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kbfsc
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 2:20pm | IP Logged
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Friends,
I planned this new school year with delight because my little one is ready for Kindergarten and Along the Alphabet Path (from Serendipity). But today I'm reflecting on a less than stellar first week, and I'm looking for wisdom to refocus. And maybe I just need a pep talk. :)
Last year she attended a Christian preK and enjoyed it very much. We discovered that she is an extrovert! She is enthusiastic about people, imaginative play and glitter. But she is a very young K'er (August birthday), and her preK teacher agreed with me that bringing her home would be best. Our schools are rigorous, even for K, and we agreed that she would be discouraged and probably unsuccessful there.
So home she is! I thought Along the Alphabet Path would be a good fit: stories, crafts - her kind of thing - all to introduce letters and mores structured learning concepts. I planned time to work just with her, I put all her stuff in a pretty basket, including the crafty stuff (which is not really my thing...). I also included her in our version of Morning Time and invited her to listen in when the older kids were working on something she could enjoy. But she has not been happy this week.
An added thing on my end is that I have felt very unsuccessful with K for my older children. My first two went to preschool or K and already knew their letters and numbers before I started to teach them to read. My third never went to preschool, and by the time we went through K (twice - he's another late summer birthday) he was not mastering any of the material and we were having serious behavior problems. So, he went to public school for the second half of K - and was reading on a third grade level by May. I feel like I missed something important with him since we had such trouble, but apparently he was very ready to learn. The behavior problems, in retrospect, were at least partly due to boredom. I guess the point is that I don't feel confident with K! And so this is an emotionally charged thing for me. Help!
Any wisdom or thoughts, please??
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Kiera
happy mama of ds '02, dd '03, ds '06, dd '09 and little ones in heaven
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 2:43pm | IP Logged
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I just have my littles play or stay with me (depending on child and personality) and we count (my oldest learned to count by handing me clothespins when we didn't have a dryer) and they help with little things even if it ends up taking me longer. We always make time for LeapFrog orginal Letter Factory.. and when they want school like the big kids we have coloring pages with letters to copy and practice writing. And then we move to Explode the Code.
I would also look at what else she was doing with her day. Perhaps you could add in a story time at the library type of thing? And some other outings maybe going to the post office with you or the grocery store. I'm not sure if you're somewhere your bigger kids can stay home/babysit yet. And going for nature walks even if it's just your back yard or around the block. Oh and read alouds. My little girl loved it when we have our own special book to read out loud. And she was 5ish when we read Little House in the Big Woods. And she loves the American Girl books too. But whatever would be special for her also helps.
She may have found going to school to be very exciting and so staying at home won't feel so exciting and she might just need time to adjust to that fact.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 3:25pm | IP Logged
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Kiera,
What do you mean when you say:
kbfsc wrote:
| But she has not been happy this week. |
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What do you mean?
Is she melting down?
Bored?
Disruptive to others?
Sad and reluctant to do some of the work you had set aside for her?
Becomes frustrated during your lessons?
Wants to do things that are well beyond her capabilities? (Totally normal for a child with older siblings!)
What do you mean by "she hasn't been happy this week?" Knowing that might help us brainstorm a little more specifically.
It looks from your sig line that she's just turned 5, right? She's still really little.
Let's do this, ok? Let's pretend for a minute that we don't have labels anymore...on grade levels I mean. So, if you didn't have a labeled grade level you were thinking about with your daughter, what would you likely be doing with her this year? You would probably just be doing the common sense, very next thing. The very next step forward. She was enjoying imaginative play, spending time with people, and crafting. Rather than squishing her next steps into some generic idea of "Kindergarten," what if we just helped you plan her next steps forward?
Which....in my mind might look something like this:
** Lots of time alongside Mom - tidying, sweeping, helping, counting, singing.
** Some time spent reading together on the couch. No agenda. No workbook. No thoughts of the alphabet. Just reading. Good books. Delightful stories. Together.
** Time for her to play - without you, without play dates, without structure - time to explore, get dirty, build, swim, bike, climb, pick flowers, notice bugs. A time to be in nature and wonder at its beauty. In all the simplest of ways. No agenda - just play.
** Time to work on good habits. Here's where her love of imaginative play comes in to help you. Role play good habits for how to speak to the lady at the grocery store...and then take her to the store to practice. Role play phone manners. Work on the good habit of working quietly for a little bit of time each day. Simple, common sense stuff. But these good habits will lay a foundation for the next steps she takes.
So...in looking at my list, I included:
1) Purposeful work next to/with mom
2) Reading together time - good books, no agenda
3) Playtime (unstructured, free play)
4) Work on good habits
Now, I know you are eager to start working on the alphabet with her, and I don't know if she's ready...or if she isn't, but if you're sensing a general discontent, my first inclination would be to pull back and reconsider what you have planned for the year, or at least how it's presented.
Don't overcomplicate this idea of K! Of COURSE you can handle this age/level at home - and beautifully!!! It's the ideal place! I'm your biggest cheerleader!! But, don't think that the next step, the next thing for your daughter has to fit someone else's idea of age/stage/grade. Let her be exactly where she is and nurture wonder and build good habits! Soooooo much good fruit from that!!!
Give us some specifics on her unhappy first week and we can definitely brainstorm this a little more with you!
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 3:45pm | IP Logged
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You know Jen, I talk about the same ideas but when you say it, it sounds beautiful. 
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 3:56pm | IP Logged
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We're both definitely saying the same thing, Jodie! 
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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kbfsc
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 4:04pm | IP Logged
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Jen and LodieLyn, thank you!
Important question, Jen. When I say she has been unhappy this week, I mean that, after lots of enthusiasm about "school", she has been disinterested in what I have presented to her. She has good fine motor skills but, for example, I find her scribbling when we sit down to draw together. She doesn't seem to enjoy reading very much. (She chose dePaola's The Art Lesson every time we were to read together - a great choice! - and yet, it seemed as if she just grabbed it because she wasn't enticed by her basket of books.) She seems unimpressed... disinterested. And grumpy and less compliant than usual.
JodieLyn, yes, she certainly has an adjustment coming home from preschool - but she's been home since May. Ordinary life in our family.
I know that she is bright and capable. I don't want to push her! So I love your line of thinking, Jen - but I also don't want to not offer her the challenges she is ready for. And the structure and attention she needs. That's what happened to big brother, and I cry and cry about it. So in that respect I realize there is some emotional trigger for me in this, so I must pray about that... and for wisdom. And yet, the concrete! What to do for this little girl?
Thank you all for "listening"!
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Kiera
happy mama of ds '02, dd '03, ds '06, dd '09 and little ones in heaven
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MarilynW
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 7:41pm | IP Logged
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Kiera,
I am about to start K with my 6th. My advice - please don't stress about K or get into oue society's "achiever" mode of focusing on just reading and writing and Math. Not that I am saying these are not important. Just that K is such a wonderful year of wonder and joy.
My dd (5) will have lots of picture books read aloud to her by me. She will also sit in on good books read to older siblings - she loves to do this and will bring out her art supplies and draw whilst she is listening. She will listen to great music (composer study with the older ones and cds of classical music and folk tunes), she plays the piano every day. She will spend time just playing and being and thinking - alone with her toys and with her brothers. She will listen to and memorize poetry. She will join in prayers and devotions and learn them in English and Latin. Much of her program is listening and reciting. She will spend a lot of time outside - on nature walks and in the backyard. She loves nature and drawing what she sees and pressing flowers. She too loves the Tomie de Paola art book and draws her way through the day (though walls and sheets are off limits!!)
There will be some reading and Math and handwriting - 10 minutes of each a day. Phonics and Math with me, handwriting by herself.
We will also be working through virtues and good habits and learning new chores.
Please enjoy K - there is so much time for the kids to learn to read and write and do Math - but K is a time to learn good habits and virtues, to enjoy great stories and good music, to see good art and create as much as possible. To spend as much time outside as possible.
I am copying below one of our homeschool mottos - and for me K is the easiest year to really make this a reality. The quote is by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:
“A man should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day of his life, in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.”
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Marilyn
Blessed with 6 gifts from God
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 9:03pm | IP Logged
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Something else to keep in mind.. well two things really.. but..
One is that sometimes when a child is offered too much choice they may just make the easy choice without it really being what they want. You know your daughter.. you could probably pick out 2 things that she would enjoy and give her just a choice of those 2 things.
And the other is more about how some children develop. They seem to have periods of what are called equilibrium and disequilibrium. not all my children have shown this.. but a couple have been so obviously more difficult and out of sorts always at the same time of year.. that the theory makes sense. How was she last year at about this time of year? You might just have to sorta plow through the grumpy and less compliant for a few months until she's had a bit of developmental change and that may even out. Not that I'm saying you accept unacceptable behavior just that you may find it gets easier for both of you just by getting a few more months under your belt.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Aagot
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| Posted: Aug 22 2014 at 10:22pm | IP Logged
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Kiera,
One thing I did to meet my littlest social needs was to have each older sib do something special with him. One played a game, another read a book, one did a puzzle or "mind benders" etc. One could do a craft or dance to music. But the main thing was that it was a special one on one time.
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4Real Forums : Nurturing the Years of Wonder
Topic: K refocus and pep talk :)
