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Theresa H
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in the checkout line? I had my tired 18 month old along who was acting grumpy. The cashier then says, "It can be hard to be a grandma." My mothering instinct kicks in when I say, "She's mine." Luckily it was time to move on by then.
I know this is not life shattering, but has any one else experienced this situation? If so,please let me know how you handled it? It would be great to know I have company out there.
Thanks in advance for any comments.
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Theresa from OK
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Elena
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Happened to me. At my daughter's ballet class and someone said something about taking my granddaughter to class. Of course I was pregnant then so I pulled my coat open to show my belly and smiled and said, "she's my daughter!"
On the other end of the spectrum, my 16-year-old was carrying his baby sister at the grocery store and someone came up and said how cute she was and asked my son if the baby was his first!!! He quickly turned all shades of red and said in a loud disgusted voice, "SHE's MY SISTER!!!" 
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Theresa H
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Elena,
Thanks for the quick reply! Nice to know I'm not alone.
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Theresa from OK
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esperanza
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I was in the back of church sitting with my dd 11mos. and two of my grand dds 20 mos and 5 mos...and was asked what are the age differences of my daughters? 
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MicheleQ
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Elena wrote:
| On the other end of the spectrum, my 16-year-old was carrying his baby sister at the grocery store and someone came up and said how cute she was and asked my son if the baby was his first!!! He quickly turned all shades of red and said in a loud disgusted voice, "SHE's MY SISTER!!!" |
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This happens to my older boys all the time. They are forever having to explain that the baby is their SISTER not daughter. But they are older (about to turn 21 and 22). Still, it happened when they were younger too.
FYI I am now "officially" able to post in this forum - I feel so wise.
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Michele Quigley
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Cay Gibson
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Elena wrote:
| On the other end of the spectrum, my 16-year-old was carrying his baby sister at the grocery store and someone came up and said how cute she was and asked my son if the baby was his first!!! He quickly turned all shades of red and said in a loud disgusted voice, "SHE's MY SISTER!!!" |
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My oldest ds' girlfriend babysits two sisters. One has celebal palsy and is in a little wheelchair. Corey and Julie take the girls out to eat sometimes and bowling or putt-putt.
Corey doesn't say anything. He loads and unloads the wheelchair and carries the 2-yr-old. But Julie has told me that she's embarrassed when they go out sometimes because she'll see someone she knows and they're probably thinking, "Gosh, two kids already!" and they're too polite to come over and ask.
But they do it anyway for the girls. And two little ones make very good chaperons.
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Cay Gibson
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hylabrook1
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We got a lot of this when my oldest dd went places with me and youngest dd. They are exactly 14 years apart. We both got lots of *dirty looks* from people who felt the need to express their disapproval, even though they didn't know the facts. It taught me a lot about not judging others because I don't know the real story!
Peace,
Nancy
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Liz D
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It has happened to me,too, when I was with my 16 yo dd and my 1 yo son. I think it happens to a lot of us. My neighbor has had the opposite problem: where a grocery store clerk won't let her check out her groceries because her mother wasn't with her. My neighbor is in her mid-30's!
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Theresa H
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Thank you ladies for all your stories! My heart is not so heavy anymore knowing other have had similar experiences. My dear oldest son tells me "you're not old and you don't act old". That's the most important thing.
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Theresa from OK
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julia s.
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MicheleQ wrote:
FYI I am now "officially" able to post in this forum - I feel so wise. |
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Happy Birthday Michelle!
I'm an unofficial lurker -- wisdom won't kick in for a couple years yet!
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There are 13 and 15 years between the two youngest in my family, and I got mistaken as the mother all the time. My brother and sister made it a point to talk about Mom and call me by my first name, so that people could overhear that I was their big sister. 
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Willa
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Theresa H wrote:
| in the checkout line? I had my tired 18 month old along who was acting grumpy. The cashier then says, "It can be hard to be a grandma." My mothering instinct kicks in when I say, "She's mine." Luckily it was time to move on by then. |
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I am always meeting people my age, handling kids the age of my younger two, and wondering whether I am looking at another older mom or a grandma. About 80 percent of the time it's a grandma raising or caring for her child's kids. I try not to make any assumptions until they tell me, but statistically, meeting the older moms is rarer than meeting the young grandmas, at least in my area.
When Patrick, my youngest, was staying in the NICU, the bulk of the other moms visiting their babies could have been my own kids -- they were literally around the age of my older children. I felt really old, and I was only 40 back then.
And my daughter was constantly being mistaken for Patrick's mother, particularly at hospital follow-up visits. And she was only 13 at the time. Sigh!
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ALmom
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My 15 year old daughter visits nursing homes with my grandother - and they often take one of the younger children along. She always is asked about her "children" who are really her siblings. She was even assumed to be the mom of her 10 year old brother. It has really started to bother her - I tell her it is just because they are sweet old ladies and don't see too well. Of course, they probably see better than I do so I don't think my daughter buys my explanation.
I, on the other hand, am never mistaken for grandma. I'm just always asked if I'm pregnant - wish I was pregnant but since I'm not it is sometimes hard, but I know the people who ask usually feel worse than I do.
Janet
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LLMom
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I have had it happen several times. The last time was in May for dd First COmmunion someone asked me if she was my grand daughter! SHe is 8. Of course he is a nationality that is know for having black hair for many years before beginning to gray so he doesn't have too many relatives with gray hair.
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Essy
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It's always happening to me on the other end of things. My parents were in their forties when they had me and were constantly being taken for my grandparents...especially later in life. I was once out to breakfast with my oldest sister and my dad and one of the waitresses commented about me being there with my mom and my grandfather...lol. I didn't mind it at all...but they weren't too thrilled...lol. I'll probably get it at some point myself since mine are five and three now...but I guess having experienced it so much on the other end, I'll hopefully be ready for it.
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kris
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Yes, this has happened at least once with my last three :(.....but on the other hand, I was with my 20 yo son once and someone referred to me as his wife!
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SallyT
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We have some very good friends who are in their early/mid-20s, whose kids are friends with my youngest daughter, who's 3. One day my friend was rattling on about her mother -- "this 43-year-old lady!" I'll be 43 in December, and this kind of thing always takes me aback, even though intellectually I KNOW I have mom-friends whose parents are,um, a little younger than my parents. I guess that since my oldest is only 13, I don't always think that I could have had babies much earlier than I did, and that they could now be the age of these friends of ours . . .
Pax,
Sally, who is feeling very creaky these days
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c_rob
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By far the worst was when (10 years ago) a check-out woman told my then 8 year old - in front of me! - to tell her mother it was time to stop embarrassing her by having so many babies. I think the manager I spoke to might have sorted her out! We continue to shop there and continue to shock there with our steadily expanding family.
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Angie Mc
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c_rob wrote:
| By far the worst was when (10 years ago) a check-out woman told my then 8 year old - in front of me! - to tell her mother it was time to stop embarrassing her by having so many babies. |
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Now this is the stuff that gets my Irish temper up! It is one thing to disrespect me, but to bring my child into it...common courtesy, where are you?
Welcome to the board, c. 
Love,
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Angie Mc
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c_rob
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Hi Angie,
I'm in Sydney, Australia. Thanks for the welcome. I LOVE this site.
Christine
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4Real Forums : St. Anne's Tearoom: Growing in Wisdom over 40
Topic: Has this happened to you...
