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KellyJ
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My family's size doesn't qualify for this forum yet. Still, the children are so loud (I thrive on peace and quiet). Yes, we have quiet times, and they are regularly reminded to keep the noise level down at various times. I don't expect silence; but, it is really too much in my opinion, both the loudness of the noise and the frequency -- seems constant till they go to sleep.
Maybe it is excessive, or maybe I'm too sensitive to it. Maybe it is a combination.
I imagine it will get better, at least by the time they've moved out of the house. 
Are your children constant-loud-noise-makers too? Just some of them? None of them? How do you survive the noise? Or do you revel in it?
Help! Please! But reply softly, please? 
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Patty LeVasseur
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Kelly,
Yes, my children are loud. Just yesterday I told them they sound like a herd of elephants. They make noise playing, talking, and arguing. If the noise is from playing I try to get them to "take it outside". If it is from talking (I have one son whose normal talking voice is quite loud) I remind them to use their "inside voices". And if it is from arguing I either try to ignore it if it seems like the argument might be getting somewhere, or I step in and break it up if it has broken down to "You are a pig-faced monkey head." From my experience, I also think that boys tend to be louder than girls, but girls can make noise in octaves that can rattle your brain.
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Martha
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YES!!!!
2 things...
1 - when you have fewer you can "let lose" a bit more with less risk.
2 - when you have more you crack down quicker because things can get out of hand quicker.
So, it evens out as you have them.
I too am a person who craves order and peace and serenity. I have found to order my days around this need and be consistant with it helps me cope greatly. Otherwise I feel overwhelmed and brain fried. 
Getting up before the kids when possible so I don't start out in hyper mode helps. That nice serene cup of coffe in the pre-dawn hours curled in the recliner with de Sales and a quiet word or two dh before he leaves for work. It's been a long time since I had that due to little Bridget keeping me up. I really miss it.
Also, my dh has always been rather rigid on the no later than 8pm bedtime. He is desperate for a moment of uniterrupted time with me. WE haven't had this in some time either. Partly because he's been working late and my in-laws gave us a tv and entertainment center fo the living room. (I'd love to take a bat to that thing!  ) I'm going to have to talk to him about this. We both need to refocus and unwind in the evening and tv just doesn't do it. 
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Mary G
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OH YEAH!
But then I come from a loud family too, so it wasn't much of a problem for me, but dh is from a very quiet, hold-it-all-in type of family so it can get a bit much for him sometimes. 
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Nina Murphy
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Loud, loud, loud (except for Kate---I don't know where she came from and Nicholas, as he has gotten older and more introverted, but as a child....oh boy). They take after their LOUD father. I am always shushing everyone which only makes it worse.
I LOVE quiet---I LONG for it. Growing up in my home, things were so controlled, so perfectly clean, so perfectly quiet. We three kids always just went off to our own rooms--- when we were home. My mother just can not understand it, how I can choose to live in so much stress.
I wish I had grown up in a large family, as you can see, or that my husband had. We would be better aclimated to what to expect as normal, I think. My friends from larger families seem to handle the stress better of this life of many people always at home, always making noise and mess! What do you all think?
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JodieLyn
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just a bit
In some ways I just let it wash over me... hmmm lik esomeone who operates loud equipment will just "get used to it".. oh and that means as long as the noise level is a "dull roar" and it's not tweedle beetle battles.. I don't pay attention to the actual content all the time. Paying attention to what all the noise is makes it harder to reduce it's impact.. makes it more disturbing etc.
I will turn off music, keep out exceptionally noisy toys, send kids to rooms and outside for their play etc.
Part of it here though is just that it's a small house.. and noises are louder/closer than in larger spaces.
Oh and at least one of my children got my mother's voice. It's not that she's loud, it's that her voice even at normal conversation levels carries and penetrates.
And I make sure that I give myself breaks for quiet.. that I don't have the radio or tv on when the kids are outside/quiet and such.
But you'll hear me coming down the grocery store aisles.. with 6 kids chattering and helping and "playing games". One of my favorite memories of them being good but loud in the store was at the grocery store with the extra seat carts.. 3 kids in the cart, 3 hanging onto it in various places.. and they decided we were a boat.. and so you had chatter and "bells" and "horns" and "all aboard" and whatnot as we went down the aisle
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hylabrook1
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I sometimes yell out , "Stop the gratuitous noise!" and of course my yelling has just been a significant contribution to that same *gratuitous noise"!
I guess the noise I really mind is the noise that is really serving no other purpose. There are certainly times when I will tell everyone directly that I need some peace and quiet, and then they do a pretty good job of finding something to do more quietly. If I realize that they are being noisy as an energy release, I'll send them outside or on a bike ride, or even to the basement. Sometimes I'll be the one to leave the room where they are being noisy, maybe to go up to my room and read for 15 minutes or so.
Peace,
Nancy
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Cheryl
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My dc seem very loud. I love quiet. Right now it's quiet time. The dc go in separate rooms for 1 hour. I'm nursing the baby. I can hear the faint humming of ds 5 upstairs. I don't think it's possible for him to be completely quiet unless he's asleep. Ds 7 is the quietest, although he can be loud when he's silly and when he's in the van yelling at the others to be quiet. Dd 4 talks very loudly and sings....she's adorable, but when I'm tired it can get quite annoying, especially when the talking is combined with constant touching. Our new house is large and it still echoes because we need curtains, carpets, pictures, etc. When dh talks to me from another room, I can rarely hear him if I am in a room with dc in it and vice versa. We just say, forget it, I'll talk to you later. Later being, when the dc are asleep.
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Jess
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Oh my children are very loud. Especially my son. He talks very loud and I have to tell him sometimes not to yell because we are all right here in the same room/car/universe With the new baby coming I have been trying to tell them to not yell to each other from room to room and try to be quiet sometimes. I am going to get a little floor fan to put next to the crib just for the noise. I want the baby to be able to sleep through noise, but not have the wits scared out of him/her when someone comes shrieking into the room. We also don't have a very big house and are all on one floor with hard floors through most of the house, so it does seem a little bit louder.
God bless,
Jess
+JMJ+
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Mrs.K
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Patty wrote: '"You are a pig-faced monkey head." From my experience, I also think that boys tend to be louder than girls, but girls can make noise in octaves that can rattle your brain.'
Oh, Patty, thank you for the laugh! I'm standing here at the computer with Martin Doman blaring trying to calm my unconsolable baby and that just cracked me up! Very loudly, too. I have 5dd - maybe that explains why my brain is rattled.
With seven dc it can certainly get very loud around here. But as others have said, there's a time when noise is tolerated and time when it's quiet, like when baby and/or toddler is sleeping, or it's school time everyone knows to be quiet. Then we have soothing harp music on the CD player and it's very peaceful.
But when it's recess time, they (ie. my girls) start screaming as soon as they get over the threshold out the door. Right now everyone is into playing The Sound of Music, so there is lots of stomping and the boys' bosun's whistles blasting and my six year old dd who can shrilly sound like the Captain even without any whistle... So there are times we do revel in it and times we can't wait until they're all asleep so dh and I can think long enough to make a sentence.
But just think how quiet an empty nest will be...
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amyable
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Nina Murphy wrote:
I LOVE quiet---I LONG for it. Growing up in my home, things were so controlled, so perfectly clean, so perfectly quiet. We three kids always just went off to our own rooms--- when we were home. My mother just can not understand it, how I can choose to live in so much stress.
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Nina, I could have written your post word for word, except that there were only two of us growing up, me and a boy six years older. Almost every aspect of my life was completely different than what I'm living, and honestly, lately I'm having trouble dealing!
I was talking to my dh just the other day about this - he is the youngest of 4 kids, so he's always had a family like ours. He has the memories of what his mom would say or do to manage everything. I don't have that so every day, every moment is me hoping I can just pull ideas out of thin air on how to deal with the kids/house. Hard. I'm sure you understand!
On the loudness scale, my kids are probably moderately loud, and especially the younger two have shrieks that could set alarms off down the street. Our problem is that they all never stop talking, especially my extraverted/impulsive oldest that will just think out loud all day long, and when she is not doing that she is singing or making nonsense noise (I thought only boys were supposed to vroom vroom cars around all day long ). Being the oldest, all the others follow her lead!  Me on the other hand, I would be happy as a cloistered nun, or a hermit.
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Alcat
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ALL children are loud
The sad thing is, no matter where they fall on the loudness scale, their noise is still gonna drive you nuts
Sometimes when I notice they volume going crazy, I send them down to play and be loud in their bedrooms
They are ALL SCREAMING right now , OK toddler girl was jumping up and down on the top bunk so everybody scream!
When things get real noisy I send them outside or have them play hide and go seek inside.
My girls are just as loud, if not louder than the boys because they have learned the fine art of high-pitched screaming. A friends dd taught them this neat trick, now they have brought along their brother (4yrs) into the fun I hates it!!!
My oldest is a talker (don't know where he gets that from ha, ha). That is harder for me to deal with, because I get so wrapped up in my own thoughts 
good luck
Alison
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KC in TX
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Mine are loud too. It drives my family nuts. I try not to mind it too much, but it can get pretty bad. My son (HF autistic) doesn't often realize he's being loud so I just tell him to turn the volume down. Works wonders (for a minute or two ).
I just wanted to let you know, you're not alone.
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teachingmom
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I have been having a problem with the level of noise around here for the first time this school year. It's not that any of the girls are particularly loud, it's just that they can't seem to stop talking to each other during our school hours! They chatter on and on about just about anything that pops into their heads and the work takes forever. A few of the girls are still working on their lessons after the neighboring school kids get home each afternoon.
It became apparent who the real chatterboxes are recently. My 7th grader and 3rd grader are taking piano lessons for the first time. The teacher is a few minutes away right in our neighborhood, so I drop them off at 11:30 and pick them both up an hour later. Each does some schoolwork during the half hour of the other one's lesson.
I couldn't believe how quiet the house was during that hour the first week they went to lessons! My 5th grader and 1st grader keep themselves occupied with quiet schoolwork during the entire time. And my 3yo can come to me with books to read or just occupy herself with her dolls up in her room. It's a great opportunity to have my 1st grader read out loud to me because there is no talking going on in the background!
Up until now, I hadn't really pinpointed who the real distractions were. Both of these dd's do tend to be more talkative, but since they start conversations with the quieter sisters, it was harder to tell which one needed to be corrected for all the discussions that were keeping them from their lessons.
Now I've found that I have to clamp down on talking during school hours. I also send them away to quieter areas of the house to do things like math, once I've spent time with them going over new concepts. You would think I was punishing them when I send them away! But the math gets completed much more quickly if I enforce alone time.
My 10 yo dd is fascinated with my book, The Temperament God Gave You. She asked me recently if I am an extravert or introvert. I told her that I am an extravert by nature. Later, I had to admit to myself that I tend to come across as an introvert to the children because of the coping mechanisms I use to handle all the chatter from a house full of girls!
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Sarah
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YES!
I long for silence sometimes.
Its especially hard to read over their voices so everyone can hear.
I finally told them when I reading a story, they have to whisper.
I also told them they just have to be silent when people are working at their desks/reading.
It seems like common courtesy to be silent sometimes.
It also seems that as parents one skill we need to teach them is to look around at others and see if this is a time to keep their mouths shut, afterall, we don't want our children to be those despised people who are loud and inappropriate at funerals, in the library, in church, etc.
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Patty LeVasseur
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teachingmom wrote:
It became apparent who the real chatterboxes are recently. My 7th grader and 3rd grader are taking piano lessons for the first time.
I couldn't believe how quiet the house was during that hour the first week they went to lessons! |
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I remember one time my husband took my second son somewhere and I was shocked at how quiet the house was and how much schoolwork we got done. This son is very extroverted so I was sure he was my problem for all that talking during schoolwork.
Then about a month later my husband took my first son somewhere and I was shocked at how quiet the house was and how much schoolwork we got done. This son is very introverted so now I'm not so sure what is going on.
I would be interested to know if you notice the same calm if different of your children are off doing something.
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Bookswithtea
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My house is sooooooo loud, and I have sensitive ears. I can only stand so much noise before I start to get really cranky.
One thing I have done recently is to just be honest with them all, "OK...I need y'all to ALL go downstairs and play while I take 15 minutes to get dinner on the table. Mommy's ears hurt and she needs a few minutes of quiet." It helps.
Now, if someone can give me some advice on how to get my teen to stop drumming on everything in the house without screaming, "STOP DRUMMING!!!" I'd be immensely grateful.
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Maddie
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I just wanted to toss out one thing I've noticed about my high decibel household. We have 7 children and every baby from #3 on down can not nap quietly in a bedroom. It seems everytime I get the little munchkin to sleep and gently lay him/ her down they wake up, but! Put them smack in the middle of all the action during the day, they sleep, well, like a baby!
Helpful to know I'm not the only one questioning what is "normal". My biggest issue with the level of noise is when it's all directed at me in the form of a question or when everyone wants to share his take on something exciting that happened.
Maybe that's another topic all together though.
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MarieC
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Patty LeVasseur wrote:
I would be interested to know if you notice the same calm if different of your children are off doing something.
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Yes! We were just talking about this. My oldest...who is the quietest was gone recently and I couldn't get over the quiet. It's always quieter when someone is gone, or even when the usual pairings get mixed up.
My husband swears that me being in the room raises the noise level...not b/c I'm making noise but because the energy level goes up when I'm around.
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JodieLyn
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Books - how about getting him drum sticks and a practise pad and having a set place for it to be.. when he starts elsewhere.. send him to the practise pad to drum. Let's him drum but lets you control where.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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Topic: Are your children loud?
