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LLMom Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 19 2005
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Posted: Dec 28 2007 at 8:05pm | IP Logged
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I think it is wonderful how many of you are trying to simplify, declutter, live joyfully, make your home a haven, etc. I know how to do all of this. I have read many books and have wonderful lists and schedules. My big problem is follow through. Getting and staying motivated. SO how do we go about motivating ourselves to do all of these wonderful ideas?
__________________ Lisa
For veteran & former homeschool moms
homeschooling ideas
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Mary Chris Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 27 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 28 2007 at 8:28pm | IP Logged
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Lisa that is the million dollar question.
I am sure my house would be really clean if I stopped thinking and started doing.
I think baby steps is part of the answer. I have been very committed to grabbing the laundry every morning and starting it when I let the dog out. Then I have my kiddos fold it while they watch the Magic School Bus. I think having them fold one or two loads is a lot more manageable than a mountain.
Also ruthless decluttering is a good thing. I love how clear and open some areas of my house look now.
Looking forward to hear how others get motivated and start, but now I have to get some work done.
__________________ Blessings, Mary Chris Beardsley
mom to MacKenzie3/95, Carter 12/97 Ronan 3/00 and wife to Jim since 1/92
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Anne McD Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 21 2006
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Posted: Dec 28 2007 at 8:35pm | IP Logged
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Mary Chris wrote:
I am sure my house would be really clean if I stopped thinking and started doing.
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Yep, what she said. I have a problem getting overwhelmed, thinking everything will take way longer than I expect it to. But when I find myself walking away from a mess, I tell myself (sometimes) to just take five minutes, and its usually picked up sooner than that. Also, I have a tendency to be a perfectioninst, so I won't do something if I don't think I can do it perfectly well. As my dh once told me, "dear, a half-"youknowwhat"'ed job is better than a no-"youknowwhat" job.
__________________ Anne
Wife to Jon
Mommy to Alex 9
James 8
Katie 6
William 3 1/2
Benedict Joseph 1
and baby on the way! 10/14
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Mary Chris Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 27 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 28 2007 at 9:39pm | IP Logged
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I have been thinking that maybe we can find a prayer to say for each other every day. To help encourage us and motivate us in our efforts.
__________________ Blessings, Mary Chris Beardsley
mom to MacKenzie3/95, Carter 12/97 Ronan 3/00 and wife to Jim since 1/92
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~Rachel~ Forum All-Star
Joined: March 29 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 28 2007 at 10:31pm | IP Logged
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I have a new motto... One at a time!!
It means I plan to create new habits... By focussing on one thing at a time. My other motto is "do it now". I figure this way, I get things done!!
__________________ ~Rachel~
Wife to William
Mum to James 13, Lenore 8
Lighting a Fire
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asplendidtime Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 14 2005 Location: Canada
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Posted: Dec 29 2007 at 11:23am | IP Logged
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I try to do the Flylady trick, which is you can do anything for 15 minutes, and if you pile together 15 minute increments over time soon your task will get done! I used to just neglect my garden because I didn't have 2 hours to weed it anymore... But 20 minutes here and there over a week, and my garden looked a lot better, and I felt great!
I also don't repeat things I don't have to. I don't like making meal menus. So I made three for three months and I just use and rotate what I have, I don't repeat the pain every few weeks.
Ultimately the satisfaction I get when things do get done, or they do run smoothly like my menus, frees me up for more time to do other things, I can tackle my next problem. I have not been behind on laundry in a long time(I am a bit now because of Christmas), even though I was struggling with fatigue and morning sickness.
So I think like Rachel said, accomplish one goal, feel good about it, then move onto the next good one.
__________________ Rebecca~Mama to
Noah 17,
Katie 16,
Mary 14,
Tim 13,
Jonah 12,
Josh 10,
Zoe 9,
Will 7,
Peter 6,
Laura-Mae 4,
Emily-Joy 2,
Genevieve & Gabriella 1
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Cay Gibson Forum All-Star
Joined: July 16 2005 Location: Louisiana
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Posted: Dec 29 2007 at 4:23pm | IP Logged
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I answered this last night and lost the whole thing due to my server crashing. It keeps doing that. I'm still bombed about having lost it because I won't (for the life of me) remember the 10 steps I listed.
Getting motivated is easy. I'm there.
Staying motivated is my Achilles' Heel but I think the biggest stay-all is KISSing it (Keep it Simple, Sweetie). After all, the whole idea is to keep it simple.
I think the biggest hindrance to keeping it simple is that we see and hear everyone's great ideas and we want to do it all. Impossible.
Some of the things (that I can remember having typed last night) I'll do to keep it simple and doable are:
1) read Sarah's Home Sweet Home Challenge on a weekly basis and try to follow it
2) do a decade of the rosary daily with my children
3) I signed up for the 2008 Declutter Calendar that Pam linked in the Simplicity thread and printed out the January page and hung it on my refrigerator. I am committed to doing it and have already told myself that if I miss a day or skip several days I will not try to go back and play catch-up (because I know I won't do it and I'll let the whole idea go). I will simple start with whatever day it is and start fresh.
4) SCHOOL---I am finally getting rid of workbooks and sheets that I have always used as my back-up system. We are switching to Teaching Textbook for math (for everyone) and doing Sonlight/FIAR for everything else because I've always believed (and preached and seen) that science, history, spelling, grammar, writing, religion etc. can be taught through reading. We will have math in the morning and reading throughout the day. That's about it folks. And we will carry on as we have been doing with random studies, field trips, programs, crafts, etc. And I will no longer feel guilty that we aren't doing our "school work". Things like "crafts" won't be planned. If they evolve and we get them done, that's great! But I'm not stressing if we don't.
There was more but this is all I can remember...for now.
__________________ Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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Maryan Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 02 2007
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Posted: Dec 29 2007 at 4:27pm | IP Logged
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Bribery.
I don't let myself eat ice cream etc. until I have done such n such.
__________________ Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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Matilda Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 17 2007 Location: Texas
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Posted: Dec 29 2007 at 5:31pm | IP Logged
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Anne,
I have been using your husband's philosophy to try to keep myself motivated only I have a different phrase for it. "Mezzopresto"
(In musical terms "mezzo" means half and "presto" means fast. Say them together quickly.)
It took me a long time to realize I was a perfectionist because most people tend to think of a perfectionist as someone whose house has to be perfect and mine is a far cry from it. My perfectionism manifests itself in a different way... if I can't do the job perfectly, then I can't do it at all. I will spend so much time figuring out the proper order of a job and then get frustrated because I can't "figure it out just right".
Maybe I should try Maryan's idea except that it probably wouldn't help with the "body clutter" I am also dealing with. See...perfectionism rears its ugly head again!
__________________ Charlotte (Matilda)
Mom to four (11, 10, 9 & 5) an even split for now
with bookend boys and a double girl sandwich
Waltzing Matilda
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Nina Murphy Forum All-Star
Joined: May 18 2006 Location: California
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Posted: Dec 29 2007 at 7:02pm | IP Logged
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I think we have to accept that we all are *good* at certain things (or getting them done) and not as good at others. It depends what internally motivates us. What brings you peace....and gives you that "right" feeling (tranquility, order)? That's usually what gets done first.
The problem comes along when you start to feel guilt or discontent: when the things you feel internally ought to be done but you just can't get to them all--- because you are truly overwhelmed by the sheer numbers.
Then you have to choose the BASIC things for you and your family to run smoothly, and delegate/ask for help if necessary. And lower your expectations of "living joyfully" or "keeping to schedule" all of the time. I think re-writing our definitions of things (cognitive therapy!) works if we stick to it and keep up the habit.
Also, life dictates a lot. It humbles you to such a point that you are happier with less. Then: you kind of go into survival mode, and things become clarified. What do you *really* need....?
I think we moms of mega-large families hit a place of shock. I am definitely there! I am truly a born "perfectionist" who is very frustrated by mess and noise and disorder. But what can I do? I simply have changed over time and accepted a lower standard. We do learn as we age and adjust accordingly or we go insane or just give up.
My kids tend to be happy if they are clean, fed, rested and hugged!
__________________ God bless,
~~Nina
mother of 9 on earth,
and 2 yet-to-be-met
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