| Author | |
*Lindsey*
Forum Pro
Joined: May 22 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 496
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 12:30pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
Dear moms,
I just found out this morning that I am pregnant. This is a huge shock considering we were using NFP to avoid another pregnancy. We've had 7 kids in less than 9 years.
I feel completely overwhelmed and tired most days, like I'm barely keeping things running smoothly here. I was hoping to have our 7 kids "under control" before another baby made an appearance. I honestly felt "done" with having babies and now feel so guilty for thinking/saying that I don't want anymore and fear God will punish me for it. (Silly and probably irrational, I know.)
Now I find myself a mix of emotions. Oliver's pregnancy and birth were very hard. I had MRSA infection 2x, subchorionic hemmorage/bed rest, and then during our homebirth his placenta started to detach, I began bleeding heavily and we rushed to the hosptial. Thanks be to God everything turned out well and he's a healthy little guy.
But, I. AM. TERRIFIED.
Please pray for me/us and give me any advice you've got!
__________________
Lindsey
Mama to DS (11), DD(9), twin dds(7), DD (5), DS (4), DS (3), and 5 angels in heaven.
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 1:17pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Praying, Lindsey. I have very high risk pregnancies, so I understand the terror. There are just some days where I just had to keep saying how much I trust in Jesus and accepted His Holy Will. I had to say it All.the.time, even though I wasn't feeling it. Grace did take over....
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
jawgee
Forum All-Star
Joined: May 02 2011
Location: New Hampshire
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1415
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 1:34pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Many prayers!
__________________
Monica
C (12/2001), N (11/2005), M (5/2008), J (8/2009) and three angels
The Catholic Cup on Facebook
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Booksnbabes
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 20 2008
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 4141
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 1:58pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Praying, Lindsey! I understand overwhelmed, terrified, and guilty for feeling less than excited about the whole idea of another little one.  It's easy to be on the outside saying, "What a blessing! Congratulations!," and quite another thing to be the one facing the very real challenges of pregnancy, childbirth, and another member in the family. Having experienced a difficult pregnancy last time around, those feelings are all the more natural and overwhelming.
Just know that in the midst of all you are feeling, God is with you. Not to punish but to protect, love, and carry you through it all. So surrender to that love. Each day, each moment you feel that fear overwhelming you, stop and breathe a prayer, "Into your hands, Lord," or even just, "Help!" Pray to be able to trust in this, His plan for you. Again, so easy to say, but not so easy to do! But we are here praying for you and with you. In Him we can do all things.
I love how a dear friend put it, "It wasn't my plan, but it is God's plan, so it has to be good!"
Sending lots of cyber and many, many  for a happy, healthy pregnancy.
__________________
Wife to wonderful DH, mom to SIX beautiful gifts from God!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
WithAllMyHeart
Forum Rookie
Joined: June 08 2012
Location: Georgia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 85
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 1:59pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
*Lindsey* wrote:
I was hoping to have our 7 kids "under control" before another baby made an appearance.
|
|
|
You're just kidding about this part, right? 
What great faith God must have in your ability to love and care for these children He continues to bless you with! Praying for peace of mind for you so that you can enjoy the beautiful gift of life you've received and for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby.
You can do this! God will provide...
__________________
-Jennifer
SAHM to a 3 yr old boy and a 1 yr old girl (hoping for more).
Looking for friends who live nearby!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Barbara C.
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 11 2007
Location: Illinois
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 882
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 2:21pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Total sympathy here. When I found out that I was pregnant with #5 last November, I was in total shock. Sure, we had slightly bent an NFP rule, but the chances of me getting pregnant when I did were like 1%.
I spent most of Advent hearing about how Mary just accepted the impossible task God had given her with out whining and complaining. And let's just say that I was feeling very "un-Mary" like.
I love all of the Lord's blessings, but I sometimes wish He wouldn't bless my like that anymore...or at least not until the long list of serious reasons we have for avoiding pregnancy get a little more resolved, IYKM.
That being said, I'm looking so forward to meeting my precious baby girl #5 in about 7 weeks, and even amidst my whiny/scared moments I knew that once the baby arrived we wouldn't be able to imagine our lives without her. Just try to keep that in mind...
__________________
Barbara
Mom to "spirited" dd(9), "spunky" dd (6), "sincere" dd (3), "sweet" dd (2), and baby girl #5 born 8/1/12!!
Box of Chocolates
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Maryan
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 02 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3145
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 2:30pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Lindsey
I have a bigger space than you, and just had my #7 and not my 8th, so I feel funny giving advice; however...
When it all gets overwhelming for me, I have put everyone in the car, put on a book on tape and then just drove around. No messes can be made. No 8 yo can be outside trying to kill a black snake while you're changing a diaper. No toddlers can dance on the table while you're nursing the baby... some semblance of "control."
And hit a drive thru... or a few if it's in the budget. And "Jesus, I trust in you" repeated 100x.
Prayers for you and your pregnancy. Especially no bedrest prayers -- because my advice doesn't work if you're on bedrest.
__________________
Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Angel
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 22 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2293
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 3:24pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Yep, I understand being terrified. Lots and lots and lots of prayers from here.
__________________
Angela
Mom to 9, 7 boys and 2 girls
Three Plus Two
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
joann10
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 10 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3493
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 3:34pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I have certainly been there myself...and trusting in God is the only way I got through....
Congratulations and be assured of my continued prayers...
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
AmandaV
Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 27 2009
Location: Texas
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 707
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 5:55pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Oh, Lindsey, I can understand overwhelmed. My first 4 are spaced about like your first 4, but then you've had three since in the time I had my 1, so I can only imagine. I have never felt able to "get under control" or "on top of" everything before the next... So I will offer my overwhelmed for yours, and for a healthy pregnancy, birth, and baby. Many prayers coming your way.
Oh, and read Maryan's advice for getting ready .. I feel like you posted something on here or your blog, Maryan, right? About preparing for baby and for bed rest pregnancies? I would probably try to fill my freezer, if you have a spare moment... I know they are so hard to come by. Maybe see if you can find a mother's helper for the summer.. a home schooled preteen with some time on their hands and who doesn't charge much or needs volunteer hours. Okay, I don't have much advice. But I will be praying. Blessings!
__________________
Amanda
wife since 6/03, Mom to son 7/04, daughter 2/06, twin sons 6/08 and son 7/11, son 1/2014
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
DominaCaeli
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3711
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 6:33pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I understand too. Mine have come so quickly, and sometimes I look at my life as an outsider and wonder how it isn't just absolute chaos here all the time.  The only reason that it isn't is because of God's grace--several of ours have come sooner than I anticipated, but it has *always* worked out just fine, thanks be to God (literally). When I got pregnant three months postpartum this time around, I have to admit that I was a little terrified (we weren't actively trying to avoid but it was still a surprise--I'm not sure why, given our history ). But now that I'm a couple months away from giving birth to Baby #6, I have no doubt that this transition will be doable--a little hectic, I'm sure, but definitely doable. I don't have that fear I had at the start of this pregnancy, mostly because my current baby (now 9 months--she'll be 12 months when this baby comes) has become the sweetest, most easy-going baby you could ever meet. God's doing, for sure--all my others have had fussy infanthoods, so this is such a change! I feel God's hand working, making way for this new little one in the midst of all these awaiting brothers and sisters...it feels very natural now, which I would never have guessed six months ago when I got that positive pregnancy test! Anyway, I'm not sure if that's helpful at all, but I will be praying for peace for you, Lindsey! And congratulations on this newest blessing.
__________________
Blessings,
Celeste
Joyous Lessons
Mommy to six: three boys (8, 4, newborn) and four girls (7, 5, 2, and 1)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
*Lindsey*
Forum Pro
Joined: May 22 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 496
|
| Posted: June 21 2012 at 8:01pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thank you all so much for your thoughtful words!! Between you wonderful ladies, and my DH (who is a gem, to be sure) I am already feeling better about things.
I was only on bedrest for a week or so with the subchorionic hemmorage and am not anticipating that to happen this time.
I am not sure why God has such faith in our ability as parents, because I feel like a mess most of the time. Clearly He knows more than I do.
And yes, I was *mostly* kidding about the "having the kids under control" part. I can dream, can't I?!
__________________
Lindsey
Mama to DS (11), DD(9), twin dds(7), DD (5), DS (4), DS (3), and 5 angels in heaven.
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Pilgrim
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 28 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1286
|
| Posted: June 22 2012 at 7:59am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Praying for you with empathy! We will add you to our list of Expectant Mothers we pray for daily with our Morning Offering. We are going to have 5 of our children 4 years old and under when this one arrives any day now, and just the daily, no make that minute-by-minute care sometimes can be overwhelming, such as having to cut up food for that many little ones before you can sit down and eat, and the constant "damage control", as they don't know what can harm themselves or others. And the oldest, while certainly a help with the littles most of the time, has learning difficulties, with lack of retention even with daily tasks, and is high maintenance in many ways. In spite of all that, each child is so precious to me/us, and I/we wouldn't exchange having them in our lives for anything. The time I think I love most is when we sit down at night for prayer time, and I see all these precious children lined up, I thank God for them. That is the time where each one is so precious to me, and I can sit and see all I love about each child, from the oldest on down.
I can relate to the difficult pregnancy part, as each pregnancy has had it's difficulties, and there is RARELY a moment I am not sick or in quite a bit of pain during my pregnancies. Yet, I survive, and in the end fall in love with each child. I am trying to learn to just take it as a matter of course that I will feel awful throughout pregnancy, learn to cope with it, and look forward to the baby when I can. I know in my mind that I love each child, and will be happy they are with us, but the pregnancies make me feel so awful, I don't usually have the warm fuzzies over the fact that I'm pregnant, it's hard to. Not to say I'm not happy we are expecting each time, it's just hard to FEEL all warm and fuzzy when you are so sick. I try to take little moments to do something every so often to be happy/excited over the new life that's coming, this time I've allowed myself to splurge a little once in a while to get something girly to be excited that we're having a girl. Like the new carseat we needed. It is so pretty nd girly, and it makes me cheerful, when dd asked "what if the next one is a boy?"(I've always been practical that way as well, and only gotten neutral things that would serve well for both genders). I told her that any boy who came after this would just have to accept the fact that he had to sit in a girly car seat as a baby if saw pictures of himself in it, or else I'll line it with a boyish receiving blanket. The point is I have tried to take the time to be able to be cheerful in the midst of the difficulties of feeling awful, and caring for so much in the family. And then there's times where you have to just let yourself sit and have a good cry when it overwhelms you. When i have a moment alone doing some little task, I let myself cry if I feel overwhelmed, and then I feel much better to go back and face the day.
You are not alone. We will pray you through this pregnancy, and pray you have a healthy pregnancy, and safe delivery!
__________________
Wife 2 my bf, g14,b8,g&b6,g4,g3,g1 1/2,4 ^i^
St. Clare Heirloom Seeds coupon 4Real 20% off
St. Clare Audio
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Bridget
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2198
|
| Posted: June 22 2012 at 12:28pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Maryan wrote:
When it all gets overwhelming for me, I have put everyone in the car, put on a book on tape and then just drove around. No messes can be made. No 8 yo can be outside trying to kill a black snake while you're changing a diaper. No toddlers can dance on the table while you're nursing the baby... some semblance of "control."
|
|
|
I've done that! I remember one day, every time I sat down to pay bills all heck would break loose. Those bills HAD to be paid. I strapped everyone in the van, got them food and lollipops (lollipops buy you extra time) and just parked and did the bills. Then we drove to the PO and mailed them.
Congratulations on the new pregnancy!
__________________
God Bless,
Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
Our Magnum Opus
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
dinasiano
Forum Rookie
Joined: July 17 2008
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 91
|
| Posted: June 23 2012 at 7:10am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Wow! All of you are so awesome. I just had to say that. It's so wonderful to have someplace to turn and get all this support and prayers. Lindsey, congratulations and I'll be praying for you and all of you on this forum.
Many blessings,
Dina- mom to 7
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
asplendidtime
Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 14 2005
Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 744
|
| Posted: July 27 2012 at 12:21am | IP Logged
|
|
|
You can do it. We've been there, it was all grace.
__________________
Rebecca~Mama to
Noah 17,
Katie 16,
Mary 14,
Tim 13,
Jonah 12,
Josh 10,
Zoe 9,
Will 7,
Peter 6,
Laura-Mae 4,
Emily-Joy 2,
Genevieve & Gabriella 1
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
*Lindsey*
Forum Pro
Joined: May 22 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 496
|
| Posted: Aug 11 2012 at 8:27pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thank you for your prayers. Sadly, I miscarried July 18/19, naturally at home. I was 8 weeks. I am currently getting my HCG levels checked weekly to make sure they continue to go down. We were at 324 last week, so I am praying next week will be the last time I have to go have it done.
__________________
Lindsey
Mama to DS (11), DD(9), twin dds(7), DD (5), DS (4), DS (3), and 5 angels in heaven.
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: Aug 11 2012 at 8:30pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I'm sorry, Lindsey. I am praying for your continued comfort.
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Donna Marie
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: New Jersey
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2530
|
| Posted: Aug 11 2012 at 8:44pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I am so sorry Lindsey!
Praying for you! 
__________________
God love you!
Donna Marie from NJ
hs momma to 9dc!!
Finding Elegant Simplicity
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JodieLyn
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006
Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 12234
|
| Posted: Aug 11 2012 at 9:04pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I'm so sorry Lindsay. It can be so hard when you have had to work through the hard emotions of an unexpected pregnancy and then lose the baby. btdt.
__________________
Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
Forum Locked) 
4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Expecting again...unexpectedly! UPDATE
