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CrunchyMom Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 03 2007
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 2:36pm | IP Logged
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My boys were cleaning their playroom last week before company came over, and after working "all day" (yk, like when they think you've been making them "work" all day when, really, they've been "playing" all day and all you've done is tell them repeatedly to stop dawdling), they came up with this solution:
Hey, Mom. Maybe we should just never play in our playroom again so that it never gets dirty again.
Obviously, not going to work. But it did make me comment that while it is probably okay to get the toy room messy, it might be a bit extreme that they'd managed to trash the living room AND family room on top of the toy room and bedroom.
Now, the living room in our house is on the main level with the kitchen and dining room. The family room (where most of our children's books are as well as the computer monitor and laptop for watching movies is) is down a level. The "boy floor" is up two levels and has the bedroom, toy room, and bathroom (skipping the level with the master bedroom, bath, office, and sewing room/4th bedroom).
So, my question is, would you consider having spaces in your home that are off limits. Strictly speaking, the sewing room is, but it is hardly an oasis. More like a giant closet.
Other than that, the boys go everywhere. And within MINUTES I think, truly, a room can be trashed with seemingly little effort on the part of the children.
My home growing up was much smaller, so it was never an issue. No possibility of restriction with no extra rooms.
Our former home was the same way.
Dh's home was not huge, but he grew up not being allowed in the formal living room. However, he also went to school.
Just wondering what other situations are like. Does anyone's strategy for maintaining order involve keeping certain areas of the home restricted in some way?
I have 4 boys 8 and under. They never just "sit" on the sofa or chair. It almost always involves displacement of cushions in one form or another. Just today I asked about where my funnel was since the boys had been unloading the dishwasher since I'd last seen it, and my 6 year old knew exactly where it was--in the couch in the living room. My four year old spends most of his down time upside down. He always has since he was 18 months old or so. Now it means legs up and over the back of the chair or sofa with his head in the cushions. And while I don't think that they have diagnosable sensory issues, they are constantly rubbing up against stuff (and putting their feet on things ) and every folded blanket they see is wrapped around their head and dragged through the house and left somewhere random and dirty.
ALL THAT to say, even seemingly passive activities like reading books or watching a movie somehow results in MASSIVE CHAOS very quickly.
And I'm just wondering if confining my children to specific spaces might contain the chaos somewhat. Our home isn't huge, but navigating a larger space or even the concept of multiple spaces is something I've never experienced before, neither as mother nor as a child.
__________________ Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
My Symphony
[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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stellamaris Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 26 2009 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 2:44pm | IP Logged
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In Virginia, absolutely restrict our living room and dining room to quiet discussion, instrument practice, and eating politely. No wild play, toys, etc., in those rooms. If fact, when we originally added on the living room, I had french doors installed so that I could see what was going on from inside, but still keep everyone out (well, more or less ) It is a great place for my dh and me to talk over the day! My bedroom is also sacrosanct. I just need to have a place to retreat that is not demolished, for my own happy peace of mind.
Our rental home is basically one room with a few bedrooms off of it, but, even so, we have a living room "area" that remains neat. Toys are restricted to bedrooms, garage, and the school area during non-school times. Probably if the boys were younger, they would have toys out more often, though. Still, I insist here that NO TOYS are allowed in my room.
I don't think it hurts anyone to learn that there is a time and place for toys, and it isn't everywhere all the time .
ETA: And, yes, like you I had multiple boys...probably a factor in why I finally had to "contain the chaos"!
__________________ In Christ,
Caroline
Wife to dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
Flowing Streams
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CrunchyMom Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 03 2007
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 2:52pm | IP Logged
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stellamaris wrote:
If fact, when we originally added on the living room, I had french doors installed so that I could see what was going on from inside, but still keep everyone out |
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A few weeks ago, we were considering taking down a wall for a more open space. Now, I'm considering more French doors (though, the finger prints could potentially kill me )
__________________ Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
My Symphony
[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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JennGM Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 4:06pm | IP Logged
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We used to have a playroom when I was growing up. It's such a good thing.
Eventually the basement will become the main place of play, but I still like having my boys around with some toys so I can keep them on this main level. And I don't like toys in the bedroom.
I always think of Farmer Boy and how the parlor was reserved and always clean for any guests. That's what I originally wanted my living room space to be. My mother did that, also. I want it to be more formal, so that it's nice for music practice and reading and prayer time, but not conducive for play.
Lindsay, you describe SOO much of what goes on here. I never can understand how can there be chaos when reading or watching a movie? Constant motion, that's what it is.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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Chris V Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 03 2009 Location: Washington
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 4:45pm | IP Logged
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Restricted spaces?! Um, YES (is that a little too enthusiastic?) This is how I function! ... that and I know darn well there's a reason our good and gracious God gave me girls rather than boys. I couldn't handle it. Honestly, I would drive my own self to insanity trying to keep the house orderly.
We have a playroom upstairs. I love the playroom. Bless the playroom! Once a week-ish, we'll all go up there and tackle the disorderly hurricane that has hit. Putting things back together (doll clothes with doll clothes, puzzles pieces with the puzzles, kitchen toys with kitchen toys, trains with trains, legos with the legos, blah blah blah) - honestly, I am the only person in this house who actually cares about organizing toys. My girls don't. *But* they do see benefit once we've managed to reorganize and have the room looking tip-top and functioning smoothly.
Our master bedroom is off limits (generally speaking). They will migrate in there in the morning as I'm getting myself ready, just to hang out and watch me, but the rule is "pack out what you pack in" as soon as I leave the room.
The guest bedroom, also off limits.
They can play in their own bedroom (the older three share a room) amd they can play in the twins' bedroom (which the twins aren't using yet, they're still in our bedroom). And the playroom, of course. Nobody likes to play in our living room, it's boring ...just furniture and a wood burning stove.
We have a "nook" (architectually this was intended to be a dining room, but we don't use it as such) this is a favorite space to play (and home to most of my homeschool resources).
I think it's perfectly reasonable to have areas within your home that aren't for play, not when so much of it is widely available for their use.
__________________ Chris
Happy Wife with my Happy Life
Mama to My Five Girls ('04~'07~'09~'11~'11)
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Mimip Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 17 2009 Location: Florida
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1526
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Posted: Sept 13 2012 at 4:57pm | IP Logged
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Yep, we sure do have restricted spaces. Toys aren't bought into Mom and Dad's room and the 4th bedroom that is technically my Mom's room is completely off limits. Also no toys go into our living room. All toys are in the school room, playroom or in the bedrooms. Those rooms are huge in this house but the living room is not. I really thought I was like Chris, the Lord has stretched me so much with boys. I have to die to myself so many times about the mess.
In fact as we speak I have paid my daughter to clean the boys bedroom. It is such a mess that I truly feel that if I was to clean it I would throw away EVERYTHING!!!!!
Our bookcases are in the schoolroom and along the master bedroom hallway. The kids can bring coloring books and read aloud books into the living room during morning basket but if not the books are in other rooms as well.
HTH!
__________________ In Christ,
Mimi
Wife of 16 years to Tom, Mom of DD'00, DD'02, '04(in heaven) DS'05, DS'08 and DS '12
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