Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 1:43pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Fostering Truth: Foster care, Catholic teaching, and an honest effort to make sense of a system charged with the guardianship of vulnerable children...plus a tiny hope of improving care is my new blog and I could sure use some "Encouraging, supportive, informative, and often humorous chat to energize and reassure" (the description of this Mother Nurture forum) right about now.

As many of you know, I'm not much of a blogger but I want...no need... some place to put all the questions that are swirling in my head. I want to force myself to be objective and clear minded and hope that my writing will help me to be disciplined in thought and action. I also need help sorting out the chaos. There is a tiny, tiny, spark of hope within me that wants this to lead to improved services in foster care.

This blog is about the foster care system and not about mothering my foster children. I have a private blog for that. There are many foster moms who public blog and do a great job letting us peek into this world.    

I would love to hear from experienced foster mothers, mothers considering this route, adults who experienced foster care as children, plus anyone who has experience with government agencies, can make persuasive arguments and can find weaknesses in mine, wants to encourage this ministry, can share Church teachings that can shed light on the challenges, and enjoys looking at macro-level questions and how they play out in the lives of real people...especially vulnerable children.

If you are more comfortable with this message board format, feel free to PM me here with any of your insights. Thanks SO much! And......begging for prayers... praying for you in return .

ETA: I would also welcome - very much - any bloggers who can help me to improve the blog. Thanks!

Love,



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JodieLyn
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 1:57pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

Angie, I'll be passing this along to some Catholic friends here who have been dealing with the system for some time. Good luck with your new blog.

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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 2:04pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Thank you, Jodie! I'm especially interested in how different states handle foster care...which ones do what best.

Love,

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Waverley
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 2:13pm | IP Logged Quote Waverley

I'm so glad you posted this here. I didn't know you are a foster family.

We are also a foster family and are active both locally and nationally in foster care issues. Being a foster parent has been one of the greatest blessings of my life. I can't wait to visit your blog!!

Thanks.

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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 2:26pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Waverley, fantastic! I look forward to getting to know you, your take on these serious matters, and sharing good information.

s and job well done, mom!

Love,

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Angie Mc
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amyable
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 3:01pm | IP Logged Quote amyable

I'm no help on either the foster care or blogging front, but I just wanted you to know I'm praying for you and your blog. You are a blessing.

Now, having swirling thoughts and blogging to help clear them up, THAT I understand.

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Cay Gibson
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Posted: May 19 2009 at 3:24pm | IP Logged Quote Cay Gibson

Angie,
Your new blog made me .

Especially since I came here depressed after reading this.

I know people have changes in their lives and, sometimes, the change is necessary; but seeing a lovely blog close gives me the same "down-in-the-dumps" feeling as when someone leaves hsing to put their child in the school system.

So, again, your new blog made me . It will be such a blessing to so many!

Yay, Angie!

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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 20 2009 at 10:13am | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

amyable wrote:

Now, having swirling thoughts and blogging to help clear them up, THAT I understand.


AMY! You have such a knack for bringing a smile to my face...and cracking me up! Especially now, this is priceless .

Cay Gibson wrote:

So, again, your new blog made me . It will be such a blessing to so many!

Yay, Angie!


Thanks for the encouragement, Cay. I don't know if it will be a blessing to anyone other than me ...but already, my time spent writing on the blog put my brain and behavior in a better place for this meeting. I know I don't have to be perfect in how I advocate for the children, but I do feel a great responsibility to be my best...to open myself as best as I can to the amazing work of the Holy Spirit. Plus, at the blog I'm hopeful that I'll receive help from others much more experienced and knowledgeable than I am. So really, its all about me...but we all knew that .

Love,

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folklaur
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Posted: May 20 2009 at 11:18am | IP Logged Quote folklaur

Angie, I think it looks great, and we are praying for you all.
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Posted: May 20 2009 at 2:33pm | IP Logged Quote MrsM

Angie,

Thanks so much for sharing this. We know three couples who did/are doing foster-to-adopt, and your blog is giving me some real insight into what they experience. God bless your new adventure!

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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 26 2009 at 1:54pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Thanks so much, Laura and Lynn! I really need your prayers and encouragement . I'm so focused on my little world right now that just knowing others are thinking of us, cheering us on, means a lot.

I just made a format change to the blog. I am switching to a three posts a week format instead of a daily post format, to better order my time and to keep the volume down - for writer and readers alike:). I plan to post on Tuesdays about Church Teachings related to our family's foster-to-adopt path plus Thursdays and Saturdays I will share our experience, questions, and ideas for improving care. To this end, I have backtracked and re-dated a few previously published posts, to republish in the near future, fitting the new format. I'll also mix in fresh posts.

Thanks to all who have visited!

Love,

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BlessedBGod
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Posted: May 27 2009 at 7:16am | IP Logged Quote BlessedBGod

Hi Miss Angie,
     I haven't posted here in awhile but the moderator from the, "Ora Et Labora" board pm'ed and let me know about your blog. I wrote a big, long post to reply to your blog but the blog wouldn't let me post it. I'm not familiar with how to post on blogs, since I stick with the boards online. Oh well.
     So, anyways, you know we foster-to-adopt too. We've been doing it for about 6 years now and have fostered eleven children. We also have been homeschooling with Seton for the past 12 years now. I have found the same situations are true as you posted in your blog about how things are run with social services and with fostering. Some of the names for the jobs may be a little different but basically they are the same type of jobs. I think a major source of contention right now for foster parents would be the new shared parenting we are supposed to implement. I mean recently I had to talk with some strung out people on the phone and even had their friends in my home without an invitation. A social worker just dropped by with them. That is outrageous to show a birth family where we live and have to listen to their ranting on the phone. It's so upsetting. One of the parents was on the most wanted list for a long time in our county and then they had him go into a foster home to visit with his daughter who was later adopted by them. This notorious criminal knows where they live. Unacceptable.
     We need more of a Catholic presence on the internet as far as fostering and domestic adoption are concerned.   Do you ever visit this website?     http://fosterparents.c om/CHAT/viewforum.php?f=1&sid=2a548daa3388badf3e42c2b6c5c293 6c     It's not specifically Christian but it is informative and interesting.
     It is refreshing to read a blog like yours. I hear there have been some major changes in Arizona with the foster system and the finances. Has that affected you much? God bless you in your efforts. -BlessedBGod     JMJ

http://fosterparents.com/CHAT/viewforum.php?f=1&sid=2a548daa 3388badf3e42c2b6c5c2936c
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Angie Mc
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Posted: May 27 2009 at 9:33am | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

BlessedBGod wrote:
Hi Miss Angie,
       I wrote a big, long post to reply to your blog but the blog wouldn't let me post it. I'm not familiar with how to post on blogs, since I stick with the boards online. Oh well.


Thanks for letting me know, Blessed! I rechecked my comments settings and made some adjustments that will hopefully allow easier access. For now, anyone can comment (no need for Google ID, etc.), no comment verification, and I will moderate comments to avoid spam, etc. If you, or anyone else, still has problems, please let me know...thanks!

Thanks, too, for your encouragement and insight. I'm sorry you faced such an extreme disregard for your privacy and protection. I haven't personally experienced "shared parenting," yet I plan to explore the assumptions underlying it as well as the practical applications. Once again, I may be finding good intentions *yet* is there a foundation of truth to place the intentions upon? Is there emperical evidence to prove it works and, if so, under what circumstances? Who decides? There is a lot to chew on there for sure.

Thanks for your website recommendation; I'll check it out! Currently, I don't participate on boards or blogs other than 4Real (and that will not change...you've all been warned ). I went ahead and started my own blog, as a newbie and a questioner. For now, I want to keep myself within my own experience so that I can better see it, be confused, and ask my own questions...away from the certainty, influence, opinions, and emotions of others, if that makes sense? I won't be a newbie for long so I want to mine it now for all it is worth .

Love,     

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Angie Mc
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Posted: June 09 2009 at 9:52am | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

I finally added the Fostering Truth blog link to my signature line in the hopes of making it easier for 4Real members to visit from time to time. Thanks for your ongoing support through visiting the blog, your encouraging words here, and of course...your prayers!

Love,

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Waverley
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Posted: June 09 2009 at 3:50pm | IP Logged Quote Waverley

Angie,

I have been reading your blog and enjoying it very much. I, like you, do not participate on foster care forums or boards.

I would like to say upfront that I do not know if the board recommended by BlessedBGod is one of the boards I visited in the past, but of the ones I did visit I felt I could not participate in the discussions. I personally have chosen never to speak ill of my children's birth parents - in real life or on the internet. The risk of potential harm is too great - to the children, to my family and to the process. My job as a foster parent is to care for the precious souls entrusted to my care and to facilitate in the reunification of children with their biological family. Speaking ill of birth parents, in my opinion, is not conducive to this process or to the mental health of my foster children.

I agree with BlessedBGod that a positive, thoughtful voice, like yours, reminding those of us of the reasons and calling to become foster parents is needed. For me, when times are tough and I am in a panic about the future of my foster children, lashing out at those in the system or running the system is not effective. Prayer is, reminding myself to listen and trust in God is. Reading your last several posts has been inspiring and refreshing.

Keep up the good work.

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