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CelesteMary
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| Posted: Aug 29 2011 at 11:07pm | IP Logged
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My 6th grader is expressing the dulldrums with homeschooling and thinks she is missing out on more fun and friends. Even though she has seven siblings, I guess it's still not as exciting as REAL school.
I admit I am hurt, but definitely trying not to be and not to take it personally. I know that the grass is always greener...
Have any of you ever felt pulled to put your child in public school?
In a million years I never thought I would consider such a thing.
All of the reasons for homeschooling are so true to me, how can a child understand this?
My husband has always wanted our children to be in the public schools like he was, and has never really supported or acknowledged the "homeschool thing."
Am I just fooling myself thinking I could do this with God's strength even though it seems like such a struggle going against the norm?
Ladies, if any of you have been in such a situation, I'd love to know how you handled it. Thanks and blessings to you all.
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 29 2011 at 11:33pm | IP Logged
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All kids I think grump at some time or other about their school.. homeschoolers just know there's another option.. so instead of just complaints about schooling you get rose colored glasses comparisons.. "I'm so bored, if I was in school I'd have friends and it would all be fun all the time". 
I just ignore it as much as I would any other grousing they'd do not claiming that public school is all that.
The difficulty you have is that you don't have 100% agreement with your dh.. so any mention of public school revives the battle (at least in your emotions).
What would she do if you basically told her "ain't happening, get over it" without getting emotional about it?
I would consider sending her if you are pretty sure that she'd push it to the point where your dh would feel like he needed to back her up. Not worth that division in your marriage. But on the other hand she could just be pushing your buttons to see what happens and really wouldn't get that far.
And in the meantime, is she actually experiencing some of the benefits of homeschooling? things that she would lose if she went to public school?
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Aug 30 2011 at 7:09am | IP Logged
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My parents followed advice and put my brother back in school when he was 10th grade, it did not help, it only made things worse, as all the negatives in his attitude were only reinforced, and all the turmoil only made home life more divided and more traumatic for everyone when he would rile things up with his rebellions or such, and his fighting my parents only got worse. I can't say what you should do, I'm not saying this is what would happen for sure in your case, but it is one side of what could happen. He never was satisfied by it, and was exposed to much more in the way of drugs, alcohol, p***ography, all that the public school holds that is not moral. The schools have only gotten worse with all the immorality and danger to a child soul and body.
I have had moments of thinking it would be easier to put dd in school, as she has been a difficult one to teach at times, and life has been so busy at times that our homeschool schedule has been inconsistant, which has not helped. Every time we would get back into the swing of things she would have trouble with it and be grumpy. But this year she is doing the best yet, and getting better at things, so it encouraging. I think it is always hard to not be tempted to put our kids in school, as like Jodie said there is an alternative out there. What always keeps me going in the end is knowing all of what's out there in the world, all that would try to steal my childrens souls, it's scary enough knowing they will face it when they grow up, and I am determined to give them the best I can and keep them here to learn all they can to defend them once they do grow up and head out into the world.
It is so very difficult to be the spouse who sees all you do, and knows the deep spiritual side of things, and to always fight for it. I have seen this closely in my life, in a number of marriages, and I know how hard it is. I'm sorry you have to bear that cross. I mean no negativity to your huband BTW, he only seeks to give your children what he feels was good in what he was raised with. So often when we are frustrated by something or worried for our childrens's souls especially, it's hard to see the heart of the other person. I will pray for strength, grace, and wisdom for God's will for your daughter, your marriage, and your family. Many hugs and prayers. 
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CelesteMary
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| Posted: Aug 30 2011 at 1:49pm | IP Logged
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Thanks guys. I needed that. I know very clearly what God told me to do. It does get difficult when you don't have that 100% back up from hubby.
He's a good father and husband and I love him dearly. I try to see these crosses as examples to witness to him also. I don't know if he actually sees it that way, but we never discussed these things in the beginning, so now we are having a few sprititual battles. Well, I don't know if he knows there is a spiritual battle for our children's souls, but I believe that with God's grace, if I continue to be obedient in a loving fashion, we will be blessed in the end and prayerfully God will touch his heart.
This morning we had our homeschool assessment and when I put last year's summary into words about what we actually did, pregnant, sick and all..it was so beautiful. I didn't realize we accomplished so much just by being a family. Just by sticking it out and showing the children how to stick things out. They pitched in with meals, housework, taking care of me and eachother so beautifully, and that wasn't even on the assessment. It was what they were able to do because we went through it together and not in seperate directions, only thinking about our own agendas. But helping for the benefit of the whole family.
I don't think that anyone who places their children in school is a failure. I know it is not for everyone. But God made it so clear to me and spoke into my heart so strongly about this topic, that I feel like I have to fight for it.
My dh said as long as they are prepared for college, he will support me. He is pretty hands off, but I consider it a tremendous blessing that he didn't just say, "no."
Even though he doesn't get it, he is willing to let me do it and not hinder me, though it sure would give me extra muscles if he was completely on board.
I spoke to my dd today and explained why we homeschool, which she already knows. But I told her that we started this way and I intend to complete what we started as a homeschooling family.
She understands, though she was disappointed. I also spent the day speaking to her about her future career and we even ordered a copy of an SAT study guide as I explained to her that this is our homeschool and we can go at any pace she likes. Which is fast. I also explained all of the benefits that she gets just by being here and how much she learns outside of "school hours". Like, we do everything around dh's schedule so when he is home and wants to take them fishing, they can just go. Sometimes I get a bit intimidated and forget that she is only eleven. She is so mature for her age.
We will work it out. But I needed to hear something from you guys. Thanks so much to you, JodieLyn and Pilgrim.
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Wife to Jeff, mother to Abigail 00, Thomas 02, Elizabeth 03, Charles 05,Amelia 07, Laura & Walter 09, Annie 11, one Angel in Heaven 2013,baby Maria Rose due 4/26/15.
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: I never thought I would consider this....
