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JennGM Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 3:47pm | IP Logged
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I'm physically, mentally, emotionally at the end of my rope right now. I have had nothing cataclysmic happen to me, but I'm just bone weary, completely exhausted. The biggest factor I can target is that my young son has been sick all winter, so the nights have had very interrupted sleep for a long time.
I've changed my diet, been exercising steadily for over 2 weeks, which has kept me on survival mode, but now I just have brain fog, migraines, and feel like I can barely function.
Any secrets to coming out of the fog? Keep them simple, practical and nothing that I have to go out and buy, because I can't right now.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2006 Location: Michigan
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 4:09pm | IP Logged
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Jenn, I don't have a simple magic bullet. We've been dealing with much of the same here. We do have a new baby in the house, but it goes beyond that. My children are very very tired too. My 5 year old took a nap at 10:30 am!!! We've not been terribly sick, just a cold that won't die.
The only thing that has been getting us by is that when the temp is above, say 25 out side, we go for a short walk or I send the kids out back to run around. In our case I think it is a lack of sunshine.
It couldn't hurt to try some Omega-3's if your not currently taking any.
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 4:15pm | IP Logged
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chicken soup is a good "build up" meal
definately get some sunshine
is there something that you can identify as a trigger for your migraines?
are you getting fruits and veggies?
the omega fats.. 3, 6, 9 are very helpful.
as is a good multi-vitamin
send everyone to bed early?
can dad get up with the little one for a night or two when he doesn't have to be at work the next morning?
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Angel Forum All-Star
Joined: April 22 2006
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 4:21pm | IP Logged
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I take a quick catnap sitting up in the rocking chair when I am nursing my toddler to sleep/sitting with the twins so they'll nap. Is there any time of day you can get maybe 5 or 10 minutes of sleep? Believe it or not, this can help.
Also, are you going to bed around the same time that you put your youngest down? My toddler (who wakes every 2 hrs most nights, and every hour when he's sick) goes to sleep around 9:30. I cannot stay up past 10 on a normal night, or I won't get anywhere near the right amount of sleep. I don't get up until about 7. That way I can get about 7 hrs of sleep, total. If I'm sick, or if the baby is sick, I just go to bed with him.
Of course you may be doing all this already! I wish I had better advice as lack of sleep is so hard to deal with on an extended basis.
__________________ Angela
Mom to 9, 7 boys and 2 girls
Three Plus Two
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aussieannie Forum All-Star
Joined: May 21 2006 Location: Australia
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 4:43pm | IP Logged
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Going into spring at present, so a cup of stinging nettle tea everyday for a month is a good pick-me-up that is recommended in the spring time in particular.
Maria Treben explains here
Have you had any viruses yourself Jenn? You may also have a bit of post viral fatigue..
__________________ Under Her Starry Mantle
Spiritual Motherhood for Priests
Blessed with 3 boys & 3 girls!
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Servant2theKing Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 13 2005
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 4:49pm | IP Logged
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This may sound strange, but have you had a good cry lately? Years ago I heard that tears are beneficial and that letting them flow can actually have a medicinal effect. When I am bone-weary or under stress I often find myself having a good cry (usually in the shower)....afterward I usually feel much better! God has graciously blessed us with free medicine in the gift of tears!
I've also suffered from severe insomnia for several years (since the onset of perimenopause) and can testify firsthand that lack of sleep can greatly contribute to the types of symptoms you're experiencing. I second the advice for catnaps and/or nighttime relief with caring for your sick child, if at all possible! Mothers of young children need benefical sleep to avoid burning themselves out.
A long soak in the tub, or a long shower can also help revitalize when you're exhausted.
Another quirky thing that may be adding to the way you're feeling is unusual weather patterns. This winter we seem to have an awful lot of back and forth weather, alternating between extreme cold, followed by warm fronts. Many of our family seem strongly effected by weather changes, which may be contributing to how you're feeling.
Two of my worst migriane triggers are lack of sleep and weather changes. You can't change it, but sometimes just knowing the cause, and realizing it's temporary, can help lessen the discouragement when you're feeling bad.
May the Lord bless you with sweet relief.
__________________ All for Christ, our Saviour and King, servant
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Maryan Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 5:12pm | IP Logged
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Coffee.
And spring.
And sleep.
Truly, imo you can't replace a good night sleep. And until you get one, brain fog is just part of your existence? Couple that with cloudy and cooped-up weather days... and you have an equation for exhaustion. At least I hope spring cures my disease.
For me, my only coping mechanism is to just recognize my humiliating limitations.
__________________ Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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Maryan Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 5:13pm | IP Logged
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Oh and hugs Jenn. Does your wearniness love company as much as mine does?
__________________ Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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Cay Gibson Forum All-Star
Joined: July 16 2005 Location: Louisiana
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 6:03pm | IP Logged
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Jenn,
I'll keep you in my prayers.
I hit rock bottom after #4 was born and the only thing I recall lots of people advising me to do was to have my tyhroid checked.
My tyhroid is fine but my husband's is out-of-wack. I was shocked at how much this little gland controls our whole body...moods, joints, appetite...the whole enchilada.
__________________ Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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Mackfam Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: Alabama
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 7:05pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Jenn...
**cancel every outside committment...everything that takes you out of the home except Mass.
**the first nap both boys take, get in the shower, turn the water on nice and hot and have a good, long cry.
**get sleep every moment and in every snatch you can, go to bed early, sleep late, cat nap...work to restore some sleep rhythms, but until then don't dare feel guilty about grabbing sleep anytime and anywhere you can get it! Sleep is just that important.
**good nutrition. pay attention. are you nibbling here and there? or are you eating good, balanced meals?
**some kind of multi-vitamin...your prenatals...whatever you've got.
**get outside with the boys. do simple things that remind you how much you love your boys. there's nothing I like more than taking the children outside where there's no pressure from anywhere to be anything except myself with my children in nature.
**once you feel like you have a little sleep under your belt, think of a basic household rhythm and write it down and start to follow it. I mean basic here - no decluttering - just laundry, meals, read-aloud time with the little guys, sleep!
**carve out some creative time in the evening with your husband. this helps me so much. watch a movie together, have a glass of wine together, cry on his shoulder...just spend some time with him and spill out your heart.
So...sleep, simple time spent with your boys (take the pressure off completely - the only curriculum you need right now are great picture books and the great outdoors), simple time spent with your husband, and lots of time spent in prayer.
Sending many prayers and hugs your way, Jenn. Whatever you decide, keep it simple and focus on rebuilding the sleep bank. Spring will bring so many glories with it that I just know it will be a healing balm!
__________________ Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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MarilynW Forum All-Star
Joined: June 28 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 7:11pm | IP Logged
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Dear Jenn
Lots of sympathy - I really think it is lack of sleep coupled with the winter. I am kind of feeling the same - down to the migraines.
My preferred solution - how about a girls' trip to Italy - kind of like Enchanted April - I have been watching that movie - and dreaming of sitting in a comfie chair in the Italian sunshine at a beautiful villa by the sea - just sitting and resting, maybe with a pile of books next to me... any takers (4ladsmom has already signed up...)
ok dreams over - I think sleep, fresh air and sunshine are key..
__________________ Marilyn
Blessed with 6 gifts from God
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Mackfam Board Moderator
Non Nobis
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 7:40pm | IP Logged
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I remembered something else, Jenn...have you had your thyroid checked? Cay mentioned it, and I've been struggling with my thyroid for a year now. It can do a number on hormones and affects sooooo much. Just wanted to throw that out there.
__________________ Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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JennGM Forum Moderator
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 7:49pm | IP Logged
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Thanks, everyone. A lot of what you mention I'm doing. I'm not sure of the trigger for the migraine except perhaps...Lent? It started a few days before. I keep thinking it's the change in diet, but nothing is drastic, because I'm too tired. Detoxing I guess.
Sleep -- any time I can snatch it, which isn't too often. We sleep in, my shower sometimes have to be later in the day just so I can catch some extra Zzzzs. And I've done mandatory quiet/nap time since Lent began so I can just take that little nap.
Need the fresh air, so we'll work on that. Hard to handle the bright sunshine, but I'll try to make it work.
And, my mother also just suggested today I get my thyroid checked, since problems run in the family, so I made the call. I'm just it's just plain ole tiredness, but it's good to get it checked.
Thanks again for the empathy and sympathy. And yes, Maryan, misery does love company, but I keep praying you'll get better soon, as you've had a longer run than I.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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Sarah Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 17 2005 Location: N/A
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Posted: March 05 2009 at 10:30pm | IP Logged
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Maryan is so right, Jenn you can't replace a good nights sleep. This has been such an exhausting year for me. I never get sleep. My toddler wakes constantly and if its not him its a middle of the night delivery for my doc husband, or some other child waking. It really has been hard so I sympathise so much with you.
And, at the risk of being very different in opinion here, I would suggest cutting out or cutting back on exercise. I know it energizes people, but for those of us who get no sleep, I think it can drain us. Well, that's me anyway. I can not exercise right now in my life. I really have no strength to do that and motherhood. Sounds wimpy, maybe. I walk around, but not briskly or anything. Lol.
Here are my survival tips:
1 say no to the run around
2 rest when they rest
3 housework is in survival mode- clean clothes, dishes, bathrooms, and kitchen and bare minimum upkeep
4 go to bed when they do and wake up when they do. Forget trying to jump up early/ stay up late to get something done
5 send dh on errands if he can
Also, lack of sleep can make everything seem darker and more depressing.
Hugs!!
Ps I feel even worse if I do not eat enough. Make sure you're eating frequently. Sometimes I don't even realize its hunger until I remember I was too busy to eat right.
__________________ Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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Carole N. Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 06 2009 at 3:14am | IP Logged
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Jenn, I don't really have a lot of great advice. I think a lot of what the ladies have recommended is really great (and I especially like the dream trip to Italy ). I also go through these times as well. My only tip is to keep your home bright (with all of your windows that should not be a problem) and to put some upbeat music on when you are up and about the home. And I am with Sarah ... no exercise for me when I am that tired other than walks with the family. And remember, you are in my prayers!
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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joann10 Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 06 2009 at 5:58am | IP Logged
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I don't have any other suggesttions. You have received a lot of great advice-but I am offering prayers, and many hugs that you are feeling better soon.
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anitamarie Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 06 2009 at 8:45pm | IP Logged
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Everyone has had such great suggestions. Definitely get your thyroid checked, but also your iron. My thyroid went kafloohy after baby #3, fixed itself and did it again after baby #4, this time, I'm told it'll be forever. 'The last time I had bloodwork done, they also checked my iron. It turned out that I wasn't just getting old, my thyroid was worse and I had become anemic. I just take an iron supplement and they upped my thyroid med and I was a new woman. Prayers for you. Brain fog was gone and I had energy again for my kiddos. Take care of you or you won't be able to take care of anyone else.
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Pilgrim Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 07 2009 at 3:23pm | IP Logged
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I second the suggestion to check your iron. An easy way to see if you may have low iron, is to pull your lower eyelid down, and look in the mirror. It should be pretty red in the bed of it. If it is pale, then your iron is low.
I had a really bad case of low iron at the beginning of this last preg. with the twins, I could barely get up off the couch every day. I read up on it and found out that infection can cause low iron symptoms, because your body "hides" your iron, I think it was because infections grow on iron or bind to the iron and stay in your body longer. Well, whatever the reason was, once I got rid of the infections and upped my iron intake, I felt dramatically better.
I upped the iron in my diet the rest of the preg. making sure not to have milk/calcium around the same time, which binds the iron.
Praying for you, fatigue is so hard to cope with!
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juststartn Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007 Location: Oklahoma
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Posted: March 09 2009 at 12:09am | IP Logged
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I'm exhausted. I am sure you could use some Vit D from the sunshine...I know I could use some more, it would likely help.
If I got a long cry, I'd end up with a headache. I know what the ladies mean though--sometimes you just need a cry. But I always end up with sinus congestion and a headache afterwards--not so much better than when I started out, lol.
I take good vitamins, watch what I eat, take the meds for my PCOS...and I'm wiped out....
I'm hoping that spring will help. The work in the garden, the exercise, etc, well, I am hoping that the combined effect will eventually have a positive result.
Rachel
__________________ Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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Matilda Forum All-Star
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Posted: March 09 2009 at 8:31am | IP Logged
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I hate to suggest something medical because I am ultra sensitive to medical issues but have you asked your doctor to check you for mono? My husband and I both had it in 2005 and in an adult it can last a much longer time than in a teenager. My husband who was prone to migraines before getting mono had lots of them while he was sick with it and we both had mind numbing fatigue and brain fog. There is nothing you can do for it other than rest and time but at least you will have the peace of mind knowing that there is a reason for it. Although, I have to say that we have all been suffering from more headaches this year associated with the weather and little viruses making their way through the family. Hope that helps!
__________________ Charlotte (Matilda)
Mom to four (11, 10, 9 & 5) an even split for now
with bookend boys and a double girl sandwich
Waltzing Matilda
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