Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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fsuadamson
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Posted: Dec 29 2006 at 10:01am | IP Logged Quote fsuadamson

I was wondering how in the world do you handle extra curricular activities in a large family?

When we lived in Florida we really had it made because through the Parks and Rec departments activities were made so affordable for families and the quality really wasn't too bad. We really believe in team sports both competitive and non-competitive. Unfortunately here in Georgia the Parks and Rec are not family friendly, neither is the YMCA and the individual "homeschool athletic organizations" are quite costly.

Each of the children have different interests and we would really like for them to explore these but if I were to take just four of them (two more down the road) right now and pay for each individual it would not only be quite expensive but I don't want to spend my life in the transportation business .

How do you come to a compromise with multitude of interests, seasonal activities and costs?

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Martha
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Posted: Dec 29 2006 at 10:18am | IP Logged Quote Martha

Personally, I refuse to do it. I call it the extra-curriculiar circus.

However, we do get out about 3 times a week as a family or at least most of the kids together in something. I'm thinking swimming next year...

Elizabeth does this though and doesn't consider it "extra" in her home for various reasons and discusses it in her book very well.

Which reminds me of somethng else I need to check out with her....

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Erin
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Posted: Dec 29 2006 at 3:06pm | IP Logged Quote Erin

Leslie

I've been blessed so far in that my dc tend to pick the same sports (I've ahh encouraged that) however I can see as they get older that some are starting to be interested in different things. Not too sure how I'm going to handle that but I know I can't but ds9 off choosing cricket for too much longer.

I'm not too sure what you consider expensive, soccer I find reasonable although it adds up when you have five playing. Swimm squad is very expensive but they did give me a massive deduction. And I'm extremely happy with the quality.

You're new situation does sound difficult. Could you focus on just two dc at a time and then the next season another two? Not the best for those waiting I know but it may be a way around it Could dc re-consider some of their choices, choosing some sports that they do together? Have you exhausted all avenues? What interests are all talking? Is it all sports or creative arts as well?

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Posted: Dec 29 2006 at 3:27pm | IP Logged Quote JenniferS

We limit them to one activity per season, but our rec department(except for the swimming--it's set up for families of four or less on their season pass) is very family friendly. The only time we make an exception to the one activity rule is during the summer, when we make them take swimming lessons, and they can play tennis, baseball, or softball, too. I guess I don't count music lessons as an extra-curricular because we don't figure violin or piano lessons in that one activity per child. And one of my sons only likes tee ball, so he only has an activity during that season.
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Joelle
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Posted: Dec 31 2006 at 12:39pm | IP Logged Quote Joelle

We do the swimming thing too. Check your local public schools. My oldest 2 belong to the Swim Club at the high school, which is through Community Ed. Really, it costs $60 per child and they swim Oct-Feb. That's the cost of a 2 week swim class in the summer here! They have meets (but don't stress competition) and the big benefit is they learn all four strokes at a young age and because of the practices (3X week, but again they tell the kids they want them to enjoy it, so if they cannot make 3 days, only come 2), they have become very strong swimmers. They also teach water safety (ie just because you are a swimmer, doesn't mean you take risks, etc.). The other nice thing is that the coach is open to allowing them to practice with different age groups, so their practice time is at the same time or back to back. I also wait until they are old enough to be able to allow them to go to practice w/o me as if I had to sit for 2 hours at the pool with my babies and toddlers, I would lose my mind!! I've tried this, and it's not good! However, it works out that friends of ours have 2 kids that swim at the same time as mine and she stays at the poos and reads a book (what must that be like?? ). Anyhow, she keeps an eye on mine and I come help with the pick up and it works out well. They also have a 2 month summer session, which is smaller and the kids really get individual attention from the coaches. AND the coach never minds when I'm pregnant again--he says "I love it! Another one for the swim team!" God bless him--at least it's not "are you nuts?" which is most everyone else's comment. Anyhow, the swim thing works well for us and it was a lot cheaper than at the Y or other homeschool swim classes that only met once/week.

God Bless, Joelle (mom of 5: 10,6,4,2,1 & baby due 07/07)
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Posted: Dec 31 2006 at 9:16pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmyown

We are a baseball family. For now, anyway. My oldest three play, two boys and a girl. Some seasons we have three teams, my husband coaches at least one, sits on the board and is in charge of all the umpires. It does consume us during the Spring and Fall.

But then I have four little girls in a row. I am thinking we will end up in some kind of dance or gymnastics classes. So much for my dh's dream of a baseball dynasty.

I just do it. My mom did it for all seven us growing up, soccer, basketball, swimming. I think it is a healthy part of life. It can get crazy and it isn't for everyone, but it is something we do together.

I can't do the swimming because we are not morning people.

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Joelle
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Posted: Jan 01 2007 at 10:13pm | IP Logged Quote Joelle

I'll try this post again, I posted once and it disappeared...

If you are conisdering swimming, you may want to look at your public school's community education programs.
My oldest two are members of the Aquatic Club at the local public school. Not the swimming lessons, they are more expensive ($50 for a two-week course here and at local pools in the summer). We pay $60/kid and they swim from October-February and there is a $30 stroke clinic in May (3X/week for 3 or 4 weeks), then the summer season in June & July for something like $40. Each season holds practices (by age group) 3X week and the kids learn how to correctly swim all four strokes and my children have become incredibly strong swimmers in a short period of time. Here are the extras - 1) They work with families--if 3X/week is too much, then only come twice. 2) If you have children in different age groups, they let the young one swim up (if it doesn't knock them out--or let you put them back to back age groups) 3) Cost, mentioned above 4) Swim meets are encouraged, but optional and they do not stress competition with others, but chart each child's progress from meet to meet. 5) I don't have to bring toddlers & babies to the pool as I have met families whose moms stay and read during practice (what must that be like??? ) and they have my number and keep an eye on my swimmers and FINALLY 6) the coach never makes rude comments when I walk in pregnant every other season--he just says "YES! More swimmers for the team!! (God bless him!) Well, that's our plug for swimming.
I also allow my girls (6 & 4) to take ballet) and my 10 yo boy in scouts, but those activities will be bumped if we are swamped--also, swimming & ballet are each 5 minutes from our house, so that helps.

God Bless, Joelle
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Joelle
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Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 9:35am | IP Logged Quote Joelle

Oh there my first post is, well 2 plugs for swimming I guess !
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fsuadamson
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Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 11:46am | IP Logged Quote fsuadamson

Martha wrote:
Elizabeth does this though and doesn't consider it "extra" in her home for various reasons and discusses it in her book very well.



I happen to agree with Elizabeth's approach 100% for both my husband and I were very active in sports growing up and we reaped many of the benefits that she speaks about in her book. It's just that both my husband and I don't remember these activities being so expensive I mean back in our days, we didn't have to pay for uniforms in addition to a family plus individual membership, plus application fee, plus trophy fees? Uniforms were recycled except for helmets and bats.

I am going to look into the suggestions for swimming again and see if I can't find something like Joelle spoke about.

I guess we are just going to have to re-evaluate our "curriculum budget" each year to start including a seasonal sporting event. I just haven't worked it all out in my mind (or on paper for that matter) to see if we can make this work and still meet the needs of everyone in the family.

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Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 11:53am | IP Logged Quote Martha

fsuadamson wrote:
Martha wrote:
Elizabeth does this though and doesn't consider it "extra" in her home for various reasons and discusses it in her book very well.


I happen to agree with Elizabeth's approach 100% for both my husband and I were very active in sports growing up and we reaped many of the benefits that she speaks about in her book.


I have nothing against others who feel a need to do it, but I don't believe it is neccessary for everyone or every family. My dh was very active in sports growing up and still loves sports, but thinks there's nothing wrong with not doing any of it.

That said, I think every kid should learn to swim. It's just a basic safety thing if nothing else.

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Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 12:48pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

We do swimming, outdoor pool, so it's only late June to mid-August (the lifeguards are mostly college and high school kids so summer break is when it's open). My older ones do swim team. They have to be 5yr or older for that. 4yr+ for swim lessons. We do hang around for it and yes it's pretty much our whole morning for 6 weeks 5 days a week during the summer. Family pass doesn't have a people limit. And cost of swim team works out to about the same as swim lessons. We just put aside the money from tax returns. The tennis court is right there next to the pool. So I allow the kids to pay for their own tennis lessons (they get birthday money they can save to do this)as long as it's during the time we're there for swimming anyway.

We did do soccer this past fall. The kids all liked it and I actually enjoyed watching them. I had to look up the basic rules online ;) this is my dh's "thing".

We're looking at something for this spring.

Basically, the kids deal with the fact that we can not and will not do *everything* and that to do *some* things they just have to do them together.

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Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 6:34pm | IP Logged Quote ALmom

For us the extracurricular are on a case by case prayerful discernment basis. We look at the benefits, what is available within our community, the costs, time committments, the needs of the particular child, how the activity will impact the entire family in terms of in and out, mealtimes, time away from home, budget, Then we discuss with the child to gain an idea of their reasons for wanting this, and discusss privately between spouses what we see as needs/benefits and pray some more. We are slow to say yes, but will make significant sacrifices if it is something that fulfills a serious need that we have not been able to fulfill in the home or if we find a way to make the impact minimal. I do not want to be sucked into the "my children are deprived if we do not do .... endless activities syndrome". Nor do I want to ignore legitimate and necessary opportunities for our children to begin to mingle in the wider world under supervised and focused means that might meet real needs. It is important for us to have a family life, to eat meals together, etc. It is also hard to make statements across the board like organized athletics are essential to proper formation. One community's organized athletics may have too many negatives to compensate for the positives (cursing coaches, players that talk s* talk in the dugout, poor sportsmanship, no real fostering of skill levels as the team is more a collection of the coaches sons best buddies and the occassional poor soul they were forced to accept, etc., etc.) or it may be a wonderful opportunity to learn under a fantastic male role model, learn teamwork, perfect skills that your household is unable to teach and the program might be set up so that all the children have something to look forward to (maybe the family loves watching the sport and it becomes a family affair). These evaluations will be different for each family. The basic principles of what is positive and what is negative is consistent, the prayerful discernment is the operation of the virtue of prudence. If we must say No, we attempt to explain why and also to find alternative ways to meet the needs/desires expressed by the child. If a child just needs physical exercise on a regular basis or some opportunity for more training than we can provide, but organized sports are too organized for us, we may look for a more informal, less time demanding way to meet the need (regularly scheduled Sat. afternoon kickball game between two families). I would go nuts if we had a policy of 1 activity per child or 1 activity per/child/season.   As things turned out in our family, some of our children did more outside activities than others but all are happy with our balance - on the outside we may appear unfair, but each child has their real needs met and our family stays a sane one.

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