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Patty
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| Posted: March 16 2009 at 8:22pm | IP Logged
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Okay, maybe I'm just crazy, but I wondered if anyone else had any experiences like mine.
I'm 47, definitely premenopausal with longer and lighter cycles, and thought I wasn't having ANY hormonal symptoms (unless you count the three hot flashes I've had in the past five years!)
However, last fall after being around a certain relative, talking about old times and looking at photos, the floodgates of my mind seemed to let loose and I experienced VERY vivid memories...both good and bad...from decades ago. I do have a very good, very vivid memory but these were things I NEVER thought about anymore. I lost a brother at age 18 and it was like I was reliving it. There was a young man I liked very much before dh and I met, and I could remember exactly how I felt, etc.
Lately it has been better, until the last few days when I've been reliving things from when dh and I were dating and first married...a lot of it good but some things I'd like to change if I could, though of course that is impossible.
Is this some kind of mid-life thing? I've never had anything quite like this happen to me before. Please tell me I'm not nuts! (or if I am, tell me gently)
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: March 16 2009 at 10:09pm | IP Logged
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Well, at 45 I have had way more than 3 hot flashes 
I could see your experience happening though, as at certain times of my cycle, watch out. Stuff is just more...intense? Trying to think of a good word and that is the best I can do. So, I haven't had the vivid memory thing but could see it happening.
So, I don't think you are nuts 
Anne--who is just loving this journey through her 40's 
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MaryM
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| Posted: March 16 2009 at 10:18pm | IP Logged
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I am very close to turning 45, and I have similar memory experiences but don't think for me it is a function of age/changes/hormones. I have always been a very memory intense person and get very emotional and nostaligic easily. I definitely don't think you are crazy and do think you could be experienceing this in relation to hormonal shifts - they very much affect emotions and memories are part of our emotional tanks.
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Mary M. in Denver
Our Domestic Church
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hylabrook1
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| Posted: March 17 2009 at 11:56am | IP Logged
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I also have re-thought (and perhaps over-thought) things from the distant past, replaying conversations in my head and berating myself for not having handled things better. I can get stuck in a cycle of not believing that I can be forgiven for bad choices I made back then. Then I'll have a bit of a lighter thought, about how I wouldn't *know better* now if I hadn't gone through those other things. Of course if I encountered those same situations now, with the maturity that must have come with experience and age, I would have done differently. I can only hope that God is very aware of my shortcomings, both past and present (and undoubtedly future), and that when I recognize and repent of things that I just wasn't able or ready to *get*, He is compassionate and merciful. I once talked this over with my pastor, who said that this is what is meant by "living in hope". He seemed to think it is pretty common as part of becoming more mature, and that it's about being able to see spiritual growth in ourselves, which is a good thing.
Still, it is not easy to re-visit the past, especially when it just seems to sneak up and grab you when you don't feel like thinking about it.
Peace,
Nancy
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Patty
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| Posted: March 18 2009 at 7:34am | IP Logged
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Thanks, everyone! At least I'm not the only one.
I don't know why these vivid memories are hitting me harder these past few months, but it could be related to changing hormones. I don't know how I would know that for sure.
I have always had very detailed memories, even of years past. A friend I confided in was amazed at all I remembered. The thing is, I usually don't think about most of this stuff. I described it to her as a library of books on a shelf; I know they're there, but don't take all the books down and read them. Last fall, however, it was like the books were flying off the shelf and hitting me in the head! Pages flying open even when I wasn't trying to remember.
Ah well. I've been praying about it and asking the Lord for the grace to handle it, and to learn whatever it is He wants to teach me through this.
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anitamarie
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| Posted: April 17 2009 at 8:48pm | IP Logged
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I find that memories have come up for me when I am ready to process them, and have God along with me this time. I feel like he is showing them to me for a reason and then I can move on from them. KWIM? It seems as if they keep coming back until I can get through my head what it is He is trying to teach me. Just one person's experience, though. This has happened to me most of my adult life, so I wouldn't peg it to hormones, necessarily, although mine have always been wacky, so who knows?
God Bless,
Anita
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: April 17 2009 at 9:29pm | IP Logged
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I think definately hormones.. after all pregnant women are know to have very vivid and intense dreams.. so it seems that hormones can intensify things.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Blestwith8
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| Posted: April 29 2009 at 8:23pm | IP Logged
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I am 50 and definetly in Menopause. Hot Flashes. Oh yeah! So much so I will head out to our RV at night and sleep with no blankets or heat on. My Dr infuriated me by giving me a HRT that was a BC Pill. I refuse to take it. I have coverage through an HMO and I can not get BIH (progesterone cream) through my Doc. So I just ordered some off the internet.
MY emotions are similar to yours Patty, in that old memories and seeing things like recipes written in my Mom or Grandmas handwriting will just send me into a flood of tears. I am also experiencing incredible fatigue. I take Flax seed oil, and take Super Mom Vitmains.
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time4tea
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| Posted: May 18 2009 at 6:10am | IP Logged
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I have always been one to have very vivid memories, even as a small child recollecting certain events would bring on tears. I still have those vivid memories, but now they are even more poignent because often times, I wish some of the people I have the memories about were still here to meet my dc and sit down and have a cup of tea with me and share their wisdom with me about so many things. For myself personally, it isn't hormonal, it's just "me" - who has always been way too emotional at times 
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Blessings to you!
~Tea
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4Real Forums : St. Anne's Tearoom: Growing in Wisdom over 40
Topic: Hormones, emotions, and strong memories
