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10 Bright Stars
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Location: Virginia
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| Posted: Jan 14 2010 at 6:52pm | IP Logged
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Hi all,
As you might have recalled, there were prayers for my little William about a week or two ago. He was considered "failure to thrive" although he is doing well now. I have never had any nursing trouble with any of my kids. I mean NO trouble whatsoever. This little man won't seem to nurse. He does it occassionaly, IF he feels like it, but for the most part, he seems SO disintersted. He will take a bottle of the stuff, pumped, but I have mainly had to resort to formula so he will grow! (obviously the priority!  ) He either falls alseep nursing, or just doesn't even get a good enough suction going to really do much! My milk supply seems fine, by seeing what I pump, but he won't demand enough due to his lack of interest. This has caused me a lot of stress and frankly, sadness since I am used to mothering in that way. I am getting the hang of bottles, pacifiers and all the stuff I have never used, but I wonder why he won't nurse???? I am not eating anything that might be offensive to babies.. Very odd. Anyone else have this experience? Thank heavens for formula. I can't imagine him fairing well if we didn't have that invention with his extreme lack of willingness to feed. So, praise the Lord for formula!! Something I never thought I would say!  I honestly don't know if he would have thrived if we had lived in a different century. What a terrifying thought!!
Also, I have always enjoyed as a side benefit nursing spacing my babies nicely. (Every two years) That is sort of scarying me too as I had a very stressful birth experience and should not conceive for at least 18 months due to an emergency c-setion etc. Bummer, huh?? How can I encourage my little baby to nurse??? I am too afraid to rely on his nursing alone due to his initial problems with it and his general attitude at this point. (His health and growth are the priority, not nursing obviously, but I am just curious and find it so strange that he is so different from all my other children. The docs do not seem to think there is an issue with his mouth etc., so why would a baby not want to do something that is so "natural" to a baby????? 
I have nursed through VERY painful cases of thrush and things like that and have really tried and tried to work with him, even in the wee hours of the night when all I wanted to do was give him bottles and call it a day. (Which I usually did have to end up doing so he would eat.) Should I just give up???? I keep pumping thinking he will "come around", but I am probably deluding myself, huh? It is cute that everyone else can take part in feeding him too, but I have nursed 8 other children and they are all so lovely and healthy. I just wonder why he would be so different? (And yes, I know babies are all different and he is the sweetest little man ever. So, I am not complaining, although it sounds like that, just very curious if others have had such experiences with one baby being such a difference than all the others and what helped etc.?) I am so thankful he has turned a corner with his health and seems to be growing. (He just gained another pound at his docs appt. today.) I just find it all so confusing and a little frustrating/discouraging. ;
__________________
Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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stacykay
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Location: Michigan
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| Posted: Jan 14 2010 at 8:38pm | IP Logged
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My #2ds would not nurse. Lactation specialists, no one could figure it out. He latched on fine, but just wasn't interested. He wound up in the hospital at three weeks of age for an infection, but the nursing just never improved, and I was so sad to have to switch to bottles for him.
I didn't have any problems, then, until #6ds. He did have a patent omphalomesenteric duct (basically, the connections in his belly button remained open after birth) which required surgery at 10 days. About two weeks after that, I had him stripped down for a bath, and both my dh and I were taken aback at how thin he was. I said, that's it, he's going on formula. I nursed and used formula, until he got a little heftier, and then he only wanted to nurse. He ended up nursing until he was just over one; plus I was tired (43 1/2 years and almost 8 years spent nursing babies.)
So...  , Kim! I comforted myself with the fact that my other dss all nursed easily, and that for whatever reason, those two dss just didn't. It is very strange how different children can be with same mom and dad and same home!
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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KackyK
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| Posted: Jan 15 2010 at 6:59am | IP Logged
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My 5th kiddo had to go into the NICU after birth for 4 weeks. He was unable to eat (long story) for the first 3 of those weeks. I was pumping like crazy, so once he was cleared for taking by mouth, he received breast milk via a bottle. To be released home, they wanted him to start nursing. So after about a week of trying, he did it! But as soon as, I kid you not, we walked into the house, he totally refused me! I cried and cried. Dh gave him a bottle (of pumped milk) which he took right away...stinker!
Anyways, Dh had me do this and after about a week or two, it worked. We gave him the absolute minimum he needed via bottle. Then when he sucked the bottle dry, I switched to breastfeeding immediately. He balked the first couple of days. But eventually he realized that if he wanted more, this was where it was at. Once he decided he'd take the breast for some extra, then we gave less and less in the bottle. And like I said, after about 2 weeks, we were able to drop the bottles completely!
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KackyK
Mom to 8 - 3 dd, 5ds & 4 babes in heaven
Beginning With the Assumption
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kathleenmom
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| Posted: Jan 15 2010 at 8:17am | IP Logged
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Kim,
My 3rd wouldn't nurse either and I was a LLL leader  . It was so perplexing. I sought the help of a Lactation Consultant who taught me to do suck training. If their sucking is ineffectual, it is exhausting and they get no pay off for their hard work. Sounds like it might be worth a try to find a Lactation Consultant. PM me if you'd like.
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DH Daniel, Sophia Brigid (97), Russell Powers (99), Honoria Jane (02), John Patrick (05), Brigid Mary Feb. 24, 2007!
AMDG Academy
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10 Bright Stars
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| Posted: Jan 15 2010 at 9:00am | IP Logged
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Thank you for all the comments. They all had something helpful! I think I will experiment with getting him to switch mid-stream so to speak after giving him some bottle. Frankly, I think my confidence has really been shattered with nursing, and I am almost afraid to just rely on myself since he had such trouble in the beginning. This morning I pumped, and I had almost nothing which made me think I should just give up entirely. I think this is a low point in my day for some reason though as I did get plenty at 4 a.m. So odd how the amount fluctuates.
Kacky, I thought your comment about the coming home nursing strike was interesting. I wondered if it had something to do with my stress level when I first came home from the hospital after the c-section not making it come out fast enough and him getting frustrated? Maybe we got off to a bad start? Or, he seems to be annoyed by the noise in our house! (i.e. he really seemed to enjoy being in the hospital!!!! He was all smiles.) I usually will take him up to our room to be alone and quiet around dinnertime since he gets so fussy then. He calms right down and LOVES the pacifier, something else I have never, ever used!!! And, I agree, Kacky, I called mine a little stinker too! I sort of joked that he had to have "name brand" formula instead of the home brewed stuff. ) Another odd thing I noticed: It "seems" as if my milk makes him sleepy. Even when I give it to him in a bottle, he tends to relax more or sort of fall alseep with it whereas with the formula he is more alert. That's what happens when he tried to nurse too. He won't really do much and then he sort of passes out almost and puts his head on me like a pillow. Very cute, but what's the deal???? Did you all have that experience?? Maybe it is TOO relaxing?????
It is the same thing you all have said though. Just not interested. Can latch fairly well but then won't do anything from there, so maybe it is just some kids. I would be interested in learning about the suck training from Kathleen. It sounds like what maybe Kacky had mentioned??? Now I feel panicked like I should go and pump and pump to keep the milk there where I had become so discouraged this week that I have pumped less and less as the days go by. It is so hard to go upstairs and close the door to pump with 8 other children running around and homeschooling I must admit. You can't really pump with the family sitting around you! (too immodest!) I was surprised at how distraught I was over all of this though! I literally cried all day the day I brought him home from the hospital and lots of time since then. I felt as if I was mourning something!!!! I told myself that I had made the Total Consecration to the Blessed Mother and maybe that actually MEANT something and God was calling me to sacrifice something very sweet since I always thanked Him for the gift of nursing since it seems like such a cute little idea He had for the baby. Oh well. It is such an emotional rollercoaster. I am just glad he is healthy and he seems plum happy with the bottle, so maybe I am just too wrapped up in it????
I will give the bottle switch a try and maybe keep pumping for the week since I rented the hospital grade pump for the whole month anyway. I just keep thinking he will "convert" and come over to my way of doing things, but maybe he won't and I just have to prepare myself for that I suppose. (Sorry it sounds so "dramatic". It just feels painful and sort of "final" since once the milk is gone, so is my option for that. I also always think "this might be my last baby" (which I have been thinking since baby #5, but still, ) it MIGHT be. So, it would be sad to go out on such an odd note. I guess as long as he is happy, but it was just a little shocking I guess since 8 have done it one way to have such a different expereince all around. (Odd birth experience/odd nursing etc.)
Thanks for your time! It was very helpful. 
__________________
Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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stacykay
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Joined: April 08 2006
Location: Michigan
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| Posted: Jan 15 2010 at 9:59am | IP Logged
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Oh, I completely forgot about #3! He was giving me fits, too, when we came home. My parents were so tired of listening to me cry, they wondered why in the world all this fuss about nursing!  For him, what worked, was a contraption (can't recall the name of it,) that I filled with formula and hung around my neck, and it had two very tiny tubes coming out of the bottom that I had to tape to myself, with the ends of each ending at each *spot* where he would be nursing (trying to be discrete here.) There was a little clamp on each tube, so that I could adjust the flow of the formula. This gave him an impetus to nurse, and over just a few days, I was able to decrease the flow until it was just my milk he was getting.
Funny how I managed to block out that memory! I am sure any lactation consultant will know what I am talking about. The nurses at the hospital set me up with this ...whatchamacallit, so I know if the hospital had it, lactation experts would know what it is.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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4Real Forums : Our Lady of Good Remedy and Care
Topic: my baby won't nurse!!
