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SeaStar
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I just read a a piece written by a man who used to run and train for marathons but gave it up. He enjoyed it and felt it was a great stress reliever, but eventually he began to reevaluate how he used his time and stopped.
He realized that he could stay pretty much as fit as he needed to by walking daily with a family member, which gave him the double bonus of staying healthy in far less time and staying in better touch with his wife and kids.
He summed up his marathon running by saying: what a waste of time.
Now, I'm NOT picking on marathon runners, but his point really struck home with me. I feel there are many areas in my life where this idea applies.
I often finding myself running around, always in a hurry, even eating fast at the table! And what has happened to reading books (for myself?). I used to love that, but now I catch myself trying to speed read or even peaking ahead at the ending or skimming over parts. Why?
Time robbers. For me the big two are:
Computer time: because really I could accomplish as much in far less on line time.
And: Lack of planning(for things besides school): ever have those days when you have free time but can't remember what you wanted to do and so nothing gets done? Check.
I'm working on these, and I'm startled to discover that as a busy homeschool mom, I am wasting *a lot* of time each day. I'm guilty. The time pressure and stress I feel some days can be tied directly to that.
So. Time to go back to the drawing board and revise and taken a second look at several areas.
Any one else have time robbers? What are yours?
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
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JodieLyn
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My biggest time robber is feeling overwhelmed so that I do nothing rather than try an figure it out.. not sure how to fix that but identifying it helps.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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SeaStar
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| Posted: April 15 2013 at 7:39pm | IP Logged
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Goodness! I did not know about the Boston Marathon before posting this. 
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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stellamaris
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It's OK, Melinda. You make a very good point about time robbers, and especially at times like this when we are face-to-face with how precious life is and really how short our time is on this earth, it is good to consider how we might spend our time more wisely.
My biggest time robbers are probably the computer (just googling around, though I'm really trying to stay off of it a lot lately--why I haven't been posting hardly at all  ) and, like Jodie, a tendency to "dither". This is a new problem for me since going through menopause, but I can't seem to focus on one thing at a time, so I bounce from one thing to another  . I've been making an effort to complete each task and it seems to be restoring my sanity some.
Making certain things a priority every day is a huge help for me: the Divine Office and sitting down to each meal with my family are top priorities that help order my day.
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Caroline
Wife to  dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
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pumpkinmom
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JodieLyn wrote:
| My biggest time robber is feeling overwhelmed so that I do nothing rather than try an figure it out.. not sure how to fix that but identifying it helps. |
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This has been me too for the past year. I don't know why I feel so overwhelmed, but maybe it's just a fact of getting older. I actually have more time since my boys are older and can do for themselves. Combine this with a very busy dh, and I tend to get bored and I find myself on the internet a lot more than I need to be.
I've tried to stay off the internet during certain times. My goal is to stay off during school hours (except a quick check at lunch break) and in the evenings when we are all home.
Chores are a huge time robber for me.  Seriously, I'm just slow! I've been training my boys on new chores and set up a new chore list. With more of their help I will be freeing up some more time.
I'll be following this post!
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Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
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SeaStar
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| Posted: April 16 2013 at 11:20am | IP Logged
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I have also fallen prey to dithering.
However, my dh has helped me solve this problem with a "one at a time"
approach.
I get really overwhelmed sometimes at all the stuff that piles up on my desk, for example, so I have learned to tackle it one item at a time. Literally.
I will pick up one piece of paper and decide what to do with it before looking at anything else. If it needs to be put away upstairs, I will walk that one sheet of paper up the stairs and take care of it before I look at the next item.
This is a slow method, but it keeps me from feeling so overwhelmed I can't even begin to work. Also, it keeps me from merely shuffling piles of stuff around, another huge time robber.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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Betsy
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Melinda, when I read the title of your post I immdiately though of this prayer by St. Theresa of Avila. A bit off topic, or maybe not?? 
A Prayer to Redeem Lost Time
O My God! Source of all mercy! I acknowledge Your sovereign power. While recalling the wasted years that are past, I believe that You, Lord, can in an instant turn this loss to gain. Miserable as I am, yet I firmly believe that You can do all things. Please restore to me the time lost, giving me Your grace, both now and in the future, that I may appear before You in "wedding garments." Amen.
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When handcrafting my work, I always pray that it will raise your heart to all that is true, modest, just, holy, lovely and good fame!
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CatholicMommy
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Yep. One thing at a time... adds a LOT of time up-front, but in the end, things get DONE and I actually ENJOY some free time :)
Now if meals and such would just stop getting in the way ;)
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knowloveserve
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I think, we as a culture, are feeling more frenzied and rushed than ever due in large part to technology. I'm not a Luddite but the very things that promise to make our lives easier often contribute to a sense of always being in a hurry.
Facebook news feeds. If you don't check in, you miss out on things.
Smartphones: economize time by checking emails while at the park with kids.
Pinterest: plan your dream life, meals, crafts and schooling without doing a thing other than clicking.
Twitter: broadcast your feelings before you've barely had time to name them much less ruminate about them.
(I have an iPad, blog and am on Pinterest so these thoughts aren't meant as condemning one to everyone else. The problem is in me too...)
What is traditionally leisure time where our overstimulated brains can rest, is now filled with urgencies.
Online everything is just a click away, massive, endless amounts of inspiration or information... but our brains are LITERALLY changing the way we process information now. (read the brilliant book The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brain) We don't read articles... we scan them looking for trigger words. Hyperlinks distract us. I never had a focus problem in my life until very recently. I feel like I'm putting out fires all day long sometimes and I know this is because of time wasted online or having to deal with emails and texts. It is a time suck. It is the mode on which our world operates and one I am bitter towards in some ways.
Everything is urgent now. The very big problem is that we spend so much time dealing with what is "urgent" now that we all but ignore what is "important"... those two things are often mutually exclusive.
This is a pet topic of mine, sorry. The demise of what is real and simple and slow in our fast-paced world...
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stacykay
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I would agree with you all about computer time! I fall prey to on-line "rabbit trails!"
Like Caroline mentioned, I also am fighting the "dithering" that has popped up with the changes in hormones! I find I have to write down everything I need to do, just to stay focused.
In looking at my lack of time to get my neccesary work accomplished, about a year or so ago, I found another time-robber, for me, was books!  Many friends would suggest "good" Christian books for me to read. Mostly the romance novel sort. For me, even though these books were clean, I found them to be more like written soap operas. I LOVE to read, but I also decided I needed to be way more discerning in what I pick up.
Out of all the time-robbers I've battled, the biggest one for me is the phone! For years, I would pick up the phone, and then feel stuck, listening to a friend's latest tale of woe or whatever. We didn't have caller ID until the past few years, and while my parents were still living, but battling various illnesses, I just couldn't "let the phone ring," in fear that I might miss a very important call. I now utilize the caller ID all of the time. I can see if it is dh or one of my boys who are out and about, or if it is a sale's call, or that friend who just loves to talk. I can pick up or not. I can call friends back when I have time. And I don't mean to sound heartless about friends' calls. Unfortunately, previous years' phone conversations came at the expense of my own dc.   I love to be there for my friends, and I make sure I call them back, but I no longer allow myself to sit on the phone when my own dc need me.
Betsy, thank you for writing out that prayer. I have it printed out and in my prayer journal!
In Christ,
Stacy in MI
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SeaStar
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knowloveserve wrote:
I think, we as a culture, are feeling more frenzied and rushed than ever due in large part to technology. I'm not a Luddite but the very things that promise to make our lives easier often contribute to a sense of always being in a hurry.
Facebook news feeds. If you don't check in, you miss out on things.
Smartphones: economize time by checking emails while at the park with kids.
Pinterest: plan your dream life, meals, crafts and schooling without doing a thing other than clicking.
Twitter: broadcast your feelings before you've barely had time to name them much less ruminate about them.
(I have an iPad, blog and am on Pinterest so these thoughts aren't meant as condemning one to everyone else. The problem is in me too...)
What is traditionally leisure time where our overstimulated brains can rest, is now filled with urgencies.
Online everything is just a click away, massive, endless amounts of inspiration or information... but our brains are LITERALLY changing the way we process information now. (read the brilliant book The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brain) We don't read articles... we scan them looking for trigger words. Hyperlinks distract us. I never had a focus problem in my life until very recently. I feel like I'm putting out fires all day long sometimes and I know this is because of time wasted online or having to deal with emails and texts. It is a time suck. It is the mode on which our world operates and one I am bitter towards in some ways.
Everything is urgent now. The very big problem is that we spend so much time dealing with what is "urgent" now that we all but ignore what is "important"... those two things are often mutually exclusive.
This is a pet topic of mine, sorry. The demise of what is real and simple and slow in our fast-paced world... |
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I feel much the same way... like I am on an information treadmill and have to sprint all the time to just keep up. And that does make me really, really sad.
I think so much joy has gone out of our lives with the advent of technology. Looking at Pinterest or FB or Instagrams can make you feel really down on yourself if you can't keep a firm grasp on the fact that no on is putting their failed attempts or disasters out there for everyone to see. And we all have them.
So I can shake that off somewhat. But I hate to walk past kids at the bus stop in the mornings and see them all, face down, texting. No one is talking to each other.
In my own home we have one TV, no cable, no video games.
So you can believe me that NO ONE ever wants my family to host Thanksgiving or Christmas... no cable, no football, etc. We are boring.
So, technology is not just stealing our time, it is robbing us of each other. Seriously.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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Betsy
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stacykay wrote:
Betsy, thank you for writing out that prayer. I have it printed out and in my prayer journal!
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I am glad that it helped Stacy. It's definitely an interesting prayer to meditate on!
SeaStar wrote:
| So, technology is not just stealing our time, it is robbing us of each other. Seriously. |
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Melinda, you are so right! It's not just the time, but it's destroying relationships!
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When handcrafting my work, I always pray that it will raise your heart to all that is true, modest, just, holy, lovely and good fame!
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Angie Mc
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Single task.
Background tasks.
Schedule weekly family meeting.
Use a time management system. We use Gmail + Evernote + Google calendar + Google docs
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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SallyT
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Yes to overwhelmed, and yes to the lure of the internet. I was just talking to my confessor about this yesterday, in fact -- how I get on the wagon of self-discipline and then fall off again, and my days go to pieces in all-too-often sort of useless ways. Not that I don't accomplish good things -- the kids are getting educated, we don't miss meals, and we make it to Mass -- but things I really need to do don't get done.
When I can make myself use the Self-Control app on the computer, I find that that really helps me with the "Oh, I've got a minute, let's see what's happening on Facebook" impulse. At times I've blocked other things, including 4Real, which can become my alter-FB if I'm not careful! I find I really need a LOCK on temptations, and that when I make myself use it, I also use my time better.
But meanwhile, I still have the tendency, when there's a lot on my plate, to feel helpless before it all and just shut down, or turn to other piddly avoidance activities so that I don't have to confront the things that really need doing. WHY I can't turn one necessary thing into a piddly avoidance activity for all the rest, and then the next necessary thing, I don't know! But if I could trick myself that way, it would be a good thing.
Sally
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Angie Mc
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I just realized I didn't add what my time wasters are...
Not going to sleep on time.
Not making decisions quickly and decisively enough.
Agonizing over details. Or things I don't control
But I do a lot of things that may look like time wasters - being online, watching The Voice, following baseball...
But these things are part of the fuel that make me run! I definitely overdue sometimes, but in the big picture, I mostly gain from the down time and or the service, kindnesses I'm offering others. At least, that's what I hope!
I do ask my husband to keep an eye on me - which helps me to not feel the need to be perfect in this very mysterious "how much is too much?" area of life.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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JodieLyn
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SeaStar wrote:
I feel much the same way... like I am on an information treadmill and have to sprint all the time to just keep up. And that does make me really, really sad.
I think so much joy has gone out of our lives with the advent of technology. Looking at Pinterest or FB or Instagrams can make you feel really down on yourself if you can't keep a firm grasp on the fact that no on is putting their failed attempts or disasters out there for everyone to see. And we all have them.
So I can shake that off somewhat. But I hate to walk past kids at the bus stop in the mornings and see them all, face down, texting. No one is talking to each other.
In my own home we have one TV, no cable, no video games.
So you can believe me that NO ONE ever wants my family to host Thanksgiving or Christmas... no cable, no football, etc. We are boring.
So, technology is not just stealing our time, it is robbing us of each other. Seriously. |
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Oh this reminds me of my favorite Lewis Carroll quote
Quote:
"Now, HERE, you see, it takes all the running YOU can do, to keep in the
same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice
as fast as that!"
- Alice Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll |
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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SallyT
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OH yes, not going to sleep on time! I hadn't thought of that, but that's huge, and another wagon I keep getting on and falling off again. It's so tempting to sit up for just another few minutes in the quiet house, and before I know it, it's midnight, and I'm too tired really to do anything, but I can't make myself get up and go to bed. And then the next day -- dithering, brain-fog, and coffee jitters.
Sally
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knowloveserve
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SallyT wrote:
OH yes, not going to sleep on time! I hadn't thought of that, but that's huge, and another wagon I keep getting on and falling off again. It's so tempting to sit up for just another few minutes in the quiet house, and before I know it, it's midnight, and I'm too tired really to do anything, but I can't make myself get up and go to bed. And then the next day -- dithering, brain-fog, and coffee jitters.
Sally |
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Isn't that the sad reality?! By the end of the night, after the kids are finally in bed, and the chores finally done, I want to just relax and veg for a while with my husband. But in taking time to relax, we end up waking more tired the next day!
The reality is that I should just collapse into bed minutes after the kids go down. Sometimes I'm just too tired to veg. Oh the irony...
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Ellie
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SeaStar
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knowloveserve wrote:
SallyT wrote:
OH yes, not going to sleep on time! I hadn't thought of that, but that's huge, and another wagon I keep getting on and falling off again. It's so tempting to sit up for just another few minutes in the quiet house, and before I know it, it's midnight, and I'm too tired really to do anything, but I can't make myself get up and go to bed. And then the next day -- dithering, brain-fog, and coffee jitters.
Sally |
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Isn't that the sad reality?! By the end of the night, after the kids are finally in bed, and the chores finally done, I want to just relax and veg for a while with my husband. But in taking time to relax, we end up waking more tired the next day!
The reality is that I should just collapse into bed minutes after the kids go down. Sometimes I'm just too tired to veg. Oh the irony... |
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I really struggle with this, too. My dh travels a lot, so I am often home alone with the kids and usually go to bed soon after they do.
Then I try to get up early to have some quiet time- only I don't manage to get up or, if I do, I soon have company. So then I struggle with not having any time alone to have my brain to myself and cycle back to staying up too late
Have hamster wheel, will spin...
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Reclaiming lost time/time robbers
