on-going grief is one way to walk with them a step or two along a sorrowful path.
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In Christ,
Caroline
Wife to  dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
Flowing Streams
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Aug 26 2009 at 6:11am | IP Logged
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I agree with all, Jodie!
Check on the meals thing...the mother is likely numb at this point! Request for some Masses to be said for the young lady and send it as part of a spiritual bouquet. Often, the hardest part begins after the funeral is over and everyone else gets back to life as normal but mom still has her arms wrapped securely around that Cross...a simple acknowledgment that you are still holding their family in prayer a few weeks and months down the road brings great comfort to a mother who will likely feel very alone even among large crowds.
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Paula in MN
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| Posted: Aug 26 2009 at 6:52am | IP Logged
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I'm agreeing with everyone else, and heartily recommending the meals option. We recently went through this with a family from Church, and they had enough meals for six weeks. Cooking and grocery shopping were the last things they needed or wanted to do.
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Paula
A Catholic Harvest
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: What do you do?
